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Format:40col
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<>                                  <>
<>     What Assholes Do.....        <>
<>                                  <>
<>     By THE BLADE                 <>
<>     A Neon Knight Presentation   <>
<>     Inspired by:                 <>
<>     "The Real Pirate"            <>
<>                                  <>
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
<> Dist: Metal Communications       <>
<>               &                  <>
<>         The Neon Knights         <>
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
 
 After viewing "The Real Pirate" file
 I saw that a few things were missing,
 mosly about what 'assholes do'.  If
 over %50 of this following  file
 pertains to you....I wood get out of
 the Pirating business untill you have
 reserected a new personallity.

<:><:><:> What Assholes Do <:><:><:>

Assholes hang up on a SYSOP when they
answer the phone.

Assholes hang up when a SYSOP breaks
in to see who they are.

Assholes call AE's and download 100 
programs and when the SYSOP wants a
new ware that they have, they want 
something in return.

Assholes crash AE's and BBS's (only
crashing a system is ok when the sysop
is an Asshole or the system really 
sucks.)

Assholes dont know where the DOS is
located on a disk.

Assholes stay in on friday and saturday
nights because they have no friends.

Assholes call BBS's and AE's from 9 am
untill 11 pm because they have nothing
better to do.

Assholes threaten to blow  up  your
system with a "yellow & black box".

Assholes listen to the TOP 40.

Assholes get all A's on their report
card...and are very upset with a 'B'.

Assholes call the same ae every 2 hours
to see if there are any new wares.

Assholes have pulse dial phones.

Assholes dont know how much an '800'
call costs.

Assholes USALLY (there are exceptions)
have MM//e's, Networker, prometheus, or
other modems that suck fuck.

Assholes buy ss/sd disks for $32 a 
box.

Assholes usally have Television sets
for a monitor.

Assholes name theirselves after dumb
animals:  THE CAT, THE WAREZWOLF,
THE PINK PANTHER, (PUT OTHER ASSHOLES
HERE).

Assholes have never touched a girl in
their life.

Assholes think 'control characters' are
police in a movie.

Assholes live in towns with the 
population thats under 500.

Assholes wear 'parachute pants'.

Assholes dont play sports.

Assholes have never used an Illegal
substance in their life.

Assholes use handles that are over
3 words long.

Assholes think krackowicz is still
around.

Assholes have daisy wheel printers.

Assholes dont have a phone next to 
their computer.

Assholes use their real name instead 
of a handle.

Assholes have hours on their systems.

Assholes don't own their computer.

Assholes only have 48 k.

Assholes pay to get  their modem
installed.

Assholes like Tina Turner, New Edition,
Cindy Lapur, Michael Jackson, Prince,
and The Pointer Sisters.

Assholes are Assholes.....

--------------------------------------
I've been wanting to get that off my
chest for a long while.  And dont 
forget, not everyone is perfect.  So
if more than 50 percent of this file
appilies to you.....Get A REAL life.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

What Assholes Do ][ will be at 
an AE near you soon...

Call the Metal Catsend- 
201-879-6668  Indvidual passwords

Metalland AE/BBS/CATSEND/10megs
            (503)538-0761

()()()(- A Neon Knight Release -)()()()
The Blade///1-1-85///Neon Knights//////
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