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- The Alaskan Trade Center *
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- (312) 251-0485 *
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// "The Jew File" //
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// by //
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// Jolly*Roger //
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// of //
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// //\\//eon ||<<nights & //\\//\\etal <<omm. //
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The Jewish race is a very strange one, indeed. They are short, ugly and
pretty damn arrogant when it comes to things; especially money. Why this is,
nobody really knows. I am writing this file so that all you non(fuckin)Jews
will know how to spot one, offend them, and not let them 'Jew' you out of
things.
How to spot one:
Fuckin Jews always have big noses. This is because air is free, and I
guess they figure they might as well hog it the same way they do with money
and bakeries. They are generally short, this being so they can quickly
spot and retrieve any loose change they spnt on the street. Why do
you think they were in the desert for forty years?? Jews always drive big
cars- BMWs, Mercedes, Cadillacs(Yes, they do have a little nigger runnin
through there vains!), Mark VIIs, etc... This is so they look bigger than
they actually are(Its funny how short people always try to look big), but you
can't blame them, afterall it must be tough not growing to be older than a 12
year old. When you do spot a Jew (usually at a bank, bakery, a beauty shop,
jewelry shops, hotels; anyplace that BIG money is involved!) threaten him and
destroy him at once. You ask why?? Because if you don't kill the dirty Jewbag,
he will most likely start one of those Goddamn Jewish leagues in your town.
If he gets that far, there are a few things you can do. 1) Leave town
2) Be a man, join the Klan! or 3) Burn the whole fuckin Jewish place down!
My personal favorite is #2. Thats because you usually have some high local
government officials in the KKK. They're pretty helpful legally when one of
the douche bag Jew lawyers try to go to court against you.
How to annoy them:
Annoying Jews is quickly becoming a sport more than just a thing you do when
bored. A good way to get them pissed is to call them up out of the fone book
(There easy to spot names make it simple- Goldstein, Goldwater, Goldberg,
just about anything that ends in 'stein', 'water','berg', or 'man' will be
a Fuckin Jew. When you finally spot a Jew in the fone book, be sure to
give them a call and ark them if they want to give a donation to the Egyptian
Weaponry Fund. If you really hate the bastards, then card them a couple sides
of Pork. I'm sure they'll enjoy it to the fullest!! Another thing you can do
to fuck up a Jew is steal his cap and put a little propeller on it. That'll
really get his heart pumping, he may even try to pick a fight with you. Not
to worry! There so small that they can hardly reach your face anyway. Just give
them a good hit on there little melonheads. Oh, and also make sure that you
give a good, hard kick in the Balls to ensqre that no future Jewbags can be
produced(Afterall, were trying to rid the earth on this punishment bestowed
on us from God).
Jews usually live in big houses, in rich neighborhoods near other Jews.
Its kinda like a little village of Jews. This is good because this means that
they are all in one place, so you don't have to travel far to kill them all.
A good time to visit a Jew is one of his fucked up holidays while he's
worshipping. That way, he won't make trouble because of it being so sacred to
his money-hungry little heart! Pay him a complement, like 'Hey, Goldberg,
Happy Yom Kippur!' The little Jew will probly become very enraged, not to
worry, just do as I said above(And kick him in the balls!).
Another way to get him riled is to make fun of that faggot six pointed star
they always worship, that'll really get them kickin!
Tips to about Jews:
Jews always have Big noses
Jews always wear dark sunglasses(to hide half of there nose so it'll look
normal)
Jews always own stores, unless there a Lawyers in which case they own a law
firm.
Jews always are short
Jews are always rich
Jews always live in big houses
Jews always go to private schools
Jews are always little geeks that grow up to be bigger, full grown ones
50% of the Jewish population in the U.S. lives in New York City.
40%?of the above 50% own a Deli
The remaining 10% in N.Y.C. get Bagels and Loxs at a discount so they can
eat it in there Lawyer offices.
The other 50% that live in the U.S. live in big cities such as Detroit and
Chicago(Do you know ANYBODY jewish that lives in Wyoming??)
Its getting late, so I think I'll end it right here, but if I get enough
response, I'll probly write a second file.
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If you feel offended in any way by this file, then good, because it
was ment to offend the Jewish race, so fuck off die!
I'd like to thank the following for inspiration and shit like that:
The Blade, The /Outland/,?The Metallian, Zandar Zan, Aerosmith,
The KKK, The Nazi's(For killing most of them off before I was born),
St. Pauli Girl brewery(for the refreshments!), and the U.S. Bong Co.
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Call up these boards when you get a chance:
The MetalWorks...................313/663-8103.....PW/Rape....300/1200
The Metal AE.....................201/879-(666)8...PW/Kill..3/12...4 Drives
Milliways........................609/921-1994.....10meg/AE/BBS/CF......
Metalland I West................503/538-0761.....10meg/AE/BBS/CF......
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(k) 1986 Neon Knights- Anybody changes the author's name or fucks with this
file is will be punished by death or a living hell!
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