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"The Camping Trip"
by Franken Gibe
>>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<<
-cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc-
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Larry: "I've heard there's been a lot of castration an' stuff in this trailer
park. So make sure you button up your fly, kid."
Sidney: "Don't worry. My cock is steel-belted. Nothin' short of a chain saw's
gonna even scratch that mamma."
Pam: "Titter. Ohhh, Sid! You card!"
Larry: "Well, Sidney, I've warned you. Nick Cave would likely stand by me in
my solicitude for my fellow man's genitalia."
Sidney and Pam [in unison, snidely]: "Oh, Larry. Bite the Big One."
Larry: "Brr-ahem. Fine."
... Later that evening ...
Rrrooom---rrrrroooom----rrrrmmmoooooommmmm-----whiiiiizzzzzz z--SNAP!
Sidney: "Ouch! Oh dear. I've been emasculated."
Larry: "Only radial tires are steel-belted, Sid. Certainly, God never thought
to fortify the male penis."
Pam: "Ooooo, Poor Little Siddy. Shall I kiss your boo-boo?"
Sidney: "I believe my boo-boo was jus' snatched up by a young, rather scruffy
squirrel."
Pam: "Perhaps it was Mary?"
[General laughter, including ruefully playful
gasps of agony from the dickless Sidney]
Larry: "Gafaw, gafaw! What a riot you are, Pamela. Let me thrust my love
muscle into your feline orifice. What say?"
Pam: "Well, I'm sure Sid wouldn't object. He hasn't a weenie."
Sidney: [grinning] "At least I'll save money on The Operation."
And so the camping trip ended in success. Pam went on to be a prostitute
in New York, and was strangled by a deranged bisexual midget. Larry became a
priest and died soon after of MYSTERIOUS anal lesions. Sid is now Sidella, and
resides in New Haven. (S)he enjoys knitting and cats.
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Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462||The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321
Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362||Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606
Question Authority........715/341-6516||TacoLand..................915/532-3226
Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194||The Metal AE..............201/879-6668
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(c)1988 cDc communications by Franken Gibe 9/5/88-74
All Rights Worth Shit