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Title: Accounting for Ourselves Author: CrimethInc., pfm Language: en Topics: community accountability, transformative justice, restorative justice, creative intervention, sex Source: https://web.archive.org/web/20190802071258/https://crimethinc.com/2013/04/17/accounting-for-ourselves-breaking-the-impasse-around-assault-and-abuse-in-anarchist-scenes Notes: PFM, Paul F. Maul
Sexual assault and abuse continue to plague anarchist circles and
spaces. In response, weâve developed processes to hold each other
accountable outside of the state. But why canât we seem to get them
right? This essay examines the context in which these community
accountability models emerged and analyzes the pitfalls weâve
encountered in trying to apply them. To move beyond the impasse around
sexual violence within our scenes, we need to challenge the idea of
community itself and take our resistance in new directions.
âI donât believe in accountability anymore⊠my anger and hopelessness
about the current model are proportional to how invested Iâve been in
the past. Accountability feels like a bitter ex-lover to me⊠the past
ten years I really tried to make the relationship work, but you know
what?â
â Angustia Celeste,
âSafety is an Illusion: Reflections on Accountabilityâ
Sexual assault and abuse tear us apart. They fracture our communities,
ruin individual lives, sabotage projects and organizing, reveal nasty
contradictions between our supposed ideals and our actual practices, and
maintain a climate of fear and oppression, especially for women. Sexual
assault is political; it is a function of patriarchy, not just an
individual harm done by individual people (usually men) to others (most
often women). Sexual assault and abuse, partner violence, child abuse,
and sexual harassment are primary ways that men physically impose
domination over women. Sexualized violence helps to maintain patriarchy,
heterosexism, trans oppression, ageism and oppression of youth, racist
colonialism, and genocide. The struggle against sexual assault and abuse
is essential for revolutionary transformation.
The accountability process model has been one of the primary tools used
by anarchists to address assault and abuse in recent years. This essay
analyzes this model in hopes of provoking honest, self-critical
discussion about how we respond to assault and abuse within anarchist
scenes, and imagining directions to move forward.
This article is NOT intended to serve as an accessible introduction to
community accountability processes; it assumes that you have some
knowledge of what they are and how they work (or donât work). It draws
specifically on North American anarchist, punk, and radical activist
subcultures and presumes that the reader understands their context and
language. If you donât, try reading some of the sources cited below
before this one. If youâre an anarchist and youâve had some experience
with efforts to respond to assault and abuse within your scene under the
label of âaccountability,â this is intended for you.
Gender is complicated; some folks we might perceive as male or female
donât identify that way, and some donât identify as either. In referring
to âmenâ or âwomen,â we mean folks who identify that way, whether
cisgender or transgender. Throughout this essay, both survivors and
people whoâve assaulted or abused others are referred to in general
using âtheyâ as a gender-neutral pronoun. Assault and abuse can be
committed by anyone against anyone, across gender lines; sometimes cis
women, trans men and women, and genderqueer folk assault, and often cis
men are survivors as well. But this acknowledgment should not erase the
fact that the vast majority of folks who abuse and assault are cis men,
and the majority of folks they abuse and assault are women.
Sexual assault and abuse are neither gender-specific (i.e., they can
only happen by or to people of a certain gender) nor gender-neutral
(i.e., the gender of a person who assaults or is assaulted is irrelevant
to the conversation). We must understand the gendered patterns of
assault and abuse as an expression of patriarchal domination, without
making invisible experiences that fall outside of that gendered
framework.
In speaking about accountability processes, weâre referring to
collective efforts to address harmâin this case, sexual assault and
abuseâthat focus not on punishment or legal âjusticeâ but on keeping
people safe and challenging the underlying social patterns and power
structures that support abusive behavior. In the loosest sense, this
might simply mean a few friends sticking up for someone whoâs been hurt:
asking them what they need, and trying to negotiate for those needs with
the person who hurt them and among the community they share. Some
processes involve a group that mediates between an individual and the
person calling them out, or separate groups supporting each person and
facilitating communication between them. These processes usually involve
setting out conditions or âdemandsâ for the person whoâs been called out
as a means of restoring safety or trust and preventing the harm from
happening again, and some method for following up to ensure that these
demands are met. All of these different approaches share an intention to
address the harm done directly without relying on the state.
Community accountability appeals to anarchists as a critical alternative
to the adversarial framework of the criminal âjusticeâ system. According
to this framework, two parties in conflict are assumed to have opposite
interests; the state considers itself the aggrieved party and thus acts
as mediator; and âjusticeâ means deciding which person is correct and
which person suffers consequencesâwhich are determined by the state, and
usually unrelated to the actual harm done or its root causes. In
contrast, restorative justice focuses on the needs of the ones harmed
and those who did harm, rather than the need to satisfy the abstract
principles of law or to exact punishment. Folks whoâve been harmed play
an active role in resolving a dispute, while those who harm are
encouraged to take responsibility for their actions and repair the harm
theyâve done. It is based on a theory of justice that sees âcrimeâ and
wrongdoing as an offense against individuals or communities rather than
the state. Many of the current working models for restorative justice
originated in Maori and North American indigenous communities.
Building on that framework, the transformative justice model links
restorative justiceâs focus on rectifying harm rather than strengthening
state power with a critique of systematic oppression. According to
Generation Five, an organization that grounds their work to end child
sexual abuse in this model, the goals of transformative justice are:
violenceâsystems of oppression and exploitation, domination, and state
violence
The anarchist practice of community accountability rests in theory on
these underlying principles, along with the DIY ethic and a focus on
direct action.
and the Current State of Things
How did this set of practices around responding to sexual assault and
abuse emerge? In the 1990s and early 2000s, women and other survivors
responded to assault and abuse in a variety of ways, including making
zines calling people out to distribute at shows, discussing their
experiences amongst themselves, warning people in other communities
about repeat assaulters, and in some cases physically confronting them.
The Hysteria Collective based in the Portland, OR area represented one
of the early structural attempts to respond to sexual assault, producing
and distributing literature, challenging the presence of abusive men in
the punk scene, and organizing a conference. In other towns, folks
formed girl gangs for self-defense and concerted confrontational action.
However, more often than not, such efforts were isolated, belief in rape
myths persisted amongst anarchists (especially men), and survivors who
attempted to speak out were ignored, shunned, dismissed for distracting
attention from more important issues, or blamed for COINTELPRO-style
divisiveness.
In response, anarchist women and others worked to encourage anarchist
scenes to take sexual assault and abuse seriously and promote a culture
of consent. Much of this spread through zine culture, particularly Cindy
Crabbâs Doris and Support zines; also, workshops began appearing at
radical conferences discussing survivor support, consent, and positive
sexuality. Menâs groups began to organize against sexual violence in
some radical scenes, such as the Dealing With Our Shit (DWOS) collective
founded in Minneapolis in 2002. A major turning point occurred at the
2004 Pointless Fest in Philadelphia, where concert organizers publicly
announced that three women had been raped at the event and established
collectives to support the survivors and figure out how to deal with the
rapists. These collectives became Phillyâs Pissed and Philly Stands Up,
long-standing separate but collaborating collectives devoted
respectively to survivor support and assaulter intervention.
Assault, accountability, and consent became topics at nearly all
anarchist conferences and gatherings. Many distros began to carry zines
on the subject, touring bands spoke from stage about it, and anarchists
in many other cities formed support and accountability collectives.
Organizers of mass mobilizations began to develop plans for response,
culminating in a full-scale sexual assault response infrastructure at
the anti-G20 convergence in Pittsburgh in 2009.
So how do things stand today? Terms such as âconsent,â being âcalled
out,â âaccountability process,â and âperpetratorâ are in wide use, to
the point of becoming the subject of jokes. A great many people have
been called out for abusive behavior, and dozens of accountability
processes are ongoing in various stages. An identity politics around the
labels âsurvivorâ and âperpetratorâ has emerged, with scenes polarizing
around them. In spite of efforts to caution against this and encourage
all participants in accountability processes to remain self-critical,
these labels have sometimes been used to leverage power, dispense or
deny legitimacy, and erase differences in experience.
Philly Stands Up continues their work, getting paid by colleges to lead
trainings on their model and functioning as a sort of semi-formal sexual
assaulter surveillance organization, with folks from around the country
contacting them for updates on different ongoing processes. They
networked with other groups doing transformative justice work at the US
Social Forum in Detroit and hosted a three-day training for community
accountability organizers in January 2011. Numerous other similar
collectives have been attempted among anarchists in other cities, though
few have had the longevity or prominence of PSU. As more and more
intra-scene communication moves onto the internet, a number of websites
(most prominently anarchistnews.org) have become major hubs for
shit-talking around the politics of assault and accountability. Websites
have also appeared giving information about specific individuals who
have assaulted or abused others.
Most anarchist gatherings now issue guidelines about consent and sexual
assault response, and often address the presence of people involved in
accountability processes. Based on the policies developed by sexual
assault response organizers at the 2009 Pittsburgh anti-G20
mobilization, organizers at the 2010 anti-IMF mobilizations in
Washington DC posted an announcement stating âNo Perpetrators Welcome.â
It explained that in an effort to make the demos safe for survivors,
âpeople who have perpetrated in the past, people running away from
accountability processes, and people who refuse to respect the IMF
Resistance Network consent guidelinesâ were prohibited from all
organizing spaces and events. More recently, organizers for the 2012
Toronto Anarchist Book Fair echoed this language banning all
perpetrators, but added:
We understand and respect that communities have engaged in their own
processes around these incidents. If you have gone through an
accountability process and the survivor, joined by the community, feels
you have sufficiently dealt with your shit, this statement does not
include you.
Likewise, the organizers of the 2012 New York Anarchist Book Fairbanned:
People who have perpetrated inter-personal violence, assault and/or
harassment unless they are actively engaged in an accountability process
and currently in compliance with all the terms and/or demands of that
process (according to the facilitators, the survivor, and/or whomeverâs
been designated to monitor the agreements emerging from the process).
A major source of controversy has been the pre-emptive banning of
individuals whoâve been called out for sexual assault or abuse from
anarchist gatherings. In recent years, survivors and their supporters
have increasingly requested for particular individuals who have sexually
assaulted others to be banned from upcoming events. Organizers have
struggled to prioritize believing survivors without pre-emptively
condemning people, and to balance transparency against privacy and
avoiding retraumatization. An internet brouhaha emerged when a person
online posted an email they had received from organizers of the New York
Anarchist Book Fair, asking them not to attend without specifying the
reason. Some interpreted the email as a Kafkaesque, authoritarian
presumption of guilt through anonymous rumor, while others defended it
as an effort to remain neutral while attempting to secure a sense of
safety for other attendees.
While controversies persist around our methods of response to sexual
assault, norms around sexuality have shifted significantly within
anarchist scenes in recent years. Discourses of consent have expanded,
while information about assault, survivor support, and options for
accountability has become increasingly available. This has noticeably
changed how we conduct sexual relationships, relate to our own bodies,
and respond to survivors. Compared to previous years, many anarchists
have become more conscious of sexual power dynamics and increasingly
empowered to communicate boundaries and desires.
However, sometimes abusers in anarchist communities âtalk the talkâ of
consent and support while doing the same old shit. As the author of âIs
the Anarchist Man Our Comrade?â challenges:
Accountability processes often do a lot of good but sometimes they just
teach men how to appear unabusive when nothingâs changed but the words
coming out of their mouth. Survivors and friends are left wondering if
said male is no longer a threat. Eventually the issue recedes from
peoplesâ minds because they donât want to seem overly reactionary and
donât know what further steps to even take and the perpetrator is able
to continue on in their life without much changing.
How can we prevent these discourses from being appropriated by the
sensitive anarcha-feminist sexual assaulter? It seems that the
availability of community accountability processes hasnât changed the
patterns of behavior they were developed to address. What isnât working
here?
Two important qualifications: first, these are pitfalls of
accountability processes as theyâre actually practiced, as weâve
experienced them. Some of these pitfalls arenât inherent to these
processes, but are simply mistakes commonly made by people who undertake
them. One might respond to many of these critiques by saying, âWell, if
people actually applied the model as itâs intended, that wouldnât
happen.â
Fair enough; but for any such model to be widely relevant and
applicable, it has to be robust enough to be able to succeed even when
conditions arenât optimal, or when folks donât or canât follow the model
perfectly. So bear in mind that these pitfalls donât imply that our
accountability models are futile or doomed. On the contrary,
becauseweâre invested in figuring out how to end assault and abuse, we
have to be unflinchingly critical in examining efforts to do so.
Second, the things people frequently say to avoid responsibility should
not be mistaken for problems with accountability processes. For example:
âThis stuff distracts us from the real revolutionary issues; itâs
divisive and hurts the movement; holding people accountable is
manipulative/coercive/overemphasized/a power grab,â and so forth. These
are not pitfalls of accountability processes; these are problems of
patriarchy and its supposedly anarchist apologists.
That said, here are some of the major difficulties weâve encountered in
the processes weâve developed to hold each other accountable for sexual
assault and abuse within anarchist scenes.
1) There is no clear sense of when itâs over, or what constitutes
success or failure. When can we say definitively that a certain person
has âworked on their shitâ? What will allow a survivor and their
supporters to feel comfortable with someone continuing to participate in
a shared community? When expectations arenât explicit, goals arenât
concrete, or the time-line and means of assessment arenât clear,
confusion and frustration can follow for everyone involved.
This often happens because we have so little experience with alternative
modes of resolving conflict and addressing harm that we donât know what
to look for. For instance, even if a person has âbeen accountable,â the
survivor may or may not necessarily feel better. Does this determine the
success or failure of a process? If someone has done all the things
asked of them, but others arenât sure if the steps taken were effective,
what could confirm that real change has taken place? It may or may not
actually be possible to restore trust after harm has been done; if not,
this may not be the right type of process to undertake.
Likewise, past what point can we agree that someone has NOT worked on
their shit, and we shouldnât bother wasting our time on it anymore? Some
accountability processes drag on for months and years, diverting
collective energy from other more fulfilling and useful ends. One
stubborn sexist can sour an entire scene on making good faith efforts to
hold folks accountableâwhich goes to show how important it is to know
when to end an attempted process before it drags everyone down with it.
If weâre going to invest so much time and energy in these processes, we
need a way to assess if itâs worthwhile, and when to admit failure. And
that requires determining what failure would mean: for instance, kicking
someone out of a scene, trying other modes of response, or admitting to
a survivor that we canât enforce their demands.
2) Standards for success are unrealistic. For instance, the common
demand that someone work on their proverbial shit is either too vague to
be meaningful, or practically translates to a profound psychological
transformation beyond the bounds of what we can achieve. As the article
âThinking Through Perpetrator Accountabilityâ puts it:
Perpetrator accountability is not an easy or short process⊠It takes a
lifelong commitment to change behaviors that are so deeply ingrained; it
requires consistent effort and support. When talking about follow-up, we
should be making schedules for weeks, but also talking about checking in
after months and years. It takes that kind of long-lasting support to
make real transformation possible.
Letâs be frank: if we expect people to remain involved in an
accountability process for some scumbag they donât even like for
years,and we expect this as a norm for an increasing number of processes
for different people, who may or may not be cooperativeâwe are not
setting a realistic standard.
Thatâs not to say that the article is wrong; transformation of
patriarchal and abusive behavior patterns is a lifelong process. But is
it really a surprise that we fail to sustain these difficult,
unrewarding processes stretching over such lengths of time, when few
anarchists in our scene follow through on long-term commitments to even
our most fervent passions? What can we realistically commit to doing?
3) We lack the collective ability to realize many demands. We can say
weâre committed to meeting survivor demands, but thatâs just empty
rhetoric when that would require resources we donât have. Do we know of
suitably anti-authoritarian feminist counselors and therapy programs,
and can we pay for them when the person called out canât? Can we enforce
our wishes on someone who isnât cooperativeâand as anarchists, should
we? What consequences can we enact that actually matter? In a transient
subculture, can we realistically commit to following up with someone for
years into the future, and establishing structures of support and
accountability that will last that long?
One phrase commonly used in survivor demands and support discourse is
âsafe space,â that ever-elusive place in which survivors will be able to
feel comfortable and fully reintegrated into collective life. What does
safety mean? Is it something that we can promise? From reading the
policies of recent anarchist gatherings, it appears that the primary
method of securing safe space involves excluding people who have harmed
others. But safety means more than quarantining those who have ruptured
it for particular people, since rape culture and patriarchy suffuse all
of our livesâtheyâre not just the result of a few bad apples. While
exclusion can shield survivors from the stress of sharing space with
people whoâve harmed them, and help to protect folks in our community
from repeatedly abusive people, exclusion falls painfully short of
safety. In fact we may rely on banning others from spaces less because
it keeps people safe than because itâs one of the only safety-related
demands we can actually enforce.
In the essay âSafety is an Illusion,â Angustia Celeste condemns the
âfalse promises of safe spaceâ:
We canât provide survivors safe space; safe space in a general sense,
outside of close friendships, some family and the occasional affinity,
just doesnât exist⊠there is no such thing as safe space under
patriarchy or capitalism in light of all the sexist, hetero-normative,
racist, classist (etc.) domination that we live under. The more we try
and pretend safety can exist at a community level, the more disappointed
and betrayed our friends and lovers will be when they experience
violence and do not get supported.
What would genuine safety for survivors and for all of us look like? Are
there other strategies in that direction that we can enact beyond
exclusion and ostracism?[1]
4) We lack skills in counseling, mediation, and conflict
resolution.Often survivor demands include finding a counselor or
mediator. To be effective, this person should be willing to work for
free or on a sliding scale; hold anti-authoritarian politics and a
survivor-conscious feminist analysis; have the time and energy to take
an active role in working with someone over a long period of time; and
be close enough to the community to understand its norms, without being
directly involved in the situation. How many of these people are there?
How many of us even have basic active listening skills, let alone the
ability to navigate complex dynamics of consent and assault, patriarchal
conditioning, anti-authoritarian conflict resolution, and psychological
transformation? And for those few who do fit the bill, or at least come
close, how many arenât already swamped and overwhelmed?
Perhaps this is everyoneâs fault for not collectively prioritizing these
skill sets. Fine, but what do we do right now? And how do we avoid
creating a division of labor where folks with a certain set of skills or
lingo become akin to authorities within anarchist versions of judicial
processes?
5) This stuff depresses people and burns them out. Itâs intense,
emotionally draining work to engage in community accountability, often
with little appreciation or compensation. It can be exhausting and
unrewarding, particularly when the processes rarely succeed in keeping a
community intact while satisfying all participants. The gravity of the
work scares people off, and understandably so.
This isnât to say that we should try to make community accountability
for sexual assault and abuse fun and lighthearted. But we need to
acknowledge that this is a barrier to people stepping up and staying
committed for the long-term involvement weâre saying is necessary for
success. And these problems are magnified when we rely on skills and
experience that only a few people in our circles have.
6) Accountability processes suck up disproportionate time and energy.
None of us signed up for anarchy because we love participating in
exhausting, interminable processes to address the stupid ways people
hurt each other within our subcultural bubbles. We became anarchists
because we hate cops, because we love punk shows, because we want a
freer world, and for a million other reasons. When we spend so much time
and energy trying to resolve internal conflicts and convince
intransigent sexists to take responsibility for changing their behavior,
we risk cutting ourselves off from the passions that brought us together
in the first place.
Itâs easy to get demoralized about anarchist politics when we canât even
stop assaulting each other, let alone smash the state and abolish
capitalism. Itâs not that working to end sexual assault and patriarchy
is not revolutionaryâon the contrary! But if accountability
processesâŻparticularly frustrating and unsuccessful onesâŻcome to occupy
too much of our collective energy, weâre not likely to stay engaged and
bring new folks into our struggles.
We canât sweep assault and abuse under the rug and silence survivors in
the name of false unity. This previous norm perpetuated oppression and
made us less effective all around, prompting community accountability
efforts to emerge in the first place. We have to find a way to deal with
our abusive behavior that doesnât swallow up all of our energy and
demoralize us.
7) Subcultural bonds are weak enough that people just drop out.Bear in
mind that many of the less coercive models of restorative justice on
which community accountability frameworks are based originated in
smaller-scale indigenous societies, with stronger social and cultural
affinities than most any of us in the current United States can imagine.
The notion that we should attempt to preserve the community and allow
folks whoâve hurt others to remain integrated into it relies on the
assumption that all parties are invested enough in this âcommunityâ to
endure the scrutiny and difficult feelings that accompany going through
an accountability process. The affinities that draw people into punk and
anarchist scenes often arenât strong enough to keep people rooted when
they feel threatened by what theyâre asked to do. Folks whoâve been
called out often just pick up and leave town, sometimes even
preemptively before theyâre called to account for their shitty behavior.
Short of communicating with similar social networks in the assaulterâs
new destination (which happens increasingly often), thereâs not much we
can do to prevent that. When the primary consequences we can exact for
noncompliance with accountability demands involve forms of ostracism and
exclusion, people will avoid these by skipping town or dropping out.[2]
8) Collective norms encourage and excuse unaccountable behavior. Our
individual choices always occur in a social context, and some of the
collective norms of anarchist scenes facilitate, if not directly
justify, kinds of behavior that have often led to boundary-crossing and
calling out.
For example, in many anarchist scenes, a culture of intoxication
predominates and most social gatherings center around alcohol and drug
use. Few safeguards exist when folks drink or use to excess, and few
alternative spaces exist for those who want to stop or reduce their
drinking or using without losing their social lives. Humor and
conversation norms reinforce the notion that extreme drunkenness is
normal and funny, and that people are less responsible for their actions
while drunk then while sober. Weekend after weekend, we create highly
sexualized spaces with strong pressure to get intoxicated, resulting in
groups of people too drunk or high to give or receive solid consent.[3]
Then in the aftermath of the harm caused in those situations, we expect
individuals to deal with the consequences of their choices on their own,
rather than all of us taking responsibility for the collective context
that normalizes their behavior.
Of course, none of these dynamics excuse abuse. But sexual assault takes
place in a social context, and communities can take or avoid
responsibility for the kinds of behavior our social norms encourage.
Alcohol and drug use is just one example of a group norm that excuses
unaccountable behavior. Other entrenched dynamics that folks seeking
accountability have cited as hindering their efforts include the
idolization of scene celebrities (people in popular bands, renowned
activists, etc.); the notion that sexual and romantic relationships are
âprivateâ and not the business of anyone outside of them; and the belief
that groups who face systematic oppression (such as queers and people of
color) shouldnât âair the dirty laundryâ of intra-community violence,
since it could be used to further demonize them.
Are we willing to examine and challenge our group norms on a collective
level, to see how they promote or discourage accountable behavior? Is it
possible to hold entire scenes collectively accountable for what we
condone or excuse? Attempting to hold a whole group of people
accountable in some structured way would likely multiply all of the
problems we experience with accountability processes oriented around a
single person. Yet without acknowledging and challenging our collective
responsibility, holding individuals accountable wonât be enough.
9) The residue of the adversarial justice system taints our application
of community accountability models. Some of the most vitriolic backlash
against accountability processes has been directed at their
pseudo-judicial nature. On the one hand, folks whoâve harmed others
rarely have experience being called to account for their behavior except
via authoritarian systems; attempts to do so often prompt accusations of
âwitch-hunts,â âauthoritarianism,â and cop/judge/lawyer/prison
guard-like behavior. Previously anti-state militants often do miraculous
turnarounds, suddenly becoming extremely interested in the US
governmentâs guarantees of âjusticeâ: âWhatever happened to innocent
until proven guilty, man? Donât I get a fair trial? Canât I defend
myself? Listen to my character witnesses!â
On the other hand, folks pursuing accountability have received similar
conditioning into adversarial conflict resolution, so it can be very
easy to fall into that mode of framing the processâespecially when faced
with an infuriatingly stubborn anarcho-rapist. Some participants have
used accountability processes as a way to threaten consequences or
leverage power over others. While this may be an understandable response
to the frustration and powerlessness often felt in the aftermath of
abuse and assault, it can undermine attempts to pursue non-adversarial
solutions.
A damning critique of the failure of anarchist accountability processes
to escape the logic of the legal system comes in a communiquéexplaining
why a group of women physically confronted a sexual assaulter:
We did what had to be done out of sheer necessity. As radicals, we know
the legal system is entrenched in bullshitâmany laws and legal processes
are racist, classist, heterosexist and misogynist. Alternative
accountability processes, much like the traditional ones, often force
the survivor to relive the trauma of the assault and force her to put
her reputationâa problematic concept in itselfâon the line as âproofâ of
her credibility. They end up being an ineffective recreation of the
judicial process that leaves the perpetrator off the hook, while the
survivor has to live through the memory of the assault for the rest of
her life. The US legal system and the alternative community-based
accountability processes are simply not good enough for survivors, and
certainly not revolutionary.
10) Sexual assault accountability language and methods are used in
situations for which they were not intended. One example of this
misapplication involves the widespread use of the principle of rape
crisis survivor support specifying that supporters should âalways
believe the survivor.â This makes perfect sense in a rape crisis
organization setting, solely focused on providing emotional support and
services to an individual whoâs experienced a form of trauma that is
widely disbelieved, when being believed is instrumental to the healing
process. But this doesnât make sense as a basis for conflict resolution.
In rape crisis counseling settings, or when someone discloses to you as
a trusted friend seeking support, the focus should remain on the needs
of the survivor. But transformative justice involves taking into account
the needs and thus the experiences and perspectives of all parties
involved, including the person who assaulted.
This does not mean that we have to figure out whoâs telling the truth
and whoâs lying; thatâs the residue of the adversarial system again. Nor
does this mean that all perspectives are equally valid and no one is
right or wrong. It does mean that to encourage someone to be
accountable, we have to be willing to meet them where theyâre at, which
means accepting that one personâs experience can vary significantly from
that of someone else. Being accountable requires being open to the
possibility that one is wrong, or at minimum that someone else could
experience the same event in a dramatically different, hurtful way. But
having the survivor entirely define the operating reality may not lend
itself to this mode of community accountability.
Another example of the overuse and misapplication of sexual assault
accountability discourse comes when people call others into
accountability processes for a wide range of behaviors that arenât
sexual assault. For instance, if someone feels angry and hurt after the
breakup of a non-abusive relationship, it might be tempting to frame
their grievances through the lens of calling someone out and demanding
accountability. It could take the form of demanding that someone be
banned from certain spaces, drawing on the gravity this exerts as a
common accountability process demand. Itâs understandable that folks who
feel angry or hurt for any number of reasons might want the kind of
instant validation of their feelings that can come (in some circles)
from framing oneâs hurt and anger as a call-out requiring
âaccountabilityââwhether or not that process and language makes sense
for the situation.[4]
This is dangerous not only because these terms and tactics were designed
for certain types of conflicts and not others, but also because their
overuse may trivialize them and lead others to treat dismissively the
very serious situations of assault and abuse for which they were
developed. Itâs encouraging that issues of sexual assault and abuse have
entered so widely into the discourses of radical communities. But we
should be careful to avoid generalizing the methods developed for
responding to one specific set of conflicts and oppressive behaviors to
other situations for which they werenât intended.
In some cases, folks frustrated by someoneâs problematic behavior have
even felt reluctant to call the person out on it for fear of that person
being labeled a âperpetrator,â or of others presuming the hurtful but
mild form of non-consensual behavior to have been sexual assault, and
thus the person addressing it to be a âsurvivor.â When this overuse of
sexual assault accountability language dovetails with the identity
politics around survivor/perpetrator and policies such as the âno perps
allowedâ statement, this effort to promote accountability could end up
discouraging people from speaking out against other forms of crummy
behavior, for fear of someone being permanently tarred with the âperpâ
brush rather than having a few conversations, apologizing, and reading a
zine.
So where do we go from here? The widespread disillusionment with
accountability processes suggests that weâve reached an impasse. Weâre
proposing four possible paths to exploreânot as solutions to these
pitfalls so much as directions for experimenting to see if they can lead
to something new.
âI wanted revenge. I wanted to make him feel as out of control, scared
and vulnerable as he had made me feel. There is no safety really after a
sexual assault, but there can be consequences.â -Angustia Celeste,
âSafety is an Illusion: Reflections on Accountabilityâ
Two situations in which prominent anarchist men were confronted and
attacked by groups of women in New York and Santa Cruz made waves in
anarchist circles in 2010. The debates that unfolded across our scenes
in response to the actions revealed a widespread sense of frustration
with existing methods of addressing sexual assault in anarchist scenes.
Physical confrontation isnât a new strategy; it was one of the ways
survivors responded to their abusers before community accountability
discourse became widespread in anarchist circles. As accountability
strategies developed, many rejected physical confrontation because it
hadnât worked to stop rape or keep people safe. The trend of
survivor-led vigilantism accompanied by communiquéscritiquing
accountability process models reflects the powerlessness and desperation
felt by survivors, who are searching for alternatives in the face of the
futility of the other available options.
However, survivor-led vigilantism can be a valid response to sexual
assault regardless of the existence of alternatives. One doesnât need to
feel powerless or sense the futility of other options to take decisive
physical action against oneâs abuser. This approach offers several
advantages. For one, in stark contrast to many accountability processes,
it sets realistic goals and succeeds at them. It can feel more
empowering and fulfilling than a long, frequently triggering, overly
abstract process. Women can use confrontations to build collective power
towards other concerted anti-patriarchal action. Physical confrontation
sends an unambiguous message that sexual assault is unacceptable. If
sexual violence imprints patriarchy on the bodies of women, taking
revenge embodies female resistance. Above all, itâs unmediated; as the
author of the article âNotes on Survivor Autonomy and Violenceâ wrote:
A common criticism of accountability processes of all varieties is their
tendency to mirror some sort of judicial systemâstructured mediation
toward rehabilitation or punishment of one kind or another. While an
outcome dictated by the survivor is certainly not akin to one dictated
by the state, the process remains a mediation. Conversely, to move away
from this judiciary is to reject mediation, a remnant of the idea that
our interactions must be somehow guided by third parties, even third
parties we choose ourselves. To that end, an attack on oneâs rapist is
unmediated and direct, precisely that which any judicial system forbids;
the line between desire and action is erased.
Of course, there are plenty of disadvantages to vigilantism, too.
Choosing to escalate the situation brings serious risks, both legally
and physically. Cops are more likely to bring charges for a group
physical assault on a man than an âallegedâ sexual assault. And, as
advocates for battered women know, partner violence has a very real
possibility to turn deadly; more women are killed by their partners than
by any other type of attacker. Beyond the immediate risks, you canât
beat up a social relationship, as they say; throttling an individual
scumbag doesnât do much to make anyone safer or end systematic rape
culture, however satisfying it may feel to a vindicated survivor. As
mentioned above, the desire to address the roots of rape culture in
responding to individual assaults helped give rise to community
accountability efforts in the first place.
Thereâs also a legacy of non-survivor-accountable vigilantism, a type of
male violence that has been widely identified by survivors and anarchist
women as being more about masculine ego trips than promoting healing and
safety. A critique of this phenomenon comes from Supporting a Survivor
of Sexual Assault, a zine oriented towards male allies of survivors, in
its discussion of the principle âNo More Violenceâ:
Is kicking a rapistâs ass going to make the rape not have happened? Will
his pain make the survivorâs go away? Does the survivor need to be
trying to chill out another out-of-control, violent man? Probably not.
Since non-trans men commit the overwhelming majority (some say over 99%)
of sexual assaults, men who are supporting a survivor need to be
especially conscious of the impact of male violence. It is male violence
that causes rape, not what ends it. Your actions must be those of ending
male violence.
We cannot speak for the responses that survivors, women in particular,
may make to rape. If women, as a majority of survivors, decide to
collectively respond in a way that involves violence or asking male
supporters to participate in violence; that is something for women and
survivors to work out for themselves. For men who are supporting a
survivor, however, it is absolutely essential that you put aside your
desires for masculine retribution and interrupt the cycle of male
violence⊠It is not your responsibility, or right, to come in
vigilante-style and take matters into your own hands.
This critique influenced the decision of groups like DWOS in Minneapolis
to adopt ânon-violenceâ as a principle. Notice, however, that this
critique intentionally does not apply to survivor-led vigilantism, but
to unaccountable non-survivor responses.
Apologists for anarchist men attacked by survivor-led groupsclaim that
vigilantism is authoritarian: âAccountability cannot be a one-way street
or else it becomes a synonym for punitive and policing power.â But as
the survivor communiqués make clear, vigilantism is not a form of
âaccountability,â at least not community accountability based on
transformative justice as itâs generally conceived within anarchist
circles; itâs an explicit rejection of it. Itâs not a pseudo-judicial
process; it declines both state-based and non-state methods of conflict
resolution in favor of a direct, unmediated response to harm. Whether or
not we think itâs appropriate, it shouldnât be mistaken for a form of
accountability gone wrong. On the contrary, itâs an intentional response
to the perceived failure of accountability methods.
So long as our practices around accountability for sexual assault and
abuse donât successfully meet folksâ needs, vigilantism will continue,
challenging anarchist advocates of transformative justice to make their
ideals a reality. Should we be trying to develop sufficiently effective
accountability responses so that vigilantism isnât necessary? Or should
we be developing and extending our practices of survivor-led physical
confrontation?
Itâs an obvious point, but worth making: instead of spending all this
energy trying to figure out how to support people whoâve been assaulted
and respond to those who assault, wouldnât it make more sense to focus
on preventing all this assaulting in the first place? Easier said than
done, of course. But so far, weâve only discussed reactive,
after-the-fact responses to forms of harm that weâre assuming will
continue, even as we figure out better ways to react.
To borrow the language of the nonprofit rape crisis center world,
responding to assaults and working with assaulters through
accountability processes falls under intervention, or tertiary
prevention. Primary prevention entails preventing first-time assault and
abuse through education and by shifting social, cultural, and
institutional norms, while secondary prevention involves identifying
risk factors associated with assault and abuse and intervening to
prevent them from escalating. So we shouldnât necessarily deem responses
such as accountability processes failures if sexual assaults continue in
anarchist communities. Instead, we should broaden the kinds of
preventative work weâre doing alongside them. What might we be doing to
stop all this from happening in the first place?
Outside of anarchist circles, prevention work around gender violence
usually centers on education: for women, around self-defense and harm
reduction; for men, around combating rape myths and taking
responsibility for ending male violence; and for all, healthy
communication and relationship skills. In anarchist circles, some women
have mobilized around sharing self-defense skills, and a great deal of
popular education (mostly led and conducted by women) has taken place
around consent, communication with partners, and positive sexuality. As
noted above, while this has noticeably shifted the sexual discourses
used by anarchists, we need more extensive engagement with gender
oppression to break entrenched patterns.
One pathway towards this deeper transformation has come through
gender-based collectives, specifically menâs groups focusing on changing
attitudes towards sexuality and consent among men. However, with a few
exceptions such as DWOS in Minneapolis, the Philly Dudes Collective, and
the Social Detox zine, there has not been much visible presence in
recent years of anti-sexist menâs organizing among anarchists.
Previously in certain scenes, anti-sexist menâs groups allied with
autonomous womenâs organizing. These formations are currently out of
fashion for a number of reasons, including anti-feminist backlash, a
certain understanding of trans and genderqueer politics that labels all
gender-based organizing as essentialist and problematic, and the
absorption of so many committed anti-patriarchy militants of many
genders into sexual assault response and accountability work. Could
forming anti-sexist menâs groups to do assault and abuse prevention work
in tandem with autonomous womenâs organizing prove fruitful as another
direction in which to experiment?
This approach could offer several advantages. Creating structures to
share skills for dismantling patriarchy and self-transformation might
reduce problematic behaviors among participants while also providing an
infrastructure for accountability responses when folks did harm others.
Pre-existing menâs groups allow folks to take responsibility for
self-education and action against patriarchy that doesnât have to be
contingent on a âperpetratorâ label or âdemands.â And folks could be
referred to groups for a wide range of behaviors that might not raise
eyebrows on their own but could be warning signs of underlying
patriarchal patterns, so that others can intervene before those patterns
manifest in more harmful ways (i.e., secondary prevention). For once,
weâd have a place to offer folks who, whether by community compulsion or
self-motivation, want to âwork on their shit.â
But beyond just dealing with problematic behaviors, menâs groups provide
space for deeper relationship building, learning, political
clarification, emotional intimacy, even fun. This should provide
incentive for folks to get involved and stay engaged, since itâs not
centered solely on debilitatingly intense crisis-mode accountability
work. The kinds of study, reflection, and relationship-building that
take place in these groups can strengthen the other radical organizing
folks are doing in anarchist scenes, leaving us with more options,
skills, and people able to respond in crisis situations. And unlike many
internally-focused community accountability strategies, menâs groups can
interact with non-anarchist individuals and groups to spread
anti-patriarchal messages and practices while learning from other
feminist organizing, making our efforts relevant to broader social
struggles against gender violence and patriarchy.
But wait⊠what about this whole gender thing? Amid the current gender
politics of North American anarchist scenes, itâs common to view any
gender-specific organizing as suspect. Isnât this just a remnant of
tired identity politics, vestiges of leftist guilt, outdated
essentialism, and suspiciously authoritarian practices? Donât we want to
destroy the gender binary, the real root of patriarchy and gender
oppression? And doesnât organizing based on gender (or assigned gender
or whatever) just reinforce the patriarchal and transphobic framework
weâre trying to destroy?
Certainly there are difficult questions to address in determining who
âcountsâ as a man, whether we base our understanding on
self-identification or social recognition or birth assignation, where
different genderqueer and trans folks fit, and figuring out who was
âsocializedâ how. And ending hierarchy and alienation in all their forms
will require strategies more liberating than identity politics. But
letâs be realistic: distinct patterns of oppressive behavior and power
still fall pretty predictably along gender lines. If gender-based
organizing can help dislodge those patterns, perhaps we must embrace
that contradiction and do our best to engage with it in all its messy
complexity.
Beyond the question of gendered organizing in principle, there are other
possible problems with this approach. Without subscribing to the notion
that there are âgoodâ anarchist men whoâre not the sexual assaulters we
need to worry about, we can acknowledge that the folks who might benefit
most from examining their sexist behavior will likely be least inclined
to participate. Also, participating in a formal menâs group could be a
way for sexists to gain legitimacy, diverting attention from their
crappy behavior by waving their feminist ally membership cards at people
who call them out. And if the focus on gender-based organizing
privileges menâs groups, even anti-sexist ones, over autonomous womenâs
and/or trans organizing, that could stabilize rather than challenge
patriarchal power relations in a scene.
Our struggles for accountability suffer because we have so few models,
methods, or skills for resolving conflicts amongst ourselves. While itâs
admirable that weâve put so much energy into figuring out strategies for
responding to assault and abuse, there are innumerable other kinds of
conflict and problematic behaviors that we also need tools to
addressâand as weâve seen, the sexual assault-specific accountability
methodologies arenât appropriate in dissimilar situations. What if we
prioritized building our conflict resolution and mediation skills?
Of course, there are specific issues relevant to sexual assault and
abuse, and these shouldnât be eclipsed in a general focus on conflict
resolution. But if thereâs a precedent, language, and skill set for
addressing a wide range of conflicts and harm, and being asked to
participate in a conflict resolution process becomes common and less
threatening, perhaps weâll be able to respond less defensively when we
learn that our actions have hurt others. Rather than extending the
identity politics of survivor and perpetrator, we could create more
nuanced language that neither idealizes nor demonizes people, but asks
all of us to remain engaged in lifelong processes of
self-transformation. This requires empathy towards folks who have done
harm, to create space for them to own up to their behaviors and heal.[5]
What are the advantages of framing sexual assault accountability
processes within a broader emphasis on conflict resolution? There would
be no need for a definitional hierarchy or litmus test to determine what
âcountsâ as serious assault or abuse. By setting a precedent of
collective engagement with less intense conflict, we would gain valuable
experience to serve us in crisis situations. Framing conflict resolution
as a collective responsibility could prevent the emergence of a
specialized class of people who always facilitate these processes, and
make it easier to find supporters with sufficient distance from a
situation to be able to mediate neutrally.[6]
One cautionary point needs to be made very clearly: mediation is not
appropriate for many cases of partner abuse. The article âThinking
Through Perpetrator Accountabilityâ lays it out:
Mediation should not be used as a substitution for an accountability
process. Mediation is for two people having a conflict that needs to be
resolved; abuse is not mutual. Abuse is not simply about two people
needing to come to the table to work things out. Mediators may certainly
be useful for helping to facilitate some of the concrete negotiations
within an accountability process, but please do not suggest a session
with a mediator as an option instead of a long-term commitment to an
accountability process.
Counselors for domestic violence survivors learn that âcouples
counselingâ should not be undertaken in a clear situation of partner
abuse, because abusers will usually manipulate the process, leaving the
abusive and unequal dynamics underlying the relationship unaddressed.
This is important to bear in mind so that a shift to a conflict
resolution framework isnât applied to situations of abusive
relationships.
What about other disadvantages? Well, thereâs still the problem of
responding to existing problems by prescribing solutions that demand
skills or resources we donât have. What can we do in the meantime, while
undertaking the long-term work of learning how to resolve our conflicts?
Survivors might feel frustrated to see assault and abuse lumped in with
less intense or politically significant conflicts, minimizing the harm
theyâve experienced. Asking survivors to use less forceful language when
addressing perpetrators could reinforce the survivor-blaming messages
that they are overreacting, that sexual assault is not a significant
issue worth naming strongly. Also, male âexpertsâ in conflict resolution
could hijack survivor support work and divert its feminist focus. We
must acknowledge the specific context of sexual assault and abuse, honor
the pain and rage of survivors, and account for oppressive power while
broadening the range of conflicts we can address.
There is no such thing as accountability within radical communities
because there is no such thing as communityânot when it comes to sexual
assault and abuse. Take an honest survey sometime and you will find that
we donât agree. There is no consensus. Community in this context is a
mythical, frequently invoked and much misused term. I donât want to be
invested in it anymore.
â Angustia Celeste, âSafety is an Illusion: Reflections on
Accountabilityâ
At the heart of all of these questions lies one unresolved problem: what
is âcommunity?â Are we in one together as anarchists? As punks? As
people in a certain local scene? Because weâre at the same protest,
show, or mass mobilization? Do we choose to be in it, or are we in it
whether we like it or not, regardless of how we identify? And who
decides all of this?
You canât have community accountability without community. The entire
transformative justice framework falls apart without some coherent sense
of what community means. But unfortunately, no one seems to be able to
answer this question for our milieu. And without an answer, we find
ourselves banging our heads against the wall again and again, when a
slimy assaulter just skips town or drops out of the scene after being
called out, or when someone wields enough power in a scene to
gerrymander the boundaries of community to exclude survivors and allies.
This is not an abstract question: itâs fundamental to what we do and how
power operates in our scenes.
Community becomes concrete through specific institutions, such as the
websites, gatherings, social centers, and collective houses that
comprise the North American anarchist scene. Although no one is taking
attendance (except possibly the FBI), and many of us quarrel about who
counts as a real anarchist, those of us who move through these spaces
have a sense of being a part of something. We weave together this sense
through shared practices that mark us as teammates: dress and body
modification, quirks of diet and hygiene, conversation with specialized
lingo and points of reference.
But is being a part of an anarchist âmilieuâ enough of a basis for the
kind of community demanded by these accountability strategies? Can we
realistically apply these models to our diffuse, fragmented, mostly
unstructured associations of misfits?
As we move through our lives navigating connections with friends,
neighbors, and comrades, weâre not just part of a single unitary
community, or even a web of multiple communities. Rather, our
relationships with others take the form of concentric circles of
affinity.From these, we can trace a tentative model to imagine how to
apply community accountability models to anarchist scenes.
One of the major flaws in our notion of anarchist community lies in its
nature as implicit and assumed, rather than explicit and articulated. We
donât often directly state our commitments to and expectations of the
other people with whom we share various kinds of âcommunity,â except in
specific projects or collectives; for instance, by living together,
housemates agree to pay bills on time, wash the dishes, and respect each
otherâs space. What if we extended that degree of explicit intention to
all of our relationships of affinity? Impossible: weâre supposed to sit
down with every anarchist in North Americaâor even just in our townâand
spell out explicit standards for how we relate and what we expect from
each other?
No, of course not⊠and thatâs exactly the point. We canât do that, so we
have to figure out how to collectively determine these things within the
different webs of relationships in our lives. Rather than presuming a
âcommunityâ and attempting to hold people accountable based on that
fiction, we should define our expectations of and commitments to the
others in our various circles of affinity, and use them as the basis for
our responses to conflict and harm.
For example, letâs say that as my innermost concentric circle I have my
affinity group. These are the folks I trust the most, with whom I take
risks and for whom Iâll do whatever it takes. Iâd be willing to give
these people the benefit of the doubt in resolving conflict and
addressing harm far more than any other people. Under this model, I
would sit down with my affinity group and preemptively discuss how to
address conflicts with each other when they come up, ranging from the
most minor to the most serious disputes and forms of harm. Think of it
as a sort of pre-nuptial agreement for friends and comrades, covering
the bases in case things should go wrong. That way, I have a clear sense
of how to respond when one of my crew does me wrong, and a shared basis
of trust for working with them in a potentially long-term process of
transformation. While I wouldnât extend that trust to most people,
within this group we share a deep and explicit affinity, so Iâll be open
to criticism, calling out, and transformation with the trust that my
comrades will be, too. Other examples of this innermost circle of
affinity might be families (birth or chosen), houses and land projects,
various types of collectives, or tight-knit groups of friends.
The next circle outwards might be a shared community space, such as an
infoshop or social center. Itâs a fairly consistent group of people,
some of whom Iâm closer with than others, but also an open space, so
folks may come that I donât know. Since itâs not a totally fixed group
and not every single person can or would settle on direct agreements
with one another, there can be collective agreements around respect,
consent, anti-oppression, use of resources, and such. These donât have
to be authoritarian; they can be collectively determined, revised at any
time by the consent of those most affected, and no one is compelled to
abide by them; folks who canât or wonât can choose not to participate in
the space. As a result, I would be willing to go along with trying to
hold someone accountable insofar as they wanted to continue to
participate in the space. Since what defines our âcommunityââthe terms
of our affinity with each otherâis our shared experience of
participation in the space, then if one of us ceases to participate in
it, weâre no longer in community with one another, thus shouldnât expect
to be held or hold others accountable through it. And accordingly, if
someone violates or refuses to abide by the collective standards,
thereâs a procedure in place by which someone can held accountable for
their actions; and if they refuse, others can exclude them from the
space in good conscience. Other examples of this second circle of
affinity could include specific events, larger organizing projects, and
folks who hang out loosely in shared social spaces.
This framework of concentric circles of affinity helps us imagine where
we can best apply the accountability practices with which weâve been
experimenting these past few years among anarchists. As the circles move
outwards to mass mobilizations, âanarchists,â âpunks,â and our broader
radical âcommunity,â itâs harder to imagine how we could concretely
define community and navigate accountability within it. Thereâs no
reason to expect anyone to be âaccountableâ to us based on whatever
abstraction we claim to share with them. Without a concrete basis, our
âcommunityâ has neither carrot nor stick; we canât reward people for
going along with our demands and we canât coerce them into doing so. So
if some random person whoâs supposedly an anarchist sexually assaults
someone, it might not be realistic to approach our response to the
situation in terms of community accountability.
So then what do we do? Call the cops, beat them up, kick them out of all
the institutions controlled by folks with whom we share affinity? And
how do we deal with the recurrent problem of people who leave one scene
only to resume abusive behavior in another? We donât have any clear
answers. But we have to start having discussions in every circle of
affinity about our terms of engagement and how to address harm and
resolve conflict, before weâre in crisis and forced to figure it out as
we go. Until weâve done that thoroughly in every collective, space,
social group, and other anarchist formation, we canât realistically
aspire to formal community accountability as a strategy for dealing with
our shit.
Forming affinity groups is a crucial part of anarchist organizing. It
can be as simple as pulling together a crew of friends to do an action,
or as formal and structured as you can imagine. Crucially, it preserves
the basic principle of voluntary association at the heart of anarchy,
the idea that we can do what we want with whomever we want without
coercion or bureaucracy. This simple process has formed the core of our
actions at demos and mobilizations, but perhaps we can use it to
conceptualize our entire anarchist community and milieu. If we can
create stronger ties with each other and understand our affinities more
concretely, perhaps weâll have the basis to make community
accountability something more than a vague and contentious dream.
We hope this essay will contribute to self-reflection among anarchists
about where our affinities really are. Perhaps we can address many of
the pitfalls of our experiments with accountability processes thus far
by making our expectations of and commitments to one another as explicit
as possible. We also can consider extending survivor-led vigilantism,
pursuing anti-sexist menâs groups and gender-based organizing to
undermine rape culture, or broadening our focus on conflict resolution
and mediation. Whatever paths we choose, anarchists must continue trying
whatever we can to break this impasse around abuse and assault in our
scenes. Our liberation depends on it.
Feminist Struggle
Dealing With Our Shit
Celeste, in Itâs Down To This: Reflections, Stories, Critiques,
Experiences, and Ideas on Community and Collective Response to Sexual
Violence, Abuse and Accountability
Collective
Color Against Violence
Communities, edited by Ching-In Chen, Jai Dulani, Leah Lakshmi
Piepzna-Samarasinha and Andrea Smith
Education Action
Collective Response to Sexual Violence and Accountability
Justice
Transformative Justice
Transforming Conflict and Harm
Transforming Violence
[1] Challenging banning and exclusion as primary accountability tactics
raises more thorny questions about how to evaluate survivor demands, not
just in terms of our ability to enact them but our willingness to do so.
Is our role as proponents of anarchist accountability simply to adhere
to the demands set forth by a survivor, even if we disagree with them
strategically or ethically? Being an ally can be defined as doing what
the survivor wants, no matter what; but we believe that no liberation
can result from suspending our autonomy and uncritically following
demands, no matter whose. Yet when is it our place as supporters to
criticize what a survivor claims they need to heal or feel safe?
[2] At times, people honestly trying to be accountable have left
anarchist scenes entirely in order to give space to a survivor. While
better than not cooperating, this subverts the transformative justice
ideal of keeping folks part of a community.
[3] One common challenge occurs when someone doesnât clearly remember
what happened in an encounter for which theyâve been called out, or
remembers the experience differently from how the person calling them
out remembers it. A survivor may assume that this is simply a ploy to
avoid responsibility, which is possible; but often, peopleâs memories
simply donât line up. If accountability processes are not
pseudo-judicial attempts to determine âthe truthâ of what âreally
happenedâ as confirmed by some authority, how can we reconcile these
differences? Do the memories of all parties have to match in order for
demands to be legitimate? Can someone take responsibility for doing
things they donât remember?
From our experience intervening with people whoâve been called out,
acknowledging that someone may experience reality differently from them
forms an important first step. For example, we can ask them to admit
that something they experienced as consensual may not have been
experienced that way by someone else. The sincere apology a survivor
seeks may not be forthcoming if the person theyâre calling out doesnât
remember an interaction in the same way. Still, accepting that the
other(s) may have felt violated by something that they did can open
someone towards examining and changing some of their behaviors, if not
taking full responsibility.
[4] Itâs difficult to acknowledge this without slipping into the kind of
minimizing and denying language thatâs so often used to silence
survivors. We donât want reactionaries to pick up on it and use it as
another weapon in their arsenal of denial: âTheyâre just power-tripping
on this âaccountabilityâ trend when that doesnât even apply to this
situation,â and so forth. Still, we need to be able to talk openly about
this to learn how to respond more effectively to assault and abuse.
[5] As a self-described perpetrator explains in a comment on âNotes on
Survivor Autonomy and Violenceâ: âIâm not saying that survivors have to
feel empathy for people who did them violence. But if weâre going to
build communities that can actually outsurvive patriarchy, instead of
being atomized and pummeled to dust by it, I think somebody will need to
have empathy for perpetrators. Speaking from my personal experience, I
know that I never would have had the courage to actually own up to my
shit and deal if I hadnât found a couple folks that actually cared about
me and found a way to show me empathy⊠And I donât think empathy means
making excuses for someone. In fact, in this context, I think it means
not letting someone make excuses, not letting them escape their
responsibility and their history, and making sure they own up to the
consequences that come from the actions theyâve taken. It also means
listening to them, sincerely, even while doing this, and seeking
understanding. And I believe it means making sure that perpetrators do
feel consequences for their actions, but not punishments. It also means
finding resources so that the perpetrator can first learn and then
practice a different pattern of habits and actions⊠I think what is
required for accountability processes is empathy. Empathy and anger, at
the same time.â
[6] Itâs worth asking whether or not âneutralityâ is possible or
desirable in conflict mediation. In many conflicts, one party wields
greater power than the other, and if effort isnât made to intervene in
that power dynamic, neutrality can often amount to collusion with power.
An alternative model of a mediatorâs orientation towards parties in a
conflict is âbipartialityâ rather than neutrality. According to this
framework, a mediator advocates for both parties, but also challenges
them when they leverage their access to power within the conflict,
asking them to consider the ways that their power blind them to the
experiences of those lacking that power.