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Title: Notes on Autonomy & Anarchism
Author: Andrea Castro
Date: 4/13/2019
Language: en
Topics: autonomy, ableism, Philippines, hierarchy, queer, climate change, people of color, Authoritarian Left, intersectionality, disability, horizontal organizing, nationalism, organization
Source: https://medium.com/@andreacastr0/notes-on-autonomy-anarchism-a77ed4add3b6

Andrea Castro

Notes on Autonomy & Anarchism

I identify as an autonomist leftist largely based on personal

experience. Autonomist can be used somewhat synonymously with anarchist

— I use the term because peoples’ conception of anarchy usually = total

chaos, which more often than not derails any further conversation about

it.

I was first introduced to Philippine nationalism when I was younger, but

I’ve moved away from primarily nationalist political spaces because of

constant authenticity checks, essentialism, and erasure of indigenous

peoples under state-enforced identity. I also was looking for ways to

speak — and resist — in more intersectional terms.

I’m a brown queer femme. I’m anti-imperialist, anti-state,

anti-patriarchy, prison abolitionist. I’m for third world liberation and

joint struggle. I’m 1.5 generation — all of these things mean that I am

constantly building my home in the margins.

I understand anarchism as a collective means of living/a form of

relationship that strives to be explicitly non-hierarchical and

anti-authoritarian in its decision-making processes.

Principles that I stick to are non-hierarchical collectivism — which

basically means that anyone can and should be able to plug in based on

their abilities and capacity. I’m about accessibility in organizing —

especially around disability and chronic illness. I’m not down with

strict leadership models that sacrifice those at the very bottom in

order to “advance” the revolution.

For me, anarchism involves a commitment to combat and challenge all

forms of oppression, an integration of communal care practices and

mutual aid + mutual investment, and creating spaces for people to be

their full selves (in a way that isn’t violent towards others) without

fear, shame, or threat to their existence.

My understanding is based a lot less on dead white guy theory and very

heavily on what type of organizing can include the parts of who I am.

The single biggest reason I began identifying as an autonomist is

because it made the most sense for me in terms of how I organize and

build with people. Anarchism + abolition are really about dismantling

all fucked up hierarchies and systems of oppression, which means I can

talk about all the parts of myself (sick brown queer femme) without

having to stick to what “the party” dictates.

I try not to make “real organizers are/do [x thing]” statements because

I don’t necessarily see a division between Organizers (with a capital O)

and everyone else. It feels like the same hierarchical distinction made

between Leaders and followers, and it also feels low-key ableist to

imply that some people stand at the forefront while everyone else just

takes orders.

I’m also really over the idea of leftist martyrdom “for the masses” — as

if we aren’t also part of the people trying to get free, trying to have

livable lives. None of us are exceptional or superhuman. We have no

obligation to run ourselves into the ground and self-sacrifice for the

sake of a movement that isn’t mutually invested in our own survival.

Differences Between Anarchism and Authoritarian Leftism

(Marxist-Leninist-Maoism)

A significant difference between anarchism and Marxist-Leninist-Maoism

is hierarchy. MLMs depend on cadres (leadership) to make the ultimate

decisions, which is why they often stick to a central message handed

down from the top. Anarchism is horizontal, which means having a lot of

intentional discussions around consensus and each person’s needs. MLM

organizing tends to be more oriented towards building critical mass and

numbers because they believe that the solution is to displace the

current state with a “people’s state” — a point that anarchists

fundamentally disagree with because we believe that states in any form

simply replicate the existing hierarchies of violence and systems of

oppression.

The tensions between anarchist and authoritarian leftist organizing also

often come down to questions of capacity, scale, structure, and urgency.

It’s often the case that authoritarian leftist organizing (in its many

variations) is willing to sidestep conversations on internal conflict

and will readily engage in disposability politics for the sake of

scaling up rapidly, at an unsustainable pace. Which is something I’m not

down with — because I am definitely one of the people (among many who

make up my community) who gets left behind over and over again due to

chronic illness, precariousness, limited access to resources, etc. But

it’s tougher to build a large group with anarchism because of

decentralization — with the intent that the focus is on meaningful

relationships and not burn out or exclusion.

What is a “movement” between billions of people who don’t know or have

any deep investment in each other? Another frustrating part of focusing

on mass movements is that the more that people push for critical mass,

the less considerate they are of pace — and the less attention they pay

to who they leave behind in the process of growing, growing, growing.

I believe that small and committed groups of people can do big things if

they want to. I don’t think we need to change everyone’s mind. I think

that change happens all the time, on the ground, in relationship, at a

scale that people don’t/won’t take notice of because they are too busy

looking elsewhere.

I believe that small and committed groups of people can do big things if

they want to. I don’t think we need to change everyone’s mind. I think

that change happens all the time, on the ground, in relationship, at a

scale that people don’t/won’t take notice of because they are too busy

looking elsewhere.

At the same time, we are still working on how to organize autonomously

in ways that are resilient and lasting. It seems like anarchist

organizing, while more forgiving and flexible, is also far more

susceptible to disintegration when hard-line demand for consistency

isn’t made. And yet autonomous spaces are the ones where I have felt the

most whole, and where my needs and limitations have been taken

seriously.

What does all of this mean in the face of urgency?

How do we prepare for intensified state violence and scarcity without

pre-emptively committing ourselves to the idea that we have to lose and

sacrifice people along the way? (And who gets to choose who is left

behind or sacrificed?)

Urgency, first and foremost, brings up questions of scale, and

recruiting rapidly to meet or exceed critical mass. To me this

immediately sounds like a quick way to replicate a lot of toxic

situations full of distrust, and people taking out their unprocessed

pain on each other. We carry a lot of trauma and we also bring that into

the spaces that we organize in. I really appreciate the phrase “move at

the speed of trust” — which involves growing and tending to each

individual relationship I have with friends and comrades. And that can

feel excruciatingly slow in its own way.

I am trying to understand how we build movements and collectives that

are prepared for long-term resistance — without just leaving the weakest

and most vulnerable behind to fend for themselves. It can be depleting,

though. The feeling of failure, of having to hit the reset button over

and over in spite of different sorts of fragmentation and barriers can

be daunting and is one of the bigger causes of my depression and

isolation. But it’s the work of collective survival for those of us who

still believe in the possibility of life. I’ve thought of it for a long

time as intentionally, carefully carving out spaces for ourselves in the

margins — I inhabit so many in-betweens, and I’ve also found so many

others here.

What does it take to maintain a uniform political line for so long? Who

is erased? Who is made invisible?

What would it look like to slow the pace of organizing so that people

aren’t left behind because they can’t physically, emotionally, or

materially keep up?

We are surrounded by crises but is it still possible to respond with

deliberation? To take (or free) more time? To make demands through rest

instead of rushing to produce?

What if we think of urgency as a constant instead of as an emptying

hourglass? (Related: what if we didn’t see climate change as the end of

our species but as something to still prepare for, as a reason to build

tools for future generations to be able to move through?)

Who is liberation for if only the fittest make it to the finish line?