gemini - kennedy.gemi.dev

💾 Archived View for gemini.spam.works › mirrors › textfiles › humor › rent-a_cat captured on 2023-01-29 at 08:36:52.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-
BABYL OPTIONS:
Version:5
Append

1, recent,,

	** EOOH ***

Date: 18 Jul 1980 10:28 PDT
From: bott at PARC-MAXC
To:   SAD at SRI-KL, McGreal at SRI-KL, Cower at SRI-KL
Re:   All about cats
Remailed-date: 18 Jul 1980 1041-PDT
Remailed-from: SAD
Remailed-to: Netsw
Remailed-date: 18 Jul 1980 1108-PDT
Remailed-from: NETSW
Remailed-to: BBoard
Remailed-date: 19 Jul 1980 0349-PDT
Remailed-from: Scott J. Kramer <Scott at SRI-KL>
Remailed-to: kmp at MC

FYI

------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 17 Jul 1980 7:35 pm PDT (Thursday)
From: Woods.PA
Subject: Rend a cat?
To: Junk^

You may remember Will's message last week, asking about borrowing a cat for a
few days.  I decided to forward it to the bulletin boards at SAIL and SCORE, in
case anyone there could help.  Several people at SAIL have responded, but none
of the responses has anything to do with getting poor Will a cat . . .

------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 9 Jul 1980 4:36 pm PDT (Wednesday)
Sender: Woods at PARC-MAXC
From: CROWTHER at PARC
Subject: Rent a Cat
To:   BBOARD at SAIL, BBOARD at SCORE (forwarded from Junk^)

I would like to acquire a cat.

But, there is a strong chance that I am allergic to cat hair.

So, I would like to try living with cat for 3 or 4 days, to see whether
it is possible.

If you have a cat, and could use a cat sitter for a few days, send me a
message and perhaps we can work something out.  The cat would get lots
of attention and loving care - we have 4 kids, the youngest being seven.

Will Crowther


ROD - and if you have any iguanas send RPG a message - he has a cattle prod.

rpg - Hey, I'm booked solid on those iguanas, so hold off for a week or so.
And not only do I have a cattle prod, I know how to use it.

wls - Although without a working sprinkler system I don't see the point.
Still it's amazing what room service will send up if you tip them enough.

BTH - Sure, why not?  But doesn't installing the audio switch take priority
over things like this?
 
ROD - Who needs an audio switch when you've got iguanas and a cattle prod?
Are you some kind of prevert BTH?

wls - That's right, we need to take care of essential things first.
Without these items on hand, we're all doomed.

BTH - I could understand having iguanas, a cattle prod, and a jar
of peanut butter.  But without the peanut butter---that is perversion!

DON - I think all this discussion is nonsense.  If people have very valuable
core images, then they should save them before going away.  The autologout
feature is designed to avoid irresponsible use of scarce resources.

SIM - I don't have a cat.

wls - You people don't seem to understand what's at stake here.  This
is a serious matter.   Besides, I think 75lbs should be adequate, 
at least for the front.

DON - I thought staked cats were measured in footpounds per manhour per
degree Celsius.

rpg - You fail to understand that the important point is that it's
tight as a snare drum and hard as teak.

wls - Of course, not to mention that it turns corners in a very
stylish manner!!!

RSP - And you ought to put the 75lbs in back for better traction.

KS - Couldn't we jury-rig the cat to act as an audio switch, and have it
yell at people to save their core images before logging them out?  I'm sure
the cattle prod would be effective in this regard.  In any case, a traverse
mounted iguana, while more perverted, gives better traction than 75lbs.

DON - I should think that attempting to do anything with a 75-pound
iguana, perverted or not, would be enough to put anyone in traction!

KS - I demand a retraction of that last comment!  The invidious attempt to
insinuate that 75lb iguanas are, in fact, perverted is a clear perversion
of my obvious intent.  Why does no one read the users manual seriously?!

BTH - I think all this discussion is nonsense.  If people have very valuable
iguanas, then they should save them before going away.  The autologout
feature is designed to avoid irresponsible use of cattle prods.

SEH - I agree with BTH.  However, If people have very valuable cattle prods,
they should put THEM away, as the autologout feature is designed to program
the perverted 75lb iguanas crazy, unless they eat the audio switch.