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POSITION AVAILABLE
IMBECILE
An entry level position exists for a complete and total
blithering idiot who possesses a demonstrable ability to
tolerate the ravages of several other complete and total
blithering idiots and can apply a definite lack of interest
combined with a certain social numbness and indifference to
an otherwise intolerable situation, entirely for the purpose
of assuring the personal object of job securety.
The position would also require the qualified imbecile to
participate in other absurd, incredulous and inept
activities solely for the purpose of screwing over other
fellow imbeciles. Such activities are required to stem from
a self-centered mindless paranoia that others may appear
just a tad better in any of several thousand different and
equally petty ways, many of which lie far below being of any
significance whatsoever.
The ability to forget all of the atrocities committed on
any one day, while being wholly capable of starting out on
the wrong foot at the beginning of each new day is a
definite plus.
Wages shall be entirely disproportionate with knowledge,
skill, rationality, consciousness, reason or anything else
even remotely resembling intelligence.
LTOEOE (Less Than Our Equal, Opportunity Employer)
Candidates must possess a magnified limbic disorder and
as nearly as possible, a totally atrophied neo-cortex.
We know you're out there!
So do it! Apply today! It's in your genes!