💾 Archived View for hankprince.smol.pub › 10_frank_and_zoe captured on 2022-07-16 at 13:48:54. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
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"Every citizen is allowed to mine their own crypto. Gas prices never go above two dollars. All sexualities are allowed, as long as they're not straight."
"What else goes into the New Bill of Rights? And we've finally agreed on that name, right? Bill of Rights 2.0, according to our digital marketing research, just sounds like an idea from ten years ago."
"Libertartius? Is that your phone ringing?"
"Nope."
Frank was in the middle of a meeting with two other masked comrades, discussing the new constitution of their future state over Signal PC, when he received a voice call on his monthly burner cell. As soon as he saw who it was from, he wanted to answer, but this was a remote meeting with the other members of his alt-right militia, the New Cascadian Order. He couldn't just abandon his duty to the Cascadians of the future! Not even for this caller, important as she was to Frank's future success as a multimedia mogul.
But, if his connection were to suddenly drop, nobody could fault him for it.
Frank's left foot reached for the cable that kept his PC connected to the internet. With a slight pinch and a tug, his video call was suddenly quiet. Frank grabbed his burner and flipped it open. This caller was one of the few people he felt he could trust. Frank's cousin, Zoe Casanova.
Frank said, "You've got five minutes. I was in a meeting, but a technical difficulty took me offline."
Zoe said, "LARPing again?"
"Beginning the revolution!"
"How the hell are you losers going to start a revolution when you can't even agree on who 'started' your 'movement'?" Zoe drew out the vowels in the words 'started' and 'movement', sarcasm slow and unsubtle.
"Some day, I'll be the leader of the entire bioregion. History is written by the victors!"
"Uh huh. Anyway. What's your phone number going to be next month?"
Frank looked at his list of phone numbers. He used to actually get a new burner phone every month, but after no secret agents silenced him after two years of getting a new burner every month, decided to simply rotate through a list of twelve numbers.
"555-FAKE-YOU."
"Ha. Well, that won't really matter anymore, because, cuz, I'm staying with you."
"What?"
"Don't you watch the news? Paradise burned down."
"The news is fake. I saw a post on Readit of someone filming a big-ass fire, supposedly in California, though. Shit. It really happened? That wasn't CGI?"
Zoe sighed. "Yeah, cuz."
Frank squeezed the left arm on his gaming chair. The Illuminati went too far this time with their weather control satellites! Frank, if he was ever going to blackmail his way into their ranks, could possibly use Zoe as leverage. But, he still had to play it cool.
"That sucks. What's that got to do with me?"
"You owe me. I helped you get your Beast Brew sponsorship, remember? And you need it as cover for your other activities."
Both of those statements were true. Frank liked how Zoe didn't bother with an emotional appeal or breakdown. Even in the face of disaster, she was practical. But, there was a more practical reason that Frank's cousin couldn't stay over.
"I've already got another roommate. Guy drinks a lot and never shuts up about the 80's."
Zoe laughed. "I'm sure the three of us will get along fine! I remember when I visited, when you were first moving in. You've got space. Enough room for a mattress and right next to the wi-fi."
Zoe had a keen memory. There was, in fact, an extra cavity in the ceiling of Frank's apartment. Not quite a loft or an attic, this space was originally created by the building's owner in the 1940s to stash their collection of various objects. It was just small enough to fit a mattress, and there was a small hole that allowed for ventilation.
Frank stroked his beard. "I'll call you after I'm done discussing revolutionary things with my members." The two said their goodbyes and hanged up.