💾 Archived View for gemini.spam.works › mirrors › textfiles › messages › ALTERREALITY › ar05.txt captured on 2022-06-12 at 15:38:55.

View Raw

More Information

-=-=-=-=-=-=-

From: TURTLE              
To: CORWYN OF AMBER     
Subject: Life           
Date & Time: 12/08/89 21:23:33
Message Number   801

Naah, Life consists primarily of four parts:
Fast cars
Fast computers
Sex
Loud music
 
There are a few other things worth mentioning about Life, like, say,
money, more sex, and Mountain Dew, but those are the big four.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: ROCKY               
Subject: movies...      
Date & Time: 12/08/89 21:30:09
Message Number   802

Hmm. I've seen Phantasm //, but never Phantasm. The biggest thing I
remember about Phantasm // was the silver balls that flew around killing
people, and the way they blew up a beautiful mint-condition 1967
Hemi 'Cuda. It was the most obscene thing I've ever seen--when that
beautiful car went up in flames, I wanted to cry. There should be a
law against things like that.
                --A speed-loving Turtle
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: ROCKY               
Subject: GameCon        
Date & Time: 12/08/89 21:32:44
Message Number   803

Quarters isn't really as much fun as Mexican...a somewhat obscure and
more complex drinking game played with two six-sided dice. It's kind of
like Liar's Poker, only with dice instead of cards, and it's a whole lot
more fun.
               --A gaming-enthusiast Turtle
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: ROCKY               
Subject: BTW....        
Date & Time: 12/08/89 21:34:30
Message Number   804

Okay, okay, I'll bite. (And no, I'm not a snapping turtle!) Turtle
is, of course, unique, but most closely resembles a large, anthro-
pomorphic version of a Southeast Asian wood turtle. He's brown and
orange, with orange highlights on his shell. And he is, naturally, a
hard-rock Turtle (a particular sub-species of Turtle, you understand,
which is kind of silly since Turtle's species has no other members and
he is therefore not only unique, but a unique sub-species of his own
species as well...Never mind.)
       --A hard-rocking fast-driving one-of-a-kind Turtle!!
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: ROCKY               
Subject: Yarg! Yarg!    
Date & Time: 12/08/89 21:39:48
Message Number   805

Yarg! Yarg! is a shorthand way of saying "Please consider the preceeding
statements to have been made with tongue in cheek, and therefore kindly
do not take the aforementioned statements excessively seriously, as they
are presented for your amusement only and do not necessarily reflect the
opinions, attitudes, or beliefs of the person making them, or reality,
for that matter."
===========

From: QTIP                
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Life           
Date & Time: 12/08/89 22:28:42
Message Number   806

tURTLE,     You forgot BOATS.. and why can'"Mt {_Iback up w
with this thing--- NO REVERSE????????Gads. How uncontrolable.
All mistakes are hopeless!Yikes. Its another one way 
line by line mono-directional TRAP!  You toitle !
===========

From: QTIP                
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Chat           
Date & Time: 12/08/89 22:47:46
Message Number   807

Great.  I'll see what I can find and try to upload a couple of zipped pr
programs that I enjoy.   Gee, we'll hav e   to get you auto warp for 
Christmas!!
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: ROCKY               
Subject: Phantasm       
Date & Time: 12/08/89 23:52:39
Message Number   808

  I don't think you realize whaat  the special FX teams do to make those
balls seem to fly. Am I the only one here that actually KNOWS what these
FX people go through? Whew, where do I begin?
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: ROCKY               
Subject: GameCon        
Date & Time: 12/08/89 23:57:55
Message Number   809

  Pente is a game this archdemon almost remembers...
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: ROCKY               
Subject: Drunk          
Date & Time: 12/08/89 23:59:04
Message Number   810

  I wouldn't dare drink too much, I get very violent when I'm drunk.
(got that from my long-dead alcoholic father)
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: ROCKY               
Subject: movies...      
Date & Time: 12/09/89 01:08:39
Message Number   812

One of my favorites from Heavy Metal was the one where the secretary is
"kidnapped."  I laughed my head off at the whole thing.
"If it's one thing I know how to do, it's drive when I'm stoned."
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: ROCKY               
Subject: My Brother?    
Date & Time: 12/09/89 01:11:19
Message Number   813

You know what I'd like to see with the Trumps?  GTE Services.  Like 
Trump Waiting
Trump Forwarding
and of course, an answering Trump "Sorry, but Corwin is not available at
this time, but if you'd like to leave a message, he will get back to you
as soon as possible.  Don't hold your breath."  BEEP
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: Phantasm       
Date & Time: 12/09/89 01:15:16
Message Number   814

Do you know how much work a beaver does to build a damn?  First they 
have to decide where to put the damn.  Next they form commitees on what
the enviromental impact will be, what the benefits will be, etc..etc..
Next they have to secure a building permit from the 'Beaver Builders of
America', then they build.  First they have to get the raw materials.  
They either have to gnaw down trees and other items, or they learn 
to drive, and go down to Home Depot and buy the stuff.  But do you know
the kinda looks beavers get when they ask "Scuse me sir, where's the
cement at?  Oh yea, we need a chain saw, and a few dozen 2 x 4s"  
Anyways, once they get the materials, they have to build.  This means
they gotta put up safety nets, deal with unions, vacations, and 
sometimes a strike or two.  And once it is built, they have to dedicate
it to someone.  Since "The Jerry Mathers Memorial Damn" has been used
about 40 times, they have to really think of a good name.  After it's
been built and named, they have to have the ribbon cutting ceremony.
Unfortunatly(sp?), they can't use scissors to well, so they gnaw the
ribbon, which is usually plastic, so they ingest the plastic, and die!
 
Turtle, how'z that??  I gotta work on my Turtle posts and timed writings
===========

From: CYBERPUNK           
To: BEATLE              
Subject: ChristmasCon   
Date & Time: 12/09/89 07:16:05
Message Number   816

well, hummm, it's not really planned out yet, but i would have some 
animated cartoon features like Robotech II:The Sentinels, and Captain
Harloc. and I would teach who ever wanted to play the Robotech game on 
Tylers board how to do it.. and a whole lot of other things, like humm..
we would hide Rufus's prt rubber chicken etc..  hehehe just jokin' Rufus
!! heheh but it would be like RufusCon kinda, a whole bunch of computer
freaks trying to have fun!! hehehe
 Cy
===========

From: CYBERPUNK           
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: ChristmasCon   
Date & Time: 12/09/89 07:22:15
Message Number   817

well, ya, that's what will happen, we will have a homemade bomb contest
and instead of a rudabega, we would have my IBM!! hehehehe  NOT! but we
would have animation stuff and such forth... okie dokie>
?
Cy
===========

From: CYBERPUNK           
To: KALI                
Subject: What? An Indoor
Date & Time: 12/09/89 07:26:03
Message Number   818

how about Club Mary??  hehehehe
 Cy
===========

From: CYBERPUNK           
To: ROCKY               
Subject: BTW....        
Date & Time: 12/09/89 07:29:30
Message Number   819

he's a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle  hehehe
 Cy
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: CYBERPUNK           
Subject: ChristmasCon   
Date & Time: 12/09/89 11:55:02
Message Number   821

Listen, no one touches the rubber chicken without my permision (sp? Arg
my head is clogged up, and my brain is running like a ZX-81 ).  But
he could use a good stretch, he's been watching the computer for the pas
week.
===========

From: PSYCHE              
To: ROCKY               
Subject: GameCon        
Date & Time: 12/09/89 13:01:47
Message Number   822

   Yeah, I have played, and still do play occasionally, Pente.  It's
really a fun game, but since I have not played it enough to get good
at it, I tend to look for something else to play after I lose the first 
game.  But it's a possibility...
===========

From: SAURON              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Bah!           
Date & Time: 12/09/89 14:01:26
Message Number   823

  Precisely!
===========

From: SAURON              
To: CORWYN OF AMBER     
Subject: catchy slogans 
Date & Time: 12/09/89 14:02:24
Message Number   824

  Catchy slogans?  What shall we say then about"pro-choice"?  Shall we
extend the "choice" to one hour before the end of the second trimester?
...or maybe one hour after birth? When-precisely??
  This whole debate has become so pointless, I see no gain to be made by
continuing it. Neither side is going to flex an inch, and until we can 
eliminate all the forked-tongue rhetoric, euphisms, and hypocrisy,
that's how it will remain.
===========

From: SAURON              
To: CRYSTAL             
Subject: Used Cars      
Date & Time: 12/09/89 14:11:12
Message Number   825

  I absolutely agree!  Hysterical.  Kurt Russell is an under-rated
talent.
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: CYBERPUNK           
Subject: ChristmasCon   
Date & Time: 12/09/89 17:25:55
Message Number   827

  If you hve it at my house, you'll have an AAmiga 2000 and walls 
covered with pictures of gory death and beautiful women...
 
  You people'd like my house...
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: ROCKY               
Subject: My Brother?    
Date & Time: 12/09/89 18:19:20
Message Number   828

Yep.. You may have to paint yourself a new trump to get a hold of me,
  (it might have 359-1717 in a corner somewhere) As I am trying to
contact Oberon between 5:00 and 11:00 please don't interrupt my 
concentration then, he's out there somewhere! I shall return to the 
courts of chaos if it is possible some time in the near future, but of 
course as time flows more slowly here.. it may seem a while to you. The
best bet is to trump me directly.. try it soon..
                  - Corwin
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Life           
Date & Time: 12/09/89 18:25:02
Message Number   829

Fast cars: an extra
Fast computers: assumed
sex =   (sex) cookies & Rock 'n Roll
Loud music = sex, cookies and (Rock 'n Roll)
 
   Sex is first... (implying your more sex addition..) 
   Cookies has sometimes been modified to include pizza.. but
      this ruins the rythm.
   Mountain Dew.. OK I left something out...
 
      - Corwyn (Known in some shadows as Confucious [aka Confuse-us])
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: RUFUS               
Subject: My Brother?    
Date & Time: 12/09/89 18:32:48
Message Number   830

Talk to Ghostwheel... Your freindly local trump equipped computer 
switchboard.
                     - Corwyn
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: SAURON              
Subject: catchy slogans 
Date & Time: 12/09/89 18:35:36
Message Number   831

I HATE THAT ANSWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
 Let's see: "We're having trouble with our terms, so let's not talk
about it anymore."
 
     Or: "We're not going to convince each other.. so let's stop talking
about it."
 
 How many real discussions would continue if everyone took this position
I'm sorry if you're so close minded that you don't think anyone else's 
argument will ever affect you.. I don't see how anyone can ever be that
sure of themselves.. (I call it smug self-confidence that you are OF 
COURSE absolutely correct.) 
 
                   - Corwyn
===========

From: CYBERPUNK           
To: RUFUS               
Subject: ChristmasCon   
Date & Time: 12/09/89 20:08:33
Message Number   832

hey, it's ok, don't make you head explode now!!  ack! i was just joking!
no!, dont'!!!  aagggrrghjjj   *BLAM*    hehehehhee
 CY
===========

From: CYBERPUNK           
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: ChristmasCon   
Date & Time: 12/09/89 20:10:40
Message Number   833

ya, sounds like an interesting place, well, i dunno, whatever
 *BURP*  x cuse me ! 
 CY
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: HMMMM               
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/09/89 22:24:20
Message Number   834

  Love: When spring is in the air and it's dead winter.
 
             An Archdemon with someone he'd die for if she asked,
                                        Spellwind
 (P.S. The books on postpont for now...wow)
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: QTIP                
Subject: Life           
Date & Time: 12/10/89 03:20:02
Message Number   835

>...You forgot BOATS...
 
No, not really. Boats (unless they're /really fast,/ like, say, Scarabs
or Checkmates) rank right up there with studying wall charts of
tonsils for excitement. (Although I did get the unique experience of
riding in a Checkmate at about 70 miles per driven by the capable,
if reckless, insane, and demented, hands of a friend of mine once...I
almost wet my pants.) For the necessities of life, boats rank right
after disposable cameras but right before rubber chickens.
                   --A dry-land Turtle
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: QTIP                
Subject: Chat           
Date & Time: 12/10/89 03:23:52
Message Number   836

>...we'll have to get you auto warp for Christmas!!
 
No thanks, I'm quite warped enough already!
                 --A   rp   Turtle
                      a  e
                     w    d
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: Drunk          
Date & Time: 12/10/89 03:25:29
Message Number   837

>...I get very violent when I'm drunk.
 
Gosh, and I only get...well, like I am, only more so. Hmm...
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Beavers        
Date & Time: 12/10/89 03:26:20
Message Number   838

Well, you're getting there, kid. Admittedly, I'm not quite sure what
you'll do when you actually *do* arrive...possibly set up a nice cafe,
with pastel-colored curtains in the windows and a small, patient child
who tries inexorably to remove the cat's tail (which isn't really a
problem if it's a reasonably patient cat, or one that believes in
turnabout as fair play, considering how often it has the small child's
tongue (which is to say, often enough that he is unable to respond when
his teacher asks him a question (no that that's any great loss or any-
thing, seeing how they're usually fairly pointless questions (like
"Who invented America?" and "If you had ten fingers, and you put them
in a mailbox, then how much postage would a penguin require to fly to
last Tuesday?" (you see, drug abuse by professional instructors of
young and budding minds is a sadly neglected crisis in this country
(as is the ever-growing menace of imported "Buy American" bumper
stickers))))) and cause her to believe she's ignoring him (which he
really is, but that's beside the point) and send him to the principal's
office)), and maybe some nice potted plants.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CORWYN OF AMBER     
Subject: Life           
Date & Time: 12/10/89 03:38:50
Message Number   839

Confucious say...too damn much.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/10/89 03:39:43
Message Number   840

Love: A grave mental illness.
      --Plato
Love: The wonderful period between meeting the most beautiful woman in
the world and finding out she looks like a haddock.
      --Ambrose Bierce
Love: A bloody pain in the ass.
      --Robert Byrne
 
Survey says...
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: TURTLE              
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/10/89 05:46:02
Message Number   841

   I feel NO pain..
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: >                   
Subject: Anything Goes  
Date & Time: 12/10/89 05:47:46
Message Number   842

 
 
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: Anything Goes  
Date & Time: 12/10/89 13:09:39
Message Number   843

Come again? I didn't quite catch that.
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: PSYCHE              
Subject: WHY?           
Date & Time: 12/10/89 15:09:54
Message Number   844

  I do! and the problem is that I need good grades in high school or my
parents will kill me!
===========

From: BEATLE              
To: TURTLE              
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/10/89 15:19:48
Message Number   845

  I would choose #3, then #1, and then #2...
  It definetely is a pain in the ass...
===========

From: DONTHEN             
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/10/89 16:30:10
Message Number   846

> I feel NO pain..
 
Well, it's about time you start.  Are you sure you're doing it properly?
Whoops, what are we talking about again?  Never mind.
===========

From: DONTHEN             
To: ALL                 
Subject: Executive 10/78
Date & Time: 12/10/89 16:33:40
Message Number   847

I am typing this message on a bizarre terminal called the Executive
10/78.  I'm not really sure what good the thing is, mind you, especially
seeing as how the backspace key doesn't really work and I have to use
ALT-H to backspace.  Not ^H, you say?  No, ALT-H.  The other thing is,
well, the damn thing has a 3278 keyboard layout and it's an incredible
pain in the butt to type on, seeing as how the ENTER key is down by the
spacebar, the exact same way the LUIS terminals at New College are
arranged.  In fact, this keyboard /is/ the same as the ones that the
LUIS terminals use; in fact, it has the same little dorky ruler line
at the bottom of the screen that lights up with little arrows and stuff
when you press different buttons.  Out in the car I have another
terminal just like this one, except that it's a 5271 terminal instead of
a 3278 terminal.
   GODS, why did IBM make such a stupid keyboard arrangement?  This is
an incredibly nice terminal that has been rendered effectively useless
to me because of the layout it uses.  AAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!
 
   ..so, anybody want to buy it?
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: THE WORLD           
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/10/89 17:00:59
Message Number   849

  I sat up last night listening to Neil Diamond...
       something is going on...
===========

From: CYBERPUNK           
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/10/89 17:10:30
Message Number   850

i think you might be sick Spellwind, why dont you stay home from school
tommorow....  hehehe
 Cy
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Life           
Date & Time: 12/10/89 17:33:28
Message Number   851

A nicely laid out 28' Morgan w/ a diesel and two kegs of beer are 
extremely pleasant companions, well OK, not as pleasant as the six or
eight girls which also belong aboard.. add an autopilot, new sails.. 
(What I'm missing.. besides the girls currently) and you're ready for a
quite pleasant, and enjoyable afternoon sail... Try sailing sometime..
just be sure you don't forget.. they're a necessary part of the laid 
back sailing experience... Now when you're on a Hobie.. (or a J24 for
that matter.. the girl better also be a damn good sailor.. or "Wench 
overboard!" ..
                    - Corwyn (Pleasantly Remeniscing)
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Beavers        
Date & Time: 12/10/89 17:40:10
Message Number   852

NO MORE PARENTHESES.. if you must nest them, at least alternate ({[,s I
have this irresistible urge to match each parenthese and I /don't/ like 
it! Stop it!
                          - Corwyn
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/10/89 17:42:53
Message Number   853

You know you're in love when:
 
 "You finish tossing off, and you /still/ think you love her."
           - Some lame brained baseball player
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Present!       
Date & Time: 12/10/89 19:58:38
Message Number   855

   Hi! We wanted to drop off a slightly early Christmas present,
but nobody was home. We kept calling to try to drop it off, but
nobody answered. Are you mad at me?
   I assure you -- the present will give you another religious 
experience.
                  Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CYBERPUNK           
To: ALL                 
Subject: bbs            
Date & Time: 12/10/89 20:42:25
Message Number   856

hi all, i finally got my BBS functional, all i need is a phone line,
 but when i get it, Cyberpunk's Fantasy World will be up for the public!
Featuring: Cyberpunks Fantasy Lounge; The Turtle Zone; Tylers Sex 
Emporuim, and more!!!  so if you wan this BBS to get up faster, send 
donations payable to 
Charles Mays 
send them to 
Charlie Mays
6950 Jarvis Rd.
Sarasota, Fl.
34241
 
Thanks!
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: CYBERPUNK           
Subject: bbs            
Date & Time: 12/10/89 22:34:47
Message Number   857

I'll donate my lunch from Friday.  Actually Cy, I just purchased a 
10 meg HD, so I is broke, in fact, I'm in the red.  But hey, it's
so much fun being broke..try it.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: ALL                 
Subject: auctions       
Date & Time: 12/10/89 22:36:01
Message Number   858

If you happen to be at an auction and see Chip P. Unicorn or Raven, run
for your life.  Don't look back, don't even say hello, just run.
"Does your van always feel like it's draggin a 1/2 ton?"
        -Raven
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: CYBERPUNK           
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/10/89 23:07:57
Message Number   859

  I don't go to school, Cyb. I'm 18.
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: CYB                 
Subject: Jarvis Rd.     
Date & Time: 12/10/89 23:11:58
Message Number   860

 Lake Sarasota???
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: in Ham Center..
Date & Time: 12/11/89 00:31:33
Message Number   861

.. A DEC mainframe.. do you know what the hell it's doing there...
 Just figured you'd be the guy to ask.
                     - Corywn (Much into brevity these days, isn't he?)
===========

From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Zap!           
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:20:24
Message Number   864

Sounds like a project for next time, eh?
Anyway, I'm goin' up to the Great White North until the 29th, so I'll
B C N U
                                                         -- Fox
===========

From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX     
To: ROCKY               
Subject: animation      
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:25:00
Message Number   865

As for 101 Dalmations, I have a very VERY bad tape of that... almost
gives you a headache to watch.  I'm waiting to see The Fox and the Hound
come out on videotape (letterboxed, I hope, but doubt).
 
Have you seen Rock 'n' Rule?  The Demon sequence was animated by the
same people that did some of the work on The Wall.  It has some really
incredible effects that can trick you into thinking you're looking at
a photographed scene (uhm... well, I mean by using video camera effects
like lens flare and limited depth of field, it seems like you're watchin
a live action film).
===========

From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX     
To: BEATLE              
Subject: Disney Releases
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:28:22
Message Number   866

I really don't think Fantasia will ever make it to videotape, but then
again, I'd never have thought Bambi would go on tape, but hey... money
changes attitudes.  Mitch brought Jungle Book to the Necronomicon's
FurryParty, but forgot about it until about 3am when people were packing
it in.  I'd figure we'll see Peter Pan or Snow White out next... they
seem to go for what will sell the most (making me think The Fox and the
Hound won't be out for some time).
===========

From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Rock 'n' Rule  
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:31:49
Message Number   867

Some of the photographic-type effects can be found in Don Bluth films
and Disney films, although interestingly enough, only in the intros...
not in the body of the film.  You know, the infinate depth of field
never struck me until I saw Rock 'n' Rule.
 
I still get a kick out of the animated lens flare in the into to the
first two seasons of Star Trek: The Next Generation...
===========

From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX     
To: CORWYN OF AMBER     
Subject: Wizard         
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:34:27
Message Number   868

That's not the new feature-length Nintendo comercial, is it?  (grin)
I don't recognise the title...
===========

From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX     
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Beaver Dam     
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:39:22
Message Number   869

Biuld a "damn"?  Hmm....
 
Anyway, look for a book called "The Cold Moons" by Aeron Clement.
Really good... and somewhat furry.
===========

From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Beavers        
Date & Time: 12/11/89 01:41:20
Message Number   870

I kinda felt like I was reading a LISP program...
 
I like the imported "Buy American" bumper stickers, though. (grin)
===========

From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX     
To: YOU PEOPLE/CRITTERS 
Subject: The Season     
Date & Time: 12/11/89 02:12:51
Message Number   871

Welp, I'm off to Ohio to experience that magnificent fable known as a
"White Christmas."  I wish you all a happy Chanuka, a merry Christmas,
and/or whatever it is you celebrate this time of year.  And in case I
don't make it back before the next century, have a happy and furry new
year.  Or, as Juan Alfonso put it yesterday on the phone, "<snort> Er...
and have a Furry Nude Rear!"  Later, all...
                                                          Yip!
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/11/89 03:12:50
Message Number   873

>I sat up late night listening to Neil Diamond...
>     something is going on...
 
Yeah, you're losing your taste in music.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CORWYN OF AMBER     
Subject: Life           
Date & Time: 12/11/89 03:14:07
Message Number   874

I /have/ tried the sailing thang. I used to own a little Sunfish, and
I used to go Hobie Catting frequently and sailing on a 25 footer less
frequently. Notice the past tense. Sailing is boring. B O R I N G .
If I wanted R&R that was about as exciting as watching grass grow, I'd
stay home and watch grass grow; it's less expensive. I happen to /like/
excitement, adventure, and really wild things. My idea of a good time
is trying to keep a VW Bug in a flat spin from flying over a steep
embankment into a canal whilst ripping along at about 60 or so in the
dead of night. Now THAT takes skill, or else it's... BUG OVERBOARD!
                     --An exciting, adventurous, and really wild Turtle
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CORWYN OF AMBER     
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/11/89 03:18:54
Message Number   875

You know you're in love when you walk down a hallway and step into an
elevator that isn't there, and plummet down the shaft to land in an
undignified manner upon a maintenance worker, who mistakes you for
Jesus Christ instead of a cuncussion (which would probably be a more
logical guess) and immediately tries to hand you all his money like
the nice preacher on TV told him to do, and in his haste dislodges the
small grenade in his pocket, which falls to the floor and rolls away to
find somewhere greener to be, and comes to rest on the dog, which it
promptly blows up, and you respond "Yes, I believe I will have a danish
with that today" and wander out of the shaft in a blissed-out haze,
totally unaware that your pants are still hanging from the edge of the
elevator door twelve floors above you--at least until you try to put
the lollipop in your pocket and discover it isn't there.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CHIP P. UNICORN     
Subject: Present!       
Date & Time: 12/11/89 03:26:35
Message Number   876

Well, I've just returned from visiting Cindy in Ft. Myers (and watching
"Black Rain"--a worthwhile flick), so that explains why I wasn't around.
I'm afraid I can't accept anything which may lead to another religious
experience, though--I've had three so far this week, and my doctor's
getting annoyed with me...
                       --A holy Turtle
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CORWYN OF AMBER     
Subject: in Ham Center..
Date & Time: 12/11/89 03:30:01
Message Number   877

What would I know about a DEC mainframe in Ham Center? I've been in Ft.
Myers this weekend!! Actually, I suspect Raven, Chip, and Rufus may be
the people to ask about this one...I just hope it doesn't end up
migrating over here like the last one did. (I still want to find an
operating system for the PDP in the utility room, it'd be so nice to
have a PC with some /real/ processing power...)
===========

From: SPELLWIND           
To: ARTHURIAN TYPES     
Subject: Mists of Avalon
Date & Time: 12/11/89 04:43:16
Message Number   878

  Not all King Arthur revisions are alike! Of all the different tellings
of one of my favorite stories, The Mists of Avalon is by far the BEST!
  The Mists of Avalon--- By Marion Zimmer Bradley,
 The best of the best...
 
                          A truly Arthured out Archdemon,
                                   Spellwind
===========

From: CYBERPUNK           
To: RUFUS               
Subject: bbs            
Date & Time: 12/11/89 07:15:50
Message Number   879

beleive me, if i wasn't broke, i would have a phone line!! 
 Cy
===========

From: CYBERPUNK           
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/11/89 07:16:36
Message Number   880

your 18?!?!?!?!!  damn, you look younger than me!!! oh well
 *BURP*
Cy
===========

From: SIR AVALON          
To: CYBERPUNK           
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/11/89 07:33:05
Message Number   881

  Thanks alot! I am glad I retain my youth, It'll pay off in the future
when you all look like old farts and I'm still youthfull...
 
Anyway, This is (was) Spellwind, with a new outlook/additude. Info on my
phonomenal change can be found in Wyvern's Den, and alot more in Courts 
of Chaos. I'm not so high and mighty anymore.
 
                                      Sir Avalon the Wisdom Seeker
                          Teach me new things, for I will be a willing
                                                                student.
===========

From: CYBERPUNK           
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: Jarvis Rd.     
Date & Time: 12/11/89 16:47:11
Message Number   882

ya, why?
 Cy
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: BARTHOLOMEW FOX     
Subject: Wizard         
Date & Time: 12/11/89 17:11:54
Message Number   883

It's an animated movie.. "They shot Fritz!" is probably the most famous
line.. watch for it..  (Go out and rent the movie now, any self respecin
movie rental store should have it) 
                   - Corwyn
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Life           
Date & Time: 12/11/89 17:14:09
Message Number   884

One: sunfishes suck.  Two: Hobie's are best when the wind is about 
twenty to thirty knots. Three: I expect that you were missing the girls 
and the beer... now /that's/ boring!
                            - Corwyn
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/11/89 17:16:33
Message Number   885

I was curious about that.. thank's for clarify-ing it. But what about
when you notice that your lollipop is grape not cherry? Are you still 
in love?
                               - Corwyn
===========

From: SIR AVALON          
To: CYBERPUNK           
Subject: Jarvis Rd.     
Date & Time: 12/11/89 18:10:17
Message Number   886

  I almost moved to the house back there with all the plants and trees 
in the backyard... Nice houses.
===========

From: RUFUS               
To: CORYWN OF AMBER     
Subject: Mainframe      
Date & Time: 12/11/89 18:54:22
Message Number   887

O.K.  This is for Turtle too.  Raven and Chip purchased the mainframe.
We stuck it in the back of my van to bring to your house, you wern't
home so we took it to Ham center where they had me drive on the 
sidewalk about 1/2 mile, then backup for some reason.  They bought
it because it has an Operating system with it.  Other than that, all I
know is it is named Athena Axelbreaker.  
Athena for the original name for HAL from 2001.
Axelbreaker because it is heavy.
 
Come on down to Rufus' we move it.  Mainframes to moose, we move it all.
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: PSYCHE              
Subject: WHY?           
Date & Time: 12/11/89 19:52:00
Message Number   889

Kind of. I'm quickly finding my love of mainframes over my love
of homework... (BTW, it's finally over at Turtle's place. Crystal
will probably KILL Turtle when she gets home...)
              Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: SPELLWIND           
Subject: Mists of Avalon
Date & Time: 12/12/89 02:45:00
Message Number   890

Not even close. If you're looking for the most imaginitive, most
unusual, and generally all-around most amazing retelling of the
King Author legend, check out "Mage"--a series of graphic novels by
(I believe) Mark Wagner (or sumpin' like that.) It is truly an
impressive work.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: SIR AVALON          
Subject: sigh...        
Date & Time: 12/12/89 02:47:49
Message Number   891

You're weird.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CORWYN OF AMBER     
Subject: Life           
Date & Time: 12/12/89 02:48:30
Message Number   892

>Three: I expect that you were missing the girls and the beer...
 
Certainly not the beer. Beer is one of the most disgusting substances
you can possibly put in your mouth. It has all the appeal of rotting
grain, with none of the delicate flavor. Beer is an amazingly noxious
liquid that really should recevie a hazardous waste code...if it doesn't
have one already.
                    --A beer-loathing Turtle
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: CORWYN OF AMBER     
Subject: love! & stuff  
Date & Time: 12/12/89 02:51:01
Message Number   893

>But what about when you notice that your lollipop is grape not cherry?
>Are you still in love?
 
No.
===========

From: TURTLE              
To: RUFUS               
Subject: Mainframe II   
Date & Time: 12/12/89 02:52:18
Message Number   894

Well, gang, an update on the mysterious DEC mainframe in Hamilton
Center: It ain't there anymore. That's 'cause it's in my utility room,
sitting right next to another, similar machine who will be its friend.
The new puppy works okey-dokey, boots up and everything, 'cept Yours
Truly doesn't have anything like...oh, documentation or manuals or
anything for it, so the reptile's playing blind. He's used RT-11
exactly once in his life, you see, and, well, TECO ain't exactly
intuitive, if you catch my drift. Still, it's a fun toy to play
with...think I'll use it to store recipies. All of them. And maybe
write letters.
                    --A mainframe Turtle
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: Life           
Date & Time: 12/12/89 04:01:24
Message Number   895

Fine: Rum and Coke, OK (another sailor's standby)
 if you're /really/ into sailing... you skip the coke.
 
          - Corywn (Competitor in the: Who get drink the most and still
                      manage to sail regatta) Aka Regatta time in Abaco
===========

From: CORWYN OF AMBER     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: love! & stuff  
Date & Time: 12/12/89 04:03:52
Message Number   896

How many lick's /does/ it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a
tootsie roll pop?
         
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: TURTLE              
Subject: PDP            
Date & Time: 12/12/89 10:06:53
Message Number   897

So... when are you going to put up the function "<D>oorway to the PDP"?
           Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: CORWYN OF AMBER     
Subject: Life           
Date & Time: 12/12/89 10:07:32
Message Number   898

You missed chocolate. And puppies. And flowers. 
          Have an excruciatingly pleasant day,
                  Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: CORWYN OF AMBER     
Subject: Me? Paranoid?  
Date & Time: 12/12/89 10:09:51
Message Number   899

   The Computer is your friend. The Computer wants you to be happy.
The Computer thinks that you are not happy enough. The Computer wants
you to take these happy pills. Failure to take these pills is treason.
You will be happy.
              Chip P. Unicorn
===========

From: CHIP P. UNICORN     
To: ROCKY               
Subject: My Brother?    
Date & Time: 12/12/89 10:14:17
Message Number   900

Yes, yes, thank you; thank you; I DID play a part of Amber, didn't I?
Temples to me strewn throughout Shadow... hundreds of admirers...
Oh, hell; I'm not The Unicorn, just a unicorn. But you can worship
me if you feel like it.
               Chip P. Unicorn
===========