💾 Archived View for gemini.spam.works › mirrors › textfiles › humor › COMPUTER › unix_laf.txt captured on 2022-06-12 at 09:26:50.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Funny things that happen in UNIX when you type:
28% rm God
rm: God nonexistent
31% man woman
No manual entry for woman.
36% make sense
Make: Don't know how to make sense. Stop.
37% sh
$ drink < bottle
bottle: cannot open
$ sleep with me
bad character
40% make love
Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.
41% man: Why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.
47% man -kisses dog
dog: Nothing appropriate.
48% man 'your asshole'
man: No manual entry for your asshole.
49% make mistake
Make: Don't know how to make mistake. Stop.
50% \(-
(-: Command not found.
56% Why don''t you smoke?
No match.
And another few:
Try this at your unix login :
>
> % rm meese-ethics
> rm: meese-ethics nonexistent
>
> % "How would you rate Quayle's incompetence?
> Unmatched ".
>
> % ^How did the sex change^ operation go?
> Modifier failed.
>
> % If I had a ( for every $ the Congress spent, what would I have?
> Too many ('s.
>
> % ^What is saccharine?
> Bad substitute.
>
> % %blow
> %blow: No such job.
>
> $ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
> no sense in pretending!
>
> $ drink <bottle; opener
> bottle: cannot open
> opener: not found