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It's Saturday night!
That should be the most active a pub gets, right? What are we up to?
Currently I'm examining my internet presence and cleaning it up a bit. I had re-signed up for some corporate internet services recently and I had been feeling bad about it, so tonight I've been deleting some accounts, uninstalling some bloatware, having a drink, and thinking about how little I miss most corporate social media. People ask me "don't you miss knowing what people are up to?" and if I'm generally not in the mood to explain how I still do use social media, just less corporate ones, I often just say "if people can't call, text, or email me about it, generally no, I do not."
Honestly, I could stand to focus more on my smaller, inner circle.
I'll probably be happier if I can unplug more and just focus more on smaller, tighter-knit communities, like this one.
Otherwise, work has been somewhat stressful. This week sucked, frankly. I was miserably sick with some sort of headcold for the majority of the week and I've been having anxiety and cold-medicine-related heart palpitations since Wednesday night, which are awful because they trigger EVEN MORE anxiety, which in turn makes the anxiety symptoms worse. I had been doing so well, too - more than two years without a panic attack, more or less. It's very frustrating.
So tonight I'm just relaxing. I owe nobody else my time right now. It feels good.
Next round's on me?
(also, the Matrix room's been pretty quiet lately - come say hi?)
Just been writing. Doing NaNoWriMo with a pen and notebook is harder than I thought. Not that it was easy last year doing it with a laptop and Emacs.
Did a metric ton of housework on Saturday, then watched "Bill & Ted Face the Music" with my family. It was a really sweet movie! Not sure how it would hit for someone who's not GenX or a GenZ child of Xers. Sunday was much the same.
Hi, its a day after Saturday night now ... we had a few neighbors over, and we did two "analog" things. We watched slides from way back (1985, 89/90, 99) about the US South-West, where I spent quite some time. Oh the nostalgia :-) And while we were at it, we had some whisky tasting %^> ... yumm!
Last night I saw 'The French Dispatch' for the second time, and an entirely new host of details stood out to me, which I'd hope is a reasonable indication of the film's depth. In fact, in contrast with the first time I saw it, at several moments this viewing nearly made me cry. There were performances—Benicio del Toro's in particular—to which I had paid insufficient attention the first time round.
Anxiety is awful. I hope you're feeling better after a bad week.
Hello! Sorry to hear about the anxiety, mine's has also gotten worse, to the point where the depression has kicked in. It often happens, after long-term anxiety my brain eventually flips and opts out of the anxiety, but also opts out of feeling anything. Which is actually kinda nice for a bit.
Didn't realise there was a matrix room, I'll hop onto it and hang about when I can.
> Currently I'm examining my internet presence and cleaning > it up a bit. I had re-signed up for some corporate internet > services recently and I had been feeling bad about it, so > tonight I've been deleting some accounts, uninstalling some > bloatware, having a drink, and thinking about how little I > miss most corporate social media. People ask me "don't you > miss knowing what people are up to?" and if I'm generally > not in the mood to explain how I still do use social media, > just less corporate ones, I often just say "if people can't > call, text, or email me about it, generally no, I do not."
I've been without the likes of Facebook and Twitter for at least eight years. Some great icing on no longer having said cake and choking on it too was giving up actively seeking "news", a practice that will have been going on for two years this coming March.
> Honestly, I could stand to focus more on my smaller, inner circle.
Speaking of geometric shapes, I'm slowly honing in on giving up the small, attention-destroying rectangle - i.e. the screen - altogether.
> I'll probably be happier if I can unplug more and just focus > more on smaller, tighter-knit communities, like this one.
Most signs/hints/clues my direction point to happiness being coincident with absence of thought(s).
> Next round's on me?
Appreciate it!
Cheers 🥂
Well, it has been a weird Saturday, with low energy for me, fighting with my wife for stupid reasons, and trying to organize my thoughts on many things. On the relationships with other people doing similar things in my country, on how I'm going to create stuff I want but I get distracted in the middle, and not earning the amount of money I want for some goals in the future.
It's getting colder over here. I don't like cold, and using winter clothes inside our home (for some reason here the houses are not warm enough) makes me angry.
That made me open Facebook and some other pages in an addictive way, until I finally Logged out completely (stupid dopamine shot my body was requesting to forget about everything for a while)
But well, thanks for reading. I don't want to share bad feelings. Now it's the middle of the night, and couldn't sleep, so I'm listening to a podcast (Texto plano) while I'm trying to relax a bit, it's just what I needed.
I wish for all of you that everything improves. Has been difficult times over here as well, but I'm still optimistic that everything will slowly get better and we will have enough energy to wait for it.