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By Cordelia Hebblethwaite BBC News
Some have called it "gender madness", but the Egalia pre-school in Stockholm
says its goal is to free children from social expectations based on their sex.
On the surface, the school in Sodermalm - a well-to-do district of the Swedish
capital - seems like any other. But listen carefully and you'll notice a big
difference.
The teachers avoid using the pronouns "him" and "her" when talking to the
children.
Instead they refer to them as "friends", by their first names, or as "hen" - a
genderless pronoun borrowed from Finnish.
Changing society?
It is not just the language that is different here, though.
Start Quote
This equality idea, it has become so absurd, it has become a really stupid
industry
Tanja Bergkvist Swedish blogger
The books have been carefully selected to avoid traditional presentations of
gender and parenting roles.
So, out with the likes of Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella, and in with, for
example, a book about two giraffes who find an abandoned baby crocodile and
adopt it.
Most of the usual toys and games that you would find in any nursery are there -
dolls, tractors, sand pits, and so on - but they are placed deliberately
side-by-side to encourage a child to play with whatever he or she chooses.
At Egalia boys are free to dress up and to play with dolls, if that is what
they want to do.
For the director of the pre-school, Lotta Rajalin, it is all about giving
children a wider choice, and not limiting them to social expectations based on
gender.
"We want to give the whole spectrum of life, not just half - that's why we are
doing this. We want the children to get to know all the things in life, not to
just see half of it," she told BBC World Service.
All the staff are clearly passionate about this.
A boy at Egalia reads himself a book Teachers say the aim is to help both boys
and girls
"I want to change things in society," says 27-year-old Emelie Andersson who is
fresh out of her teacher training, and specifically chose to work at Egalia
because of its policy on gender.
"When we are born in this society, people have different expectations on us
depending if we are a boy or a girl. It limits children.
"In my world, there is no 'girl's world' and there is no 'boy's world'," she
says.
Identity politics
Last year a Swedish couple provoked a fuss in the media by announcing that they
had decided to keep the gender of their young child, Pop, a secret from all but
their closest family members.
There was a similar case recently in Canada with a baby called Storm.
Start Quote
The director of Egalia Lotta Rajalin
All the girls know they are girls, and all the boys know that they are boys
Lotta Rajalin Director of Egalia
But is it not confusing for a young child to blur gender boundaries like this?
It is a criticism that Egalia director Lotta Rajalin has heard many times
before, but she contests it vigorously.
"All the girls know they are girls, and all the boys know that they are boys.
We are not working with biological gender - we are working with the social
thing."
The verdict of child psychologists and experts in gender is divided - with most
supporting of the aims, but questioning the means.
"The sentiments are excellent, but I'm not sure they are going about it in
exactly the right way," says British-based clinical psychologist Linda Blair.
"I think it's a bit stilted. Between the ages of three and about seven, the
child is searching for their identity, and part of their identity is their
gender, you can't deny that," she told BBC World Service.
Gender obsessed?
But Sweden takes gender issues seriously, and for a number of years now, the
government has been taking its battle to the playground.
Gender advisers are now common in schools, and it is part of the national
curriculum to work against discrimination of all kinds.
Sweden is often praised as being one of the most equal countries in the world
when it comes to gender, but there are critics at home who think things have
gone too far.
"This equality idea, it has become so absurd, it has become a really stupid
industry," rails Swedish blogger Tanja Bergkvist, who argues that the nation
has an unhealthy obsession with gender.
Start Quote
I find it a bit funny - who do they think they are fooling?"
Philip Hwang Professor of Psychology
"Gender researchers have convinced politicians that the solution to all
problems is a gender perspective.
"That's quite dangerous because they spend money and resources on the wrong
things."
The Egalia school - which is state-funded - is proving popular though, and
boasts a long waiting list.
Pia Korpi, a metal designer, and her husband Yukka, a dancer and choreographer,
have two children at the pre-school.
Ms Korpi says she, and her husband in particular, had to battle to pursue their
chosen interests because they sat uneasily with gender expectations, and they
want their children to feel free from these restraints.
She says most of their friends and family are 100% behind them, but admits some
people might not understand their choice. "People who don't know what this is
about - and especially in the countryside - they think it's brainwashing."
Swedish way
The idea of working with children in pre-schools - between the ages of one and
five years old - is to help shape them from a young age, but many doubt there
are any lasting effects.
Two dolls used in drama at Egalia pre-school Egalia is the Swedish word for
equality
"It's a real world out there - we cannot isolate people from that real world,"
says clinical psychologist Linda Blair.
Philip Hwang, Professor of Psychology at the University of Gothenburg - who has
conducted long-term studies of children's development - chuckles slightly when
talking about this scheme.
"I don't think it's anything bad," he says.
"But it is naive to say the least. It is a symbolic gesture. I find it a bit
funny - who do they think they are fooling?"
"It's very Swedish in a sense. Swedes have a tendency to think that if they
institutionalise something, it will automatically change - it's the Swedish
way," he told the BBC.
"But lasting effects - when it comes to issues embedded in our culture - that
takes generations."