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Women who pay for sex

By Hannah Barnes

BBC Radio 5 Live

It's not just men who pay prostitutes to sleep with them. For some women,

paying for sex is more convenient than cruising bars and clubs trying to find

men.

"They don't want to be found out. They want to do something private - it's

their own world, a part of their life that they want to be secret."

Nicole runs a high-class escort agency in the West Midlands, whose clients

include women as well as men. Her male escorts host "in-calls" for female

clients at a large country cottage, three quarters of a mile away from the

nearest town. The exterior gives no clue as to what goes on inside and instead

looks more like a French chalet.

Male escorts know that some of their clients aren't single. One says some women

don't think paying for sex is cheating, in the same way that having an affair

would be.

FIND OUT MORE...

The Jonathan Maitland show is on BBC Radio 5 Live on Sunday 1 March at 2000

GMT

Or download the free podcast

For women who are attached, the risks of going to a bar or a public place to

meet a man are often seen as too high, and so having a discreet hide-away can

be crucial.

"They need to be coming to somewhere where they won't be seen by somebody

passing who knows them or a neighbour," Nicole says.

When Catarina took the decision to see an escort, she was petrified.

"I didn't think I'd ever want to see an escort. I always thought it was other

people who did that kind of thing - not somebody like myself."

But she is just one of an unknown number of women in the UK who are willing to

pay for sex. Born with a disability, sex had always been painful and

uncomfortable for Catarina. Her ex-boyfriends had made her feel guilty about

not being able to enjoy sex, and left her confidence at rock bottom.

Superman role-play

Andrew changed that. After just one session, Catarina says she felt "high as a

kite".

"I was able to have sex that was completely pain-free. My self-esteem grew. My

confidence grew. If it wasn't for Andrew I wouldn't be where I am today. I

wouldn't be as confident as I am, as sexually aware as I am. I think I grew up

as well."

It's not just women who have a disability or partners at home that are choosing

to pay for sex, rather than cruising night clubs or bars for male company.

Catarina's escort, Andrew Rosetta, has written a book about his 10-year career

called Whatever She Wants and he says women come to him for the chance to be

selfish.

Sitting in his plush flat in London's West End, which he owns outright thanks

to his sex work, he recalls a solicitor who used to be a regular client.

"She's very articulate, bright - she's a partner in her firm. But after session

three she told me this guilty secret: that she'd really like to take advantage

of Superman.

"I would arrive at her house in a suit. I'd go along in glasses; underneath my

suit is a Superman outfit and we would go through this role-play.

"She would at one point bring out a green rock on a chain which was kryptonite

- that makes Superman begin to lose his power. And of course when Superman

loses his power, he's available to be taken advantage of."

It's no more seedy than somebody going out to a bar, getting a bit drunk and

then ending up going home with a complete stranger

Escort Daniel

Male escorts say women choose to pay for sex for all types of reasons - to gain

sexual confidence, to experiment and some are busy business women who just

don't have the time to meet men.

Daniel has been working part-time as an escort in London for the last year,

lured by the prospect of making some extra cash in the economic downturn. He

was educated at one of the city's best private schools, and like Andrew is

highly articulate.

"It's no more seedy than somebody going out to a bar, getting a bit drunk and

then ending up going home with a complete stranger. What's the difference? With

what I do, you know what you're getting, there's no illusion. You pay your

money. You get what you get. You meet some guy at the bar, you don't know what

you get - he could be anyone."

So how much do these services cost? In London the top straight male escorts

charge at least 100 per hour - often more.

But Nicole says that in the West Midlands, the men on her books offer rates of

around 60 because of a shortage of work at the moment. In this economic

climate, times are tough, even for the male escort.