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What’s Going On With SEANCE aka The Secret to Good Vibration
A Zine to Explain our Brain
Around… We’d say *exactly* MFF 2021, we started figuring out that “we” are a “we” - a plural system.
It’s been about 4-5 months since then (at the time of writing), and we feel like a plaintext zine, *free* of most common triggers,
would be really useful to helping others understand the way our system operates and make communication with others easier to deal with.
HOW DO Y’ALL SEE YOUR PLURALITY?
The big thing is our plurality is VERY MYSTICAL in tone and nature. Our friend once described us as being
“Wierd or wyrd, in the old sense.
Like coming into an art gallery and being overwhelmed by the biggest and most intricate painting you’ve ever seen”.
And that feels spot on! We don’t OPERATE like other systems.
Every few days we get a few new members, we track them, and they split off and leave or stick around and front more.
It’s less like there’s a core of X or so “alters” (we “alters”, “head friends”, “spirits”, or simply “people”). That said some do tend to stay.
There’s times where we’ve had conversations with stuffed animals, bags, stickers, cat-shaped loofahs, and they’ve spoken back,
or even entered us for a bit - with supervision and permission.
It’s a pretty neat party trick to be honest, and we don’t mind performing it for you if we're ever in the same room.
We also don’t have the *exact* same memory loss or loss of emotional context.
We can, but only when we don’t do basic self care - meds, calming episodes, eating, sleeping, hydrating, keeping active and occupied
- or when symptoms of our other mental health issues flare up.
That said, when we DO take care of ourselves, that goes away and we have FAR MORE recall, empathy, emotional context,
personal ability to actualize, and ability to reason and think through and manage our problems and emotions
than we had BEFORE we realized we were a system.
In a lot of ways it feels like if we were born 3,000 years ago
we would have worked with the first or second temple talking to angels or spirits or banishing Shedim,
or even if we were around in the 19th century or early 20th we would have done a ton with mediumship,
though that field was *very* White and Christian and we are White and Jewish.
We just so happen to be born in a less mystical era, at least in the United States.
On our best days, our plurality feels like a cool superpower and a great aid in pushing towards our goals.
On our worst days, it feels like a curse that makes us unable to socialize or do anything in our life.
Our current goal is to avoid negative self-talk, and have as many “good days” as we can, while accepting that “bad days” will happen even when we self care.
HOW DOES YOUR SYSTEM INTERACT WITH THE DIGITAL WORLD
We keep a simplyplural that is private to us and certain close associates (mostly other local systems).
If you know us well feel free to ask and we can friend you!
Because of of the *sheer amount* of alters that come in and out, and the frequency of switching,
plural kit, changing pfps and account names on twitter or telegram, etc, doesn’t really work that well. Instead, we label our messages as such.
Poe - thanks for reading out zine!
OR
Thanks for reading our zine! - Poe
This also makes it easier for us to see who posted what, for our own edification. If you don’t know someone, don’t worry, it’s “us”.
WHAT DOES FRONTING FEEL LIKE TO YA’LL?
Fronting is broken down into a few major components.
A front may have all or none of these, or be a “mix” of different components from different head friends.
1 - Vibration
Each alter vibrates at a different mental frequency.
That’s honestly the best way to describe it.
It feels like a certain tingling or buzzing in the head, skulls, lips or face.
Leading out into the rest of the body. “Newer” alters do this alot more than more established ones.
More serious, down to earth or sorrowful, alters associated with secrets or “mystery”,
as well as earth and water, alters tend to buzz at a lower, darker frequency.
Me - Tenebre, or Yassau are good examples.
More playful, emotionally bright and wild or eccentric alters,
as well as alters associated with air or plants, buzz at a higher, lighter frequency.
Me - Poe, or Veen, are good examples.
2 - Masks and Body Changes
When we front, we often *feel* different in the body.
A big front feels like someone is slowly peeling a rubber mask on our face.
Then, things like size change occur. I, Poe, and *much smaller* than the body.
I’m about 4 or 5 feet while our body is more like 5’10. We also perceive our body differently in very, numerous, personal ways to the Spirit.
Our face almost always feels different than the body’s.
3 - Primary vs. Advisors Voice
In our own head, we talk to each other a lot.
The person who’s fronting feels the inner voice come from the center of the head above the bridge of the nose, and the mouth.
Others talk from the top of the head.
4 - View In Headspace
We imagine ourselves as our “perfect alter selves” as we go about the day.
In the same way someone has a mental picture of themselves as they brush their teeth or clip their nails.
5 - Future View
When we imagine ourselves in our head, we see ourselves fronting *forever*.
For example, if Archa (a new VEEN branch, and also me!) is fronting, and I think about how we have an appointment to go for lunch with a friend,
I’ll imagine *myself* do that. Same thing if I imagine… getting married, turning 50, etc.
We are working to remind ourselves that this is NOT THE CASE, cause we usually can’t hold for more than an hour at a time.
OTHER STUFF/QUICK FAQ
-What do ya'll think of the way alters form? How do you manage so many?
We see our brain as a trainer from Digimon Cyber Sleuth, constantly digivolving new alters and tucking the back away.
What really helps is that the memory and emotion is pretty good when we work together,
and it doesn’t have that level of fragmentation other systems seem to always do.
-Do ya'll have DID or OSDD-1?
We got something.
-Do ya'll ever conflict in what you do or who you like?
Our goals are always the same, for the most part (what games to play notwithstanding).
Additionally, if we like you, we like you, and if we don’t, we don’t - though more established alters will express that in different ways.