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         S  A  N  D      R  I  V  E  R     J  O  U  R  N  A  L
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 Sand River Journal is a collection of poems gathered from the newsgroup
rec.arts.poems; it is posted monthly in ascii and TeX formats to r.a.p.  and
related newsgroups.  Current and archive issues may be retrieved by anonymous
ftp at the site etext.archive.umich.edu in the directory /pub/Poetry.  This
archive includes PostScript versions of the formatted journal, which is
publication quality and can be printed on most laser printers.

 Poems appear by authors' permission and constitute copyrighted material.
Free transmission of this document (electronic or otherwise) is permitted
only in its entire and unaltered form; to inquire about individual poems
contact the authors by their email addresses.  I take no responsibility
for the fate of this document, and claim ownership only to any poems I have
authored.  Send comments and finished contributions (please reference SRJ)
to asphaug@lpl.arizona.edu. Enjoy!

                                        Erik Asphaug, Editor



                  _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


                  Issue 10  -  Summer Solstice 1994

                  _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _





                ------
                Winter
                ------

        I raise my hands to the white hush-kiss
        of the snow. It's light as parachutes,
        cold as river water. Downhill
        a rabbit crashes, tumbles through heavy juniper
        looking for safe haven. She sees a falcon
        or the falcon sees her; both are lost to me
        in the early thin sun.


                        Karen Krebser
                        krebser@erg.sri.com



                ------
                Spring
                ------

        Dead feather skeletons
        Bud cautious yellow-green, rust,
        The dove wails welcome.


                        David Goldberger
                        goldberg@riker.neoucom.edu



                -------
                ecstasy
                -------

        you should not be watching me like that
        your gaze is a climbing rose  - twining
        you and me in fragrance and thorns

        the iceland poppies are shedding
        their green cloaks like timid novitiates
        shyly flirting with the dawn-sun

        the air is like sangria - each flower
        bleeds among the swords of grass
        singing chords of music

        do not weep over the scent of jasmine
        fresh crushed rosemarys - hold me
        and heal the stigmata of my hands


                        zita maria evensen
                        bu016@kanga.ins.cwru.edu



                -----------
                Don Quixote
                -----------

        he wandered the dark
        shrouded streets
        murmuring memories
        that were never
        his own

        nights spent sifting
        through the garbage
        of the world
        only seeking out
        the odd photograph
        or tattered letters
        abandoned to the past

        when the days came
        he'd meet sleep
        clinging to every line
        every time worn smile
        stolen in the night

        yet each word
        of separation
        would coil raging
        beneath his
        heavy lids
        as they fluttered
        into red
        then darkness


                        Jody Upshaw
                        jupshaw@hfm.com




                ---------
                she bends
                ---------

        she bends
        to kiss
        me.
        her hair
        falls on my
        face like a
        warm breeze
        and
        shuts out
        the world
        like a
        fragrant
        summer
        night.

                        zazu
                        daemon@anon.penet.fi



                ---------
                Lake View
                ---------

        The wind walks the waters
        Rippling the sky into a mosaic
                of tiny blue tiles

        The breezy fingers
                caress the grasses
        Making them whisper
                hissy secrets


                        William C. Burns, Jr.
                        burnswcb@gvltec.gvltec.edu



                -------------------------------
                In the Armenian Theater Company
                -------------------------------

        I.

        A desultory summer:  I had nothing left to do.
        I offered to do the lights.  Why?
        Admiration of her morroccan pantaloons?
        Nonsense!  the answer is simple:  Loneliness!
        I spent an evening at an old gentleman's house:
        he served us tea from ornate pitcher in the boggy dark
        a citrus-sweet yard, we built sets...
        turkish doorways and a dais.


        II. 

        I didn't do the lights.
        I said, "I am sorry:  it is too much for a neophyte"
        She said, "we are all neophytes here"
        I said, "Yes, but it is your play, and besides,
                we only just met... in a cafe"
        She said, "I understand.  I will do the lights myself!"
        However, she made me spinach pie after a Saturday hike.
        And told me, two hours too late:
        "There is no possibility, Ron, of romance."


                        Ronald Bloom
                        rbloom@netcom.com




                ------------------
                Joanna, on Parting
                ------------------

        She lives not closer than the sun
            across whose tarnished Realm
        sharp-fangled moment fears to run
             and love, to overwhelm -

        she changes faster than the Sky
             beneath whose pallid arch
        delirious fury gushes by
             and blazing footprints parch -

        she speaks like springtime nightingale
             resplendent and estranged
        in passion strong, in lifetime frail,
             and in deceit avenged -

          An apparition come and gone,
          A rainbow in the desert Sun.


                        Ilya Shambat
                        ibs4s@uva.pcmail.virginia.edu



                ------
                Lilies
                ------

        once upon a cliff
        in lily scented air
        I found the face of god

        at eight, the universe
        was green
        and juicy sweet

        I threw my body
        in rapture
        into a heaven

        of crunch and scent
        flawless communion
        of yellow and pink

        my falling unbound
        in me the glimmer
        of a ravishing joy

        which being born
        in me that day
        has never died


                        Judy Stanley
                        powell@ingres.com




                -----------------
                Isabelle Brasseur
                -----------------

        l'ombre blanc de son p`ere
        danse dans ce requiem
        elle tombe du lancement
        sur une vive ar`ete tout en gravant
        un arc qui atte'nue sa de'tente profonde

        the white shadow of her father
        dances in this requiem
        she drops from the toss
        on a sharp edge scribing
        an arc that eases her deep recoil


                        E. Russell Smith
                        ab297@freenet.carleton.ca



                --------------
                Recitation Day
                --------------

        I have never seen anything
        clean manhatten's twilight
        like this stormy apocalypse of rain

        through the coolness and blur
        of the water-lens window
        a light green odor of leaves

        while I memorize and recite and
        recite in rainy gusts of voice
        the poetry of Robert Lowell


                        Kelly Anne Berkell
                        kab29@columbia.edu



                -----------
                Connections
                -----------

        That was no miracle, no mere coincidence,
        my friend--you with the raised eyebrows--
        when you answered the telephone and knew
        before a word was spoken;
        who thinks to put a letter in the box,
        to raise the flag, and one is there.
        The mind will muse when no one watches.
        Like Phaedo, we make our case
        with other selves and turn the page
        before they answer--a case that smiles
        with teeth only when it is caught.
        You will swear like a don you were not there,
        or like a witness who was and saw nothing,
        but they will out as surely as a bell sounds
        or a parallel thought is spoken--
        as surely as dreams are found by sunrise.


                        Larry Whatley
                        larryw@lsid.hp.com



                -----------------
                Pastoral Escapade
                -----------------

        You mutilate language to see how it works,
        if it can still escape your maze.
        You boil it down to poetry, the bones into glue.
        The only proof's a broken-down confession;
        shelter for the night.

        To say that trees are silent is to say that the wind
        whispered to you with her eyes. If it were love,
        she'd hide the broken crockery. Lost for words,
        the sky seeps through cracks in glued porcelain,
        or more simply, dead, brittle elm branches
        that would love to sway in storms
        just one more time but as daylight drains
        away through the swirling moonhole
        they know it's too late. What's left is just an island;
        were it a lakeside, it wouldn't curve away so.

        A swig of blue and suddenly things are back
        the way they were before - abandoned haywains
        of desire, a distant cockerel, then rain delaying dawn -
        but part of the night remains: the black, wrinkles;
        the brown, blood; the pink, whatever you like -
        after all, you paid. Its flowers will hunt you down.


                        Tim Love
                        tpl@eng.cam.ac.uk



                -----
                Bears
                -----

        She found finally
        that she loved him
        but he was too expensive
        as bears usually are
        to keep around her heart
        he had rough ways which injured
        and his claw-marks on her life damaged and wounded.

        There is this about bears
        a near-sighted obliviousness
        so large they simply do not notice what is in their way
        and they have no familial feeling
        the males
        and no protectiveness neither
        and he went through her life like the ravager he was
        in one end
        tearing through the other.

        She visited a zoo years later
        she recognized that look
        and squeezed the soft hand of the man she had chosen
        and felt sorrowful anger
        towards the large brown form
        alone in the passing cage.


                        Ralph Cherubini
                        ralph@bga.com



                ------------------
                Those are the days
                ------------------

        Those where the days
        and my heart belongs to my mamma

        but today
        I need something that I can't understand

        those are the days
        we walk together to our Odysseia.


                        Jari Suuronen
                        4jari@adpser2.gsf.fi



                ------------------
                The Fairytale Game
                ------------------

        a thimble and a hatpin
        were all she'd given
        in a trembling whisper
        two common objects
        to act as fodder
        for the fairytale

        our favorite game

        closing eyes
        i saw the forest
        the daughter, the darkman
        and the dying father
        felt the cool thimble
        filled by healing water
        carried down
        the high mountain's
        side

        i felt that poison prick
        biting into skin
        heard the beast howl
        from the shadowed trees
        heard her breathing
        under me
        and let the story flow


                        Jody Upshaw
                        jupshaw@hfm.com



                ---------
                beginning
                ---------

        I don't want to think or sing tonight,
        I don't want to do anything but place your face
        into my hands like a gift I could stare at for hours.
        I want to slip you into my fearless arms
        and tell you that I love you until I run out of breath.

        As background clocks whir loudly in this aging night,
        I want to brush your hair softly and study your pupils,
        wet in their overwhelming honesty
        and fuller than the dark we sit in.
        I want to fingertip your sentient lips
        and feel the start of a sigh deep in my belly.
        I want to be as old as I am right now,
        embodying what your eyes say,
        and believing with unflinching certainty
        that the soul exists.

        And though it's nearly summer
        with its towel of heat blanketing us.
        Holding you as our skin forms a human seam
        is as right as the smell of the air before it rains,
        pristine and almost intoxicating.

        Let me hear your voice speak one more time
        before we sleep,
        for the motion of air climbing your langorous neck
        rings like a fragile chorus,
        while seductive and exotic as the shape
        of your eyes.

        You have struck me like a thunderbolt,
        saturated me with life brimming
        and bathed me in the delicate knowledge that petals know
        when they eat the morning dew.

        Today I am wholly breathing this love
        and it fills my lungs
        like my first taste of chocolate.


                        ivan garcia
                        stersrch@leland.stanford.edu


                -----------------------------------------
                Albumen and the Myth of the Walking Women
                -----------------------------------------

        Your legs stretched so far that you
        recalled the Barberini nude locked
        up as you were
        in that Noho garret in '65
        with the torturous beeping noises
        and mysteriously contracting lenses

        Her breast were a pert template
        for rayon
        make-overs in steel as you
        dropped her hard as cardboard outside
        the Mary Boone praying that death
        would not skulk in the guise of
        a yellow taxi.

        Now she stumbles in straw filled heels
        again past the Royal Bank on Spadina
        with huge Chinese characters
        -a black profile with no armholes
        seething with the remembrance of
        ogling stares.


                        Kate Armstrong
                        kmarmstr@uoguelph.ca



                ------------------------------------
                Mark Antony, from Home, to Cleopatra
                ------------------------------------

        Octavia came to me this morning bearing fruit
        from the orchards: sweet pears and persimmons,
        figs thick with the scent of earth
        --for our trees and vines are overflowing now--
        and sat near me while I ate, her look hard to divine.
        Could she know that even now you are in the fruit,
        that the taste of figs is the taste of your tongue
        crossing mine by night, long ago but remembered,
        at dawn, that the scent of orchards swept
        by the wind off the Tiber before the morning rain
        is your sweet musk, and that I cleave
        to this orchard, to this house,
        even to Octavia, because all things are you
        and you are in all things?

        I have grown old, my love, sitting here
        by my wife's orchards, sending my dreams
        outward toward you over the sea.
        You would not know me now.
        I am going gray and too often I feel
        the morning mist seep into my muscles.
        The figs revolt my stomach, the persimmons erupt my bowels,
        but I cannot tell Octavia.  I drink too much.
        I fear that if I cross the seas again
        as you have bid me a hundred times,
        come to you again, you will see me
        and cry out to think I am a ghost,
        Julius Caesar, returned.
        I could not endure that.

        We are draped in our ghosts, love,
        we wear them like tatty gowns.
        When they blow aside, lifted by the winds
        that drive us, we are exposed,
        our bared private flesh, held out to aging
        and the scorn we have engendered
        in two worlds at once.
        We are damaged goods, love: tired rags
        that have lost their shape and color, hanging
        on dressmaker's forms in separate rooms.
        We have learned everything except how to dress our lives.
        Octavia, Caesar, a hundred camp followers,
        hang from us in disarray.  Their smells overwhelm
        even the redolence of this orchard,
        even the memory of your scent.

        You are the fruit, at last, my love.
        Musk and roses, the taste of persimmons
        on your tongue, your sweetened breath against my ear
        in your cry of passion released.
        That first night long ago, on the barge,
        then there was no Caesar, no Octavia,
        no bought and paid for love,
        only the motion of the Nile
        and the motion of your hips
        as you drank me into you.
        In the morning we stood on the deck and you laughed
        at the pair of hippos copulating on the riverbank.
        "They are vile to everyone but themselves," you said,
        and held my arm.  And so they were, and so we are become.
        I will come to you again, with this letter,
        on the next tide, and let the river itself beware.


                        Kenneth Wolman
                        woldoc@woldoc.jvnc.net



                ------------
                come tuesday
                ------------

        looking opening up at your star face
        shine as water reflecting my imagination
        wash me into a breaking heartache

        i knew knew knew you were here


                        gena ram
                        ram@bms.com



                -----------
		sand cranes
                -----------


	sand cranes in flight
	with fingers of hard teak
	touch   light
	like a steely gentle brush
	from a butterfly's wing
	on white sewn skin  riding
	a taut high wire
	like an undecided
	marionnette
	
	unforgiving gray grains
	flying under take-off
	as sun burns rivers of sweat
	from sand-weathered skin
	sand cranes with butterfly kisses
	and wingtips sending bullets
	through burning summer
	no one   no one   no one
	point    point
	sideout


                        zita maria evensen
                        bu016@kanga.ins.cwru.edu



                --------
                homesick
                --------

        home is where
        the heart is
        is where
        you can't go back to.
        is when it is august
        & the days stretch
        like shadows   or cats
        & fold in by degrees
        too small to measure out.
        before you realize it,
        (eyes closed,  cup to lips,)
        twilight pours into night
        & you are racing
        thru backstreets
        as the crow flies
        the smell of ocean
        breeze & seaweed
        fly away home


                        Jamie Jamison
                        copijmj@mvs.oac.ucla.edu



               --------
               On Paper
               --------

        shouldn't it be

        that that which can't be said
        remains most beautiful?

        dreams
        shouldn't all be remembered.

        what we remember,
           the abstraction that sifts through time,

           waves that chop against the shore now and then
           the wind gets rough,

        what we remember
        gets locked,

        distilled and distinct,
        put down on paper.


                        Erik Asphaug
                        asphaug@lpl.arizona.edu



                --------
                Full Jug
                --------
 
        Summer trembles in a breeze
                like Li Po stooping for a hand of white grapes
                and these grapes are white rooms of summertime
                jiggling in the eye.

                                Here is a clue
        to antelope eyes and to my hands anchored
        to this yoke which is my collarbone
        laid brittle and bare.

                                        And I see
                a man to his thighs in the current
                scooped at and torn as a secret.

                                                This
        fruit is wine and never stagnant,
        it tumbles into gorges like blown silk
        pitched into summer and round.


                        mike finley
                        mfinley@skypoint.com



                ------
                beauty
                ------

        there are moments
        which make them stop
        speechless and opened
        reminded of something
        long hidden
        something supple and green
        beyond hill or horizon
        beyond reward or retribution
        something lost in frenzied
        avarice or desperation
        something so lithe and yielding
        so whirling, trembling, born of bliss
        lines and light of unfathomable joy
        colors which enfold and resurrect
        their deadened souls
        and make them weep


                        Judy Powell
                        powell@ingres.com



                ----------
                our bodies
                ----------

        our bodies,
        backs arched,
        are like the petals of a flower.
        a humming bird rises
        burning brighter and brighter.
        the petals wilt
        leaving behind
        the sweet smell of
        decay.


                        zazu
                        daemon@anon.penet.fi



                ----------------
                metallic highway
                ----------------

        barreling down the metallic highway
        streaking a smear of moods and hours
        lithium patient, yes, lithium patient, please
        please don't wander off too far.

        but the cars, they are turning their wheels towards me
        i know, i saw them do that, the parked
        unoccupied ones.

        and the people, they are sending thoughts to me,
        and they're reading mine, i know, i can
        tell from their gestures and still backs.

        nothing is as it seemed.  there is more to
        reality than the old reality.

        this is a little like watching tv
        with the color knob turned up.
        this is a little like putting roses in stainless steel vases.
        this is like no trip i have ever done.

        barreling down the metallic highway
        i am the shining
        i am the whirling
        i am the connected one.


                        Marek Lugowski
                        marek@mcs.com



                -----------------
                a common language
                -----------------

        every beginning contains it's end
        lacking common language
        we barter w/ words
        a form of exchange

        he is still able to believe
        in a sense of progression
        of intelligent/rational decisions which lead
        to improved opportunities
        like manifest destiny
        stretching to some distant certain future

        & I on the other hand


                        Jamie Jamison
                        copijmj@mvs.oac.ucla.edu



                --------------
                mourning nixon
                --------------

        so we oh god
        we oh oh godded
        our way through the night.  twice.

        then he said "i always wanted
        to be a gigolo.  you know.
        make women happy then go away.  though
        it never seems to work out that way."

        after that the flags were at half-mast.
        it happened weeks after the president's death.


                        JJHemphill
                        jjh54139@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu