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?042????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 042?

?               ISSUE 42 -  PHONE LOSERS OF AMERICA - ISSUE 42               ?

?                                                                            ?

? Introduction...........................................................p39 ?

? Geraldo Show Transcript...............................................p102 ?

? Where's Dino?.........................................................p168 ?

? 7-Eleven Halloween Terrorism..........................................p196 ?

? Bus Boredom...........................................................p394 ?

? CuervoCon Announcement................................................p416 ?

? Letters...............................................................p523 ?

?                                                                            ?

?                                                                            ?

? "Is your life still based around being a pain in the ass?"-Chris Tomkinson ?

?                                                                            ?

?                                                                            ?

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

?                      Released on December 10, 1996                         ?

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

?PLA is a publication of information, humor and satire.  Nothing in any issue?

?is to ever  be taken seriously.  We are  not responsible for  your stupidity?

?042????????????????http://www.peak.org/~bueno/pla.html???????????????????042?



Wow, a whole six issues in one year. I'm really starting to slack off. That's

pretty lousy compared to the previous year's thirty-six issues. Maybe I'll 

continue the trend and release about two issues in 1997. 



Nothing exciting is happening in PLA Land. El_jefe, apok0lyps and z3nsless 

loaded up their gear and moved to Corpus Christi, Texas to mingle with the 

dead jelly fish and drunken mexicans at 7-Eleven. Me & Colleen & Emily have 

relocated to Celina, Ohio just in time for the -172 degree winter. The police 

seem to have given up finding those kids in the boatyard.



The time is almost here for the newest edition of the Phone Loser's quarterly

phone directory so submit your new phone numbers today. Since people only like

to submit numbers for the loser list, I've thought up a nifty new requirement-

if you want to submit a loser, you also gotta submit two pay phone numbers for

each loser. There, that'll teach you people. All numbers are verified so just

try to pull a fast one on me. I hope you all hate this issue and quit reading

PLA forever.                            -RedBoxChiliPepper





??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

?                        Transcript of Geraldo Show                          ?

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????



What follows is a transcript from the June 14, 1996 Geraldo show on computer

hackers that I taped and typed out a transcript of it. Since nobody would buy

the transcripts for $19.95 plus shipping and handling from me, I decided to

print it up here in PLA for free. So if you missed the actual show, read on...



    [Theme song plays & Geraldo runs out around the audience. Applause.]



  GERALDO (to the audience): Do you know who can access a computer to find out

how much is in your checking account? How much you owe on your credit card?

Where you shop? Who you've called on your telephone?  Our guests today are

going to tell you just how easy it is and make you think twice before using

your credit card or making a phone call.



  GERALDO (turns to introduce guests): This is Tsumushima Shumora, (stutters)

no, I mean Tmususoto Shimora...I...(laughs). How DO you pronounce your name?



  SHIMORA: I'm not really sure.



  GERALDO: Well, Shimora is the author of the best selling book, Takedown,

an autobiography which details Shimora's relationships, work life as a

computer security expert, ski trips, favorite coffee shops and in the last 

couple chapters, the pursuit and capture of world-famous computer hacker, 

Kevin Mitnick.



				[applause]



  GERALDO: Mr. Shimora, what possessed you to write this book and why do you

believe the world is interested in your social life?



  SHIMORA: Well, actually it's a- (gets inturrupted by Geraldo)



  GERALDO: Whatever. (introducing second guest) And here we have famous 

mid-western computer hacker, Phillip, who goes by the aliases Lax Vaxen & Mr. 

Hack and heads one of the more elite underground groups in the United States 

known as the NOC Hackers. Phillip is going to demonstrate just how simple it 

is to aquire information that most of you consider to be private.



	[close up of Phillip typing away on a computer terminal. Camera

	 goes in on screen and you can see Phillip on IRC getting flooded

	 off by half the people in #hack.]



  GERALDO: What are you up to right now, Phillip?



  PHILLIP: Well, I've accessed a highly secret system on the information

superhighway that allows computer hackers to talk to each other. There's a

problem, though, because I keep losing my connection.



  GERALDO: And what exactly do you talk about once you've accessed this

computer?



  PHILLIP: Oh, you know...how to break into other systems and how to hack

boards and make red boxes and blow things up and stuff like that.



  GERALDO: Red boxes?



  PHILLIP: Yeah, it's a little device that makes secret tones to fool pay

phones into thinking you've put in money. (Pulls a red box out of the front

of his pants and holds it up for the audience to see.)



  GERALDO: Could we hear the tones that this box makes?



  PHILLIP: Well, it doesn't work right now because I haven't figured out how

to solder the new illegal crystal in and I keep melting the circuit boards

but when I finally get it, I'll be able to make free calls.



  GERALDO: That's, uh, interesting. Our next guest, who we'll call Jim, wishes

to remain anonymous. He says that computer hackers have made a mess of his

life after he engaged in a war on a local computer service with hackers.



	[camera focuses in on a man wearing a hat, dark glasses and

	 panty hose over his face.]



  "JIM": They ruined everything I had. They called my house day and night, they

called the hotel I worked at constantly, they re-programmed the gas pump at

7-Eleven to dispense sugar instead of gasoline which ruined my car, they hacked

into the city's computer and ordered them to come to my house and take my

rotweiler away and have him put to sleep.



  GERALDO: And the police could do nothing?



  JIM: No, when I called the police, they looked at my name on their computers

which told them I was wanted in 36 states for assault with a deadly penis. I'm

still on probation for that and I'm not even responsible.



  GERALDO: (gets that dramatic look on his face) Not even responsible. After 

we come back, you'll meet FBI agent Mike Buford who'll tell you what's being 

done to put a stop to this kind of electronic terrorism on the information

superhighway.



			     [commercial break]



  GERALDO: Today we're discussing computer hackers on the information high-

way and how they affect your life. This is FBI agent Mike Buford who's been

with the agency for 12 years now in the computer crime division. Mike, how big

of a problem is this and what's being done to counter-attack these criminals?



  MIKE: Well, Geraldo, I can't really say anything about that because it's a

secret.



  GERALDO: Then why are you on this show?



  MIKE: Well, me and my wife were planning on taking a vacation out this way

and when you offered to fly me out for free, how could I resist?



  GERALDO: (gets a pale look on his face) ...Let's take a few questions from

the audience. (runs out into the audience and hands the microphone to a lady)



  LADY: Yes, my question is for Phillip...By watching you type there, I noticed

that my 10-year-old daughter types faster than you. Does this make you feel

stupid and are you equally slow in other aspects of life?



  PHILLIP: Hey, shut up. [laughter from audience]



  GERALDO: (runs over to a man with greasy hair and a fishing cap.) Yes, how 

about you, sir?



  MAN:  My question is for "Jim" - yeah, did they have a cellyalur phone or 

caller I.D? Because the little cocksuckers that were on my fuckin' cordless

phone were sitting in a goddamn van across from my fuckin' house and they

were using computers and cellyalur phones to tap my number.



  JIM: (breaks down crying) Yes! It was the cellular operator that called us

for over a month straight! (sobbing) Eventually we knew all of the cellular 

operators by name. It was horrible. I'm not sure about the caller I.D., though.



  MAN: Yeah, well all these little jackoffs could do was play their stupid

fucking games and I said, hey, come down here and I'll give you a hundred 

dollars but they never showed up.



  JIM: Sir, not to be rude or anything, but exactly what year of grade school

did you drop out of?



  MAN: Yeah, like your the first fuckin' person to say that to me.



  SHIMORA: Geraldo, I'd just like the audience to know that me and my girl-

friend did eventually get back together and we're doing great now and we plan

to get married in about two years.



  GERALDO: Who cares, Shimora? (agreement from audience)



  GERALDO: Phillip, do you ever feel that you're intruding on people's privacy

when you hack into a system and retrieve all of their personal information.



  PHILLIP: No, I think what I do is protected by the 1st amdendment in the

Declaration of Independence, and besides, I can't always get all of their

personal information because they might not be listed in the phone book and

my CD-ROM phone books only give out their name, address and phone number. Then

I have to call the people a social engineer their credit cards and stuff out

of them.



  GERALDO: And this works?



  PHILLIP: Not yet, but I'm getting real close.



  GERALDO: Phillip, I want you to pull up my personal credit history as an

example of just how easy it is for a high school kid to infiltrate today's

supposedly secure system.



  PHILLIP: Okay, I'll get right on it.



  GERALDO: We've gotta take a break now. When we return, you'll meet AT&T

spokesman, John Moro. After this.



			 [commercial break]



  GERALDO: We're here with John Moro, a spokesman for AT&T who claims their

security is just fine. John, what's AT&T's yearly loss due to fraud by

hackers?



  JOHN: Oh, I'd say around $893 billion or so. Down two percent since last 

year. See, people expect a convenient phone system that's totally secure and

impenetrable to anything and that's just not possible these days with such

rapidly advancing technology. No matter how secure we make the system, there's

gonna be holes in it.



  GERALDO: John, are you really a spokesman for AT&T?



  JOHN: ...Well, no, actually I'm just the night janitor over at the main

office. See, they're a little short-handed this week and they asked me to

fill in for John. My name's actually Ed. Hell, last week I was mopping with 

one hand and answering directory assisstance calls with the other. The hours

are good, though.



  GERALDO: I see, well you're what I'd consider an inside source, then. What

do you see happening there? Do you think the phone company takes the proper

precautions to protect against hackers?



  ED: Well, Geraldo, no I don't and I say this mostly because I'm pissed at

Robert because he keeps putting his chewed gum underneath his desk and it's

a sumbitch to scrape off. Other than that I'd say they're secure.



  GERALDO: Ed, you're not operating on all six cylinders, are you? ...(turns

to Phillip) How's my credit history coming along, Phillip?



  PHILLIP: It's no good, you're unlisted.



  GERALDO: Unlisted? I thought you hackers were supposed to be able to get 

unlisted privelidged proprietary information. Why can't you get my credit 

report? Do you even have my phone number yet?



  PHILLIP: Just give me some time! I don't work well under pressure.



  GERALDO: (covers the microphone and mutters something to Phillip.)



  PHILLIP: Hey, fuck you! I'm not a hacker, okay?!?! I'm nothing but a lame

wanna-be anarchist! I admit it, alright! Here, take your computer and shove

it up your nose! (Phillip picks up the monitor and throws it at Geraldo's 

face, probably breaking his nose.)



The rest of the show was nothing but a test pattern so I can only assume that

the cable company was having problems or something. It was storming outside.





??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

?                              Where's Dino ?                                ?

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

The most common question I've been asked over the past couple of years is

what ever happened to Dino Allsman? I get tons of mail from people asking me 

for his phone number and/or address and asking if it was really a true story.

So here's the latest scoop on Dino:



While living in Corpus Christi, I called el_jefe and we decided to call Dino

Allsman but both of us had lost his phone number. So we called his wife, 

Shana's, work and told the person there that I was Shana's dad and it's an

emergency that I get her phone number. The stupid blonde working there says,

"Sure!" and gives me the number. We tell her how incredibly stupid she is and

hang up.



Dino wasn't quite as agressive as we remembered him. Maybe we just wore him

out or something. We called him up and started our usual lame barrage of

"Roy! Roy!" and "How's the cordless phone, Dean-o," etc. and he didn't spend

much time with us, just called us motherfucking cocksuckers a few times and

slammed down the phone. Stupidly, I didn't tape any of it.



That was the end of that. A few months later when we left Corpus and visited

East Alton again, I did alot of cordless listening hoping to once again hear

Dino and perhaps even create a sequel to the story, but he never came on. I

did hear some little kids making prank calls, though, which was kind of funny.



A year passed and once again we stopped by East Alton on our way to Ohio. On

the very last day we were there, I turned on my scanner and guess who I heard?

Shana! And what was better is that she called Dino and they had a fight. I 

guess Dino was at a drinkin' buddy's house or something and Shana called him

to yell at him because he always spends all their money by cashing checks at

Schnucks. She asked what the hell he wrote a check for $15 for and he claimed

it was for a gallon of anti-freeze. (About $3.99 for most people.)



The argument climaxed and right around the end Shana says, "Dino, I need to

know where you and me stand...I need you to meet me half-way here...  .....

...Dino?..." And he replies (and I swear I'm not making this up), "Hold on, I

gotta find my cigarettes." The conversation ended abruptly shortly after that.



Not much more news since then. We left town that day and we'll probably check

in on him again. Someone should open an ISP across the street from Dino, 

perhaps in the church, then set up a RealAudio stream of all cordless phone

activity in that area. That would rule. Anyone who does that get's a free PLA

t-shirt.



Dino sound clips are now available for you to listen to by pointing your

browser at http://www.bright.net/~bac/heardino.html or you can follow the link

from PLA's main page. Listen to Dino calls us jackoffs, hear him threaten us

with his 12 guage, cower in fear as he dials the authorities on us.



??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

?             7-Eleven Halloween Terrorism - by Dairy Queen                  ?

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Sweet Jesus, did I ever have a good Halloween.  It all started off with me and 

my friend, Peter, decideing to bust into my church and make prank calls from 

there.  (Don't think that I'm a bad guy breaking into a church, my Dad is a 

minister and I know the secrets on how to get in.)  While we were harrassing 

our fellow St. Louisans, Peter remembered that he was supposed to call some 

girl he knows that works up at 7-11.  But when he called the girl did not 

answer the phone but rather a mean sounding fellow named Eddie. He would not 

put the girl on and he told us to fuck off. This is rude because we had yet to 

try any shit on him.  But now that he's been established as a prick-tease we 

must hurt him.  So I remembered your little idea on acting like you're going 

to rob them.  So I tried it, and he threatened my life.  He talked like Robert 

DeNiro, I was pictuing some tough older Italian Man.  After this conversation 

is when I called back and decided to stray from your plan and wing it on my 

own:



EDDIE: 7-11, What?

JARED: That was rude, can I speak with your manager?

EDDIE: No he aint here.

JARED: How do you sleep at night knowing what you do to those little girls, 

       do you realize what their lives will be like for the rest of there 

       lives?

EDDIE: What little girls, what the fuck are you talking about?

JARED: Didn't you think that maybe one of those little girls has a brother? 

EDDIE: I didn't do jack shit, stop calling me mofo. or I'll kick your ass.

JARED: Over the phone?

EDDIE: I get off at ten you meet me outside if you have some kinda problem 

       with me.

JARED: I'm gonna bring you down mother fucker, Im gonna rip off your head and 

       piss in the stump, I'll fuck your mother so hard that you'll be out of 

       a job.



It went on like this for 20minutes.  I got so into it that I actually thought 

that I was going to kill this man. I think he was crying by the end. The 

conversation ended with me yelling "Youre going down like your sister at a 

frat party." And he hung up.



By this time it was about 9:15, Peter's got some strict parents so I had to 

get him back home.  On the way we decide to stop off at the 7-11 at Olive and 

Fee-Fee, to get a look at Edie.  



In the parking lot there were four police cars, and a few of my friends' vans.

My friend  tells  me that his friend Edie who works there was being harassed, 

and that he's afraid to walk home.  



Peter and I say bye to our friend and continue into the store.  There we find 

a tall skinny black man, real sickly lookin, with skelotone make-up that had 

run down from his eyes.  He was crying.  But he had stopped now and he was 

bragging to this girl we know, "Mother Fucker must have a death wish 

threantin my death."



Peter says, "You mean 'life', threatining your life, or a death threat."



Peter has a lot of Balls (13, in fact)



He told his side of the story to us,  I was about to throw up out of fear of 

the cops outside, and at how he was ruining my story.  So Peter shook his hand 

and we left. The next day at school Everyone was talking about boy Eddie and 

how someone wants him dead. 



I later found out that the story did not end there. As it turns out Eddie had 

had some of his friends hanging out in the back room smoking some pot earlier 

in the evening.  They were apparently sloppy and left some roaches on the 

bathroom sink.  Well, one of the many cops that I puppeteered into going to 

7-Eleven that evening found the leftovers.  Eddie now works at Venture.  This 

is not the end.  



??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

?      Things to do While Riding on the Bus - by Interphace & Kingpin        ?

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

We all ride or at one time rode a school or other bus. Most of these have been 

dirty, smelly, and hazardous. So what to do about this? Well, if you hate the 

driver and the kid behind you is the biggest asshole alive, or maybe you're

just bored, then this file is for you. If you like riding the bus, stop 

reading this and slap yourself across the face, you queer! Now, onto the 

dirty stuff.





		       THINGS TO THROW OUT THE WINDOW



If its a really hot day and everyone behind you has their windows open you can 

easily make their ride into a living hell. My favorite thing to do is to take 

wonderful Sunny Delight and, when its windy, pour it out of the side of the 

bus.It gets on the lower windows and your busmates! This stuff never comes off 

and the more you wet it down, the more of a stain it becomes. It dosen't do 

the windows too much good either. If you're really daring, replace Sunny D 

with colored whiteout. Then watch the screams as it gets in their hair, mouth, 

eyes, etc....



When you stop and there are cars next to you (also stopped) there are alot of 

fun ways you can be a little bastard. Take some honey (or other sticky 

substitute) and pour it on their windsheild. When they wonder what it is, and 

turn on the wipers, all hell breaks lose. It smears and they can't see! (If 

you've poured enough on) They'll probably drive anyway, not knowing that they 

just drove over a dog, cat and senior citizen.



Fill up a powerful squirt gun (a super soaker XP 257 sprays like a hose and 

kicks ass if you can smuggle it on the bus) with ketchup or mustard or other 

condement. Find some poor sap with a business suit and his/her car window down 

and yell, "Hey, Mr/Mrs! Bark like a dog and sqawk like a chicken or I'll make 

it look like your a very messy eater!" If he's smart, he'll do it. If he trys 

to put up his window, let that XP rip. This way is even better cause it gets 

on his window and him. Here's another catch. After he's done sqawking, spray 

him anyway. This puts him in a very bad mood for the rest of the work day.



Next, go to your local store and buy fake vomit, gak, slime, etc, roll them up 

into little balls and when the cars are zooming past you in the opposite 

direction, fling them right out in front of you and let the other car catch 

them. This should make them screw up their driving and go off the side of the 

road, into the later half of your bus, or (even better) crash into your school.



Have any leftover food? Throw that have bitten apple at the old lady crossing 

the street, that pudding cup on your principal's head, a bannana right in 

front of that happy-go-lucky jogger (this one takes real skill), and watch as 

they chase after you in vain with their cane, pencil, headphones, etc..



		  NIFTY WAYS TO MESS WITH PEOPLE'S HEADS



If you see a biker who isn't carrying a shotgun (rare) ,yell "Hey buddie! 

There's a HUGE wasp on your head, and it looks pretty damn mad!!" He will

frantically try to swat the imaginary bug while trying to keep control of the

bike. This is hilarious until he crashes into your bus and your bus driver 

mentally flips, then flips the bus.



Write signs like "There's a BOMB on our bus and THAT'S why we're going so 

slow!" or "This bus driver takes us to a cabin in the mountains and BEATS us!"

This will surely get paranoid loyal citizens to run to the nearest pay phone

to box a call to get you and your abusive bus driver some help.



Rapidly lick the windows and make horny gestures to the poor people behind

you. This is great for older people.



Just stare at the people behind you. They can't help but look back every now 

and then to see if your still staring. It drives them nuts.



Like Beavis & Butthead did, moon the other drivers by sticking your ass in the 

window and watch them hurl.



Ask all truck drivers to pull the horn. One time we did this and our driver

almost drove of the side of the road.



Yell to some dude on the sidewalk or in a vehicle, "Hi Uncle Ron! Hows Aunt

Pattie? Does she still drink out of the toilet? Did you ever get that hamster 

out of your ass??" If they have name tags, even better.



Yell to a stupid schmuck who bought that god-awful McDonalds coffee or other

breakfast food, "Ya, Ah youst ta work at Mceedees! They put all sorts o hair

in their coffee. They also put spider eggs in their cinnamon rolls and kitty 

liter in their hash browns!! Some guy even found a finger in one o dem 

breakfast burritos..." No matter how hungary they are, they won't be able to 

eat another bite and they'll put some hair in their coffee so they can sue 

Mc's.



		   SURE-FIRE WAYS TO GET YOURSELF KILLED



Yell at the biker with a shotgun.



Find some gang members who are sitting there loading up some guns and yell,

"Bamm........Ya g! You ain't no homie from the hood!! Oh ya, AND I DID YOUR

MOMA!!" Keep this up until they spray your bus with an uzi.



Find some hics in a 4x4 truck and yell, "Ya..uh..You..uh..Yoo stuphid 

bastard!! That peice oh shit is nothin compared to what ah got!! Why don't

you test my sayin and we'll RAM!" He'll ram your bus, hopefully, and either

your bus will withstand it and you can then get him to do it again, or you'll 

both cause a major traffic jam, and a few extra deaths/injuries.



You know that pesky emergency door in the back? Well, when you've beaten the

alarm, just wait till you're stopped, and jump out. Or you can jump while the 

bus is moving and that semi is behind you, if you don't feel you have alot to 

live for. Another thing is to open it up and throw other students out. (Great 

for getting rid of enemies)



		      THINGS TO DO TO THE BUS DRIVER



Get everyone to sing, "Its a small world after all" over and over till your 

bus driver snaps, screams about everything bad in his/her life, and put the 

pedal to the medal and drive off the road and into your local movie theater 

thats playing Little white and the 7 dwarfs. Run up to the penthouse floor!! 

Rated XXX!



If the driver has a little cup handy to keep water, pepsi, exlax, etc.. Pour

hard liqour into this. When they come come to your stop she'll be like

"AH AIN'T PULLIN THIS BUS OVER!!" (swig,swig) "WE'RE GOING TA TEXAS TO SEE

PAPPY AND MOMMA!!" This is also hilarious until you realize she won't make it 

to texas without crashing through a few biuldings. If your lucky, she'll pass 

out and you can drive.



When there is a Semi behind you and your on the freeway, yell to the bus 

driver "Hey OH MY GOD!! THERE IS A LITTLE BOY/GIRL/BABY/PUPPY/(other) IN THE

MIDDLE OF THE ROAD DEAD AHEAD! STOP THE BUS!! QUICK!" Either she'll stop and 

the semi will propell us to flip, go on, or if the bus is sideways when she 

tries to miss the invisible infant, it will seperate us in half. (COOL) Or she 

won't stop. In this case, make two large thumping noises and watch her eyes 

get real big, and then she'll open the door and jump out, sacrificing herself 

for her bad, bad deed.



Take a bunch of marbles and just dump them on the floor. They should travel

all the way up to the bus drivers seat. This will create a neat effect. She 

either won't be able to step on the brakes or will just totally freak and 

drive into some elderly home.



By now you should have either been banned from all the buses or killed in an

accident. Hope your not the latter and you enjoyed this peice of crap file..



This file is for humor purposes only. Blah Blah Blah. I really don't expect

you to open the back door and fling people out of it. But that makes your day, 

be my guest.





??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

?                          CuervoCon Announcement                            ?

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????



     CUERVOCON 96 CUERVOCON 96 CUERVOCON 96 CUERVOCON 96 CUERVOCON 96



		  Tengo que hable con mi abogado.



     ----------------------------------------------------------------



What : A computer/telephony/security conference. (show this part to your

       boss.)



Where: Fort Brown Hotel, Brownsville Texas.



When : 28 & 29 December, 1996



Who  : The usual gang of cretins.



Why  : It's winter, and it is 12 degrees outside.  The dumpsters are frozen

       shut, and there are icicles on the payphones.  Brownsville is at the

       Southern-most tip of Texas, right up against...Mexico.  Yes, Mexico,

       land of cheap cerveza, four-dollar strippers, and liberal drinking

       laws.  Mexico, where you too can own your very own Federal law

       enforcement official for a fistful of pesos.



     ----------------------------------------------------------------



			      Speakers



Anybody wishing to speak at CuervoCon should send e-mail to the address at the

bottom of this announcement. Currently the list includes:

u4ea (by teleconfrence)

Major

Caffiend (About her Breasts)



     ----------------------------------------------------------------



			       Events



"How Much Can You Drink?"

"Fool The Lamer"

"Hack The Stripper"

"Hack The Web Server"

"sk00l"

"Ouija Board Hacking"



...as well as a variety of Technical Presentations.





     ----------------------------------------------------------------





			 General Information





The Fort Brown Hotel will have available to us 125 rooms at the holiday in @

$55 a room, and 75 rooms at the ramada for $45 each. The Fort Brown was

previously an actual fort when it was closed down by uncle sam. It became one 

large hotel until it was recently purchased and split into the Holiday Inn and 

the Ramada. The Fort Brown was chosen because it is across the street from the

bridge to Mexico. You can call the Fort Brown Ramada at: 210-541-2921 You can

call the Fort Brown Holiday Inn at: 210-546-2201 Call for reservations, make

sure to tell them you're with CuervoCon.



The con room or as the hotel named it, almost seems like for us, The "fortress

room" is ours on Satruday until 4pm, and all day Sun. If there is a problem

with regards to the 4pm Saturday issue, they will set us up at the convention

center free of charge , but that is away from the hotel, so we are hoping

there after 4pm crap will clear up and let us in. We are going to get it

opened on Friday night so we can hang around in it.



Brownsville is right on the Mexican border, adjacent to the Mexican town

Matamoris.  The Gulf of Mexico is 25 miles away.  Brownsville has a

population just over 100,000.  The police force includes 175 officers,

and a wide variety of federal law enforcement agencies have a strong

presence there as well.  The climate is semi-tropical, and the RBOC is

SouthWestern Bell.



Matamoris is the other half of brownsville. Home of over 1/2 a million people,

it is known since the early 1900's as a pit of sin. The federale's are not to

be fucked with and it is serviced by TelMex. It is known for it's bars, strip

clubs and Mexican food. Matamoros also has an airport in case you live in

Mexico and care to go, via Aeromexico.



Directions:

In Texas Driving - Go anyway you can to get to US 77 South. Take 77 South

till it ends in Brownsville. From there you will turn right on International.

Proceed all the way down international, right before the bridge, turn left.

The Fort Brown will be on the left.



For those flying in - We are going to try to have a shuttle going. Also just

tell the cab driver, Fort Brown.



     ----------------------------------------------------------------



		       Celebrity Endorsements







Here's what last years participants had to say about CuervoCon:



"I attended the CuervoCon 95.  I found many people there who, fearing a

 sunburn, wanted to buy my t-shirts!" -ErikB



"I tried to attend, but was thwarted by "No Admittance to The Public"

 sign.  I feel as though I missed the event of the year." - The Public



"mmmm...look at all the little Mexican boys..." -Netta Gilboa



"mmmm...look at all the little Mexican boys..." -Emmanuel Goldstein



"Wow!  CuervoCon 95 was more fun that spilling my guts to the feds!" -

 Panther Modern



"CuervoCon is our favorite annual event.  We know we can give

 security a day of rest, because you people are all too drunk to

 give us any trouble..." - AT&T



"No moleste, por favor." - TeleMex



Don't miss it!



     ----------------------------------------------------------------





Have you ever hacked a machine in your hometown from a foreign

country?



Have you ever had to convert dollars into pesos to get your bribe right?



Have you ever spent time in a foreign prison, where your "rights as an

American" just don't apply?



Have you ever been taken down for soemthing that wasn't even illegal

half an hour ago?



YOU WILL!  And the con that will bring it to you?



CUERVOCON 96



     ----------------------------------------------------------------



     CUERVOCON 96 CUERVOCON 96 CUERVOCON 96 CUERVOCON 96 CUERVOCON 96

			    brought to you by

     - S.o.B. - TNo - PLA - Phrack - The Guild - F.U.C.K. - SotMESC -





			  Contact Information



info@cuervocon.org   

www.cuervocon.org - Look here for updates.

Voice mail system coming up soon.



??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

?                                 Letters                                    ?

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Ever wanted to bug the HELL out of sombody ? Intel has made this oh so easy.

In a few steps you'll be on your way to deliberately pissing sombody off.



1. Dial 1-800-321-4044

2. Press 2 (It will start ringing)

3. Wait for intel sound and press 2

4. Wait for beep, Press 2

5. Wait for beep, Press 2

6. Enter number for whom you wish to have them fax AREA CODE FIRST then

   press 1

7. Wait for beep. Press 3

8. Hang up and Intel will start calling this person 3 times at 3 min

   intervials



The Red Boxer  

pme96@juno.com



  [This kind of reminds me of the time I used U.S.West's faxback service and I couldn't

   get my fax software to work right and U.S.West wouldn't stop until I successfully

   received it. I spent two hours trying to get a fax just so my phone would stop

   ringing. You're right, a faxback number is the perfect tool for harassment and I

   think I'll try to put together a rather large list of them in the next quarterly

   phone directory. Everyone, find a faxback number and e-mail it to me NOW.]



				------------





hey... i got some cool #'s for the PLA directory. My friend and I read 

your issue about taking over the Fred Myers store. Well, we went to 

Lowe's (a hardware store) and noticed a fone there. we turned over the 

little sheet that gives the ext #'s and it had PAGING on there. ususally 

you just press PAGE on the fone, but this wont work from an outside fone 

obviously. so you ask for ext. 89 and sometimes they'll connect you. Most 

of the time though, they'll tell you they only have 3 digit exts. To get 

around this, you just say something like the front desk told me this is 

the ext. i needed to get. They'll usually connect you then. or ask for 890.



one time the guy connected me to security! Oh no! He asked what I was 

trying to do. I said "get ext. 89" he replied "that's our paging system" 

so i said in a deep ,suspicious voice. "exactly" well i guess he hung up 

on me or something. the # is (704) 543 5600 . One good thing about this is 

that the intercom is REAL loud. you can here it from across the parking lot. 

it SO loud we can almost hear it from across the school. 



Burke F.



				------------

Waddap Redbox...



Well after viewing your list of *interesting* operator comments, I thought

I'd add some stuff that I've heard.  These all happened in New York City

while attending the 2600 meeting there, go figure...



"Aww come on kid, you can do better than that!"

"Sir, you might try putting in real coins next time."

"Those tones seem a little off, you might want to tune your box."

"Nynex supervisor.  Sir, if you want to make a call, you should really try

 and stop ripping us off."



Happily hacking in NJ, 

Phear





				------------



RBCP,

On pla 42 could you put a note on it somewhere to send all virii, 

harassing letter's and big files to take up hard drive to 

walters@tcoe.trinity.k12.ca.us. Oh ya and tell the people to include 

the message "Send a picture of yourself to Jeff!".  I just love to piss 

her off!



Thanks, 

Jeff 







??????????????Contact?The?Phone?Losers?Of?America?Nearest?You!????????????????

?  etext.archive.umich.edu............................pub/Zines/PhoneLosers  ?

?  ftp.fc.net................................................pub/defcon/PLA  ?

?  bueno@peak.org.........................................RedBoxChiliPepper  ?

?  roy@icsi.interconnect.net.............................Zak a.k.a. el_jefe  ?

?  collcard@big12.metrobbs.com......................To contact Colleen Card  ?

?  apok0lyp@i1.net................................................Apok0lyps  ?

?  http://peak.org/~bueno/pla.html.........Phone Losers of America Homepage  ?

?  http://www.geocities.com/timessquare/3237/pla.html...........Virgina PLA  ?

?  http://www.geocities.com/SiliconValley/Pines/3411/..........Bay Area PLA  ?

?  http://homepage.macomb.com/~syfert/pla/.........Phone Losers of Illinois  ?

?  http://www.geocities.com/SiliconValley/5937/...Phone Losers of Wisconsin  ?

?  http://www.pancreas.com/libs/pla.htm...........THe FLoaTinG PanCReaS BBS  ?

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????