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 '##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!!
  ##:::: ##::'##.. ##:: ##.....:: ===========================================
  ##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #387 !!
  #########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS!  !!
  ##.... ##: ##:::: ##: ##...:::: ===========================================
  ##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "A Goat Named Abel"                      !!
  ##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> Kreid                              !!
 ..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 12/28/98                                 !!
 !!========================================================================!!

        hello.  kreid here.  this is a story i wrote several years ago.
 it's one of the first short stories i wrote, just after i decided to try
 to take my writing seriously.  mogel found it and i told him to put it
 in hoe.  it's not a bad story, i think.  but... whatever.  enjoy it.

 --(not likely)------------------------------------------------------------
 
        once, in a not-too-distant past, there was a goat named abel.
 abel was a decent goat, he respected his elders; but he had his sins.
 mostly sins of the mind, of course, abel kept to himself... but his
 thoughts were bad.  his thoughts were dangerous.

        abel questioned god.  how does god feel about the modern goat,
 with all this medicine and technology?  why are we worshipping a concept
 invented by ancient man-- a society that knew nothing about their own
 environment?! abel didn't know whether to feel proud or guilty for all
 his insight.  did other goats think like me?  am i going to hell for
 these thoughts?

        abel just didn't know.  sometimes he didn't even care, with all
 the pressure his free will gave him.  "you know," thought abel one day,
 "most goats probably think like me.  i'm not all that wise.  i shouldn't
 feel guilty for thoughts that come naturally too me.  fuck this."  and
 with that, abel gave up his fear of god.  "fuck god.  fuck everything."
 abel's mind was made up.  no more believing ridiculous lies.  if
 something sounded awkward, he would QUESTION it.

	abel's life went uphill from there.  he no longer thought he was
 smarter than everyone else... and he socialized with the other goats, he
 conversed with them intelligently.  he spent his life as a young adult
 collecting knowledge, and the town's goats loved him.  life was good.

	as he reached middle age, he became a teacher.  he took in some
 younger goats as students, and made them wise.  he taught the goats to
 think.  but the older goats didn't like this thinking business.  abel
 was becoming a bad influence to the youth of his town, and the
 government wouldn't stand for it.  abel's dangerous wisdom had come
 back, and he was in trouble.

        on abel's 60th birthday, he went to the legendary tin can oracle
 on mount spoon.  after a few minutes of waiting, the can greeted him.

	"who goes there?" asked the can.

	"it is i, abel the goat."

	"what question shall you ask me, abel?"

	"i wish to know who the wisest goat on earth is."

	"THERE IS NONE WISER THAN ABEL!" the can boomed.

        abel was shocked.  was he really the wisest goat on earth?  he
 did not think of himself as wise at all.  "no," he thought, "this
 cannot be true.  the oracle is mistaken."

	so abel searched the land, to solve this riddle.  "there must be
 someone who is wiser than i," thought abel, "and i will find him."  but
 abel could not find a single wise goat in all his searching.  he went to
 many prophets and politicians who thought they were quite wise, but the
 perceptive abel disproved their wisdom.  as abel found, the ones that
 thought they were most wise turned out to be most dense.

        with that thought, abel realized the truth of the oracle.  "if i
 am the wisest goat on earth," he thought, "then wisdom must be the
 realization that no one is wise in comparison to god."  he paused for
 a moment.  "yes.  that must be the answer."

	so abel was an enlightened goat.  he was finally at peace with
 himself and his wisdom.  and he taught more, but not for long.  during
 his searching he had humiliated many politicians and powerful goats.
 the people were jealous of abel's wisdom.  and that was his downfall.

        he was tried a week later and sentenced to death for corrupting
 the town's youth.  when asked to suggest an alternate sentence, he
 chuckled and said, "i propose a fee of one penny."  the crowd of goats
 booed, and he was bound in chains for the rest of the day.  when a young
 goat snuck up to him that night and offered for him to escape, he
 rejected the offer.  "by living in this town, i agreed to live by its
 laws," said abel, "trying to evade its law would be wrong.  i would be a
 hypocrite for doing so."  a tear was shed and the young goat waved
 goodbye to abel.

        the next morning, he was approached with a goblet full of poison
 and told to take a sip and then leave town to die.  abel smiled, drank
 deeply, and walked out the town gate into the burning desert.  his body
 was found the next morning, ten miles from the town, dead... with not a
 trace of sorrow on his withered face.

 !!========================================================================!!
 !! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS!      #387 - WRITTEN BY: KREID - 12/28/98 !!