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2022-03-02
It seems like just yesterday I was celebrating my new year by shivering on the couch, under a blanket, sick with COVID. February flew by and Lent is upon us. The readings at Mass this Sunday moved me particularly strongly this year to go the extra mile during this Lenten season. To go a bit further than just giving up chocolate or swearing or something.
Sirach 27:4-7
When a sieve is shaken, the husks appear; so do one's faults when one speaks. As the test of what the potter molds is in the furnace, so in tribulation is the test of the just. The fruit of a tree shows the care it has had; so too does one's speech disclose the bent of one's mind. Praise no one before he speaks, for it is then that people are tested.
1 Corinthians 15:54-58
Brothers and sisters: When this which is corruptible clothes itself with incorruptibility and this which is mortal clothes itself with immortality, then the word that is written shall come about:
Death is swallowed up in victory.
Where, O death, is your victory?
Where, O death, is your sting?
The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
Therefore, my beloved brothers and sisters, be firm, steadfast, always fully devoted to the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain.
Jesus told his disciples a parable, "Can a blind person guide a blind person? Will not both fall into a pit? No disciple is superior to the teacher; but when fully trained, every disciple will be like his teacher. Why do you notice the splinter in your brother's eye, but do not perceive the wooden beam in your own? How can you say to your brother, 'Brother, let me remove that splinter in your eye,' when you do not even notice the wooden beam in your own eye? You hypocrite! Remove the wooden beam from your eye first; then you will see clearly to remove the splinter in your brother's eye.
"A good tree does not bear rotten fruit, nor does a rotten tree bear good fruit. For every tree is known by its own fruit. For people do not pick figs from thorn bushes, nor do they gather grapes from brambles. A good person out of the store of goodness in his heart produces good, but an evil person out of a store of evil produces evil; for from the fullness of the heart the mouth speaks."
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The first reading hit me like a brick. I've been doing a lot of ranting on here on this gemlog lately. While I have made an effort to be more charitable and less angry, it's still not good enough. What does my speech say about my soul? Maybe God is telling me it would be good for me to take a walk into the desert and reflect.
I've been feeling stressed and agitated at home and at work. My coworkers seem to talk to me less lately. Is my frustration showing in my speech, in my demeanor? When I hear people talk about COVID at work, I hear insane ignorance in both directions. Sometimes at the same time! I overheard two talking about how Dr. Robert Malone was a conspiracy theorist while both of them were wearing cloth masks with their noses sticking out. I don't know anything about Dr. Malone but I guarantee they don't know anything either, besides whatever lies were given to them by CNN and Facebook. Everything about COVID has been driving me nuts for over two years now. I need to disconnect from it. Now is a good time since the rules are being relaxed by our technocratic overlords... Here I go again.
I need to disconnect from the madness of this modern world as much as possible.
During Lent this year, I will be cutting out what I think are the largest distractions in my life. I hope that by removing these things it will help me slow down and focus on the present more. A bit of a digital detox. With the noise level on life dialed down to a minimum, I hope that with prayer and fasting, I will be able to better discern God's will and reorient myself in the proper direction.
On top of having some quiet time to reflect and pray. Maybe not taking in agitating political media all day will free up time for things I actually enjoy - working on Python projects, reading, playing my guitar.
I expect the fasting the be the most difficult penance. After a few days, I am sure I will get used to the lack of political media. I'll just listen to the Lord Of The Rings audiobooks on my commute instead. But going hungry will be hard. So I will keep the last verse of the second reading above in my pocket.