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? ?? ?? ?????? ???????? ? Vaginal and Anal Secretions Newsletter ?
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? ?? ?? ???????? ???????? ? Issue #96 - December 10, 1994 ?
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? ???? ?? ?? ???????? ? [ Written By: Jeffery Dahmer ] ?
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? PhUn WiTh OlD Pe0pLe ?
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You may be asking, why fuck with old people?, there so weak and pathetic.
Why, because they are the biggest assholes in the world. We pay for there
lazy asses out of our paychecks as "Socialist Security" and do they thank us?
Fuck no! All they do is whine about everything young or middle aged people
do. They whine about how the driving age should be raised to 25, yet i have
seen little kidz that could drive better then them. And then there are those
pathetic old people that let themselves get so weak they can't lift a bag
with a 1/2 pound of lunchmeat in it (I work at a supermarket..). Being old
is no excuse for being weak. There are some old people that are still strong
because they exercise and are still cool and young inside, but they are few
and far between.
1. Steal there Socialist Security checks and watch them flip out. They will
spend every second of there lives demanding that they get there cash. Don't
Feel Guilty, They don't need it and they didn't earn it.. Your like Robin
Hood!
2. Steal a car from a MaC DaDDy HoMee G WiGGeR. They all got the BiG aSS
B00miN BaSS SpeaKeRz. NoW PArK iT OuTsIdE the persons home and pop in one of
the WiGGeRz Z00m IcE MC OG MoNeY GaNsTa T's tapes and set it on full blast.
Make sure the windows are down and you got ear plugs, or else you might get
paralyzed. Then take off. This also works on normal assholes, but old people
really hate it. You could also substitute slayer, as most are religous, but
that would waste a good tape. Don't feel Guilty, You stole the car from a
wigger.
3. Steal there pills and replace them with pill shaped cutouts of psyilocibin
or LSD in liquid caps. They arn't going to be able to tell the difference.
Don't feel Guilty, You just gave these people a good time for free!
4. If you work at a Super Market and one is whining at you for something
really stupid, like your hair length, fill one of there bags up with
everything they bought that is really heavy. Then quickly fill up a few
bags with light stuff and cover the heavy one up, cuz usually they check how
much the bags weigh. Don't feel guilty, Your making them get some exercise,
and it will hopefully give them a lesson in humility and they will not be
such assholes next time.
5. If they start whining to you about something lame like "MTV should be
kicked off TV!@!", tell thim something to the effect of "YEah, MTV sucks!
Those corporate jew bastards play lame trendy music. They need more satanic
death metal and punk shit". Don't feel guilty, you were agreeing with them.
6. Put some Nitro-Glycerin in there gas tanks. Now they will actually drive
the fucking speed limit for a change. Don't feel guilty, you are helping
traffic and they will get to there destination a lot faster.
7. Kidnap one of them and drive them out 10 miles away from there home. Drop
them off there naked. Make sure it is Winter. Don't feel guilty, they used
to walk home naked through 40 miles of snow, so this should be a walk in the
park for them.
8. Steal there goofy looking clothes that no one in there right mind would
wear and throw them in a pile. Soak this with gasoline and light it. Don't
feel Guilty, they need new GOOD clothes, and you were just reminding them.
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