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? ?? ? ????? ????? ? ?
? ? ?? ? ? ? ????? ? Vaginal and Anal Secretions Digest ?
? ??? ?? ? ????? ? ? Issue #91 - Released: August 21, 1993 ?
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? Burn-0ut Rebellion 93 ?
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? Author: The Pyschotic Pyrotic ? Official Size: 8,279 Bytes ?
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What the fuck are you doing? You have to pass our /</</<-kool quiz to make
sure you are a goddamned burnout. Don't take this if you do not listen to
metal.
What is the best metal band in the world?
1. Slayer, Misfits, Danzig, *-Death, etc..
2. GWAR, Ministry
3. White Zombie, Manowar, Pantera
4. Megadeath, Metallica
5. Guns and Roses, Queen
How much do you pay for your flannels?
1. under $5
2. between $5-10
3. between $11-15
4. between $16-19
5. $20 and over
What Shoes do you were?
1. Carolina Steel-toes, Jungle boots, othe combat boots
2. Converse, Cheap shoes
3. Hiking boots
4. Hiking shoes
5. NiKe's
3 and under- You are the real burnout and death incarnate. Whoever fucks
with you dies.
4-6 - You are a burn-out
7-9 - Your halfway there
10-12 - You are a lameass mother fucker who deserves to die. You are pissin
your pants right now because you discovered your not a burn-out. Go and
masturbate looking at naked pictures of your mom. Read on and listen to us
rip the hell out of you.
13+ - You don't even know what metal is. You spend most of your time having
some black guy ram his dick up your ass and acting cool. Well, your not. You
look up to wiggers.
Well, as most of you in High School know that there has been a large
growth in posers during last year. Yep, I have seen tons of them. There all
Preps/wiggers or ex- preps/wiggers. It appears we are becoming there next
"Fad". Are you guys out there going to do anything? I mean it sortof just
pisses me off when i see Preps in Designer Cross Colour Flannels and wiggers
with chain wallets. These people will always say there favorite groups are
Metallica, Megadeath and Guns and Posers. Nice fucking life. There have also
been 20+ new flannel companys that charge over 20 bux each. Who the fuck
would spend that much on a flannel. Yep our old freind, the prep. Shit, i
have gone through the mall a few times and everyone i saw with a flannel
walked in and out of Attivo and other prep shops. They all had pistons or
Nike shirts on.
There was a fat bitch who sat next to me in 1rst hour last year. Me and to
other people in back of me would always be ripping on her for being such a
fucking poser. She would always wear a flouresent(Yeah, real flannel there)
flannel halfway buttoned up, with some small cheap hiking shoes. Ok, here is
a conversation we had sometime.
TPP- What the fuck is this flouresent flannel bullshit?
Bitch- This flannel is cool. Stinky boots!
Note- I just got a pair of new Jungle Boots at the time, and that nasty
rubber smell was said to fill up the entire classroom. Only preps seemed to
smell it though.
TPP- Yeah IOU is so /</</<-/<o0l. Yeah i bet you like new metallica too.
Bitch- Yeah, i listen to Metallica and Megadeth
Nick(kid who sits behind me)- Poser Metal!
Everyone in the area- hheheheheehehh
There is this other guy who is a COMPLETE TOTAL poser. He is the biggest
fucking pussy. He challenged some guy to a fight and used Mace. Fucking wimp
pussy motherfucker. This fucker pretends he is stoned half the time. I have
seen him and 5 of his prep freinds at the bridge pretending to smoke. Never
inhaling, just sticking the cig in there mouths and pulling it out. Half the
time, the cigerettes weren't even lit. Nice Fucking life. And on top of that,
he's got a luke perry haircut with those sideburns so he can be a total rebel
, now.
Well, we cannot let this happen. These assholes are ruining every fucking
thing we stand for. Rip any unautorized flannels off and rip any poser
wallet-chain off. What the fuck are they going to do, there pussys. We must
find ways to use these people to further chaos. Here is...
Phun with Posers
1. So, you got some poser in your school who acts like he is stoned all the
time. Well get some oak leaves and sell it to him as marijuana or put a dot
of rubber cement or glue or somethin on a peice of paper, and sell it as
acid. It's not like he is actually going to use it, just act cool and show
it to his freinds. And you get Cash Cash Cash for nothing. And what could
you ever get busted for? Selling glue and leaves?
2. Card shit to There address.
3. Write one of your reports on how Metallica sucks. Make sure it is in a
class filled with posers. hehe They started calling me a churchboy...
4. Lock them up in the basement and see if there flannels glow in the dark.
5. Go into there can with your beige box, and tape there phone calls.
Perfect Blackmail shit. For instance, i heard some poser chick talk about
how she was having a seance on Acid and her refridgerater started talking
to her and her teddy bear chased them with a knife. And then some call to a
burnout at my school that she says she is friends with. He ripped on her for
about a half an hour.
6. Napalm them.
7. Take him to a docter appointment. When there check off "Neuter" on his
form, while he isn't looking. Hey what does he need a dick for, he's a hand
lotion and palm jelly boy. Imagine his surprise when he wakes up.
8. Sell him naked pictures of his mom for masturbation aids.
9. Get invited overnight to there house and raid the place. Don't make it
look obvious, don't brake anything. Just take what they got. Most of the
posers are rich preps, so they should have lots of stuff. Burn all there
flannels and prep clothes.
10. Take them down to someplace like Garden City and see how long it takes
for them to be beaten to a bloody pulp.
11. Get like 5-10 of your freinds, and go to the mall. Hang out in those
prep stores like Mary go Round and Attivo. Scare the shit out of everyone
there. Tell me if one of those commisioned annoying salespeople comes up to
your group and asks what you want to buy. Always talk about Slayer, Satan,
Skinheads, how rap sucks really loudly. So everyone will avoid you. If the
mall cops try to do anything, sue the fuckers.
12. When you get a new pair of boots, wear them all the time. The Smell that
is supposedly there annoys the shit out of preps. They spent all hour
complaining about it.
Well thats all for this issue.. Phreak the World!
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