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? Vaginal and Anal Secretions Newsletter #0005 ?
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? Date Released : [05/12/92] Author: The Gas Station Attendant ?
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? Some Fun Stuff You Can Do At School ?
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Aghh its me again, here with some more sick and twisted text for all
you freaks out there. I guess our first issue was pretty sick, so I'll try
to keep this particular issue a little tamer... Anyhow here are some good
suggestions for the uncreative person to try at school...
1] Go to school naked.
2] Slay a bunch of squirrels, rabbits, cats, dogs, cows, horses, people, etc,
and scatter the dead mangled bodies all over the front couryard of your
school and draw pentegrams with either blood or red spray paint.
3] Draw a white chalk outline in on the front sidewalk of school and pour
some ketchup in the middle of it, rubbing it down into the cement to
create a nice stain. This will look an awful lot like a murder scene. For
added realism steal some construction tape <the stuff they put around
your driveway when you get it repaved> around it to make it look like
a police line heh.
4] Wait till you have a substitute teacher, have the whole class except for
one person you hate come 15 minutes late to class. We did this once, and
then you all rush in at once running so he cant mark who all is tardy heh.
Just tell him you were there and that he must have missed you.
5] Get mail order crickets <these can be had for about $14/1000 mail order
or around $1.50/dozen at local pet stores> and bring them to school,
letting them loose during lunch or something, they look an awful lot
like cockroaches.
6] Start writing and passing around an underground newsletter containing the
numbers of phone sex, look up all your principals and teachers and put
them in there too <be careful not to leave too many clues , i made this
mistake once, i put a bunch of my teachers and my principal, i got a 3
day suspension, but oh well>. Of course you need racist articles and
stories about fags at school and spreading rumors that people have aids
and shit (People are easily maniupated by the press).
7] Bring some sort of farm animal to school , and try to get a visitor's
pass for it <tell them its your cousin from alabama or something>. Or
you can just let it loose in the hallways and watch the chaos. Dont
get a dog or cat, they are too 'cute' .. and too expensive. Get a pig
or better yet , wait till thanksgiving, find a local turkey farm and buy
some turkeys. Snakes, Mice, and squirrels will just get stepped on or
picked up by some teacher.
8] Come to school late, break into someones locker, pack it full with those
damn styrofoam peanuts, crumpled up paper, underwear, used condoms, shit,
grass clippings, but make sure to pack it TIGHT. Now take lots of newspaper
and duct-tape that over the opening, while the locker is still open. Now
use caulking and seal the locker airtight. Of course you want to cover the
front with balloons, and put a padlock on the handle so they have to get
it cut off.
9] Go around, get behind people when they open up their locker, and watch
them enter their combo. After they leave, write the combo in LARGE letters
with a black permenant marker, or better yet, carve it in with a knife.
10] Shit in the sinks in the bathroom.
11] Fill the drains of the sinks with toilet paper, and just turn them all on,
and take off... after a while there will be quite a flood.
12] If you have the nerve to do this, when giving an oral report in front of
the class, just piss your pants, or drink caster oil and make yourself
vomit all over the place.
13] Put superglue and tothpicks in the locks of your classes before school.
I would suggest the 5 minute 2-ton epoxy glue, it dries quite quickly,
make sure to get all the rooms around it so it doesnt look like it was
all singled out.
14] Take bleach and write nice messages on your schools front lawn. Be sure
to use lots of bleach and make big letters, this works quite nice by
leaving dead brown grass wherever bleach was pored.
15] Take a garbage can full of broken bottles and spread them all over the
football field, next time someone gets tackled, they get sliced and
diced into confetti.
16] Order pizzas to your principal. Amazingly enough, most pizza places will
deliver to schools. <I was present in my school office when 8 large
pizzas came into the school to the principal heh>.
17] Steal a carphone, and if your teacher has his own office with a phone,
discretly dial the phone, and call his office. Then give him death
threats, tell him when he leaves the classroom after this hour he's dead.
of course ALL suspicion will be off you since you were sitting in the
class the whole time heh.
18] Check out library books <lots of them, big expensive ones, encylopedias,
atlases, etc> in other students names and burn them. You will probably
need their student id# to do this, just look in the teachers grade
books.
19] Spend some time in the AV room switching all the geography movies with
such fine movies as "Deep throat", "Debbie Does Dallas", "Calugila", etc.
20] Do book reports on such fine reading material as the Kama Sutra, or
Everything you ever wanted to know about sex.
21] When you have subs for your last class of the day, wait till they take
attendence and just leave. I have done this before, sometimes if you
skip, they dont even mark you absent even if you never show up. This
works best if you have a class where everyone is up and moving about,
like metal shop or art class or something.
I hope you like some of these ideas, if we get any requests, I can print
millions more. These are just suggestions of stuff you can do if you want to
have some fun. I have done 4,5,6,9,11,13,14,18, and 21. The rest are up to
you to try...
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