💾 Archived View for gemini.spam.works › mirrors › textfiles › magazines › UXU › uxu-579.txt captured on 2022-06-12 at 15:18:21.
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Underground eXperts United
Presents...
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[ Eden ] [ By Freon ]
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Eden
by Freon
the sand falls through the air
clear sparkling in a bright sun
the surf rolls in and i feel as a bird
riding on the updrafts
the buffeting of the warm air
on my wings my chest
my soul
and i am a man
and i can feel these things
and i can understand these things
these things that i can never truly experience
and the first word i speak will destroy my understanding
and the first club i raise will destroy the things i love
and there is no use for a word
no use for an utterance
but a murmur of joy unclear undefined
they know what i mean
the things i love
and they murmur with me
and i can hear them
just as they hear me
the palms shade i use as my tool
a gentle tool that brings me but pleasure
and cool
in the beautiful sun
i lie on the beach and feel its love for me
is the same for my love for it
the sand against my skin
cradles me like my mothers arms
but the first cloth i wear will destroy my understanding
the first clay pot will destroy the things i love
and there is no use for a cloth
no use for a cover for my body
but the skin that is part of me
that i am a part of
alive bronzed comfortable
against whatever is inside of me
be it flesh or bone or blood or spirit
i am all and more pressed against it cannot add to me
robes kill my spirit and my freedom
i am alone and happy within myself
and safe and happy with all my friends
the old and wise
the young and strong
all so equally valued for just being alive
by the others who show their appreciation
by being alive themselves
by being different and unique
not trying to fit in
with anything that is expected
because nothing is expected but that they be themselves
and the first man i strike will destroy my understanding
the first war i wage will destroy the things i love
and there is no use for hostility
but a friendly companionable jostling
joking scuffles in the sand with friends
competition demonstration of strength and skill
but all in good will for this man i pin to the sand
for my strength shall be used to defend him when needed
and he knows
and i know
that we are not fighting but showing
how well we will protect each other
and how well we will protect our brothers
when the time comes
and we know it will come
and the first God i beg for aid will destroy my understanding
my first sacrifice unto Him will destroy the things i love
there is no use for a God
no use for an imaginary saviour
as i lick the sweat from my goddess's breast
and inside her
inside her my eternal life will grow
and be born to this world of a million different colours
this world of a million different sounds
a million different tastes
a million different smells
a million different emotions
and not one name
not one blasphemous sacreligious name or label or category
to tear the meaning from the things i love themselves
to rip my very heart out through my very mouth
each time it falls open to emit
another precise moronic utterance
about the so called science that i would cling to
if this understanding was gone
but if this understanding was gone
what would there be to teach my children
what could i teach them that they did not already know
that i was a failure
a freak of nature
destroyed by my own arrogance
glorified by my words
and numbers
and ingenious inventions
that reduce me to a grovelling vomiting wreck
or a cripple before a television screen
or a mass murderer of animals to feed my obsession with gore
or a murderer of men with my clean and oiled gun
see how it sparkles when in the sun my boy
whose rays i have poisoned with my cleverness
see how it bangs and we can hear the sound
desensitised as our ears have become
by the roaring of our own applause
for our rotting selves
see how it tears the flesh and shatters the bone
of the bird or deer or fox whose understanding we envy so
see how i clean it with my leather cloth
ripped from the hide of a herbivore
so much like myself
but so different because it is convenient for me to think so
while i smash its skull with a captive bolt pistol
and wrench out brain tissue with a wire
cut its throat and hang it by the feet
wait for it to drain
no
without words i will teach my son
and without words he will answer
that he loves me in a way that words
in their clumsy overgeneralising foolishness
cannot hope to describe or replace
but still try
and i will not send my son
to be instructed by men and women i have never met
men and women i will never know
and who will never know my son
as my mate and i will always know him
and i will not test my son
to see that he has learned enough
if he doesnt he will die
that is the rule
that he knows when he is born
so he will learn
and the first test i devise will destroy my understanding
the first school i found will destroy the things i love
and there is no use for a test
no use for an insubstantial measurement
of this living breathing child
this man like me that i have helped create
this man who has helped without even trying
to make me a man
this man who is to me as i was to my father
though i am old now and my father is gone
and there are no moans and wails
as we carry him to the cliffs
no black stinking death machines
no gilded shovel handles
no self important ministers
no preaching on a corpse
no rebirth into eternal life
no eternal bliss
this is how it is
this is how it has always been
this is how it will always be
no one need say it we all know
and we lay him on the clifftop
perhaps he will return
not buried in a fatal grave
if he is not dead he will return to scold us
with gentle knocks around the head
playful fistfuls of sand tossed carefully to avoid the eyes
as he did when i was young
and he was alive
and we shall return and live
on our beach by the sea
in the sand and trees
until we too are carried away
to the clifftop where the bones grow white
and the scavengers feed on our useless dead flesh
before the grass and weeds claim all
in time
and the first medicine i mix will destroy my understanding
and the first disease i cure will destroy the things i love
and there is no use for a medicine
a destroyer of the meaning of illness
a perverter of the course of life
a product of sick experiments
on other things i love
just to sustain my existence
perhaps
another day
or two
and though my bones are brittle
and though my legs are weak
and though my heart does pain me
and though my breathing rasps
i am old and it is better
at this time in my life
to die from a disease
than from a side effect
and the first breath i took destroyed my understanding
and the last breath i exhale will destroy the things i love
and there is no use for breath
no use for another drawing of the air
of this still green world
this still beautful world
this still unpoisoned world
this still untainted world
this still inhabited world
where no man laughs when a friend is suffering
where no man takes lives but to save his own
or the lives of the ones he loves
where no man travels far beyond his home in hope of plunder
where no man enslaves another
where no man pollutes anothers air or water
where no man crashes through life with his raucous yelling
of a salvation beyond
where no man rots the minds of others with preaching
where no man feels his mind rot from idleness
where no sense is dulled
no mind is unclear
no heart is broken
no body is tainted with drugs
no teeth rot out from bad food
no lungs rot out from bad air
no livers rot out from bad water
no lives rot from hateful thoughts
because no words are spoken
because no words are known
and this is as it has always been
as it is
and as it will not always be
and the first word i speak will destroy my understanding
and the first book i write will destroy the things i love
and there is no use for a word
a meaningless broken metaphor
for the feelings of my friends
and their tears of joy and pain combined
and their hopes and dreams and futures
their loves and hates and lives and deaths
as they lay me on the clifftop
now that i have breathed my last
http://www.nkpwhq.com/~freon/
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uXu #579 Underground eXperts United 2001 uXu #579
http://uXu.org/
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