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presents
An Interview with The Streptococci
Toxic File #91
by Gross Genitalia
Centre of Eternity 615.552.5747 40mg/750+ files 12/2400 baud HQ of Toxic Shock
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The following is collection of interviews taken by penicillin mold spores
passing down my throat during a recent sore throat of mine.
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PENICILLIN: Grettings to all you ugly streptococci sons of bitches. Despite the
fact that we are here to kill you, we also are here to interview you, and
perhaps find out a bit more about your lifestyles. We will begin with you,
strep #1. What is it like to be a part of the great big cocci family of
bacteria?
S #1: Well, quite frankly it sucks. As you know we have a somewhat "iffy"
life, we never know when we will get the mood to attack some human
bastard and attack it in hopes of killing it. So you live one moment
to the next, respiring involuntarily, never knowing what your future will
be.
P: As for these "moods", is this somewhat an explanation for invariably
attacking your prey? Your answer #2.
S #2: Well I guess so. One minute you're lounging in Jamaica, the next
minute a damned typhoon strikes and the wind picks you up and carries you
for hundreds of miles. All that dangerous work of trying to scarf an
eel's epidermal cells, all shot to hell by a TYPHOON. So you get pretty
pissed and a mood comes about to attack a human.
P: But why don't you ever get these "moods to attack" while not pissed?
S #2: Well, we'd all actually much rather engage in kinky sex and reproduce
than to attack people. Sometimes we have a little trouble "getting
that rise," and it pisses us off. So we attack humans and get that
warm gooey throat place that makes us feel as if on a bed of jism and
we have no trouble spurting away.
P: But don't you reproduce asexually?
S #2: True, but we've devised a new method of attachment that allows us to
fulfill our utmost pleasures while leeching off the agonistic bodies
of human beings.
P: Aren't you guys a little small for sex?
S #3: Yes, and obviously none of us have ever achieved orgasm. So in our
undying horny quest for pleasure, we constantly seek out sex as a form
of relief in these our trying times of nonejaculation.
P: On a more personal note, how do streptococci like yourselves feel about
us penicillin molds?
S #1: You tacky sons of bitches can go fuck yourself for all we care. Well, I
guess that's not possible but try it sometime anyway. You are a threat
and a menace to our society. Piss off you pigslime bastards.
P: Well all fine and dandy. <A passing spore obliterated Strep #1.) Onto
another facet of your existence, how does it make you feel that you are
tantalizing other living organisms with sickness and pain?
S #2: It's because of bastards like you guys that we keep on going in our
struggle to keep the existence of our race, always devoted to the
quest for sex as a means to keep our survival.
A traitorous spore grabs Strep #2 and they engage in bacterial sex. The
two organisms run off to the epiglottis to get married. Word reaches the Strep
existing in the throat that the two finally achieved orgasm and the rest of
the strep and penicillum spores rush to the epiglottis to experience the
forever-sought-after orgasm. However, Supreme Being swallows His spit and the
entire congregation is swept down His mighty Esophagus into a large cavern
and digested in a big pool of mushy stale burritos and hydrochloric acid.
With a last strain of bacterial and fungal life the two existences are
completely grossed out by all that snot dripping on them from the walls of
His cavern-pool and promptly cease to exist. The interviewer was inadvertently
fucked by a malformed streptococcus and was swept away with the others into
his Disgusting Doom.)
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(c)August 1990. TS/GrGen. #91.