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| There Ain't No Justice |
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| #77 |
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- Poetry Interlude 06 -
by the AC908/AC215 Poets Society
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Angelique
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-----------------------
In the Arms of a Friend
-----------------------
In the comfort of your arms,
there is the knowlege
that I can say
anything.
I can express my thoughts,
tell my innermost feelings,
and my deepest,
darkest, secrets.
There is no fear
when your arms encircle me.
Nothing ever said is wrong.
Even the silence is comfortable.
This is a magical, safe place.
Protected from the outside.
No problem is too great,
or too small.
There is a gentleness here
-and strength.
Like the quiet gurglings of a creek
that overcomes all
to reach the sea.
And a warmth that touches
to the deepest part of my soul.
As a fire in a hearth
on a cold, rainy, November night.
Then there is...
The security of knowing that
- even when i am wrong
I am loved.
I can pour out my heart.
With full confidence,
and complete trust.
For there is no one
who understands me
quite the way you do.
Sometimes...
You know my needs
before I do.
And sometimes
when I am difficult
I hear your voice close by
speaking as if to a child.
Its a calming, soothing sound.
A voice with the power to heal.
Physically, emotionally, spiritually,
as only you can.
In some ways,
I think you saved me.
Twice.
Once, when I was in a dark,
cold place,
called lonliness.
You reached out to me,
and held my hands,
over the years.
Then again,
when i was buried someplace far away
you brought me back into the sunlight
and onto my feet again.
What can I say to thank you?
My dear friend.
Words cannot fully say
what you've done for me.
You've given me
the strength to face the truth,
the courage to remember,
and the will to speak.
And then, I found peace,
in the comfort of your arms.
/////////////////////////////////*\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Ace Lightning
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--------------------
Time Enough For Love
--------------------
"listen," she said,
"it isn't as if
what I give to him
I take from you.
you act as if
you think he's getting
a bigger slice of cake
than you are.
don't you know?
there's enough of me
to go around!"
love divided
is love multiplied;
the more you love,
the more you can love,
and heaven knows
we all need the practice.
"listen," she said,
"I have time enough for you,
and time enough for him.
there's always
time enough for love.
and, since I love you,
and I love him,
I'd love it
if you could love each other,
at least a little bit."
love shared
is love squared,
and the love you take
is equal to the love
you make.
"listen," she said,
"if you'd both just stop
banging your antlers
and listen,
I know we can
get this straightened out
somehow."
and he listened,
and he listened,
and they both knew
she was right;
and then they
walked off down the beach,
hand in hand in hand.
--------
Brothers
--------
Somewhere out there they, too, stand,
Staring into the sky;
Chained to a dying star, perhaps,
Waiting for their turn to die;
Or breathing ammonia and methane
In a frozen, poisoned waste;
Or a pleasure-world's far Aidenn,
Knowing joys Man can never taste.
With tentacled eye-stalks they wonder,
Or probe with a sensory mind;
Like ours, their fantasies wander,
Leaving the home-world behind.
We may never meet the aliens,
Or know their unearthly race,
But they and we are brothers,
As our minds range the depths of space!
----------
Marginalia
----------
Radio transmitters,
lightning bolts,
and hearts enclosing a name;
On every page
of notes I take,
the margins look the same;
And couples
dancing, or kissing ?
Even I who draw them don't know ?
And vain attempts
to sketch his face,
scribbled over so they don't show.
Nobody ever
sees my notes,
and I'll never let anyone look ?
But he'd know I'm always
thinking of him,
if he ever opened my book!
But I'll never tell him ?
I love him too much ?
so he will never know,
And the margins of
the notes I take
is the only place it will show,
So I will keep
tormenting myself
and playing my stupid game,
With radio transmitters,
lightning bolts,
and hearts enclosing a name.
--------
Triplane
--------
These fragile wings were old when I was born;
I wonder that the engine still can run;
The fabric of the skin is thin and worn
From many years of rain and wind and sun.
They were our enemies then, but now no more;
Only the tales of heroes still remain,
The death and beauty of the First World War,
The brave and lovely deeds of man and plane.
To fly those frail machines took strength and skill,
And courage of a rare and special kind;
Fifty years later, I can see it still,
And pay them silent homage in my mind.
To see this antique plane against the sky
Sums up the things that drive a man to fly.
------------------------------
Postscript on an Envelope Flap
------------------------------
Open this envelope carefully, please.
Inside you will find
only a tattered scrap,
creased and worn and crumbling,
much like a clipping
that has been carried in a wallet too long.
Unfold it ? gently, gently! ?
smooth out its crumples,
and put it away in a safe place.
Once
it was my soul.
-------
Snow #1
-------
Snow sifts down from a silver-grey sky,
silent and soft and deep,
filling the squares of my window view
with a silence as soft as sleep;
I sit by the window and watch it snow,
Time has no meaning any more,
I float like a flake on the winter air,
suspended somewhere above the floor.
I've joined the snowflakes that fill the sky,
suspended and floating and free;
everything stops but the sifting snow,
time has no meaning for me....
----------------
The Magic Mirror
----------------
Look into the magic mirror, what do you see?
I saw my brother's face, looking back at me.
A different name, and a different face,
But my mirror-image, of my own race.
I reached out, and his hand was there,
And the mirror vanished like smoky air.
concrete corridors with outhouse breath
I never expected it to be sordid
but then after a while it wasn't
and I dared think forbidden thoughts
at the glimpse of the oneness
I had always hoped would be possible someday
pebbles grit under my elbows
I love you
I looked into the mirror and saw my very twin,
Looking out at me, just as I was looking in.
Lightning flashed across the mirror, lighting up the sky,
Lightning answered in my soul, and I knew the reason why.
But lightning was not mine to feel, forbidden to my soul;
I took one last look in the mirror, dark and clear and whole.
I tried to light a Candle, once;
I barely caught the Flame,
And watched It flicker into life;
And then I caught my breath and ? poof! ?
I blew It out agayn.
My mirror-image smiled at me in faith and love and trust;
I spoke a word; the mirror shattered into shining dust.
The mirror-view was lovely, and it tempted me astray,
So I had to break the mirror, and walk silently away.
My brother's face dissolved away in softly weeping rain ?
Reflection of my face, distorted by my brother's pain.
I am your sister; and we had best
put all thoughts of incest from our minds.
There is no magic mirror now, just fragments in a heap,
And I can only see my mirror-image in my sleep.
My brother has a sister now, a mirror of his own,
And I am loved from long before, so I am not alone.
I broke the magic mirror, and I know that I did right;
But my eyes smart with the sting of broken glass sometimes at night.
----------------
Hallucination #1
----------------
I woke up
early in the morning
you woke me
into a dream
into my life
you woke me
gently, gently
like the first
warm wind of spring
out of winter
a flower opens
softly waking
in the darkness
we dreamed awake
you and I together
until I slept
dreaming, and drowning in
your cannabis kiss.
---------------
Nightfall Again
---------------
One pair of feet crunching steps on floodlit concrete
but floodlights can't hold back the cold and darkness
alone in the wind while daylight drains out of the sky
and the lights along the road only make it darker
it's almost night and it's very cold ? the concrete is cold
but I have to keep walking or I'll never get home
it's a long way and I have to do it by myself
so I have to keep walking along the icy pavement
walking in the darkness from light to light
I will keep walking but it's such a long way
and it's so very cold and it's getting dark
and the only footsteps I can hear are my own.
The stars in their silent procession
made circles above the sea,
and there in the starlit silence,
I knew you were looking at me;
I looked at you looking, as we looked at the moon,
and the moon made a silvery track,
and the sand was all that heard us laugh,
and the sea would not let us go back.
------------
Stella Maris
------------
Our Lady Star of the Sea,
You sing in the surf's sound,
you sing inside seashells;
starfish and sand-dollars show your sign.
All life began in the sea;
simple single-celled organisms,
shellfish, swimming fish,
creatures that crawled onto the land;
and our blood is salty as sea-water.
We sail over the sea in ships,
we swim, we dive deep,
our submarines seek the secret abyss;
but still we have much to learn.
We fish your waters endlessly;
we kill your children,
whales and dolphins our cousins;
we pour out our poisons;
and still you endure.
Stella Maris, mermaid goddess,
Aphrodite, born of sea-foam,
Tiamat, Yemay?, we call you,
Our Lady Star of the Sea.
The sky is a loom, and the lightning,
like a shuttle, leaps to and fro,
Weaving a rainbow tapestry
with tassels of silver snow.
The fleece of clouds spins fine as silk,
strung on a frame of rain;
The colors are rare and marvelous,
the weave is strong and plain.
-------
SkyHome
-------
the sky is my home
i was born to fly
the sky is my home
my home is the sky
"take me home!" i cry
to the kite on the wind
to the silent sailplane soaring
through the little plane's propwash
through the jet's screaming roar
to the shuttle blasting spaceward
"please take me home
my home is the sky!"
i close my eyes
i sing of flight
my heart lifts
i leave the ground
i fall up into the stars
i soar with a rush
the sky embraces me
i am home at last
the sky is my home
i was born to fly
the sky is my home
my home is the sky
i
fly
high
/////////////////////////////////*\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
STARGAZER
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---------------
Life Bitter End
---------------
my heart will morn a thousand
for my friend stopped living today
we all feel so much sorrow
how can it end this way
not thinking of tomorrow
and the friends they left behind
finding out that life is short
and not always kind
/////////////////////////////////*\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Psychadelia
This bit was submitted in a rather freeform style,
which I will preserve. It adds to the intended mood, I think.
-TM
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---------------------------
the origination of nothing.
---------------------------
i know what i want
but how could i know?
i think i know,
but i cant be sure.
theres no way to check.
life is as pointless as death.
which rules out suicide.
searching, searching,
looking for the one of my dreams
not looking for a goddess, not looking for a genius
looking for someone like me
looking for a friend, but double that
and yes! i have found her!
but she isnt there. she dont care.
back to the searching
i wonder why im bothering with poetry. my 'poems' are so pathetic.
dont mind me, im just here for your bemusement.
when yer down, and paranoid, and too self-conscious..
when you dont know who you are..
just say..
you are..
"just this person.. ya know?"
works for me.
he says acid fucks you up.
he says acid enhances your life.
he says acid destroys your well-being.
he says acid shows you your true purpose.
i say acid is just a mirror. shows you yourself.
and a little more.
dont mind the acid stuff. im a little taken by it. explains the name, eh?
sitting by myself.
in the dark.
i cannot see, i cannot hear
i cannot taste, nor smell
i can not even feel.
i am deprived of my senses.
i start to dream.
i think i like it here.
bullshit isnt just mammal manure. its people trying to make themselves what
they are not. everyone does it. everyone is full of bullshit, except for those
who arent, and those are the exhalted ones.
isnt exhalted just a great word.
that was silly, i know. but hey, tough.
i wonder whos reading this. you are, of course. if you are actually reading
this, then i guess you are either trying to understand me, or you are
a lot like me. if you are trying to understand me, please mail me your
findings. im out of ideas. if you are a lot like me, well.. misery loves
company, eh?
maybe i should sit here and quote full song lyrics to try to express how i feel.
but that wouldnt be me, itd be <generic band>'s feelings. so thats just bad.
if you know who you are, congratulations. your one of the few.
everyone i talk to says not to be depressed. well i really dont have a choice
at the moment, so i midas well go with it.
the walls have been shattered
but the barrier remains.
no, im not on anything at the moment. sorry officer.
o/~ ...you aint been mindfucked yet.. o/~
darkness
surrounding me
i like it dark
the light awakens me
and im back to life
recalled to life
and im not overjoyed
WARNING:******: looking for a meaning in these poems is prohibited by LAW.
if you do, we'll have our thought police on you faster than you can say,
"ook".
what kind of stupid word is ook anyway. oh well. its just another word to
express another idea.
shes right there, so very close.
but very far away.
shes practically on my lap.
but she's miles apart.
theres something blocking us.
i cant tell what it is.
but, i can tell. i am ashamed.
lets see, who will get the horrible luck of reading this.
"explain myself? explain yourself!"
what it all boils down to is.. i dont like you, so piss off.
what it all boils down to is.. i like you, stick around.
what it all boils down to is.. i really dont care about you.. go away.
what it all bouls down to is.. i hate you.. die.. or something..
what it all boils down to is.. i love you..so you must turn away.
im telling you, yer gonna get in trouble! i TOLD you, stop trying to inter-
pret all this shit.
they say we argue over a game. what they dont get is, its not the game..
its the people ivolved.
we're all a little crazy. some of us are more crazy. just like we're all
equal. some are MORE equal.
i amaza myself in my creative stupidity.
is that an oxymoron? who cares.
this file is getting long. maybe i should cut it. nah.
In the beginning.. there was no one.
but me and myself.
then came the people.
but it was still me and myself.
im my own best friend. or so i gather.
unless, of course, you arent.
people make so much fuss over shit like sports. and games. what it all boils
down to is.. they got nuffin better to do. which is ok. since thats me.
i reread that 'searching' poem. pretty good, if i do say so myself. which i
did.
forlorn and dejected
scrapped and rejected
i am your human robot
i wonder if attraction
starts in the mind
the heart
the soul
or a combo of the 3
maybe when all 3 are involved
its not attraction at all
but its love
hmm.
i had a dream
and it was way too fucked up
there she was, the apple of my eye
not doing anything at all
just embracing and talking
i think i liked that dream
too bad it depressed me when i awoke
people say virtual reality isnt here. well it is, man. ever hear of lucid
dreaming? its the same shit, but better.
pardon if i make a few typos. its 4:30 am. i was going to sleep, but my
mind drifted back to the girl in that dream. arg.
i wonder if she's thinking the same stuff i am. i wonder if she feels the
same way i do. i wonder if thats good or bad. hmm.
how can you miss the touch
of someone who isnt there?
who isnt really real?
or maybe she is real,
just too good for this reality
thats why i only see her in dreams
hmm
or maybe its just im too insecure
to find out
how real she really is.
im sick of the world real.
oops, typo. or was it? hmm.
maybe i should just forget her
leave the whole matter
ignore it entirely
pretend i never gave it a thought
i think ill keel over then
does death bother you?
doesnt me.
whats death anyway?
nothingness.
you wouldnt know its going on.
so whats so bad about that?
permanent sleep.
a friend of mine says that you are conscious althroughout life and possibly
even death. i dunno if thats so great.
im forced to repress
what i want to express
that pretty much sums me and all of society up. if it wasnt for society,
we would all just be doing whatever it is what we would want to be doing.
and thats bad? hmm. youve been watching too much Jesus Channel propoganda.
someone told me ice tea is the work of satan. does this mean other
refreshment industries have the blessing of other assorted gods?
does yahweh endorse coke? does bhudda enjoy a snapple ice tea? i wanna know,
damn it.
yes, im being silly. so? it helps.
everything is always stolen away
my rights
my ideas
my habits
my pleasures
my needs
my sanity
why o why, is everything stolen away?
i cant say why
i guess my desires are just too good
for others to pass up
so they take them from me
before i can enjoy them
leaving me on the side of the road
by myself
alone
i suppose this sort of file is the 'trendy'thing to do. the whole poetry
/babble stuff. i blame justin for that. no offense, of course. but its funny
how those who care not for the trends, set the trends.
this is me, inside out. dont ask me why your reading this, i dont have a
clue why im writing it.
did you ever want
someone so much
that it hurt inside?
and when you
reached for her
they turned out to
be not really there?
thats my biggest fear. to chase after something which is an illusion. i saw
her in a dream once, maybe thats all she is then.. an illusion. a dream.
a creation from my subconscious. hmm.
this goes out to that special group of people in my heart:
o/~ why do you look at me if you hate me...
why should i look at you when you make me hate you too.. o/~
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