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| There Ain't No Justice |
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| #69 |
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- Vanity, thy Name is Woman -
by Tal Meta
Ah, vanity. It is an attribute primarily associated with women, and this
particular file will be a tribute to one woman's vanity. But before I begin,
a bit of background is in order....
Once upon a time, there was a female sysop who had what she herself called a
"nasty rep". Sadly enough, this file isn't about how she got that "rep". No
sir, its about some statements she made once upon a time in chat with a
couple of people I know (people who save things, 'cuz you just never know
what will come in handy, ya know?) and here are a few of the things she had
to say about good 'ol TANJ....
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Ahhhh....then you may have read several of those Tanj files....I have only
seen one but am looking for the rest as I was informed of some very serious,
very sick, lies that were included in them....derf is someones name spelled
in reverse.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
oh, cuz I was gonna ask you, if you still have those 14-15 files, if you
would be a sweetie and upload them to me....I really want to see what exactly
has been said about me personally
----------------------------------------------------------------------
sorry, I didn't mean it that way, but I need to know as much as I can right
now. ...I need to know what these files and these people have said and are
saying about me, if you can remember any of it at all
----------------------------------------------------------------------
damn....not your fault....see, I really NEED these files yesterday! I'd
explain why if ya like, but its not that important
--Well, why?
because I can hard-copy them and file charges of Slander against a public
figure
--Slander is very difficult, if not impossible to prove though. I have
--heard of many cases, and I have taken pre-law courses. One of the --hardest
crimes to prove.
True, but each of these files are traceable to one local -Tals bbs- as a
point of origin, I talked with a friend of mine last night and he said it
could be done quite easily
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Now, I'll admit, those statements were made quite awhile ago... and, of
course, she's never tried taking me to court for slander or anything else.
Whether this is because to prove slander you have to demostrate that the
statements made against you were FALSE, or simply due to apathy on her part,
i dunno. Maybe its because sysops hardly qualify as "public figures". But
someone reminded me that at the time, I had said I was going to make a file
called "Vanity, Thy name is Woman". So, times being a bit slow, I decided,
why not? :)
The deepest, darkest secret to the entire TANJ Conspiracy is that the lady in
question is in fact in ALMOST EVERY FILE WE'VE EVER WRITTEN! It's an
unwritten rule that anyone who wishes to submit a file must somewhere mention
her. I'll even give her a file by file listing of exactly where and in what
way she is being "slandered" in each and every file. I'm nothing if not
helpfull, you see. :)
<*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*>
---TANJ.000 tanj writers guide
The secret to this file is that it's CRC value, when fed into a gematria
program, will reveal the "true name" of our female sysop. Honest! :)
---TANJ.001 how to host a bust
While not directly mentioned anywhere in this file, she is nevertheless there
simply because her husband claims to have engineered my bust, no doubt to
"silence" my viscious lies!
---TANJ.002 words to live by
The quotes beginning on lines 27, 89, 98, 102, 116, & 251 all could be
construed as having something to do with our heroine. In fact, the one on 251
was originally created in a post I made to her, when she was commenting on
how wretched her life was. Go figure.
---TANJ.003 the last mile
She appears again in this file, as its about my brush with the law. As a
curious aside, the very morning I left for the vacation mentioned in the
file, my fiancee & I spotted them at a gas station at 4ish in the morning. We
kept our heads low and got out quick! :)
---TANJ.004 this ain't no sanfile / i hate banks
We had fun with this one. Careful analysis of the file will reveal that each
of the letters in her handle have been used EXACTLY 69 times.
---TANJ.006 on the origins of derf
Hey, she even gets her name mentioned outright in this one. What more do you
want? :)
---TANJ.007 at the end of my rope
Another "brush with the law" file. If only her husband hadn't tried to take
me out this way....
---TANJ.009 blood lust 01: the awakening
This file is mostly about blood, gore, and death. Bosch always liked gore &
death, which is why our heroine is in EVERY scene. Even when Mordecai is
alone, she's there. But she's never one of the victims. She's one of the
knives. I'll leave it up to you to decide which one.
---TANJ.011 blood lust 02: the consumation
Bosch tells me that in this file, she's the OTHER knife.
---TANJ.013 poems & memories
I have quite a collection of poems the women in my life have written. In this
file, there is a poem that shares a name in common with AB. Go read it, it's
quite good. Come to think of it, I have a few of AB's poems about... I wonder
if she'd mind? :)
---TANJ.014 going crazy in the suburbs 01
Read line 571. its right there. Go, do it now!
---TANJ.015 terrible lies
Since this file gives voice to derf, it also relates directly back on AB. In
the eyes of the law, they are one. One what, is the question though.
---TANJ.016 the abduction of a social geek
Since all of the "evil people" who have supposedly spread lies about AB are
mentioned in this file, she is here in spirit.
---TANJ.018 the 69 laws of bbsing
Its all in the title. We're evil.
---TANJ.019 man of steel / woman of kleenex
Since this file centers around sex... well, you get the picture.
---TANJ.024 the night that changed my life
Our heroine was in the Chinese restraunt (owned by Russians) at the
mini-mall. Again, she's not directly mentioned, but you just KNOW she's in
there, ya know?
---TANJ.027 going crazy in the suburbs 03
Read line 268, and wonder....
---TANJ.034 stan the flying roach
AB is in fact Mrs. Johnson, although none of the other members of the Johnson
Clan are related to her in any way. its just one of those mysteries, you
know?
---TANJ.035 star white and the seven derfs
Queen Pacifica. Need we say more?
---TANJ.037 adjourned again, naturally...
Its a legal TANJ, and we've already established the link...
---TANJ.044 final mission
In this file, AB appears as the grandmother in the final scene.
---TANJ.048 aristarchus of shiran: 01
All I'm going to say is.... AB is NOT Elissa. At all.
---TANJ.058 how do you plead?
It was Derf's faault... he says so. She was there, in the courtroom, but
never mentioned. its the link.
---TANJ.061 throckmorton of amber 01
AB is personified by the third emerald to the left in the Dragon's lair, you
know, the one that buried the nasties.
---TANJ.062 not necessarily the evening news
Mr. & Mrs. John Q Public indeed!
---TANJ.065 rage of angels
If the title doesn't give it all away, I don't know what possibly could.
---TANJ.066 blood lust 03: the marriage
Bosch tells me that in this file, AB is the third of the five musicians. And
is not either of the knives in this story. Amazing, the subtlety of it all,
yes?
---TANJ.067 offramp to hell
Remember the wall? Where the demons were working the humans? Look about
10,354 people over to the left, and there she is, plain as day, a load of
bricks on her sholder. She's also in the bar where Lennon was singling,
relaxing after a hard day's night, but don;t ask me where, ok?
---TANJ.069 vanity, thy name is woman
Now, of course, this file is entirely about AB. Every last word. Every word
the total, absolute truth. Hope you enjoyed it as much as we have. And AB, I
really hope this helps your case. The thought of you wasting money on a
lawyer to pursue this nonsense amuses me to no end. Life is, afterall,
exactly like a box....
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