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ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #823
`888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8
888 888 888 888 888 "The Second Time I Got Action?
888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8 Pfft. The 8000th Time I Was A Fool"
888 888 888 888 888 " by XxX_Droo7
888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 9/1/99
o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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My friend Ted goes to FDU. That's in Madison. I live in Freehold,
so I don't see him much when he's at school. Now at this point in time, I
was doing an installation for work at Allied Signal. That's literally right
around the corner from FDU. Seeing that we were gonna be working there for
several days, I figured I'd take advantage of Ted's location and bunk in his
dorm so I didn't have to wake up real early and drive my ass an hour to
work. It was good in theory.
So the first day of work is nearing the end and I'm busting the chops
of the guys I work with because I had this sweet lodging deal set up. I
leave the Allied compound and head over to FDU. I breech all security and
make it to his dorm room. I get into his dorm room and drop all my gear
down and these two chicks that he knows come inside. The one girl I met
before, the other I hadn't. Now I can't for the life of me remember their
names but I think the girl I met before was Christine and the new girl was
Kara. Christine wasn't much to look at, but Kara was lookin' cute. They
said they were on their way out to go someplace and Kara made some sort of
remark about how it was a good thing they didn't leave before they met me.
To me it sounded like she dug me a little. But I dissmissed that. So we
all shot some shit for like 10 minutes, and I was invited to hang out
upstairs with those two chicks while Ted was in class. "Groooovey." I
thought.
They left and me and Ted made our way over to the computer labs to
mess around a little bit before he went to his class. Me and Ted were bein'
totally goofy and crackin' all kinds of jokes and playin' tricks. Which
would lead to a bad situation later on that night. Anyway, Ted goes to
class and I head back to his building to go chill with those girls. The way
over was kind of fun cuz I got lost at first. :P
So I get to the building and I ring their room up on the intercom.
Kara picks up. I tell her who I am and that she needs to come down and let
me in. She doesn't believe me. She thinks I'm in Ted's room and I called
her up on the phone and was playing a trick on her. So I'm outside a few
minutes trying to convince her I'm actually outside and some dude goes into
the building and I follow him in. So I run up to their room and knock on
the door. She answers and apologises for not believing me. Turns out she
was asleep and I woke her up. Oh well. :P
I enter the room. It's just her in the suite. I sit down on one
couch and she sits down on the other clicks on the tv and starts watching
some corny shows on tv. I was just gonna sit there and be quiet and maybe
take a nap since it was around 9:30 pm and I was up at like 5:30am. But she
felt obligated to talk to me. No big deal. She was cute, I can handle
that. =) So I tried to be funny and said a million corny things. Now I am
not one to deny that I'm not funny and 99% of what I say is just dumb, but
she was laughing at the shit I was saying. She even laughed at things that
I didn't intend to be funny. I figured she was into me. Kind of threw me a
little bit. But hey, who was I to argue? :)
I forgot to mention that me and Ted went to the food store real quick
in my truck before he went to class. When we came back, I parked next to
Kara's new Volkswagen. We were gonna play a joke and act like I hit her
car, but not know it was hers. We were going to have this conversation in
her presence that went something like Ted saying "I can't believe you hit
that Volkswagen in the parking lot." And we were gonna go from there. It
never happened though.
So anyway, time passes and some of her suite mates show up. All
chicks. So I'm thinkin' to myself, "Awww yeah!" But after they showed up
they all ignored me and I felt like a fucking asshole sitting there. Ted
showed up after class and asked if I wanted to watch wrestling. I'm not
down for wrestling so I opted for chillin' with the chicks. So after being
ignored for awhile, I left and went down to Ted's and tried to cop some Z's.
But this was never to happen.
A couple events that occurred that night led to about 10-15 steroid
pumped jocks knocking on Ted's window at 1:30am looking for Ted so they
could find me. Long story short, they wanted to beat my ass, but I talked
my way out of it. It was all bullshit and I was being pegged for something
I didn't need. Needless to say, I got no sleep and was shitting my pants
nervous.
The next morning I got up around 6:30am so I could be at work by 7.
At this point I still think Kara is into me. So I figure if I don't do
something then, nothing would ever happen. When I get down to my truck, I
pull out a piece of paper from my pocket and write some corny note. I was
going to write something like "Sorry about the scratch. Call me." But
after the nights events, I felt it best not to joke like that. I forget
what I wrote, but I put my number down on it and hoped she called me. She
didn't.
I think it was two weeks later when I was back up there again
visiting Ted. I think it was for his birthday or something. Ted told me
what went down when she found the note. She got all freaked out and ripped
it up. I guess it was kind of creepy. But you'd think she could have asked
Ted and figured out how I know what car was hers and shit. No big deal she
didn't dig me, but the fact that she was creeped out and almost repulsed by
me is what bothers me. Ted told me that she was laughing at all my jokes
just to be nice. Man. I totally didn't think of that scenario. She didn't
think I was funny at all. Ted explained to her that she shouldn't have done
that. And that she should have just said "You aren't very funny." To me
and all would have been cool. Which is true. I totally welcome that kind
of criticism. If I'm being an ass, tell me. Cuz I don't want to be an ass.
At that point I really didn't understand why she didn't dig me. I thought
we were on par with each other.
Later that night, there was some kind of 80's night thing going on.
So me and Ted showed up there. His roomate was part of the group that was
running it. We were hanging outside the room it was in and this beautiful
girl comes in the entrance to the building and Ted is saying hi to her. I'm
like damn. Ted knows this girl. Sweet deal. She shakes hands with Ted and
turns to me to shake my hand. Then it hits me, it was Kara. No wonder she
didn't dig me. She was way out of my league. When I first met her, she had
a cold and was in like sweatpants and a sweatshirt. I was very enlightened
that night. It was a moment of zen.
And the routine of my life goes on unchanged....
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[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #823 - WRITTEN BY: XXX_DROO7 - 9/1/99 ]