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ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #539
`888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8
888 888 888 888 888 "How Zines are Made"
888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8
888 888 888 888 888 " by Nybar
888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 3/27/99
o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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This is an investigative report by Nybar, AKA The Rugged Child.
IRC. 1:00 am, all is silent.
<Nybar> Yes, we were all just sitting here in IRC, typing away. Then, out
of nowhere, like a killer whale snapping it's anus, *IT* happened.
<tashy> you could write an entire file in alternating caps and excessive
typos
<Nybar> Been there, done that
<tashy> Suck Blue Frog + f12, motha
<Mogel> Hey Nybar
*** Wonder-Years voiceover: At this point, I felt torn. Was Mogel here
to explore the gosh-darn goodness of friendship... or was he here
for ... that. You know...
<Mogel> Hey, Nybar, write for h0e!
*** This is happening around the globe, and many suspect Mogel of being a
secret army of cloned Mogels, all grabbing our T-FILES, with
flouridized shamPOO, yeah that's it... NAZIS!
*** Earnest News Anchor guy: This is a serious problem that is
afflicting many around the world. As Tasha has said, "Mogel is like,
jewish or something, right? Doesn't that mean he's been castrated or
something?" News Caster: "Yes indeedy, this is a disturbing
problem, almost as disturbing as the fact that White giants always
seem to look taller then Black giants, just showing that we still
harbor the stereotype of the 'large, black, cocanized negro'. This
is such hamfisted, fallacious shitting in our fucking faces, that I
will rape your asses.
Aunt Nybar's Reply: "Well, Disturbed, I'd have to say, it's lump
it or leave it on this one, in more ways then one!!! You see, on one side,
you have Raymond claiming it's just like taking a big dump. But, on the
other side, you have your father saying 'I like cock!'. What to do? I
say, eat hostess cakes! They'reeeeeeeeeeeee GRReat, and really keep the
pounds off!!"
*** The Trial
Nybar: Yes, we were all just sitting here in IRC, typing away. Then, out
of nowhere, like a killer whale snapping it's anus, *IT* happened.
Nybar: Mr. Judge, the defendant Mogel appeared, out of seeming idleness,
to solicit h0e-authorship, a federal crime calling for the penalty
of 20 to 80 triple dildo rapings up the ass, which (if you learned
math in school, which I'm sure Judge did <sucks judge's cock>),
adds up to 93, I believe. But I am Einstein! Here is the proof
Judge!
Mogel: Hey, Nybar, write for h0e!
Nybar: As you can see, the evidence is overhwelming.
The Judge: Mogel, do you plead guilty to solicitation of hoe-authorship
solicitation?
Mogel: Yes, yes I do. In passing, I would like to state that I am jewish.
Word is born.
The Judge: And Nybar, do you plead guilty to writing a t-file while high?
Nybar: Yep.
The Judge: And sodomizing and drowning all those retarded, disabled orpans?
Nybar: Yes, yes I do.
The Judge: And eating out all those --
Nybar: Uh, can we postpone this to a later date?
The Judge: Sure son. By the way -- PIMPIN' AIN'T EASY!
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[ (c) 1999, a Nybariuz Joint Studioz Proh-duction HOE #539 - 3/27/99 ]