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'##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!!
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##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #373 !!
#########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS! !!
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##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "Geeks With Big Dicks" !!
##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> Darwin !!
..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 12/22/98 !!
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Hey, it's your friendly neighborhood computer underground type
character with an article for your consideration. I'm Darwin (NOT MY
REAL NAME), a computer geek who has been wasting his time on these
stupid machines for most of my life. I started out on the TRS-80 model
II, and I'm typing this article on my 486/120. What happened between is
the sort of stuff that every other article in this 'zine is about.
Actually, it's what this article is about, too, but not really in the
way that you're probably expecting. What I've experienced in the last
13 years on the computer and especially the last 5 years with my modem
is loosely referred to as "the computer underground". From the text
scene to the hack scene, to the warez scene, to the art scene, I've
dabbled in just about every computer scene there is. I've noticed
something that I think is pretty important, or interesting, anyway.
Essentially, it's that any computer underground scene comes down to a
bunch of weird geeks who want to prove how big their dick is.
Now, I know what you're thinking.
"Dick? He didn't mention the pr0n scene!"
I'm not talking about .GIF dicks, or any real kind of sexual
organ. What I'm talking about is the male ego, the 'I'm better than
you' attitude, the 'my dick is bigger than yours' attitude. Why am I
not mentioning females? Well, honestly, they're statistically
insignificant in the computer underground. Parents don't push
computers on their female children as much as boys, not to mention
cultural taboos against technical or smart females. Back to the point
at hand.
Take my local text scene. In RICUS magazine, "Robin Hood" (NOT
HIS REAL HANDLE) wrote info about how to hack Fidonets, the bust of
local freaks, et cetera. Pretty tame stuff, but far-out for the kind
of kid who is used to Wildcat bbses, and Shareware crap like that.
After RICUS hit the local scene, we had scores of copycats, although
none of them had any really useful information in them like RICUS did.
People called The Ministry of Knowledge (TMoK) to peruse the huge
masses of text files, and people jumped on the bandwagon. Local guys
competed to get text from Ripco, Demon Roach Underground, The Works,
The Floating Pancreas, all the major text boards. People hoarded cDc
and uXu text files and started trying to write "CRAZZY SCHTUPH". The
RICUS folks spawned S0NS 0F LIBERTY (S0L) which was pretty decent, for
a while. The people who wrote for this group were literate and
knowledgeable. Of course, they got the 'glory' in the local scene,
and others wanted a chunk of the action. A bunch of lame-ass groups
sprung up, saying idiotic things for 4 issues and then dying. Mostly,
they were bad-mouthing people who nobody had ever heard about and
jabbering about hacking telegard. Total crap. Anyway, my point here
is pretty obvious. The Text scene was established as a permanent
entity. Those who had the most text files and wrote the most for the
text magazines were the most respected. Instead of being some
pimply-faced 95-pound weakling, they were big shots, they got the
glory, they had the biggest dick.
People had been pirating software for years, but the
proliferation of the modem really helped people along. Instead of copy
parties or borrowing your friends disks, you just dial up your local
wares board. You log in, you see some amazing ANSI art and then you
download your cracked copy of Police Quest. Could there be anything
better? Well, some of these boards want you to upload, so what can you
do? Either you can call long distance to try to find some other games
to put up there, or you can do ANSIs for the system. The people from the
text scene who wanted games ended up either as warez traders or art
scene freaks. Eventually, some time in 92 or 93, the art people finally
told the wares guys to fuck off and started charging for ANSIs. This,
in my opinion, is completely retarded. There should be competition to
do an ANSI for a big wares group. I mean, Christ, people will see your
logo everytime they download a game! Anyway, the wares scene showed up,
accompanied by the art scene. People make their names bigger, trying to
be the best artist, run the biggest board, be in the best groups,
whatever. Again, both of these scene exist for the sole purpose of
boosting the ego of a antisocial computer addict.
So, for the people who like to take apart shit and "BOMB VEGAS
FIRSTTT" (i.e. -- people who saw 'Wargames') started hacking computers.
Doing crazy stuff like scanning #s for sys75s, UNIX dialup boxes, and
finally jumping on the net and haqing up the Pentagon and the Kremlin.
Anyway, these people wrote their own text files about hacking, hung out
on bridges, and just basically spent a lot of time on their computers.
We have PHRACK, 2600, CuD, all dedicated to explaining exactly how to
get stuff without paying it. The better you could hack, the cooler you
were, the more people respected your name. Urville from the Legion of
Doom got tons of props, despite the fact that he's not the world's most
interesting guy (I've met him). Anyway we see here (as in the wares
scene) the second reason for the computer underground. Not only are
these people trying to prove their masculinity, they are trying to get
something that they are not allowed to have.
Does this sound familiar to anyone? It should.
Anyone who has been to High School in America understands all of
these trends without even knowing it. We have the jocks (low-tech), the
nerds (hi-tech), the punks (lowest-tech), etc, etc... but they're all
trying to be the best at what they are. They're all trying to get
booty, get into the best colleges, get the nicest cars, get drunk, get
in fights, whatever. They're rebelling against their parents and doing
it in whatever way they happen to prefer. The big guys play football,
the brainy anti-social types hack, trade wares, do ANSIs, write text
files, or whatever.
People in all of the computer underground's scenes like to diss
the people in the other scenes. Wares guys don't like text files,
hackers don't like anyone, text guys don't like wares guys, and so on
so forth. I have to say that I think that this is completely
counterproductive, and the fragmented nature of the underground aids in
its assimilation into mainstream culture. We, as computer geeks (that
is, people who spend tons of times fooling around with a machine), are
by our nature anti-social (not spending tons of time fooling around with
people). If we are to hold strong against those we universally despise:
Consumers, Jocks, Yuppies, in other words "THE COMPLACENT MULTITUDE",
then we have to put this crap aside. Wares guys, make friends with your
software! Hack guys, make friends with your accounts! Text guys, make
friends with crazy shit! Art guys, draw an ansi for free for some hacker
or wares guy or whatever! If you're going to waste your time on these
damn machines...
Do it for the sake of the greater purpose --
"The Right To Be Antisocial as Hell and Still Make Friends and
Have Fun." (If I could put it in 10 foot letters on my roof, god knows
I would.)
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!! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! #373 - WRITTEN BY: DARWIN - 12/22/98 !!