💾 Archived View for gemini.spam.works › mirrors › textfiles › magazines › GWD › gwd50.txt captured on 2022-06-12 at 12:06:45.
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T h e G R E E N Y w o r l d D o m i n a t i o n T a s k F o r c e ,
I n c o r p o r a t e d
Presents:
TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT hh
T TTT T h
TTT h
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TTT h h h e e
TTT h h e e
TTT h h eeeeeeee
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TTTTT hhh hhh eeeeee dd
d
KKKKK KKKK d
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KKKK KKKK rr r r aaa aa ddd d
KKKK KK /------/ rr r r a aa d dd
KKKKKK /------/ r rr a a d d
KKKK KK r a a d d
KKKK KKKK r a a d d
KKKK KKKK r a aa d dd
KKKKK KKKK rrr aaa aa ddd dd
333333 /--/ YYYY YYYY +++ 333333
333 333 / / YYYY YYYY +++ 333 333
333 / / YYYY YYYY +++ 333
333 / / YYYYY + + + +++ + + + 333
33333 / / YYY + + + +++ + + + 33333
333 / / YYY +++ 333
333 / / YYY +++ 333
333 333 / / YYY +++ 333 333
333333 /--/ YYYYY 333333
5555555555555555555555555555555 00000000000000
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55555 000 000 tt hh
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5555555555555555555 00000000000000 tttt hhh hhh
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF lllll
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF lll
FFF FFF lll
FFF FF lll
FFF F lll
FFF lll
FFF iiiii lll
FFF iiiii lll eeeeeeeeeee bbbb
FFF F iiiii lll eee eee bbb
FFFFFFFFFFFFFF lll eee eee bbb
FFFFFFFFFFFFFF iiiii lll eee eee bbb
FFF F iii lll eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee bbb
FFF iii lll eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee bbbbbbb yy yy
FFF iii lll eee bbb bb yy yy
FFF iii lll eee eee bbb bb yy yy
FFF iii lll eee eee bbb bb yy yy
FFF iii lll eee eee bbb bb yy
FFF iii lll eeeeeeeeeee bbbbbbb yy
FFFFF iiiii lllll eeeeeeeee yy
yy
yy
TTTTTTTTTTT H H EEEEEEEEEEE
T H H E
T H H E
T HHHHHHHHHH EEEEE
T H H E
T H H E
T H H EEEEEEEEEEE
GGGGG DDDDDDDD
GGGGGGGGGGG DDDD DDDDDD
GGGGGG GGGGG DDDD DDDDDD
GGGGG GGGGG DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG GGGGGGGG DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG GGGGGGGGGG www w www DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG GGGGGGGGGGGGGG www wwwww www DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG GGGGG www www www www DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG GGGGG www www www www DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG GGGGG www www www www DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG GGGGG www www www www DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG GGGGG www www www www DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG GGGGG www www www www DDDD DDDDD
GGGGGG GGGGG ... www www www www ... DDDD DDDDD ...
GGGGGGGGGGGGG ... wwwww wwwww ... DDDD DDDDDD ...
GGGGGGG ... www www ... DDDDDDDD ...
-< T A S K F O R C E >-
%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@%#@
-=( T h e G R E E N Y w o r l d D o m i n a t i o n T a s k F o r c e )=-
@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%@#%
_______________________________________________________________________
/ / / / / - - - - - * * * * * GwD 50 * * * * * - - - - - \ \ \ \ \
GREENYworldDomination-GwD-GREENYworldDomination-GwD-GREENYworldDomination
GREENYworldDomination-GwD-GREENYworldDomination-GwD-GREENYworldDomination
GREENYworldDomin/---------------------------------------\YworldDomination
GREENYworldDomin| 1. Cat or Dog? |YworldDomination
GREENYworldDomin| 2. Cool Stuff |YworldDomination
GREENYworldDomin| 3. REVELATION: GREEN (The Ascension) |YworldDomination
GREENYworldDomin| 4. *HE* was in GwD?!?!?! |YworldDomination
GREENYworldDomin| 5. Official Press Release from GwD HQ |YworldDomination
GREENYworldDomin\---------------------------------------/YworldDomination
GREENYworldDomination-GwD-GREENYworldDomination-GwD-GREENYworldDomination
GREENYworldDomination-GwD-GREENYworldDomination-GwD-GREENYworldDomination
\ \ \ \ \ - - - - - * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * - - - - - / / / / /
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
This is the k-rad 3/Y+3 file by the GwD Task Force. GwD rocks like hell.
This is the longest GwD file to date. Kiss my ass if you don't like it.
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/ \ | __ |
/ | | | | |
/ | | | |
/ -----/ \ / | | | |
/ / \ /\ / | |__| |
\_________/ \/ \/ |________/
The first GwD logo, by Seth - 1993
11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111
-----------------------------/
Cat or Dog? /
posted on Club Baby Seal /
-----------------------/
Date: 8:28 pm Mon Aug 21, 1995 Number : 1 of 22
From: Loki Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : All Refer #: None
Subj: hey Replies: 2
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
which tastes better:
cat
or
dog
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [1/22] :
Date: 11:09 am Wed Aug 23, 1995 Number : 2 of 22
From: Poppy Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Loki Refer #: 1
Subj: Re: hey Replies: 1
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
[From] Loki
[To] All
L> which tastes better:
L> cat
L> or
L> dog
It all depends on the seasonings you use.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [2/22] :
Date: 5:43 pm Wed Aug 23, 1995 Number : 3 of 22
From: Zippy Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Poppy Refer #: 2
Subj: Re: hey Replies: 2
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
L> which tastes better:
L> cat
L> or
L> dog
P>
P> It all depends on the seasonings you use.
And don't forget the age of the animal. Younger=tender.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [3/22] :
Date: 5:59 pm Wed Aug 23, 1995 Number : 4 of 22
From: Loki Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Zippy Refer #: 3
Subj: Re: hey Replies: 4
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
L> which tastes better:
L> cat
L> or
L> dog
P>
P> It all depends on the seasonings you use.
Z>
Z> And don't forget the age of the animal. Younger=tender.
okay..do you all think that breed plays a part then? I mean, of course there
is going to be a difference between a chihuahua and say, a german shepherd, but
I wonder taste wise. or will it all taste like chicken.
loki
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [4/22] :
Date: 6:50 pm Wed Aug 23, 1995 Number : 5 of 22
From: Poppy Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Zippy Refer #: 3
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
[From] Zippy
[To] Poppy
L> which tastes better:
L> cat
L> or
L> dog
P>
P> It all depends on the seasonings you use.
Z>
Z> And don't forget the age of the animal. Younger=tender.
Yes and no... You can baste an old stringy Chihuahua in Shiner Bock for a
while to make it juicy, and it'll taste about the same as a new chihuahua
puppy.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [5/22] :
Date: 6:53 pm Wed Aug 23, 1995 Number : 6 of 22
From: Poppy Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Loki Refer #: 4
Subj: Re: hey Replies: 2
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
[From] Loki
[To] Zippy
L> okay..do you all think that breed plays a part then? I mean, of course ther
L> is going to be a difference between a chihuahua and say, a german shepherd, b
L> I wonder taste wise. or will it all taste like chicken.
Well, the breed _does_ play a part in the taste, but a major part is going to
be what you feed it. If you just grab Joe Blow's mutt who's been fed Gravy
train all it's life, you're going to get a dog that tastes like dog food.
However, if you go and feed that dog chickens, fresh game, and other wholesome
carnivorous type meals, you're going to get a meaty, well blended meal.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [6/22] :
Date: 9:55 pm Wed Aug 23, 1995 Number : 7 of 22
From: Loki Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Poppy Refer #: 6
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
P> However, if you go and feed that dog chickens, fresh game, and other wholsom
P> carnivorous type meals, you're going to get a meaty, well blended meal.
that's probably why my korean friends served up the best-tasting dishes on the
block.
loki
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [7/22] :
Date: 6:48 am Thu Aug 24, 1995 Number : 8 of 22
From: Zippy Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Loki Refer #: 4
Subj: Re: hey Replies: 2
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
L> okay..do you all think that breed plays a part then? I mean, of course ther
L> is going to be a difference between a chihuahua and say, a german shepherd, b
L> I wonder taste wise. or will it all taste like chicken.
Well, I would think that season would play as much a part as anything. For
instance: you would probably filet portions of the larger breeds and bar-b-que
them during the warm months. The smaller, or 'toy' breeds would make better
'fryers', etc.
But during the cold months, I tend to get away from eating dogs altogether,
and tend to crave baby humans more.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [8/22] :
Date: 9:05 am Thu Aug 24, 1995 Number : 9 of 22
From: Phlegm Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Zippy Refer #: 8
Subj: Re: hey Replies: 1
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
Z> Well, I would think that season would play as much a part as anything. For
Z> instance: you would probably filet portions of the larger breeds and bar-b-q
Z> them during the warm months. The smaller, or 'toy' breeds would make better
Z> 'fryers', etc.
And don't forget the seasonal dishes... Baked chuh-hoo-ah-hoo-ah, with
stove-top-stuffing (not mashed potatoes.)
Basted a golden brown..
Quite juicy.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [9/22] : -
Date: 6:48 am Thu Aug 24, 1995 Number : 8 of 22
From: Zippy Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Loki Refer #: 4
Subj: Re: hey Replies: 2
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
L> okay..do you all think that breed plays a part then? I mean, of course ther
L> is going to be a difference between a chihuahua and say, a german shepherd, b
L> I wonder taste wise. or will it all taste like chicken.
Well, I would think that season would play as much a part as anything. For
instance: you would probably filet portions of the larger breeds and bar-b-que
them during the warm months. The smaller, or 'toy' breeds would make better
'fryers', etc.
But during the cold months, I tend to get away from eating dogs altogether,
and tend to crave baby humans more.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [8/22] :
Date: 9:05 am Thu Aug 24, 1995 Number : 9 of 23
From: Phlegm Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Zippy Refer #: 8
Subj: Re: hey Replies: 1
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
Z> Well, I would think that season would play as much a part as anything. For
Z> instance: you would probably filet portions of the larger breeds and bar-b-q
Z> them during the warm months. The smaller, or 'toy' breeds would make better
Z> 'fryers', etc.
And don't forget the seasonal dishes... Baked chuh-hoo-ah-hoo-ah, with
stove-top-stuffing (not mashed potatoes.)
Basted a golden brown..
Quite juicy.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [9/23] :
Date: 11:44 am Thu Aug 24, 1995 Number : 10 of 23
From: Loki Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Zippy Refer #: 8
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
Z> Well, I would think that season would play as much a part as anything. For
Z> instance: you would probably filet portions of the larger breeds and bar-b-q
Z> them during the warm months. The smaller, or 'toy' breeds would make better
good idea...and the larger breeds would make good jerky as well, which, In my
opinion, jerky is the best thing to take with you when it's dog season, and
your stuck in a dog blind in some alley, and it's like 30 degrees, little bit
of a wind, and your just cold as fuck, and you need something to chew on.
loki
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [10/23] :
Date: 12:40 pm Thu Aug 24, 1995 Number : 11 of 23
From: Captain Harlock Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Loki Refer #: 4
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
[From] Loki
[To] Zippy
L> okay..do you all think that breed plays a part then? I mean, of course ther
L> is going to be a difference between a chihuahua and say, a german shepherd, b
L> I wonder taste wise. or will it all taste like chicken.
I can tell you that white wine goes better with smaller dogs, and red with
bigger. Chihooahooas are really nice braised in a nice white wine and swiss
cheese sauce, whereas the St. Barnard is best roasted whole over a spit and
covered with brandy and flamed.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [11/23] :
Date: 3:43 pm Thu Aug 24, 1995 Number : 12 of 23
From: Tarot Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Loki Refer #: 1
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
L> which tastes better:
L>
L> cat
L>
L> or
L>
L> dog
Uh could you repeat the question please, i don't understand it!
FUckit
Tarot
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [12/23] :
Date: 3:44 pm Thu Aug 24, 1995 Number : 13 of 23
From: Tarot Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Loki Refer #: 4
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
L> okay..do you all think that breed plays a part then? I mean, of course ther
L> is going to be a difference between a chihuahua and say, a german shepherd, b
L> I wonder taste wise. or will it all taste like chicken.
L>
L> loki
Chicken, its gonna taste like a fuckin dog, no more like a wet dog, and man
that tastes bad
Tarot
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [13/23] :
Date: 3:46 pm Thu Aug 24, 1995 Number : 14 of 23
From: Tarot Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Phlegm Refer #: 9
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
P> stove-top-stuffing (not mashed potatoes.)
Hey ma can mr. Buttafuco come eat our house tonight since were havin' stove
pup!
Tarot
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [14/23] :
Date: 6:51 pm Thu Aug 24, 1995 Number : 15 of 23
From: Hell'S Bell'S Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Poppy Refer #: 6
Subj: Re: hey Replies: 2
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
This is disgusting. Shutup. Talk about under water basket weaving or something
normal like that.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [15/23] :
Date: 7:27 pm Thu Aug 24, 1995 Number : 16 of 23
From: Spellbound Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Zippy Refer #: None
Subj: Replies: 1
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
Lion meat is pretty good.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [16/23] :
Date: 8:34 pm Thu Aug 24, 1995 Number : 17 of 23
From: Phlegm Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Hell'S Bell'S Refer #: 15
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
HB> This is disgusting. Shutup. Talk about under water basket weaving or someth
HB> normal like that.
Normal is stupid.
Normal is boring.
Normal is PINK.
got chew on THAT dog fat.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [17/23] :
Date: 5:07 am Fri Aug 25, 1995 Number : 18 of 23
From: Zippy Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Spellbound Refer #: 16
Subj: Re: Replies: 2
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
[From] Spellbound
[To] Zippy
S>
S> Lion meat is pretty good.
I think anything endangered is particularly yummy.
Mountain Gorilla and Panda are about my favorites.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [18/23] :
Date: 5:29 pm Fri Aug 25, 1995 Number : 19 of 24
From: Tarot Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Hell'S Bell'S Refer #: 15
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
HB> This is disgusting. Shutup. Talk about under water basket weaving or someth
HB> normal like that.
Hey fella this ain't no fuckin' GYM class, well maybe it couldbe, thatain'tall
bad, i mean i still have wet dreams about coaches
Fuckit
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [19/24] :
Date: 5:30 pm Fri Aug 25, 1995 Number : 20 of 24
From: Tarot Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Zippy Refer #: 18
Subj: Re: Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
Z> I think anything endangered is particularly yummy.
Z>
Z> Mountain Gorilla and Panda are about my favorites.
YOu forgot, white tiger, uhmm finger suckin' good
God saves
Tarot
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [20/24] :
Date: 6:06 pm Fri Aug 25, 1995 Number : 21 of 24
From: Spellbound Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Zippy Refer #: 18
Subj: Re: Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
don't forget about that rare bird... the California Condor...
i try to eat those for Christmas dinner you know..
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [21/24] :
Date: 6:08 pm Fri Aug 25, 1995 Number : 22 of 24
From: Spellbound Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Everyone!! Refer #: None
Subj: CHOCOLATE!! Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
Everyone must MUST call ma and purchase chocolate at one little ole American
buck....
my son is selling chocolate so he can win a drum set...... okay people leave
me email.
for the kids sake.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [22/24] :
Date: 9:31 pm Fri Aug 25, 1995 Number : 24 of 24
From: Lobo Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Zippy Refer #: 18
Subj: Re: Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
Z> I think anything endangered is particularly yummy.
Z>
Z> Mountain Gorilla and Panda are about my favorites.
i've always been partial to bald eagle and komodo dragon, but hey, it's a
matter of opinion, eh?
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [24/24] :
Date: 9:32 am Sat Aug 26, 1995 Number : 24 of 25
From: Hell'S Bell'S Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Phlegm Refer #: 17
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
Necromanciation is normal and it most definitely is not boring.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [24/25] :
Date: 5:08 pm Sat Aug 26, 1995 Number : 25 of 25
From: Zapp Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Loki Refer #: 1
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
L> cat
cat
--ZAPP
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [25/25]
Date: 8:03 pm Mon Aug 28, 1995 Number : 26 of 29
From: Tarot Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Spellbound Refer #: 21
Subj: Re: Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
S> don't forget about that rare bird... the California Condor...
To bad buffalo aren't nearly extinct anymore, cause those things fuckin' smell
ew who farted!
Tarot
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [26/29] :
Date: 8:04 pm Mon Aug 28, 1995 Number : 27 of 29
From: Tarot Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Lobo Refer #: 23
Subj: Re: Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
L> i've always been partial to bald eagle and komodo dragon, but hey, it's a
L> matter of opinion, eh?
Both are too gamy tastin' fer me
FInger Suckin' Good
Tarot
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [27/29] :
Date: 10:29 am Tue Aug 29, 1995 Number : 28 of 29
From: Longshot Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Cafe Americain, May It Rest In P Refer #: None
Subj: my favorite dishes Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
I rather enjoy a nice grilled teenager, served with baby potatoes and those
lil bitty ears of corn. The rampant hormones just add something to the
flavoring that makes 'em Mmm-Mmm Good.
Another favorite around the Longshot household is deep-fried cockroaches. Just
gather 'em up and pop in the Fry Daddy for a yummy snack during movies...no
batter needed. Remember to spit out the shells, though. They can get stuck in
your teeth and it takes needle-nose pliers to get 'em out.
For more delicious recipes, send $12.95 + $3 shipping & handling to:
I Can't Believe You Ate That!
Box 90210
Cucamonga, Il 77765
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [28/29] :
Date: 11:42 am Tue Aug 29, 1995 Number : 29 of 29
From: Phlegm Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Hell'S Bell'S Refer #: 24
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
HB> Necromanciation is normal and it most definitely is not boring.
I happen to prefer necrophilia, thank you very much.
Kinda chilly and stiff, but I LIKE 'em that way.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [29/29] :
Date: 7:29 am Fri Sep 1, 1995 Number : 31 of 32
From: Zippy Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Phlegm Refer #: 29
Subj: Re: hey Replies: 1
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
P> I happen to prefer necrophilia, thank you very much.
P>
P> Kinda chilly and stiff, but I LIKE 'em that way.
And they can't say 'No' OR resist.
Perfect woman.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [31/32] :
Date: 3:08 pm Fri Sep 1, 1995 Number : 32 of 32
From: Longshot Base : [cbs] Not For Human Consumptio
To : Zippy Refer #: 31
Subj: Re: hey Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
ZI> And they can't say 'No' OR resist.
and don't forget the "no conversation afterward" bonus, or the fact that you
can just stick 'em in the fridge and save 'em for later.
[[cbs] Not For Human Consumption] [32/32] :
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
GGGGGGGGGGGGG DDDDDD
GGG GGGG DDD DDD
GGG DD DDD
GGG DD DDD
GGG DD DDD
GGG DD DDD
GGG GGGGGG w w DD DDD
GGG GGG w w w DD DDD
GGG GGG w w w w DD DDD
GGG GGG w w w w DD DDD
GGG GGG ww ww DDD DDD
GGGGGGGGGGGG DDDDDD
A GwD logo - 1995
22222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222
------------------------------------/
Cool Stuff /
compiled by Lobo /
(some stuff's by him, too.) /
----------------------------/
________________________________________________________________________________
Part A: The Texas Lottery
This is a silly writing assignment I had to do for my computer science class
last year at school. I hope you like it. If you don't sense the abounding
sarcasm, you live in the toilet.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Mr. Bush,
You, as the governor, should know many people's opinions regarding
many issues. For instance, you must know what all of us Fundamentalist
Christians think regarding the lottery, because we're better than everyone
else. The Texas Lottery is an issue that has many pros and cons, mostly cons.
The lottery has a few pros. One of these is that winners can donate
some of their winnings to the Church tax-free. Another is that since gamblers
sin by gambling, they obviously sin in other ways as well, and we don't want
sinners in the church. The Lottery weeds out the sinners. The Lottery also
benefits education. This is good because with a great man like you in office,
we will soon re-instate a good old fashioned Fundamentalist education for our
children, and if Mr. Gingrich on Capitol Hill gets his way, some of the
lottery money can be spent to hire a preacher to lead school prayer. However,
the lottery is not all that good of a thing.
The lottery is against God because of the gambling involved. We all
know that gambling is a sin (except when the gambling is Bingo at Church).
God has punishments for gamblers, such as eternal damnation in hell. Not only
are gamblers destined for eternal suffering, but they are spending their money
on something besides church. This should not be. All money not spent on
housing, food, and clothing should be spent on the church. [In the original
draft it said "All money not spent on housing, food, clothing, and
prostitutes...", but I decided I was going a little too far for a good grade
anyway. -Lobo] Gambling is evil,and any people caught buying tickets should be
rehabilitated, inquisition-style. The Texas Lottery Commission should be
replaced with a group of us Fundamentalists. Only then can we turn the lottery
toward the forces of good.
The Texas Lottery is definitely something you should consider. I'd
like to say that my Church and I will support whichever decision you make.
However, I cannot say this because I would be lying, and lying is a sin. What
I will say is that if you do not change the lottery to put us in charge of it
or cancel it altogether, we will be forced to vote you out in four years. I
cannot be held responsible for what a few of our more "unbalanced"
individuals might do to you and/or your family. Change the lottery, Mr. Bush.
The Texas Lottery has a few good points but many bad ones. This
should be changed, or bad things will happen to you. I urge you to do what I
say.
In the Name of the Lord,
Lobo "The God-Send"
________________________________________________________________________________
Part B: E-mail to me.
I have no idea who sent this (I can't remember, it's old), but I found it on
my drive and I still think it's funny.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
An Anarchy file is a file that tells you how to break into a house and rob it
and stuff. Thats not as useful to use as things like, "How to get free cokes
out of a coke machines or free candy out of a vending machine. YOu are
supposed to pour salt down the coin despencer and the machine will start
pouring out change and cokes. Tells ya how to make great "REVENGE" things that
were made in the "Viet Nam War" by the Viets. So about those GLs thats I told
ya about, well I lied but I do have some great nude GIFs of Cindy Crawford and
things like that. Sorry to disappoint ya.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I do remember that that was in reply to my reply to his auto-message which
said something to the effect of "E-mail me if you have anarchy files, or if you
want to know what one is. I also have great GL's and GIF's and stuff." I
simply asked him to tell me what an anarchy file was (don't you love his
definition? heheh).
________________________________________________________________________________
Part C: Lame Board Stuff
I AM NOT the person chatting. I got this from an anonymous source that
wanted to piss the sysop of the board off. All names (handles and boards) have
not been changed (except the references to the board this was on). This is the
newuser login on a board that runs GAP, I believe. In case you care. Which you
don't.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What is your favorite color?
A: Jimm's
Q: What is your shoe size?
A: cool
Q: What is the capital of Assyria?
A: new
Q: Do you engage in any sexual activities with farm animals?
A: board
Q: Is your father a lesbian?
A: fuck you
Q: Did you get that last question?
A: woo
Good, your not a worthless dependant of your parents after all.
Q: Do you ever feel that women laugh at your penis?
A: fuck
Q: If you happen to be a woman, do you laugh at the size of mens' penises?
A: always
Q: If my mom is reading this right now. . .would you let me off easy?
A: suck my dick, girlie man.
Q: Are you thoroughly prepared for the enormousness of what you have just begun
to emerse yourself in?
A: super!
Q: In the next few lines, tell me about your person:
A: i have a big hard dick
A: i stroke it often.
A: stroke me, please!
A: well well well. poopoo buttsie.
A: suck my dick.
Are you ready????????????? WELCOME!!!!!!
P.S.
If you stayed on-line through the previous questionnaire, then you must be
insane enough to join.
<chat begins>
--=Hi, This Is Jimm SysOp=--
Jimm SysOp: what the fuck fo you want???
anony guy: Jimm's BBS will nail your ass to the wall every time.
Jimm SysOp: is this mr. aerik aeriksson
anony guy: nope, why would he get on under a bs handle?
Jimm SysOp: i don't know, but i remember writing that on a post somewhere
anony guy: PCI. that's where it was and that's where i read it. hee-haw!
Jimm SysOp: have we spoken before on posts???
anony guy: hmmm, i don't think so. we call some of the same boards, and as near
as i can tell, you're quite an ass.
Jimm SysOp: fuck you too, do you want on this board or are you going to start
some shit??
anony guy: is a bbs really worth getting pissed over? well, i guess i'll log
off and maybe get on later with my real handle, but you'll never know
who this really is, mr. cool.
Jimm SysOp: you can get on the board, but just don't fuck with me, you can do
anything else though, and a BBS is worth getting pissed off about if
you put months into setting it up
anony guy: well, shit. 'just don't fuck with me' ---- scary scary, don't we
look mean?
<Jimm SysOp proceeds to hit the panic-button and knock anony guy off of the bbs>
________________________________________________________________________________
Part D: Yearbook Stuff
The following is the signature that Mr. Q put in my 1994 (Freshman)
yearbook. I think it's damn funny. I'm sorry if you don't. Well, not really.
Granted, it's about half private jokes, but some of it's not and some of it's
funny even if you don't entirely get it. Maybe. Btw- Mr. Q really is Satan
[and is a member of the Keyblurr Elvz (maybe) and a GwD member. We've got POWER
now! Especially since The Lizard King is really God, and he's in GwD too. Aww
yeah! Heheheh.]
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hey Lobo,
It is my great hope that one day, all the oppressed frogs will rise up
in glorious triumph and take over the world. May you live each day of your
life & find true happiness & a good woman.
SMOKING KILLS
(Do Acid)
Caw Caw! Bang! Fuck, I'm dead.
Your Prince of Darkness,
Your Lord of Evil,
Mephistopheles
A.K.A.
Mr. Q
P.S. I DON'T RESPECT YOU! You're not my father.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This next little bit is an "article" in the 1995 yearbook [my Sophomore
year] at my school. It features a brief quote from Kilroy [another GwD member]
and is right next to a big picture of me "waiting for a ride" in the yearbook.
(If you want to see the picture, send an SASE to the GwD P.O. Box and I'll make
a copy of it and send it to you. Not that you'd really want to see me, though.)
It's from the Generation-X page or something. Yay. It's by Tony White who was
the Senior Class President. Woogie!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Life in the Gap
---------------
A lack of unity and resentment towards Baby Boomers makes our generation less
like "Generation-X" and more like "Generation Why"
*****
Slackers. Baby Busters. Twenty-somethings. These are all name used by the
popular media to describe America's thirteenth generation. Our generation is
heir to a five trillion dollar debt created by our parents. We are also facing
the worst job market in America since the end of World War II. Thirteen has
always been an unlucky number.
Our generation is marked by its diversity. Senior Joy Johnson said,
"Everyone is so incredibly dissimilar, generalizations are impossible to make."
However, we do seem to share some common values. Our generation is already used
to working for a living. "I work thirty hours a week," said senior Amy Thomas,
"so that I won't have to take as much from my parents." The idea of cleaning up
after our parents economic blunders provokes major attitude from many of us.
Senior Ben Heavner [Kilroy] said our generation is "annoyed at the world"
and ready to "kick some yuppie tail" in the workplace.
Everyone seemed to agree with sophomore Brian Melton's [a.k.a. Seamonkey and
something else I forgot, I don't know why I'm telling you this because he's not
in GwD] sentiments that baby boomers "screwed up a lot or stuff that they expect
us to fix." Melton also said, "I don't like the words that my parents use.
When they say 'groovy' or 'hip', it really peeves me."
Aside from our general disdain for baby boomers, very little unity is felt
by our generation. As Johnson said, "a clearly defined dogma for our
generation does not exist." The myriad of opportunity provided for us in the
late twentieth century has made us the most diverse generation in our country's
history. Unlike our parents, we have no spokesmen, wars or movements to bring
us together.
________________________________________________________________________________
PART E: Ach! (Pronounced "ock!")
This is a silly little poem by me.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I rock.
I have a cock.
I own a sock.
I wear a smock.
My door has a lock.
It makes people knock.
I'm glad I'm not a jock.
I don't like people who mock.
I like food cooked in a wok.
I need to spell check this block.
The only good beer is Shiner Bock.
I don't live near a dock.
I have something I want to hock.
A girl at work has a pock.
God, I'm tired of this schlock.
________________________________________________________________________________
PART F: Drugs
Here's some handy info for you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Pot-Grass
Dope-Weed
Roach-Joint
MaryJane
Uppers--Speed
Crank--Dexies
Coke--Rock
Toot--Blow
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is Crack?
--------------
Crack, sometimes call "rock", is the street name for a more refined, freebased,
form of cocaine that is smoked. Crack can be five to six times stronger than
the cocaine normally purchased on the street. It is believed that the drug is
named for the crackling noise it makes when smoked.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Are amphetamines used for medical purposes?
-------------------------------------------
Amphetamines are used for treating narcolepsy (a rare disorder marked by
uncontrolled sleep episodes) and minimal brain dysfunction (MBD) in children.
They also are prescribed for short-term treatment of obesity.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How Can You Tell If Someone You Know Is Using Crack?
----------------------------------------------------
An early sign of difficulty can be an abrupt breakdown in family communications
or change in a person's behavior. A marked change in personality, a loss of
interest in personal appearance, paranoid behavior or animosity toward family
and friends may all be significant.
Other symptoms include restlessness, anxiety, an inability to concentrate,
marked agitation, weight loss and altered sleeping patterns.
These symptoms, where young people are concerned, may often be signs of
anxieties experienced during adolescence [Parents: This means that there's no
way to tell if your kid is smoking crack or if he's just normal.], but if
illicit substances are involved they would probably be magnified. Other danger
signals include associations with new friends known to use drugs, or unexplained
disappearances of money and valuables from the house.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What are some of the immediate effects of smoking marijuana?
------------------------------------------------------------
Some immediate physical effects include a faster heartbeat and pulse rate,
bloodshot eyes, and a dry mouth and throat. No scientific evidence indicates
that marijuana improves hearing, eyesight, or skin sensitivity.
Studies of marijuana's mental effects show that the drug can impair or reduce
short-term memory, alter sense of time, and reduce ability to do things which
require concentration...qfaf...What was I typing?
________________________________________________________________________________
PART G: Posts
Here's some posts about neat stuff. From Snake's Den (I think.)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 5:41 pm Tue Aug 8, 1995 Number : 47 of 51
From: Unik Base : Fuck you, I won't do what you
To : ?? Refer #: None
Subj: ?? Replies: 2
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
All you people out there who are afraid of dem dar gangs at LHS who are
comin to get ya....well you had better hide under dem dar bed sheets tonight
because THE POOPOO HEADS are in full affect and are comin to get ya...you
betcha...so you better watch your back mudda phucka...thats right, me and
Lobo gonna rock your bed until you dun bounce out of it and on yer dern head
just like you did when you were 1 year old...you betcha...
PooPoo Heads Forever......JOIN US or get a nasty little bump on yer head!
Peace....I be outta her...you betcha...
Unik (or Eunuch - look it up!)
[Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me!] [47/51] :
Date: 11:25 pm Wed Aug 9, 1995 Number : 48 of 51
From: Iceman Base : Fuck you, I won't do what you
To : Unik Refer #: 47
Subj: Re: ?? Replies: 1
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
Unik slithered over to ?? and hissed the following drivel.....
<see above post, no since in showing quotes>
So, what are your colors?
[Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me!] [48/51] :
Date: 5:32 pm Fri Aug 11, 1995 Number : 49 of 51
From: Shatter Proof Base : Fuck you, I won't do what you
To : Iceman Refer #: 48
Subj: Re: ?? Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
<see above post(s), no since in showing quotes>
Their colors are gonna be brown..
Their enemys will be the Toiletpaper heads..
They will be decked in white..
Well I'm just guessin.. No pun intended..
[Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me!] [49/51] :
Date: 12:10 am Tue Aug 15, 1995 Number : 50 of 51
From: Izzy Base : Fuck you, I won't do what you
To : All Refer #: None
Subj: blah Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
??????????The Pirate's Cove?????????????????????????????????
? ?
? Over 15,000 files online including ?
? ?
? Cracks Mods Adult Gifs ?
? Cheats Vocs Utilities ?
? Trainers Wavs Doom Editors ?
? Games Graphics Renegade mods ?
? PC-Board PPE's ?
? ?
? DoomCon node 1466:666/7.0 ChiaNet node 155:806/10 ?
? RGSnet node 50:140/526 Fido Net node 1:38O4/0 ?
? ?
? Running Renegade 10/05 ?
? Two Node Ringdown ?
????????????????????????????????????????????(806)795-4926???
call now or something
<Had to leave that Cove ad in there. Heh. -Lobo>
[Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me!] [50/51] :
Date: 9:53 pm Wed Aug 16, 1995 Number : 51 of 51
From: Lobo Base : Fuck you, I won't do what you
To : Unik Refer #: 47
Subj: Re: ?? Replies: None
Stat: Normal Origin : Local
U> All you people out there who are afraid of dem dar gangs at LHS who are
U> comin to get ya....well you had better hide under dem dar bed sheets tonigh
U> because THE POOPOO HEADS are in full affect and are comin to get ya...you
U> betcha...so you better watch your back mudda phucka...thats right, me and
U> Lobo gonna rock your bed until you dun bounce out of it and on yer dern hea
U> just like you did when you were 1 year old...you betcha...
U>
U> PooPoo Heads Forever......JOIN US or get a nasty little bump on yer head!
U>
U> Peace....I be outta her...you betcha...
U>
U> Unik (or Eunich - look it up!)
do i know you? no, seriously, that's true. it's not actually how i would
have put it, but it's true.
[Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me!] [51/51] :
________________________________________________________________________________
PART H: Scout Crap
Here's some crap that a guy in my scout troop kept saying (scouts is damn cool.)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
<said in thick Irish accent>
In the province of Canille <sp>, the natives like to get RIP-ROARIN' DRUNK and
piss on the Blarney Stone. But the real fun comes the next day when the
tourists come to kiss it for luck!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Here's the slogans of our Philmont Trek (if you don't know what Philmont is,
you're beyond help.)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Have you taunted a burro today?
Burros are the chronic.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That is hereby accepted as the GwD slogan of choice. Look for souvenir "Have
you taunted a burro today?" and "Burros are the chronic." bumper stickers,
coming soon from your friends at GwD. Why not order our catalog? Check for
details in the Press Release section.
________________________________________________________________________________
That's enough "Cool Stuff" this time around. I bet you can't wait for "Cool
Stuff 2", can you? Well, you'll have to, because it will be in GwD100. -Lobo
________________________________________________________________________________
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A GwD, Incorporated logo - 1995
33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333
---------------------/
REVELATION: GREEN /
(The Ascension) /
by Sir Flea /
-------------/
In the Beginning, There was Grene. And only Grene. Until she made from
herself the basic colors. Blue, Yellow, and Redd. Redd she did not make, but
was spawned from the chaos that once consumed the universe.
Several million years later an asshole of a child was born, who's story is
explained in gwd30.txt. Then a really nice child was born sometime later who's
story is explained in gwd02.txt. The first child was the will of Redd given
form. He was evil, mean, and he shit his pants a lot. His mother was a whore,
and his father was a drunk. Because his father was always threatening to step
on him with his J.C. Penney pennyloafers, Redd's child now has an instinctive
fear of all pennyloafers. This sinister child was christened B0b. His real
last name is Johannsen, but because of his nature, the other children quickly
named him B0b Limekiller. Which is a title meaning "the destroyer of all that
is green and good." This child is the Anti-Greeny.
The really nice child was born of Susan "Yellowie" Hagstrom and James
"Blewie" Allen, it was not known at the time but their lives were being directly
influenced by the Basic Colors of those same names. The gods had also
influenced the other kids to give them those nicknames so that they could feel
important. They didn't. So this guy James knocked 'old Susan up, so they got
married. They had a nice little kid who they called Jacob "Greeny" Allen. Gee,
those were some creative people. As explained in gwd02.txt, he smiled, he
laughed, he even shit his drawers! It's really easy to see why we picked this
child to be our future emperor. This is THE Greeny. (Well, not really. See
part 5. -Ed.)
*The Revelation of Greeny*
Because the ultimate triumph of Greeny has not occurred as of yet, we at
the Greeny world Domination Task Force thought it necessary to show what will
happen when Greeny finally overcomes the power of Redd and becomes emperor of
the world. So you Dr00gs out there won't be scared when it happens.
So Greeny is having an average day, he woke up, shit, and brushed his
teeth. He ate his breakfast of Mashed Potatoes, because Greeny likes mashed
potatoes, and went with his friends to the mall. After walking around aimlessly
for about an hour, which is a requirement of going to the mall, Jacob decides
to go into J.C. Penney's. He buys a pair of pennyloafers and puts them into his bag. He likes
bag and sticks to his tried and true Converse for the moment. Unfortunately,
J.C. Penney's is right next to Cardinals, which everyone knows is a breeding pit
for Redd's evil doings. As Greeny walks by he feels weakened by the red sign,
and the minions of B0b Limekiller charge him and take him prisoner. Of course
they couldn't have done this if Greeny hadn't been up all night last night, and
wasn't so tired right now.
So the minions of Redd take Jacob before the Redd incarnate B0b
Limekiller. Greeny sees him and starts puking at the disgustingly funny
appearance of B0b. His hair is cropped short, his nose is long. His chest is
smooth as silk, his face is rough as sandpaper. His tattered red clothing makes
him look like a member of the Bloods after a gangwar. They tie Greeny to a
chair, but the minions are very stupid and Jacob escapes easily. B0b is amazed
and wonders how the hell Jacob escaped, and he shits his pants because he is so
afraid. Greeny starts complaining about the smell and kicks B0b in the face.
B0b starts whimpering and mumbling something about his daddy not doing it so
hard. Greeny starts calling B0b a faggot, and a goddamn mother-fucker and he
shouts something about how, "I'm gonna kick your ass, mother-fucker!" Because
Greeny doesn't like to lose sleep and he is very cranky. So he walks over and
starts pissing all over B0b, but he has forgotten that it is from urine, that
B0b gets his strength. B0b quickly stands up and grabs Greeny and throws him
across the room. Greeny is so thankful to be away from that awful smell coming
from B0b, that he doesn't even notice he's flying through the air until he hits
the wall. The collision jars the bag in Jacob's hand loose, and the
pennyloafers fall out onto the floor, as does Jacob's head. B0b yelps in
fright, and passes out. There is a big gap here where Redd's minions run away,
and B0b and Greeny lay there unconscious, so we'll just skip it.
Greeny is the first to awaken, and throws up because of the horrible
smell. After relieving himself, Greeny walks over and picks B0b up. Holding
him in one hand, and holding his nose with the other. If you are wondering how
bad the smell is, then imagine someone taking the spray of a skunk,
concentrating it, making a breath spray out of it, eating shit, spraying that
into his mouth, then waiting for an hour, and of course, breathing right in your
face. That's how bad it is.
Well anyway, Greeny takes B0b to his home and ties him up with strings
and ropes the color of green, so B0b will be powerless. Greeny whispers at him
to wake him up. Redd wakes up and starts crying, it annoys Jacob so much that
he slaps him with his brand new pennyloafers and then slaps him again for
getting pee on his brand new shoes. Redd is very mad by this time and starts
whining in his putrid little voice to Grene to help his son. Grene laughs in
his face and racks him for being so stupid. Meanwhile, down below, B0b asks to
use the phone, and Jacob kicks him in the balls for no apparent reason, so hard
that once again B0b shits his pants. So B0b calls all his friends in power
which is basically every dictator, president, or ruling party in the world, and
gets them all on conference call. He starts whimpering really loudly and Saddam
Hussein gets so disgusted that he reaches through the phone lines and slaps B0b.
Then B0b gets really pissed so he mutters the single word which no human being
can hear and live, he isn't too smart in this fact because if he hears it, he
will die too. But he says it anyway, and thankfully Greeny at the time was
listening to his favorite story by the Dead Kennedys, specifically, Night of the
Living Rednecks. So Greeny doesn't hear it. I'll write that word down here,
just as long as you don't read this aloud. If you do, you will die. So just
read it in your head. The word is...BAGATELLE! (GwD hereby relieves itself of
any blame for persons not heeding the warnings and saying "BAGATELLE" aloud. We
warned you not to read it. Don't come crying to us when you're dead.) Oh yeah,
might as well get back to the actual story.
When Greeny turns around and seeing B0b lying in a pool of vomit and
shit, he laughs his ass off. Upstairs in the heavens, Grene is laughing so hard
that she accidentally racks Redd again, then she does it again just because it's
so fun! Really, if you ever see the God Redd, just rack him. It really is fun.
Now, it seems that all the ruling parties in the world is dead, so Greeny gets
on the phone, which is still connected to every country (1st, 2nd, and 3rd world)
on Earth. He gets all the phones hooked up to loudspeakers in every country,
and says this. "PEOPLE OF EARTH! I AM YOUR NEW EMPEROR! YOU WILL FOLLOW ME!"
And there is a resounding cry of "WHY?" So Greeny responds with the now famous
reply, which I am not sure quite what it is because I didn't hear it, I was
listening to Dead Kennedys. Basically it gave Greeny all rights and privileges
of being a World Emperor. Countries rejoiced, brothers hugged, sisters hugged,
wars were stopped, and peace was achieved. The only form of violence left was
the hunting Redd's followers for fun. That's not really violence though is it?
So that's how Greeny will conquer all of the world and be a really neat
dictator. Of course, he will just be a figurehead and the real power will be
in the council. Read gwd10.txt for further explanation of that.
*Epilogue*
Greeny rules, yay.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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GGGGG GG DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG GG DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG GG DDDD DDDDD
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GGGGG DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG DDDD DDDDD
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GGGGGG GGGGGGGGG w w w w DDDD DDDDDD
GGGGG GGGGGGGGG w w DDDD DDDDD
GGGGG GGGG w w DDDD DDDDD
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GGGGG GGGG DDDD DDDDD
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GGGGGGGGGGG DDDDDDDDDD
GGGGGGGG DDDDDDDD
GGGGG DDDDD
GGG DDD
GG DD
G D
A GwD logo - 1995
44444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444
------------------------/