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-=-=-=-=-=-=-
- **************************************************************************
- *
- Evil Angels Presents... / *
- / *
- Anarchistic Tendancies... Part IV / *
- / *
- Taxi Cab... Nerd of the Year! /_____ *
- / *
- By / *
- / *
- Lightening Bolt / *
- *
- *
- **************************************************************************
+-------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| Ring these Boards! |
| |
| -> Pacific Island. 8902174. 300/300 ONLY. 24 hours a day! |
| |
| -> The Twilite Zone. 5620686. 300/300 1200/1200. 24 hours a day! |
| |
| -> Zen BBS 8996180 1200/1200 Running TBBS |
| 8996201 300/ 300 24 hours a day! |
| |
+-------------------------------------------------------------------------+
+-------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| |
| I would like to extend my thanks to Fearless Fred for the area he |
| provided on his BBS to make this entire effort possible! |
| |
| I would also like to thank Thelonius Monk and Fred for the assistance |
| I received in the process of publicising Taxi Cab's stupidity. |
| |
| I would also like to thank the others involved who played their parts |
| to perfection, but who would rather stay anonymous. |
| |
| Lastly, I would like to thank Taxi Cab for his stupidity and good |
| humour. |
| |
+-------------------------------------------------------------------------+
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What you are about to read may make you sick, my sincere appologies!
But this is REAL LIFE... Believe it or not!
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N E R D P R O F I L E
-----------------------
Name: Gordon (last name withheld)
Alias: Taxi Cab
Qix
Computer: Amiga 1000
Modem: Netcom 1234sa
I.Q.: 0.00
(Rounded off to 2 decimal places)
AGE: 16
Social Life: None detected as yet.
Home Life: Lives with Yuppy Parents in a Yuppy
suburb. Has been given his own phone line.
Must have had a very traumatic childhood!
We suspect that he used to kill ants, grubs,
and other such creatures that proposed no risk
to him before he had his computer bought for him.
General Comments: My first experience of the subject was on Zen BBS
I had just logged on and was receiving the main menu
(about 15 seconds after loggin on) when I received a
request from the subject to "go conference". Not being
rude, I went into the conferencing setion and greeted him.
The first thing the subject ever said to me was;
"Wot computa u use?????"
I was suspicious from the first. The Nerd Detection LED's
flashed on in my brain. I wasn't wrong...
---------------------------------------------------------------------
-----------------------------------
List of macros used by the subject.
-----------------------------------
PF1: /WHO
What this does is allow him to effectively monitor the users on
a TBBS system. By pressing the PF1 key he gets the list of the
others users.
PF2: /Send,1 Go conference!!!!!!!!!!
What this does, is once someone else logs onto the system, he
can send them the request to go into the conference mode with him.
PF3: Wot computa u got??????
This is the traditional nerd greeting. An acceptable nerdy responce:
"Orsum Amiga 1K!!!!!!!!!!! wot u got man??????????"
(Note the use of multiple punctuation marks - never been properly
explained why this is so, nor the phonetic spelling of words.
Several psycologists are working on this at the moment, and when
their thesis are published we hope to understand the nerd mentality
to such a degree that we will be able to detect and remove such
threats before they begin fester like Taxi Cab has.)
PF4: Got any NUI's, cards or outdials??????
This is the subject's way of saying;
"I'm C00L, I'm a hacker."
What it means is;
"I'm a nerd, I can't hack, I've got no friends, please be
nice to me and tell me something that I can blab to make
people think I know things that I don't have a clue about."
PF5: I'll talk to you some other time then..... Bye Dude.
This is the next key in sequence. After he has used the other keys,
the other person in chat with him realise what a nerd the guy
is, and leave.
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His Pride and joy...
---------------------------------------------------------------------
[[[[[[[[[ ttt !!! ]]]]]]]]]]
[[[[[[[[[ tttt !!!!! ]]]]]]]]]]
[[[ tttt !!!!! ]]]
[[[ tttt ccccccccc !!!!! ]]]
[[[ ttttttttttttt cccccccccccc !!!!! ]]]
[[[ ttttttttttttt ccccc ccccc !!! ]]]
[[[ tttt cccc !!! ]]]
[[[ tttt cccc !!! ]]]
[[[ tttt cccc ]]]
[[[ tttt ttt cccc ccccc !!! ]]]
[[[[[[[[[ tttt tttt cccccccccccc !!!!! ]]]]]]]]]]
[[[[[[[[[ tttttt cccccccccc !!! ]]]]]]]]]]
And that's a........
___ __ __
|\ /| /\ / \ | \ / \
| \/ | /__\ | |__/ | |
| |/ \ \___/ | \ \__/
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------------------------------
A day in the life of Taxi Cab.
------------------------------
10:00 Wake up.
10:05 Switch on computer. While booting, go to the kitchen and
ask mother to make breakfast for him. Return to computer.
10:07 - 14:00 Log onto Zen BBS, Pacific Island, Twilite Zone, Greyhawk
or any other BBS that the sysop has not yet thrown him off.
14:00 Ask mother to make lunch for him.
14:02 - 18:00 Log onto Zen BBS, Pacific Island, Twilite Zone, Greyhawk
or any other BBS that the sysop has not yet thrown him off.
18:00 Has to have dinner with mother, father and any other
relatives that might be there. Has to hurry, as the computer
is still switched on.
18:25 - 23:00 Log onto Zen BBS, Pacific Island, Twilite Zone, Greyhawk
or any other BBS that the sysop has not yet thrown him off.
23:00 Just for a change, today he'll have a shower this week.
Maybe he'll have a bath next week. He would hate his
bath toys to get lonely.
23:15 - 02:00 Log onto Zen BBS, Pacific Island, Twilite Zone, Greyhawk
or any other BBS that the sysop has not yet thrown him off.
02:00 Kiss his panda bear goodnight, go to sleep.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------
General Information:
--------------------
We set up a hacking area... The Elite... to please Taxi
Cab, as he was sure that there was a hacking area on the
Twilite Zone.
In this area were such hackers as Lightening Bolt (myself),
Fearless Fred, Thelonius Monk, Storm Cloud, Thunder Bird,
Conan (don't we wish!), and some other names that sounded cool!
In this area, Monk, myself, and Fred created about 70 or so
messages which would give any nerd in the real of Taxi Cab
the impression that we were the most efficient, organised and
successful hacking group Australia have ever seen, with details
of our achievements kept to a minimum... but including Austpac,
BHP, Elders, Westpac, the list goes on.....
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Here's an example of of the area.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
TO: Thunder Bird
FROM: The Assasin
SUBJECT: Re: Melb. Uni Outdial.
Yeah buddy, I've been working on the CAE Vax, damn
it's a fuckwit, you know the usual backdoor we use,
well the motherfuckers have plugged it. I don't think
they're onto us yet though. I'll get onto it again tonight
and just get the password file and work on it.
want the Monash Admin details please. Got an enemy I'd like
to fail last year!
latest on that NUI, it is now dead, don't try to use it, they
do an immediate trace. I think I might give it to some nappy
and let Telescum get up his ass!
Mike.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
TO: Masked Avenger (Private)
FROM: Fearless Fred
SUBJECT: What are you doing in this area?
You aren't a hacker! Piss off!
As for you Monk, pretty damn rude reading other's mail!
Piss OFF!
---------------------------------------------------------------------
TO: All
FROM: Thunder Bird
SUBJECT: You been up all night too huh?
Shit I am fucked guys! I've been downloading from the
US for the past 4 - 5 hours, in between chatting to
some cool US sysops. I've got this utility for decompiling a
UNIX password file, similar to the one we've got for the VAX.
I'll upload it now. This is one not to let out!
It's fucking good, and with docs on the latest UNIX revision
fuckups!
---------------------------------------------------------------------
TO: Fearless Fred (Private)
FROM: Fearless Fred
SUBJECT: Re: Should we give him access?
Monk, that's naughty, reading the sysop's
private mail to himself!
Think I should give him access to the Elite?
Na... I've met the twerp, and apart from almost dying
of laughter, I CAN'T STAND IT! (Him sorry)
It's about time you opened another stubbie Fred!
Ahhh... Foster's Lager!
---------------------------------------------------------------------
TO: Fred
FROM: CONAN
SUBJECT: EGO?
SCREW YOURSELF! I HAVE SKILL BABY, AND WANT THE MOTHER FUCKERS TO KNOW
ABOUT IT. IF THE BASTARDS ARE AS DUMB AS THAT, THEY DESERVE TO GET
WHAT I FUCKING GIVE THEM!
BUT I WONT SCREW UP. I HAVE A PERSONAL INTEREST IN ELDERS THAT I WILL
MAKE SURE THAT THIS ACCOUNT REMAINS FOR A WHILE SO THAT I CAN GET INTO
THEIR IMS CONTROL FILES. THEY ARE STILL RUNNING VERSION 19.3 OF IMS,
THAT IS ASKING FOR HACKERS! THEY WONT UPGRADE, SO ONCE I'VE SECURED
SOME OTHER ACCOUNTS THAT THEY WONT DETECT, I AM GOING TO SCARE THEM
SOMETHING SHOCKING! THEY WILL BEG ME TO STOP!
TILL NEXT TIME, KISS MY ASS!
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Anyone with 1/2 a brain could tell this stuff is UTTER
B U L L S H I T ! ! !
---------------------------------------------------------------------
After granting the little nerd access, we have been plaugued
by him ever since. So... after dropping his access, and
telling him to go away, we thought that that would be the
end of him. But... the twerp wouldn't go.
So... hence the release of A.T. 4. Please, Taxi Cab, take this
as a bulletin from the uses of Melbourne's (and where ever else
you have called) bulletin boards and GO AWAY!
Lightening /
Bolt /_
/ Strikes
/ Again!
---------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------
E V I L A N G E L S
----------------------
You too can help rid the world of nerds. By purchasing any of
the following quality offical Evil Angels Products.
"I hate the Masked Avenger" Badges $ 2-50
Evil Angels Windcheaters... $25-00
All sizes, all colours, design is Front: "I hate the Masked Avenger"
Back: "Evil Angels forever!"
Printed versions of Anachistic Tendancies Part 1 - 4
PLUS a full printout of the hacking area created
especially for Taxi Cab (A must for when you just cant
get onto that BBS you've been
trying to get onto for hours!)
$10-00
Rememer... donations to Evil Angels are NOT tax deductable,
but will help rid the world of nerds like Taxi Cab!
---------------------------------------------------------------------
This Edition's Awards...
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Nerd of the Year.... Who Else? Taxi Cab!
Salesman of the Year... Lounge Lizzard
Macro of the Month... Ford Prefect
Bastard of the Month... Masked Avenger
Fresh Faced Teenager Award... Disk Destroyer
Muscle of the Month... Radio Active
Drunken Slob of the Month... Fred of course!
Car of the month... (Also known as the
who admits to owning
a bongo award...) Thelonius Monk
Hoon of the Month... AGAIN! ECH!?
Sexual Pervert of the Year... Dianne Nicholls
Sinner of the month... SYN ...
Group of the Year... B.A.L.L.S.
Wimpy Moustache of all Time
(Actually, this was a draw.) Bozly
Da Wombat
SYSOP of all time... Craig Bowen.
We still like you even though we give
you a lot of shit award... The "don't shit me
man" Mentat
We never have liked you, and never
will, unless you piss off award... Taxi Cab.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Anarchistic Tendancies IV
(C) April - May 1988
YOU HAVE NO FUCKING RIGHTS!
**************************************
* NO PART OF THIS FILE MAY BE *
* PUBLISHED IN MASS MEDIA WITH OUT *
* THE AUTHOR'S WRITTEN PERMISSION *
* *
* - That's a god-dammed warning *
* *
**************************************
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
YOURMOTHERSUCKSCOCKSINHELL
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Disclaimer: The author(s) have gone to a hell of a lot of trouble to ensure
that this file contains no offencive material. However, should you find
anything which you object to, STIFF SHIT! You can't sue us!
This file is written with the intent of producing a humourous
file which will be enjoyed by everyone, and no offence is intended towards
any person or persons however much they are mentioned.
And please... don't send your dad's bruisers onto us Gordon!