💾 Archived View for cobaltblue.flounder.online › gemlog › 2021-06-24.gmi captured on 2022-04-28 at 18:39:46. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
⬅️ Previous capture (2021-11-30)
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There comes a time when you have to stop running from the truth.
My father was probably a dragon in human form.
He looked like the pictures my mom showed me but his skin was a darker shade, his eyes a different color, the scales over his whole body were much more noticeable.
I don’t know why but his presence was always inviting to me.
I wanted to go to him, to play with him, to be with him.
Maybe it was his way of letting me know, that I was as close to my mother and father as i ever will be, or maybe it was to show me it was okay to call him dad when my mother was no longer alive, or maybe it was a test for me, a test to show me that im ok, or maybe it was a test to prove to me, not everyone will accept me for who i am, and I have to accept that and continue to be true to myself… and I did.
It was only later in life that I thought about that transformation and what could have happened if he hadn’t met my mother and stopped running.
But then what would I be?
Would I have been able to grow up as I was supposed to grow up or would I have been different from the rest of the world?
Would i have been able to feel as normal as everyone else or would i have become something else… something much more rare and special and different than they were?
Or is the way i transform something that happens every time i transform from human to dragon… maybe it was that simple… i was different every time.
It had always been such a strange mystery for me.
After a few weeks of being here in this strange place that i just accepted as normal, a place that felt more than human, but also felt like a dream at times… like i could wake up anytime from this place and the strange beast that im a part of… that i believe i will be and go back to what im supposed to be.
I would walk through the city, swim in the ponds and rivers, run along the trails that were winding through the many woods that made up the rest of this strange land… I felt as if i could be anyone in the town but the only thing that i seem to want, that i seem to always want, is my father.
gradually i feel like i can stretch out. i begin feeling the wings and scales and my body seems to be changing, becoming a creature not of the earth but of the ocean.
i could be what i do see in my dreams. something that is so perfect that it has to be a dream, I know that it is and that is what makes me feel good, as i glide through the murky waters of the lakes.
My body is transforming in ways that I have never seen before, and if my imagination was just as great as my fathers, then i could do so much more than just transform into an animal.
Maybe my ability to transform was only a special talent, or maybe i was transforming because there was something else about myself that i never knew, or maybe it is something that is on my soul that i just haven’t been able to see until i transform.
Maybe im changing because im falling in love with the people in the city, maybe it is because I can see all that they are going through, because i can feel and see their emotions, and maybe i can change them for the better. but then i think, i am just fooling myself, and i have no right to try to change them… maybe that is what my father was trying to show me when he started taking me away from the city… maybe it is a way for me to be close to him and tell him that i appreciate everything he has done for me, maybe he knew that once he was gone that i would never find my way back, that i would never be able to call him dad… and now i am doing exactly what he wanted me to do… and maybe that is why he changed me… maybe it is a test… or maybe it is just what it should be.
All i know is that i will never stop, never stop searching for my father.
CHAPTER TWO
Something had begun to change in me, even if i didn’t know exactly what it was or how it was happening… my ability to transform seemed to be getting weaker. the other thing that had changed was that i was able to transform on a much quicker time frame, it felt like my whole body was on fire in a matter of seconds…
i didn't want to be stuck as a human. i wanted this possibility to be dragon to can go on forever… maybe this is how i could become the dragon my father was calling us… the dragon of our world.
My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a howl coming from a small room inside the city. The screams of fear reached my ears and the scent of smoke made my nostrils flare.
I left the water and bounded up to the door of the room, my tail wagging in excitement as I rushed in. I crashed through the wall and into the room, expecting to find the people from the woods with their strange abilities… my eyes went wide in surprise as i realized that they were all just humans, and they had been transformed as well… the humans were glowing with an orange color that made me realize that my father could have done this too… he could have transformed me into something that could touch and talk with all of the humans… something more… something that was more than my transformation into a dragon… something that was closer to his soul…
I couldn’t believe that it had only been a week, that he had transformed me after all those years… maybe he had been doing this all along, maybe my parents were some otherkin as well, and i am somehow actually one of them.
Suddenly a young woman from the village stumbled out of the room, her eyes blank with shock, and her body shaking in fear.
“Mama, mama, what is happening?” She yelled, tears rolling down her face, “I think i am burning, what do i do, what do i do?”
The old woman fell to her knees in shock, and her hands shook uncontrollably.
“Run… run to the village,” The old woman yelled out, “they will help you… they can help you.”
I could hear the faint sound of screaming as the woman ran into the village, but the smell of smoke lingered in my nostrils, and even though it was cold, the sweat was dripping down my body, making me shiver.
“Oooohh…” The voice from the other room began to speak. I watched in fascination as the young man began to transform into something i had never seen before… it seemed as if his entire body was changing, but his arms weren’t changing at all, only his hands and face… and then suddenly his arms grew out of his skin, and his skin grew, ripping and tearing off of his body. His body had transformed, it was like a whole other creature had taken over his body. His face was a beautiful thing, a mouth that stretched out like the mouth of a snake, and his body was strong, almost looking like it could rip apart stone if he wanted.
I felt myself transform in a way that I had never felt before… the temperature around me was heating up, my whole body was shaking as my wings began to grow, I felt a sharp pain as my tail slid out… but I didn’t let it stop me. I put my hand out to grab the man and pulled myself into his skin, he roared in pain as he pulled me inside of him. I felt myself inside of him, his entire body now was beginning to become something different, but his soul was in my skin… it was calling me… begging me to come inside…
I didn’t know what to do… my own body was in pain, it was changing into something that it never imagined it could be… but I wasn’t going to stop, I wasn’t going to let the humans be hurt. I was a dragon, and this was my gift… my own transformation. I was finally coming to my senses as I felt my eyes close, and I transformed myself into a dragon.
The man collapsed, his entire body sagging in a collapsed heap on the floor, and I watched as his soul faded, and it was just his lifeless body that fell on the floor.
I looked around the room, searching for the others. I searched every inch of the room, but it was empty.
I cried in shock… the dragons were all gone…
CHAPTER THREE
I walked through the village, my head held high, my face still glowing from the transformation. The residents of the village didn’t seem surprised at all to see me. I heard whispers from some of the other villagers as they watched me.
“Is that the dragon?” A man yelled out, “That’s the dragon that transformed me!” He had already transformed back to his human form, but the shift was still striking.
I didn’t bother to answer him, instead I went back to the village and collapsed.
“Oh my god…” A young girl said, “What did you do, why did you do that? Why would you just take someone that had turned into a human and bring them back to a dragon?”
I turned to face the young girl, her green eyes were focused on me in fear.
“I did nothing of the sort."
(I wrote the first two lines, then let the neural network run rampant with very little editing.)