💾 Archived View for gemlog.blue › users › saturn › 1619758274.gmi captured on 2022-03-02 at 03:34:37. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
⬅️ Previous capture (2021-12-04)
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When I was a kid, I used to hang out with yellow jackets at school. I'd let them crawl all over my hands & I knew I was safe. It was self-strengthening: the safer I felt, the safer we both were—me and the yellow jackets. It's a weird kind of confidence, and it sometimes gets called magic, but it's easy as the sunrise for a child to do. Children are magic because they haven't learned not to be. They're creative for the same reasons.
If you're a witch, you're usually pretty good at something. It's not just rituals and spells. Your herbs are a little stronger, or your divination is a little more insightful, whatever. It's like a narrow-focused luck charm. Mine, being a life-long mechanic and repairperson, is that when I fix things they get fixed faster, or things work for me that don't work for other people, or even the problem just disappears the moment I walk up to it or put my fingers on it. An ancillary benefit is that my skill and talent are useful to other people, and it's a kind of spatial creativity and conceptual transfer that I excel at.
I still make inks & read tarot, I still make sigils & medicines. I still have my rituals and superstitions and practices and private acts, and all that is intentional. But the more I think about it, the more I come to realize that "intention" is much more nuanced than I've come to understand it. Confidence, like when I was young and talking to yellow jackets, is closer to the heart of it than "I will do this thing" or "I will cause this result to happen," or even "I will nudge the balance of probability in a particular direction, with X amount of force." But for me, it's just that things just work.