💾 Archived View for malinfreeborn.com › gen › complaints.gmi captured on 2022-03-01 at 15:07:13. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
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I've been speaking with my friends a lot lately about the importance of complaining.
One complains often and well. If she's cold, she'll say so and a heater can be put on. If she's tired, sometimes others can help with small things. Mostly, I have no way to help, but I think she feels some benefit just in having the problem acknowledged.
I feel the complaints are refreshing after existing alongside too many people who want to be 'easy going', or 'not a bother', but inevitably end up resentful and irritable. In the long-run, unspoken complaints always pile up and fester.
Unskilful complaints can cause as much confusion as silence. People who cannot complain well will start complaints about people, rather than problems. They will assign blame, or manage to complain through a sneer.
Skilful complaints don't feel targeted towards anyone, and don't come with a sneer. They come up like a cough, attempting to dislodge phlegm, then die away, peacefully.