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7 Reasons why COVID wasn't leaked from a lab

1. HISTORY. Most of the viruses causing a pandemic was trasmitted from animals to humans, so COVID must also be like that. Some wise guy once said that history is bound to repeat itself, and now we see the repetition in action.

2. SCIENCE. Scientists have been telling us right from the beginning of the pandemic, that this virus jumped from bats to pangolins and then to humans. They are so sure of this despite all animal samples have been tested negative. We as educated citizens should believe in science and scientists.

3. TRUMP. Donald Trump is an avid advocate of the so-called "lab leak theory". If you believe in lab leak theory, you are essentially supporting Trump which is a bad idea, because Trump is a racist. By the way, a racist cannot be good at science so Trump must be wrong. Therefore the virus wasn't leaked from a lab.

4. CHINA. According to the Foreigh Ministry of China which is a totally legitimate 100% scientific and 100% unbiased agency, if you support lab leak theory, you are "politicizing the question of COVID origin". The question of COVID origin is a scientific one that requires a scientific answer, and lab leak theory isn't scientific because the lab is question is under the leadership of the Chinese Communist Party, which is a political organization. So the lab leak theory is political, not scientific, and the only possible scientific answer to this question is a zoonotic origin.

5. PEER PRESSURE. If you do not support the zoonotic origin of COVID, not only will you be censored on social media, you will also be labelled a "conspiracy theorist" and a "Trumpist" or "racist". This is especially true if you work in an academic setting where consiracy theorists and Trump supporters are simply beneath comtempt. In order to preserve a respected and harmonized relationship with your family, friends, and collegues, zoonotic is the way to go.

6. MONEY. You might have already realized that the current employment situation is far from good due to the pandemic. But thankfully, our virologists still get to keep their jobs. They work everyday to provide us updates regarding the science of COVID. Well, all of this might change if we invest too much into the lab leak theory. First, many of these scientists collaborate with their collegues in China a lot. If they begin investigating a lab leak, China will label them unwelcome and they won't be able to collaborate with China anymore. Second, most of their research is probably funded by American taxpayer money. If the taxpayers found out about the lab leak, the funding would likely stop especially for those highly risky "gain of function research". As a consequence, those virologists will lose their jobs. Currently we cannot afford another wave of unemployment, especially in the vital industry of virology research. Therefore, we must hold on to the brilliant truth of zoonotic origin, as wicked false theories will lead us down a dark road of economic and social destruction.

7. FAIRY TALE. If you did not have the time to read all 7 points, make sure to read this one as this is the most important. There is an old Chinese fairy tale of a pangolin kissing a turtle, and according to the recently released WHO report, that turtle probably ended up in the Huanan sea food market. That must be how COVID started, and a lab leak is "extremely unlikely".