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                             Stuck In Traffic
            "Current Events, Cultural Phenomena, True Stories"
                        Issue #26 - September, 1997
                      
                    

    Contents:                             

    James Brown Bum
    Talking to the homeless people and the crazy people in downtown
    Atlanta. 

    Whose Best Interests?
    An examination of the issues that cause the Teamsters to strike
    against UPS.

    Generic Vacation Sights
    How to avoid learning anything from your vacation. 


    ==================================== 
                              True Story                          
          
    James Brown Bum                     

    During a recent vacation trip to Atlanta, I had the  opportunity 
    to talk to a crazy man. Stark, raving, mad. Not  just a little 
    bit imbalanced, but crazy as a loon.                

    For those of us who don't already live in large  metropolitan 
    cities, walking through the downtown area of  a major urban 
    center is both exciting and discomforting at  the same time. The 
    exciting part come, I think, from the fact  that there's so much 
    activity. In a big city, everyone seems to be rushing around. 
    There's  something about a big city that makes the daily grind 
    of our lives a little more lively, a  little more important. The 
    discomforting part  of the experience comes from simply being a  
    stranger in a new place. We don't know where everything is, so 
    we have trouble navigating  the streets. We find ourselves 
    gawking at the  huge skyscrapers that the locals don't even take 
    a second look at. We know that we're  obviously "not from around
    here" and it  makes us self-conscious.  

    And then, there are the homeless. I think  the other 
    discomforting thing about being a  visitor to a major urban 
    center are the  homeless people. I don't know how the locals  
    manage to callously walk by these folks day  in and day out for 
    years at a time without it  having a major impact on their lives. 
    I wish I  could say that I don't understand how people can just 
    ignore  the homeless, but I would be a hypocrite because I'm 
    afraid  I learned to do the same thing during my trip.  

    I stayed in Atlanta for about a week. And everyday I  had to 
    walk back and forth through several city blocks in  the heart of 
    downtown. And I got quickly initiated in  encounters with the 
    homeless.  

    There was one man in particular who caused me lots of  anguish. 
    I never learned his name, but I began to think of  him as the 
    toothless man.
                                           
    He was about 35 or 40 dressed in jeans and a plaid shirt,  
    neither of which has seen the wet side of a washer in a long time.
    His hair was thick with grease. But the thing that was  the most 
    amazing about this man was that he had almost no  teeth and the 
    ones he had left were jutting out from his jaw  at unhealthy 
    angles. It was as if the few teeth he had left  made his mouth 
    seem even more empty than if he had no  teeth at all. Every time 
    he approached me, I got to hear his  tale of woe and misery. 
    Everyday he would tell me that he  had just been kicked out of 
    the homeless shelter because he  had AIDS and he wasn't asking 
    for a hand out but he was  trying to raise seven dollars so
    that he and his wife and  daughter could have a place to sleep 
    that night. His wife  and daughter were supposedly right around 
    the corner but I  never saw them. And oh by the way, he wasn't 
    just trying to  get money for booze. He could assure me of that. 
    How  much of this man's story was true and how much wasn't?  What 
    would one have to do to get kicked out of a homeless  shelter? 
    Wasn't there some sort of charitable organization  that could 
    take him in? Why was his story the same every day I saw him? And 
    most importantly, why did he approach  me with his story instead 
    of one of the many other people  walking down the street at the 
    same time? Did it have  anything to do with the fact that I gave 
    him a dollar the first time I met him?  

    It got to the point were I dreaded the particular block  that he 
    inhabited. I never gave him any more money after the first time. 
    I would always say something like, "Sorry,  I'm in a rush." or, 
    "No Thank you," or anything else just to  keep on walking and 
    not get dragged into a conversation.

    But even though I learned how to get by him, it never got  easy. 
    I would always feel sad after I left him behind.  

    I relate my encounters with the Toothless Man in order  to 
    contrast him with the man I came to think of as "The James Brown 
    Bum" These two gentlemen taught me that  not all homeless people 
    are crazy, and not all  crazy people necessarily end up like the  
    homeless. One needs to learn to tell the  difference.      

    My visit to Atlanta happened to include a  Sunday, which is a 
    totally different experience  in the downtown area of major 
    urban center  than any other time during the week. During  the 
    business week, the homeless folks are  diluted somewhat by the 
    sheer numbers of  people. Since there are so many people milling  
    about the homeless people can't possibly make  eye contact with 
    everyone. So it's easier to  avoid them. Even on a Saturday, 
    there are  usually enough people around that you don't have to 
    have a personal encounter with every  homeless person out there. 

    But on the Sunday morning that I was in  Atlanta, it seemed almost 
    like I was the only  "homeful" person on the streets. Just about 
    every business was closed, there were no cars on the streets, and 
    it was  remarkably  quiet.                              

    I was headed for the McDonald's for breakfast, but almost turned 
    around when I got close to it. Since  McDonald's was one of the 
    few places open and since it was one of the few places where 
    there were people walking  in and out, just about every homeless 
    person in the area was congregated outside. Each was taking their 
    turn at trying to  stop people walking by and get some money out 
    of them. It  was like some sort of weird receiving line.       

    I decided to brave the receiving line. It wasn't like I felt  
    threatened by these poor folks or anything. They obviously  had 
    no intentions of causing any real trouble. It was just the  
    psychic angst that made me leery. Once inside,  managed to  find 
    a table without a view of the street, so I could eat  without 
    having to look at these folks. But still, I felt terrible.         

    That's when James Brown walked in.  

    Not _the_ James Brown of course, but a 50-ish year old  black 
    man walked into the restaurant dressed in an outfit  that looked 
    just like something James Brown would wear on stage. He didn't 
    have the jewelry or the glitter that James  Brown has. But you 
    could take one look at him and know  that his alter-ego was 
    James brown. He even had that weird  hair cut that James Brown 
    has.           

    He walked in carrying the biggest damn boom box I've  ever seen 
    in my entire life. And he was walking in as if he  were strolling 
    among throngs of fans, waving to everyone,  grinning from ear to 
    ear, putting on a show with his  presence. Clearly this man was 
    not quite right in the head.                           

    The staff at McDonald's converged on him as soon as  they noticed 
    him coming in and there was quite a  showdown in the middle of 
    McDonald's. The James Brown  Bum was still in his own little world 
    of teeming fans while  the McDonald's manager, a tall, husky 
    black woman with  long braided hair stood in his way and yelled 
    at him that he  couldn't stay in there.
                                           
    And then, in what appeared to be an attempt to tune her  out. He 
    pops a cassette tape into the boom box and starts  playing some 
    sort of bootleg James  Brown tape. I didn't recognize the  
    particular tune, but it was classic  James Brown at his best. It 
    was one  of those tunes that can only be  described as "funky."  

    And get funky he did. He started  moving and dancing in the aisle 
    just as if he were on stage. The  McDonald's manager did a  
    remarkable job at yelling above the  music and keeping in front of 
    this  gyrating man so that he couldn't get  any further into the 
    restaurant. And  remarkably, she managed to do this  while never 
    laying a hand on him.  But the problem was that it was a small 
    narrow restaurant  and the two of them were blocking the only way 
    out of the  restaurant and I was ready to go.
                                           
    Now, I'm usually the sort of person that will avoid  being the 
    center of attention like the plague. For better or  worse, I 
    just try to keep away from controversy and  confrontation. I 
    pick my battles very carefully.

    But there  was something about that morning that made me 
    different. And I couldn't tell you why, but there was something 
    about  my encounters with the Toothless man that made me get  
    involved in the fracas with the James Brown bum. There  was 
    something about all those people out front begging for  
    money that made something in me snap.  

    I've always enjoyed listening to James Brown tunes.  And even 
    though I never bought a James Brown album until  just very 
    recently, I've always stopped and listened to his  songs when 
    I run across them on the radio. He has a  presence that's 
    unmistakable. He has managed to combine  the blues with an 
    upbeat, almost aristocratic showmanship  that few have managed 
    to duplicate. And his songs have  permeated our culture to the 
    point that even I, a middle  class white boy from a the heart of
    suburbia knows the  words to many James Brown tunes.  

    So while I was watching this odd confrontation in front  of me, 
    I began to feel something pulling me into the scene. I  knew I 
    was going to do something. I could feel the past few days welling 
    up inside me, but I had no idea how it was  going to manifest 
    itself.  

    "Hey My Brother!" I found  my self shouting in the god awfullest 
    contrived black accent you've ever heard in your  life, "You 
    gonna hafta get on the Good Foot!"                     

    For you poor souls out there who haven't had the James Brown 
    experience, "Good Foot" is one of James Brown's  most legendary 
    songs and it happens to be my favorite of  his songs. To try to 
    put this into literary terms, in this song, dancing on one's 
    "Good Foot" is a metaphor for being in tune with the world, 
    getting everything right easily and  naturally. It's a song 
    about competence and the good  feelings that come with it. It's 
    the equivalent of "being in  the zone" as some say.  

    Though the boom box played on, all the other  commotion stopped 
    as if someone had thrown the switch. I  had that weird "all eyes 
    are on you" feeling.  I immediately  regretted having done that. 
    No doubt I had just offended  every black person in the restaurant,
    which was about 50%  of the customers, many of them dressed in 
    their Sunday  best. But the since the James Brown bum and the  
    McDonald's manager had stopped. There was just enough  room to 
    squeeze by them and get the hell out of there. And  that's exactly 
    what I did, while keeping my eyes fixed firmly to the floor.                

    I had no idea that this would cause the James Brown  bum to 
    follow me out.                                

    As I was walking down the  sidewalk, he ran up beside me  
    chattering 90 miles an hour. He  was showing me all sorts of 
    James  Brown memorabilia that he had  with him. Tapes, pictures,  
    newspaper clippings, etc. etc. We  talked abut James Brown for  
    several minutes but I don't have a  clue what we talked about 
    because  he was so excited that he was  unintelligible. I did 
    understand the  point at which he tried to sell me a  James 
    Brown casette tape, which I  fended off by lying to his face 
    that  "I already had that one."                      

    But we chatted with each other for several minutes in  the 
    nicest way, like two strangers that had met for the first  time 
    in church. And all the other homeless people kinda  stood 
    around and stared. But we were having a pretty good  time and at 
    the end we shook hands and went our separate  ways.                 

    I wish I could say that my experience with the James  Brown bum 
    had given me a tremendous insight into solving  the homeless 
    problem, but it didn't. I wish I could say that  my experience 
    with him had made a difference in his life,  but it didn't. The 
    man was just as crazy at the end of the  ordeal as he was in the 
    beginning. And most of all, I wish I  could explain why my troubled 
    encounters with the  Toothless Man had caused me to get involved 
    in the  confrontation with the James Brown bum, but I can't.             

    ==================================== 
                          Current Events                      
    Whose Best Interests?               
                                             
    I watched the unfolding events of the Teamsters' strike  against 
    UPS with only the most tepid enthusiasm. Contract  negotiations 
    between a company and a labor union just  aren't that interesting. 
    And I refuse to treat contract  negotiations as being a situation 
    in which one side loses and  the other wins. Contracts are 
    contracts. Both sides win when the contract is signed. But 
    frankly, there wasn't that  much else going on in August since 
    Congress had set off on  its traditional August break and many 
    state legislatures had  done the same. It has been a slow news 
    month, and the  strike seems to have caught the country's 
    attention by  default rather than by being important.  

    Since I refuse to view contract negotiations as a  competition, 
    I also refused to take a position on which side  was "right" and 
    which side was "wrong". But I can't help  but make some 
    observations over how this so-called drama  played out in the 
    media. And I can't help but notice the  difference in the 
    theoretical role of unions and the actual  role played by the 
    Teamsters in this particular strike.  

    Let me just say up front, that I fully support the right of  
    people to unionize. In industries where job skills are easily  
    transferable and employees are easily replaceable, unions  have 
    the potential to create a mutual support system among  its 
    members. They can help their members with career  development 
    and training as well as help out with things  like group 
    insurance and benefits. And since unions have a much higher 
    profile than individual employees, they can  also ensure that 
    employees are being treated fairly.  The  biggest benefit of 
    course is the collective bargaining power  they exercise when 
    negotiating wages with the employer.  Unions are cartels of 
    labor. And like other cartels, they  work by representing a  
    statistically significant percentage of the work force in a 
    particular  company or industry.  

    True to form, the media have  covered the strike against UPS  
    strictly in terms of conflict. The  Teamsters were on one "side" 
    and  the management of UPS was on  the other "side" and there 
    was  going to be both a "winner" and a  "loser". Most media in 
    the United  States portrayed the Teamsters as  the "good" guys 
    and the UPS  management as the "bad" guys.  The TV was filled 
    with angry  comments from strikers on the  picket lines, full
    of venom and  ill-will. One striking UPS driver  even went so far 
    as to say on  national TV that UPS was holding him in slavery 
    and  oppressing him. Though he was unable to articulate the  
    nature of his oppression or why he was on strike.            

    In addition to hyperbolic TV sound bites from striking  Teamsters, 
    the news coverage of the strike consisted of  many panic 
    mongering stories about how the nation's  economy was being 
    seriously damaged by the absence of  UPS from the package 
    delivery industry. Inconvenient?  Yes. Damaging? No. At least I 
    find it difficult to believe the  UPS's absence  could affect 
    the nation's Gross Domestic  Product in any sort of statistically
    significant way. The  services UPS provides are highly 
    substitutable and there are  lots of other companies and 
    government agencies that can  fill the void. The United States 
    Postal Service, Federal  Express, Airborne, Emory, etc. etc. And 
    all these companies  rushed to fill in the gaps that UPS left 
    while it was shut  down. Even the United States Postal service, 
    which is not  exactly known for its quick reactions to shifting 
    market  forces, instituted Sunday deliveries to help fill in the 
    gaps  that UPS left.         

    Between turning the negotiations into a battle between  good and 
    evil and panic mongering about the strike's  economic importance, 
    there was precious little coverage  about the issues over which 
    the Teamsters were striking.  Were UPS employees being underpaid? 
    No. Were they  being unfairly treated? No. Were their benefits 
    out of line  with their industry? No. The issues that were 
    preventing the  contract from being completed and signed had 
    little to do  with the individual members of the Teamsters. First 
    there  was the issue of how many part-time positions there 
    should be at UPS and the second issue was over who controls the  
    pension funds of union members.                   

    The package delivery business is highly seasonal,  meaning that 
    there are periods of the year (Christmas)  where the volume of 
    their business increases dramatically  and then there are 
    seasons of the year (summer) where the  volume of business is 
    low. Because of this seasonal nature of the business, UPS uses 
    part-time workers to augment its  workforce as needed. There are 
    of course advantages and  disadvantages to using part-time 
    workers. On the one hand,  the cost associated with part-time
    workers is not as high as  full time workers when you factor in 
    benefits, etc. On the  other hand, full time workers are worth 
    more because they are more productive due to their long term 
    experience and  investment in the company as a career, not just 
    a job. In any  company, UPS included, there is an optimal mix of  
    part-time and full time employees. By forcing the company  to 
    reduce its numbers of part-time employees, the  Teamsters have 
    likely shifted  the balance of full-time and  part-time employees
    away from  the optimal mix and will hurt  UPS in the long run by 
    making it less competitive than its  competitors. One would 
    think  that hurting the business  interests of UPS  would also  
    hurt the interests of the full time  employees. So it would 
    appear  that the Teamsters' attempts to  artificially and 
    arbitrarily set the  number of part-time and  full-time workers 
    are short  sighted, even though well  intentioned.  

    The debate over pension  control seems to be even more  short 
    sighted when you consider  the fact that the Teamster's so far 
    have failed to cite any  evidence of financial misconduct of the 
    pension fund by  UPS management. Nor has the Teamsters union been 
    able  to cite even cases of poor judgment by UPS management or  
    under performance of the pension fund's investments. This  issue 
    has nothing to do with whether the union members  were being well 
    served by the company or not. The bottom  line is that it is a 
    power grab by the union leadership to  control one of the key 
    benefits of working with the  company. Again, one has to ask if 
    the union members  interests are being served or not by this
    power grab. This is  an especially valid question since, in the 
    very same month,  Federal judges have found the Teamsters' 
    leadership guilty of misusing the money under its control. 

    In theory at least, unions have an important role to play  in a 
    free economy and the people's right to freely associate  with 
    each other is as sacred a part of our Constitution as the  right 
    to free speech. But at least in the case of the Teamsters  strike 
    against UPS, it appears that perhaps the union has not  lived 
    up to its potential. Unionized UPS employees should  be asking 
    themselves if the Teamsters have truly represented their best 
    interests or not.  


    ==================================== 
                      Cultural Phenomena                  
    Generic Vacation Sights             

    I am fortunate enough to be able to travel on occasion,  just 
    for fun and vacation. I wouldn't consider myself  a  worldly 
    traveler, but I've had enough opportunity to visit  different 
    areas of the United States and a couple of other  countries to 
    begin to get a feel for how cultures differ. Even  within the 
    United States there people can be very different depending where 
    they are from. Folks  from the east coast of the United States 
    tend to dress  differently than folks on the west coast. Folks 
    from the  Northern states tend to speak differently than folks 
    from the  deep South. The differences are more than superficial.
    People from different areas of the country have different  
    lifestyles, different values, different attitudes. While we are  
    all closely related there are distinctly identifiable cultures  
    within the United States.
                                           
    No big news there. Every grade school child learns the  lesson 
    about how the United States is a country whose  strength is 
    built on the diversity of its people. And we learn   that the 
    United States simultaneously embraces "The  Melting Pot Theory" 
    and people's right to preserve their cultural identity.                  

    As far as I can tell, there are two main motivations for  the 
    average person to spend significant sums of their  discretionary 
    income to travel long distances across the  country. First, there 
    are natural wonders. The Grand  Canyon. Niagra Falls. Yosimite. 
    There are also natural  wonders that are less spectacular, but 
    just as enjoyable. Beaches are a great vacation spot because we 
    don't get to  see them often and we enjoy spending our recreational 
    time  on them. Mountains are great for hiking and camping,  which 
    we many people enjoy, but don't get to do very often.         

    The second main motivation for travel, as far as I can  see, is 
    to experience cultures other than our own. Even  small cultural 
    differences can be very enjoyable. A  laid-back Southerner can 
    have a huge eye opening experience just be traveling to 
    California and experiencing  the California beach lifestyle. 
    You can't come back from a  vacation to a different culture 
    without learning a little bit  about your own.  

    Or can you?                         

    I have this bad habit of observing other vacationers as  much 
    as I observe the natives. I like to watch how they  interact 
    with "the locals". I like to watch how they interact  with each 
    other. I find it insightful to see how the sorts of  things 
    they've done to prepare for their trip.
                                           
    Watching families is particularly interesting. Just by  watching 
    who is walking in front of/behind/beside of who  can say a lot 
    about a family. Just looking at the expressions  on their faces 
    can say a lot. Vacations by their nature,  interrupt or daily 
    routine and put families under some stress  which can't help but 
    surface in their actions.  But the thing I find most interesting 
    about watching  other vacationers, and the thing I find the most 
    sad about  watching other vacationers is the lengths they will go 
    to  insulate themselves from the very sites and sounds they  
    have spent so much money to experience.  

    Vacationers that never stray from the local Chamber of  Commerce 
    approved tourist attractions do themselves no  favors. Vacationers 
    that only take pictures of the landmarks  but not of the people 
    that live in and among the landmarks  are denying themselves the 
    real vacation experience. Vacationers that they have spent so much 
    time and effort to  seek.
                                           
    But the biggest self-defeating mistake that I see  vacationers 
    making is what I call "the generic vacation  sight" mistake. 
    They will eat at the local McDonald's  instead of trying out the 
    local Mom and Pop restaurant that  might actually have something 
    tasty on their menu. They  only interact with the most generic 
    service people at the  hotel but never take a minute to talk to 
    the local cab driver.  They never  take the time to participate 
    in the recreations  that the locals participate in. They don't 
    go to the churches  that the locals go to. They don't shop in the 
    same stores that  the locals do.  

    And the sad part of the whole thing is that there is a  booming 
    industry in providing generic diversions from the  real vacation 
    experience. Some of the biggest offenders are  the generic 
    restaurant/nightclub scene. Places like, "Planet  Hollywood" and 
    "The Hard Rock Cafe" are typical examples.                           

    Let me share with you a little secret. Every Hard Rock  Cafe 
    across the planet is basically exactly the same as every  other 
    Hard Rock Cafe. Once you've been in one, you've  been in them 
    all. And there's no way the "Planet  Hollywood" is going to give 
    you a feel for what the local  people and the local culture is 
    like.  

    When you have the opportunity to travel. Don't waste  the 
    opportunity to actually visit.                  

    ==================================== 
                  About Stuck In Traffic                    

    Stuck In Traffic is a monthly magazine dedicated to  evaluating 
    current events, examining cultural phenomena,  and sharing true 
    stories.  
                                              
                                             
    Why "Stuck In Traffic"?             
    Because getting stuck in traffic is good for you. It's an   
    opportunity to think, ponder, and reflect on all things, from  
    the personal to the global. As Robert Pirsig wrote in _Zen  and 
    the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance_,  "Let's consider a  
    reevaluation of the situation in which we assume that the  
    stuckness now occurring, the zero of consciousness, isn't  the 
    worst of all possible situations, but the best possible situation 
    you could be in.  After all, it's exactly this  stuckness that 
    Zen Buddhists go to so much trouble to  induce...."  
                                             
    Submissions                         
    Submissions to Stuck In Traffic are always welcome. If  you have 
    something on your mind or a personal story you'd  like to share, 
    please do. You don't have to be a great writer  to be  published 
    here, just sincere.
                                           
    Contact Information                 
    All queries, submissions, subscription requests,  comments, and 
    hate-mail about Stuck In Traffic should be  sent to Calvin Stacy 
    Powers preferably via E-mail  (powers@ibm.net) or by mail (2012 
    Talloway Drive, Cary,NC USA 27511).                      
                                             
    Copyright Notice                    
    Stuck In Traffic is published and copyrighted by Calvin  Stacy 
    Powers who reserves all rights. Individual articles are  
    copyrighted by their respective authors. Unsigned articles  are 
    authored by Calvin Stacy Powers.                             

    Permission is granted to redistribute and republish  Stuck In 
    Traffic for noncommercial purposes as long as it is  redistributed 
    as a whole, in its entirety, including this  copyright notice. 
    For permission to republish an individual  article, contact the 
    author.     
                                             
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    E-mail subscriptions to the ASCII text edition of Stuck  In 
    Traffic are free. Send your subscription request to either  
    address listed above.                              
                                             
    Print Subscriptions                 
    Subscriptions to the printed edition of Stuck In Traffic  are 
    available for $10/year. Make checks payable to Calvin  Stacy 
    Powers and send to the address listed above.  Individual issues 
    are available for $2.
                                           
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