💾 Archived View for clemat.is › saccophore › library › ezines › textfiles › ezines › BOMB › bomb004.… captured on 2022-01-08 at 15:00:50.
⬅️ Previous capture (2021-12-03)
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gggg ggggssssgggg ggggssggggssgggg gggg $$ssssgggg $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ssssgggg $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ssss$$ $$ssss$$ $$ $$ $$ssss$$ ------------------------------------------------------- b l i s t e r s - o n - m y - b u t t ------------------------------------------------------- issue 004 - "BEING SINGLE == GOOD" by edicius ------------------------------------------------------- contact: http://www.alt164.com/bomb or bomb@alt164.com ------------------------------------------------------- YOU WANNA KNOW WHY BEING A SINGLE MAN IN THE 90'S IS A REALLY GOOD THING? LET ME TELL YOU. FIRST, YOU DON'T HAVE ANY BITCHES TELLING YOU WHAT TO DO. YOU DON'T HAVE TO HEAR ANYTHING LIKE "TOM PLEASE SHAVE THAT BEARD OFF OR I'LL BREAK UP WITH YOU. IT HURTS WHEN YOU GO DOWN ON ME." LISTEN BITCH, WHEN I WHANT TO PUT VASELINE IN MY BEARD, I'M PUTTING VASELINE IN MY BEARD. I DON'T CARE IF IT HURTS YOUR VAGINA OR NOT, IT'S MY BEARD. NEXT, YO UDOT'N HAVE TO HEAR A BITCH SAY, "TOM PLEASE STOP SNORING. TOM. ARE YOU AWAKE? TOM STOP SNORING. I CAN'T SLEEP WITH YOU SNORING LIKE THAT. PLEASE STOP SNORING. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I SWEAR I'M BREAKING UP WITH YOU THIS TIME. DO YOU EVEN HEAR ME? DO YOU CARE? WAKE THE FUCK UP." LISTEN BITCH, IF I SNORE I DON'T FUCKING CARE. AS LONG AS I'VE GOT A TIT IN MY HAND AND A BLANKET OVER ME, I'M GOING TO SLEEP REALLY FUCKING WELL. I DON'T CARE IF I KICK YOU OR KEEP YOU UP ALL NIGHT. STAY THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR BED WHEN I'M PASSED OUT. YOU ALSO DON'T HAVE TO HEAR ANY BITCH SAY "TOM WHY ARE ALL YOUR EX-GIRLFRIENDS DEAD? THAT REALLY DISTURBS ME. HOW COME YOUR FAMILY KEEPS TELLING ME THAT I SHOULD MOVE TO NEW HAMPSHIRE? I THINK WE NEED TO TALK." BITCHES SHOULDN'T BE ASKING QUESTIONS LIKE THAT OR ELSE THEY BE GETTIN' KILLED. YOU ALSO DON'T HAVE TO HEAR ANY BITCHES SAY "TOM I DON'T LIKE THE WAY YOU'VE BEEN TREATING ME. I THINK IT'S TIME THAT WE STOPPED SEEING EACH OTHER. I REALLY DIDN'T LIKE THE WAY YOU KEPT POKING ME IN THE SIDE WITH THAT KITCHEN KNIFE WHEN I WAS TRYING TO SLEEP." BITCH, NO ONE BREAKS UP WITH ME. I'LL FUCKIN' SHOW YOU WHAT A KITCHEN KNIFE FEELS LIKE, MOTHERFUCKER. FUCKIN' CUNTRAG. THE LESS BITCHES THAT ARE AROUND, THE LESS BODIES THE MIDDLETOWN POLICE DEPARTMENT WILL FIND SCATTERED ALONG NAVESINK RIVER ROAD. NO BITCH IS GOING TO TELL ME THAT I SPEND TOO MUCH TIME ON THE INTERNET. NO BITCH IS GETTING BETWEEN ME AND STREET FIGHTER 2. FUCKIN' BITCHES DON'T KNOW SHIT. ------------------------------------------------------- (c) jesus was a wanker press, 1998, biznatch. -------------------------------------------------------