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School's been let out for the summer. It's one of those hot August nights where you can't really think of anything to do as you sit and watch reruns of "Good Times" with two good friends. Then, you get an idea. You get on the internet and find this textfile, which lights up your eyes. This won't be any ordinary night!
LEGAL JUNK: I'm not responsible for anything that goes wrong with the plans in this textfile. As far as I'm concerned, this file is for entertainment purposes only.
NOTE: After you read this, you may wonder "Where are all the bombs and other stuff that blows up?" There is a simple reason: I'm not into that kind of stuff. I find you can have just as much fun, if not more, with stuff that doesn't explode (I do use firecrackers and other stuff that is only for the sound and effect). I am into things that don't pose a risk to other people, things that just make them scared, mad, and short a few bucks.
SUPPLIES:
3 black backpacks (To put stuff in. 1 per person)
Lots of firecrackers
Money (About 60 bucks, to be safe)
3 dozen eggs
12 cans of shaving cream
3 bicycles (1 per person)
9 boxes of sparklers
3 cans of WD-40
3 BIC lighters
3 flashlights
Extra batteries for flashlights
1 five foot long steel cable
6 quarts of used (black) motor oil
Cell Phone (In case you need to call for a ride home)
Fake toy gun
Radio control car
A small sheet metal tray mounted on top of the R/C car
12 cans of Pepsi (Not to drink. To explode!)
Some cheap greasy salami
8 box of mothballs
Black spraypaint
Tomatoes
bottle of bleach
8:00
Load up all of the stuff and go to local 7-11. Get Coke Slurpees.
8:15
Go to rich preppy niegborhood. Take the spraypaint and paint all of the whitewall tires on cars black until you run out of spraypaint.
9:00
Ride to kid you hate's house. Do the following:
Throw all tomatoes at the garage
Throw 2 dozen eggs at house
Paint profanity with shaving cream on your victim's lawn. Use 3 cans.
Put salami on your victim's parent's car. Put it in a very noticible place like the hood or roof.
Put a box of mothballs in the gas tank of the car.
9:30
Go to another neigborhood. Take the 6 boxes of mothballs and put 5 mothballs in each car's gas tank until you run out of mothballs.
10:15
Go to anther kid's house who you hate. Do the following:
Pour the bleach on their lawn.
Take the last box of mothballs and put it in the kid's parent's car's gas tank.
Pour the motor oil on the roof of the car.
Paint expletives on garage door with 3 cans of shaving cream.
Throw the last twelve eggs at the house.
Take Pepi cans and shake them up and then throw them on the ground at a 45 degree angle.
10:45
Go to local bar. Don't go in. Do the following:
Put firecrackers in tray on top of R/C car.
When a drunk stumbles out, light the firecrackers on the car and take the toy gun out. Drive the car behind the drunk and yell "FREEZE!" and point the gun at him. Start squeezing the trigger when the firecrackers start to go off. It'll scare the crap out of the drunk.
11:15
Go to some nearby railroad tracks and get within 100 feet of a crossing with gates. Put the cable across a track. Stand on one end of the cable that is on a rail, and get a friend to do the same on the other rail. The gates at the crossing will go down. This is how trains get the gates to go down, because the axle on a locomotive is one solid piece of steel and it shorts out a very low current, which, somehow, makes the gates go down.
11:30
Take the WD-40 cans and make torches out of them by spraying them and holding the BIC lighter up to the nozzle and light it. You now have a few minutes to leave burn marks on white cars and houses with white siding.
11:45
Light the sparklers and spray the remaining cans of shaving cream all over place in a wild rampage of joy after completing a night of great accomplishmnts.
12:00
Go home after a very fun night.
Well, that just about wraps it up for now. Have phun!
The Enphorcer
2-25-01