💾 Archived View for envs.net › ~vitorg › blog.gmi captured on 2022-01-08 at 13:53:03. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
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i'm kinda sad, i'm also kinda sick. in the christmas eve, i actually got to the church 20h. also i didn't slept in between my post and that. after the mass, i got to a friend's house, there we drinked champagne and tequila, it was somewhat cool. also, i felt a peace after the mass, i stopped being obsessive about maria and yeah, it was really good for my person. but yeah i slept around 3am, woke up in christmas 10:30 in the morning, my cousin's husband had to deliver ~13kg of pork here, we cut it up and put in some plastic bags. after that, me, my father and my other cousin (the one that sings) got to my grandma's house in a farmhouse. there was wine, i drinked a whole bottle of wine then slept after that (it was really sweet). when i woke up, my cousin was gone, people also got there when i was sleeping (my 3rd degree cousins) and we were having very fun (there was liquor (translator says liquor = brazilian pinga/cachaça) and i drinked a lot too). we played soccer and hide and seek, it was cool. then my father got home, i stayed there with my 3rd degree cousins tidying up the place to sleep, then we slept in a tent outside, it was a great night of sleep, even tho i slept around 3-4 hours. when we woke up, we disarmed everything, had breakfast and just chatted for a while. then we had lunch, everybody were lazy, except me. then i did nothing until the evening, when we started drinking caipirinha (a brazilian drink, with lemons, sugar, ice and cachaça) non-stop until 10pm, then we (me, my father (who got there in the morning) and my cousin that sings) got to a gas station nearby home, drinked and sing a lot (i mean, A LOT) and then i got home around 3am. slept right when i stepped in my bedroom. woke up around noon today, i'm addicted (again) to maria victoria, i started using instagram just to see what she's doing, her singing and things like that. also, i'm into sertanejo because of her (mainly; my cousin that sings also is a inspiration for this) and i also started playing more guitar since the last day i posted here. i also promised to everyone (and i will promise for you, i'll be rich 3 months from now) that i'll be rich, because i will (duh). i want to make a show with maria victoria when i get rich, also give a dodge ram to my father and yeah just be happy with my monies and (maybe) with maria. i'm planning waking up earlier to confess, i'm meaning to it but i don't no nothing. that's it. happy new year, in the case i don't post this year anymore.
i feel somewhat unmotivated. yesterday i got to a concert (no, not classical music (actually it would be "comparable" to country music in the US)) of a now famous girl in brazil. she got to the finals in the voice br (for those who don't know, the voice is basically a got talent for singers (but it actually works, people there can sing)) and then now she finalized the christmas program for the municipal government. she looks really nice (not in the sense of looks, but in the sense that i want to talk with her and sing with her because our voices sound cool together (not sing in a professional way, i just want to jam with her)) and humble, i think i fell in love, i even choked with water (thing that almost never happens) because i was thinking about her (after the show) and it was incredibly cool (despite being unconfortable, i choked duh). yeah but now my plans is to get rich so that i can work with my father's company (ironically, event producer (this meaning i'll work with the girl i described up there (to brazilians that didn't see there was a portuguese version down there, it's Maria Victoria))) and then i get richer and then i buy a librebooted x220 and the ultrabase for it. also i want to give job to people that want to work and earn their hard worked money. i'm now into politics again, i'm a anarchocapitalist (cringe, i know) (since i was poor (really poor, i didn't had rice to eat back in the day) i was thinking about abolishing the state because it makes things not work as they should) who never read a lot about it, now i'm buying rothbard's The Anatomy of the State (cool book, i read ~10 pages of it in a pdf (but pdfs don't work for me as books, only as sheet music ig (i never tried sheet music in paper so idk, probably it would work even better if it was written in a piece of paper idk))) and Communist Manifesto (because i need to know the opposite idea so that i can compare the arguments and choose what's right for me) for a cool reading. around 18h i'll go to the church, i like christmas mass (is it mass that they talk? i just startpaged it and it says "missa" == "mass") so yeah. actually, i got back to church, i need to confess with the priest but now i think i'm lighter. that's it i think, i drifted too much my brain because i didn't sleep very well (yeah, i'm sick because of Maria Victoria) and i can't anymore since i'll have to go to church 18h and now it's just 10h. (yeah, the hour is the first hour i think about writing it.) so yeah merry christmas i see you soon ig
Now I feel more normal. I don't use things like Airline for vim, i made my own statusline with vim script (if you think about it, Vim Script is VS, and Vim Script code could be called VS code) (no, i don't know lua thingy for neovim (even though i use neovim)) and i use cmus to listen to music instead of mpv + poorly written 3liner that reads youtube urls from a file. Talking about that, there are no tags on my music, so if i could tag them manually i would do that. Please, recommend me software through matrix or email. In this meantime, i stopped using Firefox, migrated to qutebrowser and now i'm back to Firefox. Talking about using specific software, i'm sadly now using discord because my friend talk with people there about free software but he doesn't know much, then i help him in the conversation. Recently, i think i fell in love with someone that's somewhat "random" (yeah, she's not random, she was just a so special person that it doesn't make sense), i know her since i was 6yo and i've noticed that she was a person that i'd love having a intimate relationship. She sadly lives 700km away from here, but i sincerely don't care since my mom lives right there and i'm always visiting her. Talking about my mom, i had some problems here with my stepmother and she doesn't look like she wants me here. It's sad that even my mom can't support me there. Anyways, the way to go is living with my father right here and talk with that girl via some normie social media like instagram or whatsapp (sadly). Ultimately, too much things have changed and i'm too lazy to write them all here.
Let me describe my dream: I was in a war and I piloted planes, but I wasn't with uniform and such. There was our base, we just played there. Sometimes I got out to fight, then I shooted at the enemies. Sometimes, too, I got out of the plane and just shoot everyone in foot, on their bases (idk if that was bases). On our base, there was some of my best friend (of my life) and the girl I like today. There was a thing just like they have for school, where we put food and things, it looked like a buffet. When i was getting food, the girl I like started flirting with me, but it was just some vague moments, but it was great. One of my friends appeared and she said "How I'm going to pay you?", then he said "Of course (you won't), you have a Bradesco card" (Bradesco is a brazilian bank, and there's no sense in "you can't pay me if you have x bank's card). My other friend always stayed in a small room, probably controling drones or something like that, sometimes he got out just to get food, just said some 2 or 3 words and entered the room again. But man, they looked so confiant, nobody there talked about war (at lesat in a serious way), I can't understand. Just I was the one who thinked about "oh, i'll fight now", but it was more for fun then for "defending my country" or something like that. What was also strange, is that enemies shooted at me but I was kind of shielded, idk. Yeah, that was the dream.
Yesterday, I woke up 8AM (to work at 9AM), i finished the job, then it was 12:30PM. After that, I got to the gas station and drinked a coke, then my boss invited me to go to the pool there, I got my payment after I got out of there. 4PM I and my father got out to a bar (pretty famous here) and then we got to the gas station again. I got my guitar at home and on the way there was a (cool) guy who teached me how to sing better, and then there was two girls just in the entry of the gas station, i played guitar to them, all 3 of them appreciated my playing (yay!). After that, I played to my boss and my friends (yes, my boss is pretty much just a friend) and they said I play bad (because i can't strum, just pull the strings (i'm kinda pro on that)), then I got sad and angry for some reason (i costume not caring about it). Ok, then some other random guys got there and they started singing (out of tune) and they took my guitar to play (grr). In the mean time, my stepmother said that i needed to sleep in her bed because she took mine to sleep in the living room with her nephew (without my permission). After that, my father noticed I was pretty much goat, then he paid a wine bottle for me, I drink it all and got to sleep, it didn't help.
Big day, woke up 11:30 and got to school. First, english class, it was kinda boring because it was about readinng hours on the clock (if you are reading this, you probably understand my pain). After that, arts (idk if it's a real class outside Brazil), another boring thing. Last one saved a little, but the portuguese teacher wasn't that great today. Got home, my father said that now i'll wash my own clothes, but it's actually good since my stepmother wasn't washing it properly. After, we got to the gas station to drink a coke, it was great. Get to home around 22h, made an alias to sync the website code with the server and organized some things. In general, it was somewhat of a cool day, excluding the disagreements and the bad classes.