💾 Archived View for rosenzweig.io › gemlog › 2020-11-08-gemini-day-9.gmi captured on 2021-12-17 at 13:26:06. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
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I shamelessly stole solderpunk's offline-first email setup with getmail and msmtp, adapted for mutt and multiple email accounts (personal and university on the same machine). Somehow separating downloading/uploading mail from reading/drafting adds an immediate psychological wall. I did execute my `do-mail.sh` script two or three times today (one time motivated by a one-time email verification to sign up on a website), but if that's down from seven or more checks yesterday and fourteen the day before, it sounds like it's doing its job.
solderpunk's "Progress towards 'offline first'"
We'll see in the coming days and weeks whether such an offline-first approach will harmonize with my requirements, but for now, I'm cautiously optimistic. One immediate effect: offline mail is _fast_. Like, I've been running IMAP clients or text clients over SSH for years and have become accustomed to opening mail taking ages. Having everything cached locally and having mail open instantly is an excellent change of pace. Funny that my computer is fast enough to compile Mesa without breaking a sweat, but reading email in 2020 requires delicate optimization. Admittedly bloated HTML messages and massive attachments aren't helping, especially when the network is the bottleneck.
After cutting out the B.S., minimizing instant messaging, and adopting offline-first email, I am no longer a prisoner to the flood of information. I would like to extend a warm thank you to Geminispace for setting and keeping me along the path to squashing irrelevancy.
Unfortunately, not all is well in the quiet Internet.
Trying to curb compulsive Internet usage by blocking specific websites or applications is playing a game of whack-a-mole with software habits. If I removed Reddit, I would read Hacker News instead; remove Hacker News too and you'd find me curled up with lobste.rs. Cutting _all_ such websites _simultaneously_ -- and crucially, committing to doing so publicly on my gemlog -- *can* with luck cut out the entire class of information. Theoretically that should be a win.
Unfortunately, even that does not satiate the incessant need for new information. Cut out my entire access to the web, and I could spend hours reading old posts on gemlogs. Regardless of the web's role in causing this sort of issue, it clearly does not end with the web, either.
What if I cut my entire access to the Internet? Might that help? What about computers entirely? I'm not sure it's worth discussing these questions. For better or worse, the Internet has become as essential as food for many of us; the pandemic has only exacerbated the dependency. My studies, work, hobbies, friends, and family are all mediated by electronics. Stepping away from it all, as I did yesterday, is no doubt refreshing, but it amounts to putting life on pause.
Putting life on pause can be a good thing one day a week.
For the other six days, responsible use will matter more than abstinence. Responsible use of something so potent and rife for abuse is a tall order, and without the support of Geminauts, I would not be on day 9 of seriously trying instead of resigning to the impossibility of the task.
I don't think it's hopeless. I have noticed one change already: when the Internet is off, I don't miss it. I don't feel the need to check my email if I'm outside, nor do I feel the need to read Wikipedia when I'm in a console offline composing my gemlog. That's more than I could have said a week ago.
Unfortunately, the moment I open a graphical session and enable wi-fi, I am back to seeking novelty, whether that come from Reddit or CAPCOM or a Wikipedia dive. I could try to prefer text consoles, as conditioning if nothing else, but I suspect the effect would wear off as soon as I become comfortable.
I don't have the answers. I don't know how much I don't know. It is easy to blame myself in all this, but knowing that I am not alone grappling with these issues makes it easier to show kindness to myself. Given how many years I have been inundated by Internet, I should not expect 9 days to suffice to undo the damage.
Still, there is one silver lining: there will be a day 10, and a day 11 after, and as many days as I need. Regardless if I'm writing to a void or the entirety of CAPCOM, the accountability keeps me from giving up and going on a guilty B.S. binge. I can't use the justification "who cares?" to sabotage myself; if there is a single reader who does care (and I know you do, t <3), I cannot write away the externalities.
Besides, daily gemlogging about the web or the lack thereof in my life has become a useful routine, and you _know_ how this filly feels about breaking her routine :-)