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ERS (Northwest Rules)

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These are the house rules of "Egyptian Rat Screw", or ERS for short, as played at my high school in the late 2000s.

Starting the Game

- The game is played with a standard deck of 52 playing cards with Jokers.

- Players sit in a circle with an open space in the middle.

- A dealer shuffles the cards and deals them to the players until none are left.

- Players cannot look at their cards and must keep their hands face down.

- The exception to this rule is looking at the bottom card at the beginning of the game.

- The player with the highest-value bottom card goes first. Aces are high.

- If two or more players tie for highest-value bottom card, those players look at their next bottom cards. This continues until one person has the highest-value card.

- Play goes clockwise.

- The players play by putting the top card of their hands face-up in the center of the circle, forming a pile of cards.

Slaps

- Under certain circumstances, the pile can be slapped. Slapping consists of putting one's (human) hand on the pile.

- The player that slaps the pile first receives all the cards in the pile. This is called "winning" the pile.

- The player that wins the pile takes the entire pile and, without rearranging it, puts it face-down on the bottom of his hand. That player then puts down a card to start the next pile.

- Players may pick up the pile in order to straighten the cards or to check their values. This does not count as slapping them.^

- If two consecutive cards on the pile have the same face value (i.e. seven seven, Queen Queen), it is known as a "double".

- Two consecutive cards of the same suit do not form a double (i.e. club club).

- Doubles can be slapped.

- If two cards are of the same value but there is a different card between them (i.e. three five three, six Jack six), it is known as a "sandwich".

- Sandwiches can also be slapped.

- Doubles and sandwiches are the only card combinations where the pile can be slapped.

- Once a double or sandwich is covered by another card (that does NOT make it another double or sandwich), it can no longer be slapped.

- If a player slaps the pile when it cannot be slapped, it is called a "misslap".

- If a player misslaps and he still have cards, he must take the top three cards of his hand and place them face-up on the bottom of the pile. This is called "burning" cards.

- Cards that are placed in the pile as a result of burning cannot be slapped, even if their inclusion creates a double or sandwich.

^ My high school displayed surprisingly good sportsmanship and did not abuse this rule. If players abuse the rule (i.e. try to cover up a misslap to avoid a penalty), it can be suspended.

Face Cards

- If a player puts down a face card, then the next player has to put down a certain number of cards consecutively. The number of cards is based on the value of the face card.

- For a Jack, the next player puts down one card.

- For a Queen, the next player puts down two cards.

- For a King, the next player puts down three cards.

- For an Ace, the next player puts down four cards.

- For a Joker, the next player puts down five cards.

- If the card-laying player puts down another face card at any point, he stops putting down cards and the next player begins putting down cards.

- Slapping on any double or sandwich (i.e. King King, Ace nine Ace) stops the card-laying process.

- Producing a sandwich or double in itself is not enough; someone must slap it.

- If a player lays down the appropriate number of cards without producing a slap or another face card, the player that laid down the last face card wins the pile.

- As with slaps, the pile goes face down on the bottom of the winner's hand without being rearranged.

The Course and End of the Game

- Getting a slap and winning a pile with a face card are the only circumstances under which a player can win the pile.

- The pile is considered finished when someone wins it.

- If a player puts down a card out of turn, regardless of the circumstances, the player must burn that card.

- If a player loses all of his cards, that player is out.

- If a player decides to resign, all of his cards are burned. Cards cannot be gifted to other players.

- The game ends when, by the finish of any given pile, one player has all the cards in his hand.

- The player with all the cards is the winner.

Special Rules

- Finishing Out:

- If all the players except one have run out of cards, but the pile is not yet finished, the remaining player must continue putting down cards until someone either gets a slap or the remaining player wins the pile with a face card. This is known as finishing out the pile.

- If another player gets the slap, the game continues as normal.

- In the unusual event that the last player puts down all of his cards and the pile is still not finished, nobody wins.

- Slapping In^:

- Players that are out can still slap the pile. This is known as slapping (back) in.

- If a player that is out misslaps the pile three times in a row, he is prohibited from slapping the pile again. The player thus cannot slap in for the rest of the game.

- If a player slaps in and loses all of his cards again, the three-misslap limit is reset.

- People who were not players originally can also slap in.

- Ties:

- If two or more players slap the pile at the same time, the player whose hand covers the largest part of the pile wins the pile.

- If the players' fingers are intertwined, or if for some other reason the winner cannot be clearly determined, play continues as if no slap occurred. None of the players burn any cards.

- The "Failure" Rule:

- If a player fails to produce a slap or a face card on a Joker, he must burn an extra card for being that much of a failure.

- This rule does not apply if the last card creates a slap, regardless of who gets the slap.

- The "Five-Second" Rule^^:

- If a player has legitimately won a pile, whether by slapping or with a face card, that player has five seconds to pick up the pile and begin to put it in his hand. After five seconds, anyone is allowed to take the pile.

- This rules does not apply if the winner of the pile has all of the cards, i.e. the pile ends the game.

^ This rule can be suspended at any point for purposes of time. Once suspended, it is usually not reinstated until the next game. At my high school the rule was not applied selectively--anyone at all was allowed to slap in, even if the group didn't like or want to play with the person who wanted to slap in.

^^ This rule was rarely invoked and often outright banned due to its potential for abuse and controversy. Its original purpose was to try to prevent players from stalling or slowing down the pace of the game, i.e. pausing to send text messages after winning a pile. The rule is recorded here merely for the sake of completeness.

Obsolete Rules

- The "Joker Slap" Rule:

- For a short time a rule was in place where if someone successfully slapped a sandwich with the two Jokers (i.e. Joker seven Joker), the other players would each burn a card in tribute because the pile winner was able to get such an unusual slap.

- This rule no longer applied once another card was placed on the Joker sandwich, even if it formed another sandwich (i.e. Joker four Joker four).

- Resignation:

- In my junior year, if a player resigned, he was not allowed to slap back in for the rest of that game.

- The "Animal House" Rule:

- When a player won a slap, for any consecutive slap that he won, he was allowed to say "Thank you sir, may I have another?" This privilege was revoked as soon as the player lost a slap.

- The "Double-Burn" Rule:

- In early games, when someone played a card out of turn, he was required to burn the card he tried to play plus another card.

Miscellaneous Terminology

- "Fluff":

- A series of number cards, specifically a series in which there are no slaps.

- "Bleeding out":

- Losing a game almost entirely because of face cards as opposed to missing slaps.

- "Counting":

- Remembering a slap in one's own hand or someone else's hand. Counting is NOT considered cheating.

- "Hovering":

- Keeping one's hand very close to the pile in anticipation of a known slap. Hovering is considered cheating.

- "Slap-happy":

- Misslapping multiple times in a short period of time.

- "Triumphant Misslap"^:

- This occurs when a player wins a pile with a face card but mistakenly puts down his next card anyway, the card produces a slap, and the winner instinctively slaps it, triumphantly proclaiming that he "got" the slap. Burning three cards is technically necessary but is often overlooked due to the resulting fits of laughter.

^ A friend of mine was so prone to doing this that the act eventually received its own name, and we teased her endlessly about it. I later learned that she was only playing ERS because she wanted to flirt with me.

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ERS has many local variations and special rules.

Here are a few I'm aware of.

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[Last updated: 2021-11-02]