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A boring place

A small place,

little to do

little to see

What there is to see

it's not for me

no skill to explore

no tool to use

But none of that matters

not when I'm

shaky,

heavy, light

far,

locked up, afraid

A world inside my head,

slow, scared

comfortable there

A world outside,

fast, blunt,

daring where

quick to judge

quick to look

quick to speak

quick

I'm not what they want me to be

what I want me to be

I'm rushing just to stumble

and fall and

not fully express

I say a portion of my mind

to then be misunderstood

I miss what they say

what they say

what they say

I know what they say

what I say

what I say

Their look

I'm stumbling

stumbling over my words

over their look

over my thought

It continues,

the silence

I work it out

how did I sound?

I hope my tone was well

my voice

I hold no control