💾 Archived View for clemat.is › saccophore › library › ezines › textfiles › ezines › LDT › ldt036.tx… captured on 2021-12-04 at 18:04:22.
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88 88 88 88' `88 88' `88 88ooood8 88 http://ldt.aguk.co.uk
88 88. .88 88 88 88 88 88. ... 88 ldt@hushmail.com
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#036 - [ ill ]
[ enix ]
Ok, before we begin... the following text has nothing to offer to you.
You will not learn anything from it, benefit from it, nor will it better
of worse your life, and it doesn't give you a political view of some vital
question about life and anything beyond and will certainly not answer one.
You have probably read something like this before, maybe even wrote the same
lines as I'm thinking of and been in the same situation. It isn't special
and it will blow over. Most likely you will find it boring and ask yourself
why you are still reading this mindless piece of crap. You will probably not
fully understand what I'm talking about maybe even disagree with me. Doesn't
matter.
I can guarantee you that we will meet at the end of the text and I'll say
something stupid like: "told you so" or maybe even a "ha-ha!" since I am
the only one who is getting better from it.
May I ask you the question why you are still reading this?
Well, I guess I don't have to ask you since I already know the answer.
Humans are triggered to explore the unknown, especially when somebody is
telling you not to, can't blame you. I guess I'd still be reading too,
the past 30 seconds of time were a waste of time anyway.
Ok, I'm fucking up everything at the moment. I guess I wrote this intro
to protect myself from finally writing it down. I hoped I was a better
person, I guess I can change but it will take time. Got a letter they
are going to fire me, and I'm not doing to well at the moment in
participating with the social structures my university requires.
Yes, I lack the interest and I don't give a fuck, by the way, can I say
fuck on television? Yes dear, you are in Holland and you can do everything
here which is a good thing.
Of course this is not the first time I had a lack of interest for things.
I have a history. And it's not that I'm a stupid spoiled little brad.
I've done most of the things on my own and I even know the solution for this
I just had to find a way to express myself. I've past the age that I want
to fight the system or something like that, because the system can bring you
good. I know because I've found ways to use it by which I feel happy.
I just have to meet the right people to continue with. Don't know why;
note that this is not a cry for help as I told you before you shouldn't
even be reading this.
I feel like crap at the moment and that is because I'm getting ill
and don't wear a jacket when I go outside. And I'm getting a little bit
pissed off for the reason they want to fire me... we had this little talk
about how the organisation has changed in the past year and that they
don't have that much work for me at the moment next to writing some lousy
documentation and testing their crapy software code. They didn't have the
nerve to fire me straight away, or explain it in a decent way. They just
waited for me to make a "mistake" And of course I did. I didn't show up on
friday. I worked on saturday for once, no, sorry twice. Big deal. wasn't a
problem in the past shouldn't be now. And they write me a LETTER! damn.
A LETTER! WTF...
Now, where was I. History I guess? Well history has proven quite good and
I've always managed in some way so it will turn out of the good as it always
does. I'll just pick up, have a drink with my friends in the weekend and laugh
at this in the morning, which was the first intention to write this text anyway.
Ha-ha!
greetings and maybe till next time when I'm doing better.
enix
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Long Dark Tunnel 2001. - http://ldt.aguk.co.uk - ldt@hushmail.com
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