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Chapter 5:
THE NET PROFITS CATALOG
Welcome, Netroamers! We've got lots of new items this
year, including the Mark V cyberdeck from Hack & Decker
International and several new programs from the Legion of
Toon.
For first-time customers, we offer easy payment plans to
fit any budget. You don't have a job? We don't care! You
have bad credit? We don't care! You don't expect to pay us?
_Then we care!_ For further information on our credit
program, call our offices and ask for Rocco.
CYBERDECKS
Our line of cyberdecks is second to none! This year,
Net Profits signed an exclusive contract with Hack & Decker
International for distribution of their hot new Mark V
"Panther," the most powerful cyberdeck available to private
citizens! We also carry a full line of inexpensive decks for
home or office use. NOTE: Modifying cyberdecks or using them
for criminal activity is punishable by fines, imprisonment,
behavior modication and long, boring lectures on Good
Citizenship.
Mark I "Hawk"
This deck is perfect for the beginner. It has two
chipdips and a speed factor of 2. It has a comfortable pinky
slot and weighs less than 3 lbs. Cost is $200.
Mark II "Mustang"
With three chipdips and a speed factor of 3, this is a
good all-around deck for home use. Includes "phone home"
circuitry that lets you communicate with Realspace from
Cyberspace via your home comlink. Cost is $400.
Mark III "Tiger"
This is our biggest selling model! Look at these
features and you'll see why: four chipdips, a speed factor of
3, _two_ pinky slots, phone home circuitry and a special
timer chip that can be set to shut off the deck at a
predetermined time! Now on sale for only $700!
Mark IV "Rhino"
All of the features of the Mark III, but with _six_
chipdips instead of four and the option of speaking to
Realspace directly through your own voice instead of
comlinks! Cost: $900.
Mark V "Panther"
The new heavy hitter in the world of cyberdecks! Just
look at these fantastic features: speed factor of 4, _nine_
chipdips, _three_ pinky slots, _anti-Mindfry circuitry_ (good
versus attack rolls of 4 or less), direct voicelink with
Realspace, timer chip and a free _Dungeons and Toons_
worldgram! All for a one-time special price of $1,500!
Order _now_ to reserve yours!
PROGRAMS FOR ALL OCCASIONS!
Net Profits is proud to offer a complete line of Program
Chips from NeuroSoft Technologies. These chips come with a
full one-year, money-back warranty against defects when used
for _lawful purposes only!_
Each program comes on a seperate chip which takes up one
chipdip on your cyberdeck. So if you've got a Panther
cyberdeck, you can slot nine different programs at once...
but if you've got a Hawk, you can only use two.
WORLDGRAMS
The following popular worldgrams are all fully tested at
the factory to insure the minimum amount of anomolies.
_Warning: Tampering with worldgrams can lead to anomolies,
temporal paradoxes, mental disorders and possible Zeroing
Out. It also voids the warranty._ Cost: $50 each.
Dungeons and Toons
This is our number one seller. An exciting medieval
fantasy world complete with terrifying monsters and mighty
magic! Armor, weapon and magic Shtick programs are
recommended and available seperately.
Supertoon
A big favorite with young deckers! Superpowers make
programming fast and easy! See our large selection of powers
under "Shtickgrams".
Star Toon
Explore interstellar space from your own cyberdeck!
This chip is now sold with a four-passenger scoutship
gadgetgram at _no extra cost!_
Cream Pies and Private Eyes
Investigate your very own cases like Magnut, P.I. and
Phillip DaTanc. Be a private dick in the late 30's. See our
"Buddygrams" for partners!
WEAPONGRAMS
Our weapongrams are now available in _variable_ mode.
meaning that you can change them from one form to another!
Get them now at the low price of $75 each!
Low-Tech Weapons
Just the ticket for creating pre-gunpwder weapons, like
rocks, spears and swords. One program does it all!
High-Tech Weapons
Everything from a blunderbuss to a bazooka is right at
your fingertips with this chip.
Ultra-Tech Weapons
If you need a Plasma Cannon or a Light Saber, this chip
will do the job.
ARMORGRAMS
Armorgrams are sold according to the number of Hit
Points they add to the wearer. The armor will be whatever
armor is appropriate to the worldgram being used. Cost: $20
per Hit Point.
SHTICKGRAMS
Net Profits carries the largest selection of Shtickgrams
in the world! We guarantee your complete satisfaction or
your money back. Cost: $400 per Shtick chip at level 6; $200
for each point above 6. Choose from the list of Shticks, p.
00. (Animators: Since these Shticks work only in cyberspace,
they do _not_ cost character points.)
BOOSTERGRAMS
These very popular programs are now on sale for the low
price of $75 for the first bonus point for individual skills
and $400 for the first attribute bonus point. Prices double
for the second point, quadruple for the third, and so on.
(Example: Dixie Scatline wants to buy Fire Gun +2. It
costs $75 for the first point and $150 for the second point,
for a grand total of $225.)
BOGGLEGRAMS
A very useful chip, especially when you need to slow
down a security program! Bogglegrams cost $50 each and
Maximum Bogglegrams cost $150 each. These programs are
variable and can resemble anything from a cream pie to a joy
buzzer or a bottle of seltzer! Can be used over and over.
CREATUREGRAMS
Great for security programming, these are the well known
"Vari-Beast" chips that let you create any creature with Hit
Points and damage points at or below the program's maximum.
Cost: $10 per Hit Point and $10 per damage point.
BUDDYGRAMS
Why roam the Net alone when you can take a buddy along?
Our Buddygrams have a Smarts of 4, the highest legal level!
They can be programmed to do up to a dozen simple tasks and
have 10 Hit Points. Cost: $500 each.
Can't afford top-of-the-line? No problem! Talk to our
Construct-A-Buddy (tm) programmers and they will custom make
a Buddygram for you! Cost is $100 per point of Smarts up to
4, and $10 per Hit Point up to 12.
One of our most popular Buddygrams from Construct-A-
Buddy is the Friendly Puppy (tm) Buddygram! Man's best
friend is now your Buddy too! With a Smarts of 1 and 5 Hit
points, it can fetch, roll over, speak, and lick (with it's
built-in Bogglegram, this causes the target to sit in agony
while you can go about your business!). A steal at $200.
GADGETGRAMS
This section was so large, we had to give it a
_separate_ text file! Hundreds of useful items are listed
and all of them are on sale! Note: Animators can decide what
gadgets to let the Netroamers have in cyberspace, and should
price them according to their usefulness.
TRAPGRAMS
One of the best security measures money can buy! We
sell thousands of them every week. Just the thing for
dealing with subversive Toonpunks! Cost: $150 each.
IMPLANTS
Five years ago, Net Profits began offering high-quality
cyberware implants to the general public. Today, we are one
of the largest implant dealers in the world. All of our
implants come with free installation and a one-year
guarantee. Below are just a few of our more popular
implants.
ARMORSKIN
Don't worry about getting knocked down by a single punch
-- wear Armorskin from Net Profits! This lightweight armor
can really take a beating and still look _exactly_ like your
normal skin! Price includes custom tailoring. A steal at
$3,500.
Note: Armorskin adds 25 Hit Points to your character's
total. The armor is not affected by magnets.
BUILT-IN CYBERDECK
When we introduced this product last spring, the demand
was so high that we completely sold out of them in _two
weeks!_ Now they're back and the demand is sure to be even
higher! Available in any model deck, with chipdips placed
either in your chest, arm, forehead or neck. A huge seller
at $4,000 each, plus the basic cost of your deck.
Note: A Built-In Cyberdeck allows you to plug into the
Net without using a pinky plug _or_ an external deck. You
only need to be within 30 feet of a comline, computer, hair-
dryer or any other plugged-in device. You can have extra
chipdips installed for $200 each. While you are in
cyberspace, your physical body will just sit still with its
eyes shut. If an implanted deck is _damaged_, the Animator
should be very creative with the problems it causes.
CYBERSENSES
Notice EVERYTHING around you! Get that cybernetic edge
for detectives, or become really good at Where's Waldo! This
cybernetic overhaul is expensive, but you can make all your
See/Hear/Smell rolls at +5! Cost: $2,000.
FINGERTOOLS
Tired of not having the right tool for the job? We were
too, so we had the people at Digit Tech design these handy
electric fingertools for us. Your choice of drill,
screwdriver, sander, saw, cutting/welding torch, stapler or
hot glue gun. Cost: $400.
INSTANT WINGS
You can fly! When not in use, these wings fold neatly
into hidden slots on your back, but when you want, they pop
out into a beautiful set of wings. You can jump into the air
and (if you make your roll) stay there. If you roll your
shtick level or less, you can fly to any destination you want
at Speed 5. The Animator determines how far your character
can fly. No chartacter can fly to Outer Space. If the roll
fails, you plummet to earth, taking damage according to how
far you fell (usually one die, or two dice for a really long
fall).
Each time you try to change direction or do something
while flying (like taking something out of your Back Pocket,
or dropping a rock), make another shtick roll. If this
succeeds, there's no problem. If it fails, you remain aloft,
but the action fails. You head in the wrong direction; your
pockets empty themselves onto the ground; the weight of the
rock drags you to earth; and so on.
Cost: $2,000
LASER EYES
Why carry around a laser pistol around when you can just
shoot laser beams FROM YOUR EYES! SeeYa Technologies ("We
see the future") lets you with Laser Eyes! The beams do 1d+1
damage per turn. They will NOT melt a mirror (don't ask US
why, they just WON'T). Instead, they bounce off in whatever
direction the Animator decides. The beams have a range of 60
feet. Sold singly or in pairs for just $750 each!
MICRO EYES
From those wonders at SeeYa Technologies comes Micro
Eyes! Now you can get a really good look at really small
things! Depending upon how powerful the Animator says it is,
these implants might let you see things as small as atoms! A
steal at only $200 each.
NIGHT EYES
Tired of stumbling in the dark? Like to go night
fishing, but keep stabbing yourself with hooks? Fret no more
with SeeYa Technologies' Night Eyes! See in the dark as if
it were daylight! Only $250 each.
PINKY PLUG
Lets you connect to a cyberdeck and enter the Net. Each
character needs only one -- a cyberdeck with multiple plugs
can be used by several Netroamers. May be istalled on a
finger, or anyplace else funny. Cost: $100.
SUCTION CUP HANDS AND FEET
Can you imagine running UP the side of a building? Our
Suction Cup Hands And Feet will let you do just that! If
you're falling, these devices will let you grab hold of any
vertical surface you can reach and stop your fall. If a
surface is wet, to remain clinging you must make a Shtick
roll every 60 feet you move. If it's oily or greased, you
need to roll every 30 feet. They're great for getting to
those hard-to-reach burnt-out light bulbs! Any attack that
does MORE than 6 points of damage will knock you off. If you
are trying to carry a heavy weight while clinging, you have a
chance of losing your grip on a roll of 4 or less. Sold only
in sets of two hands and two feet. Priced right at $900.
TELESCOPE EYES
SeeYa has done it again! With Telescope Eyes, you can
see things for miles away! To see a long way in the DARK,
you'll need our Night Eyes, too! Sold singly or in pairs for
$300 each.
X-RAY EYES
Now YOU can see through solid objects! Our top-of-the-
line cyberware eyes can switch from normal to X-Ray Vision in
a flash! See up to 60 feet unobstructed! Buy one or a pair
at our new low price of $600 each. Sorry, they can't see
through lead.
VEHICLES
CARS
(Rodder <i.e. Rigger> conversion 150% cost - Both Rodder AND
stock 200% cost)
Car | Speed | Passengers | Hit Points | Cost
------------------------------------------------------------
Small | 40 ft. | 1 | 6 | $ 500
Medium | 60 ft. | 2 | 10 | $1000
Large | 80 ft. | 3 | 14 | $2000
Luxury | 100 ft.| 4 | 18 | $4000
Motorcycle | Speed | Passengers | Hit Points | Cost
------------------------------------------------------------
Dirt Bike | 80 ft. | 1 | 6 | $ 500
Big Bike | 60 ft. | 2 | 12 | $1000
HIGH-JUMP SNEAKERS
Get the jump on the competition with these sneakers from
Reeverse. Every leap is followed by a cushioning jet of air,
so you land as light as a feather! You can leap 120 feet in
a single bound! You can only leap in a straight line, but
you can turn and leap as soon as you land (on your next
turn). If anything happens to you while leaping, you must
make your Drive Vehicle roll to land without being hurt. If
you land on anybody or anything other than the ground, the
Animator decides how much damage you did to them. Available
in black, white, red, blue, and gray at only $300 per pair.
ROCKETPACK
Fly with the eagles, thanks to your Net Profits
Rocketpack from Secord AviTech! These new, improved
rocketpacks have a much greater speed and range than the
original version. In addition, the problem of accidental
explosion has been _completely_ eliminated! So strap on your
rocketpack and _really_ get on the fast track! Cost: $1,200.
Note: Treat as Instant Wings, but a Drive Vehicle roll
must be made _every turn_. A failure can mean a runaway
pack, a crash, an explosion or all three, as well as anything
else the Animator likes.
SPEEDY SNEAKERS
Another breakthrough for Reeverse, you never have to be
caught in traffic jams again! When you run, add 100 feet per
turn to your Speed score. You have to roll against your
Drive Vehicle skill every turn you run. Available in black,
white, red, chrome, and new flourescent pink! Only $500 per
pair!
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS
CHAMELEON CLOTHES
Just the ticket for watching people without letting THEM
watch YOU! These clothes let you blend into ANY background.
If you're standing in front of a brick wall, you'll be
colored like a brick wall. Stand in front of a tree and
you'll be colored like bark. As you move from one place to
another, your coloring changes (unless the Animator decides
otherwise). When you wear these, all other PCs and NPCs must
make any skill roll that affects you, like Fight,
See/Hear/Smell, or other skills at -6. Hide/Spot Hidden
rolls are made at -3. Failed Chameleon rolls could give
others a BONUS to spot you! Comes in many popular styles for
both men and women. Cost: $500.
HOLOPROJECTOR
Use this handy item to project virtually any image you
choose in 3-D. Why bother with huse plants, paintings or
even windows, when a holoprjector can simulate them all? Now
on sale for only $400 each.
Note: Holoprojectors create a very realistic _non-
moving_ illusion. A See/Hear/Smell roll at -1 or an attempt
to touch the image will reveal that it's not real.
Holoprojectors have a range of 30 feet.
OMNIMASK
Want to see what your factory workers _really_ think of
you? Just slip on an Omnimask and a pair of overalls and you
can mingle among them unnoticed! Works great for industrial
espionage, too! Only $250 per mask!
Note: An Omnimask can look like anyone you choose. It
can also create entirely _new_ faces. The mask will retain
the face you want for 10 turns and then it will go blank
unless you reprogram it. This mask _only_ changes the
wearer's face and head! It has no effect on the body, so if
you are a mouse with a lions head, others will eventually
notice.
ROBOTIC WATCHDOG
Protect your home and family _and_ have a loyal friend
that doesn't _eat, shed, chew things, dig holes or perform
other canine acts!_ Available in all breeds and sale priced
at $1,000.
Note: This dog acts just like a real dog, except that it
will always be loyal to you, takes half damage from energy
attacks, has 30 Hit Points, and does 1d damage with its bite.
Other than that, it's a dog.
WEAPONS
GENERO PISTOL
Your standard, run-of-the-mill pistol. It does 1d and
costs $25.
GENERO RIFLE
Again, your standard rifle. It does 1d+3 and costs $50.
BOGGLE BEAM
This gun causes Boggling with every hit, along with the
1d damage. Boggling occurs on a roll of 5 or less. Cost:
$200 (plus $100 per level of Shtick). For double the price,
you can do Maximum Boggling!
COLD RAY
Not only does this do the normal 1d of damage, but two
special effects also happen - One, when a target Falls Down,
he is encased in a block of ice! Two, the temperature in the
immediate area drops considerably (snow starts falling,
penguins ski by, etc.) for 1 turn. Cost: $600.
DISCOMBOBULATING GRENADES
When one of these grenades explodes, every living thing
within 50 feet becomes disoriented and confused. _Any_
action taken by a discombobulated character is at -2. The
effects of this weapon last 3 turns. Cost: $100 each.
JOY BUZZER GLOVES
These heavy leather gloves have small joy buzzers built
into the backs of the knuckles, so that every time you puch
someone, you get a chance to boggle them as well! Boggling
will occur on a roll of 5 or less on your Fight roll. Cost:
$150.
LASER PISTOL
The old stand-by, it does the standard 1d, but it's
great fun with mirrors! Cost: $100.
MOLASSES GUN
A gun that fires extra-thick, extra-sticky molasses. It
has a 30-foot range and does 2 points of damage. Characters
covered in molasses will lose 2 from their Speed and make all
Zip and Muscle rolls at -2. This effect lasts until the
molasses is washed off. Cost: $300.
SMART GUN
This gun fires a laser beam that does 1d+2 damage. It
gets its ame because it has a little robot brain with a
Smarts of 4, and can answer simple questions. It also gives
a +2 to the user's Fire Gun roll. Cost: $300.
NOT-SO-SMART GUN
The same as a Smart Gun, but it only has a Smarts of 1,
and gives only a +1 to the Fire Gun roll. Cost: $200.
ARMOR
Name | Hit Points Added | Cost
-------------------------------------------
Cardboard | 0 | Free
Leather Jacket | 2 | $150
Kevlar Vest | 5 | $500
Steel Helmet | 1 | $100
Frack Jacket | 10 | $1000
Armor Jacket | 12 | $1500
Armored Undies | 25 | $2500