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                             Stuck In Traffic
            "Current Events, Cultural Phenomena, True Stories"
                        Issue #25 - August, 1997
                      
                    

    Contents:
    
    Gun Moll
    Sarah Ovenall learns how to shoot a gun with style and grace. 
    
    The Beautiful Golden Leaf 
    Is there a place for tobacco in our culture? How could there 
    not be? 
    
    Powers' Index
    A couple of interesting statistics to chew on. 
    
    Mars Doesn't Attack! 
    Do you feel guilty about not being excited over the Mars Path 
    Finder mission? Don't. Here's why it really is boring. 



    ==================================== 
                              True Story                          
    Gun Moll                            
                        by Sarah Ovenall                    
                        
    Eclectic is a good goal.  At least, that's my opinion.  So I 
    jumped at the chance to learn how to use a handgun.  
      
    For years I've harbored a low-level desire to try target shooting.  
    Hobbies that fall within the feminine sphere -- cooking, quilting, 
    that sort of thing -- seem to come naturally to me.  But I can't 
    throw a football, or change the oil in my car (even after taking a 
    class in basic car maintenance), or build a bookshelf, or any of 
    those "manly" pursuits.  It felt like a gap in my range of 
    experience.  
      
    One beastly hot Sunday morning in early July, my friend Candi and 
    I went out with Mark, a local firearm enthusiast (read: gun nut) 
    to his firing range.  The range was out in Alamance County, North 
    Carolina, so we enjoyed the trip in Mark's tank of a car playing 
    "guess the music" (Bjork, Fear, the Spanic Boys, and Romeo Void), 
    then we got into the proper frame of mind with the CRASH 
    soundtrack for most of the trip.  
                                           
    Once we got to the firing range, Candi and I had a basic gun 
    safety lesson, then it was time for the real thing.  Mark had 
    brought an assortment of firearms for our perusal: a .22 revolver, 
    a .22 semiautomatic Smith & Wesson, a tiny 9 mm Colt, a 9 mm 
    Glock, and a 12 gauge shotgun.  He let us try each one, starting 
    with the easiest (the revolver) and working our way up to the most 
    difficult (the shotgun).  
      
    I've always had terrible aim.  I can't bowl.  I suck at darts.  I 
    was always the last one picked in sports.  I tried archery once, 
    and was abysmal.  Anything that required hand-eye coordination; 
    you name it, I'm bad at it.  So I naturally assumed I'd be equally 
    bad at target shooting.  I had visions of not being able to hit 
    the target at all, of being laughed off the range, of fleeing in 
    humiliation and saying to myself, "Well, at least now I know what 
    it's like, so I don't have to do it again." 
      
    But it wasn't like that at all.  It was a lot of fun.  Almost too 
    much fun.  The shotgun was way too big for me, and the Colt had 
    such a stiff trigger than I literally could not pull it.  The 
    Glock was good, though it had enough recoil that it was more 
    difficult to aim.  The two .22s, the revolver and especially the 
    semiautomatic, felt just great.  
      
    I had this nagging feeling that I ought to be repulsed by the very 
    sight of a firearm.  I ought to be sickened by the feel of it in 
    my hand.  I ought to be appalled by the sound of gunfire.  But I 
    wasn't.  Whatever pacifist sensibilities I possess failed to 
    manifest themselves.  I felt no aversion to pulling the trigger.  
    In fact, it felt good.  
                                           
    And I was good at it, if I may allow myself a moment's immodesty.  
    For a beginner, of course.  But even so, there's something 
    immensely satisfying about firing off a round, rapid-fire, and 
    hitting the mark with every one.  I felt that I could see a point 
    of focus where everything extraneous drops away, where there's 
    nothing left but the sights, the target and the trigger.  I wasn't 
    there, of course.  Not even close to that level of concentration.  
    Just enough to know that it exists.  
      
    It was scary too.  There were moments (especially when the 
    magazine clicked into place) that I would think to myself, "I'm 
    holding a loaded gun.  I could kill somebody if I screwed up." 
      
    I need the chance to practice a few more times.  To find out if 
    the thrill was in the novelty, or if this really is for me.  But I 
    could see myself doing this, as a serious hobby.  
      
    A few hours on the firing range hasn't left me a gun-toting freak.  
    I'm not planning to hold up any liquor stores anytime soon, or 
    move to Michigan and build myself a bunker.  What it has left me 
    with: A sunburn across the left side of my face.  Two broken 
    fingernails.  A new nickname (Hopalong).  Two targets to hang on 
    my wall.  And the certainty that I'll be back there soon.  
    
    About the Author:                                         
    Durham gun moll Sarah Ovenall drives an art car, designs Tarot 
    decks, and views hair color as an avant garde art form.  Her 
    secret life is a boring Web designer preoccupied with wallpaper 
    and dog ownership.  Her self-indulgent tendencies can be viewed 
    at: http://www.netenterprises.com/staff/sarah/ 
        
    ==================================== 
                      Cultural Phenomena
    The Beautiful Golden  Leaf          
    
    I've always had a fascination with the mathematical field of 
    fractal geometry, which deals with the notion that sometimes a 
    thing looks more or less the same no matter how close you get to 
    it or how far away you get from it.  If you look at a cloud 
    without any surrounding context, it's very difficult to tell how 
    close or far away you are from it because the big billowing clouds 
    of vapor bend and curl the same way that small ones do.  
      
    The math is way beyond my capability to grasp, but the idea is 
    very powerful and appealing.  No field of mathematics is useful 
    unless it helps describe something in the real world, and so with 
    fractal geometry.  And that's the lure.  Can I learn something 
    about the world just looking around me?  As I look out the window 
    of my car while driving to work, can I learn lessons about the 
    social forces shaping the country?  Maybe so, maybe not.  But 
    while driving to work last week I had a tremendous wave of 
    recognition flow over me as I passed newly planted fields of 
    tobacco.  
       
    North Carolina is a beautiful state, with both a keen sense of 
    history and an optimistic eye toward the opportunities of the 
    future; and I count myself lucky to live here.  I live in a 
    suburban community called Cary, located just outside of the 
    capital city of Raleigh.  Cary is often criticized for being too 
    dull and plain.  Heck, I feel that way sometimes too.  Sometimes 
    it seems like the Cary Town Council has passed a law requiring 
    that every house be painted tan and that every house have exactly 
    seven shrubs and a dogwood tree in the front yard.  Redbud trees 
    or even an oak tree if you're feeling in a wild mood.  Everything 
    closes at 10:00 at night.  I was once stopped by a Cary police 
    officer for returning a library book at the drive by book drop 
    because I was there suspiciously late at night.  On the other 
    hand, Cary is safe, with an enviably low crime rate.  The schools 
    are good.  The roads are well kept.  The water is clean and cheap.  
    Generally speaking, it's a pleasant place to live.  The people 
    here still have a good natured friendly attitude toward each 
    other.  Even the crustiest Northerners that move to the area 
    mellow out considerably after a couple of years.  It's an 
    extremely conservative town where deviations from the norm are 
    noted with raised eyebrows, but it's also conservative in a good 
    way.  
      
    I work for a computer company in "The Research Triangle," which is 
    area situated in the middle of a triangle formed by Raleigh, 
    Durham, and Chapel Hill where many companies in high tech 
    industries like computers and pharmaceuticals have major 
    development centers.  Software companies large and small are 
    cranking out everything from next season's video games to the next 
    generation of the Internet.  Pharmaceutical giants are 
    methodically testing new treatments for just about any ailment you 
    can name, Alzheimer disease, AIDS, high Cholesterol, Sickle Cell 
    Anemia, etc.  etc.  The area is also one of the countries leading 
    centers of Medical research with the renowned Duke Medical Center, 
    University of North Carolina Medical Center.  Even industries that 
    you wouldn't normally think of needing big research and 
    development efforts, the textile industry for example, have 
    facilities in "the Triangle." 
       
    So many people in this area wake up in the morning in their 
    suburban neighborhoods, bastions of safe, conservative living; 
    hallmarks of traditional living; and drive off to jobs in the 
    triangle to help build the future.  OK, maybe that's being more 
    than a tad melodramatic, but you get the idea.  And I couldn't 
    help but wonder if this little slice of Americana that I call home 
    isn't in some sense a bit of the American dream poking through to 
    reality.  Isn't this representative of some unspoken communal goal 
    that underlies everything we do?  How much can you look at this 
    lifestyle and see the rest of America?  
      
    Self centered and arrogant as they may be, these were the thoughts 
    on my mind when I noticed the fields of tobacco.  
                                             
    The Tobacco Experience:
                                             
    The drive from my house to my job passes by several large tobacco 
    fields cultivated by area farmers and I always enjoy noting the 
    progress of the year's tobacco crops as I drive by each morning.  
    If you've never had the good fortune of seeing a tobacco field, 
    then you will just have to take my word for it that tobacco is the 
    world's most beautiful crop when it's growing in the field.  
      
    You start with an empty field, totally plowed under so that all 
    you see is the rich, red Carolina clay, the same stuff they make 
    bricks and moonshine jugs out of, and plow it into rows of earth.  
    This usually takes a day or so.  Then the farmers plant the 
    tobacco seedlings into the rows of earth.  They have special 
    machines that they pull behind their tractors that take the 
    seedlings and plant them into the earth at just the right spacing.  
    Although as I understand it, usually someone has to walk behind 
    and give each seedling a little more detailed attention.  In any 
    event, for a few days, you see these huge fields of red/orange 
    clay with perfectly spaced green seedlings.  
      
    I couldn't tell you exactly when this occurs, but it seems to be 
    in the late spring, just as the weather is getting warm and you 
    can expect plenty of sunshine.  What I can tell you is that 
    tobacco grows incredibly fast.  In no time at all, you have chest 
    high tobacco plants filling the fields.  The red-orange landscape 
    is replaced by a lush, cooling green.  A tobacco plant stands up 
    very straight and precise, but it's all leaves.  Huge, lance 
    shaped leaves, one on top of another, almost like petals of a 
    flower, from the ground on up.  
      
    When the tobacco plants get to be about chest high, they sprout 
    stems of small white flowers at the top, a perfect accent to the 
    fields of green and the red-orange clay underneath.  They will 
    stay like this for a few weeks, then apparently the farmers cut 
    off the flowering parts.  I've never actually seen people doing 
    this, but it seems like they disappear overnight, just about the 
    time that I also see crews of migrant workers sweeping through the 
    fields.  
       
    Eventually, the leaves will start turning yellow.  For some reason 
    it's always the leaves at the bottom of the plant that turn first 
    followed by the ones above.  I don't know how a farmer knows when 
    it's time to harvest the tobacco, but at some point they deem it 
    the right time and more crews of migrant workers show up.  As far 
    as I can tell, harvesting tobacco must be done by hand because you 
    have to cut the tobacco plants near ground level.  You then haul 
    the entire tobacco plant away to the curing shed where it is 
    staked on long wooden poles and hung.  In the shed it will finish 
    turning color from green and yellow in to a rich, golden brown.  
    Then sometime in the fall, they farmers make huge piles of tobacco 
    in the backs of their trucks and they haul it off to the market.  
      
    Those of you who have never experienced it probably won't believe 
    me; but, even as a nonsmoker, I think the smell of cured tobacco 
    is wonderful.  The smell of tobacco defines "Good Earth." You 
    can't smell tobacco without thinking of nature and sun and plants 
    and the miracles of chlorophyll.  In downtown Durham, there are 
    still tobacco processing plants.  I believe they are Ligget-Myers 
    plants; and during certain times during the fall, the entire 
    downtown area is filled with the earthy smell of cured tobacco.  
    It's great.  Everyone should experience it at least once.  
                                           
    And while I was musing over the social implications of living in a 
    conservative town and working on the future I had this huge 
    feeling sweep over me that the tobacco had to be explained.  It 
    had to fit into the scheme of things.  If this was a slice of 
    Americana, the tobacco had to represent something.  It's just way 
    too big to ignore and way too beautiful to discount.  
                                             
    Tobacco is Key:
                                             
    At first glance, you might think that there's no place for 
    tobacco, even metaphorically, in Our Modern Lifestyle.  Barring 
    any future discoveries of a medicinal or industrial use of 
    tobacco, it's difficult to imagine that tobacco won't be stamped 
    out in our lifetime.  In a culture that won't tolerate body odor, 
    in a culture where cleanliness is next to godliness, in a culture 
    where everything has to be buckled in, strapped down, and locked 
    into place; where everything has to be inoculated, inspected, and 
    inventoried, where "sanitized for your protection" permeates our 
    being, it's difficult to imagine that tobacco will be tolerated.  
    "Tobacco is addictive and unhealthy," the conventional thinking 
    seems to go, "therefore it must be eradicated." 
      
    Certainly those that know how to play the media like an instrument 
    are thinking along those lines.  Over the past few months, how 
    many times have we heard a talking head pose the question, "What 
    should the nation's tobacco control policy be?" Note that the 
    question assumes that everyone is already agreed on the point that 
    tobacco should be controlled.  They would like you to believe that 
    the only remaining question is regarding the most effective means 
    of "controlling" tobacco.  
      
    The situation is further complicated by the fact that one of the 
    government's biggest welfare programs, Medicaid, is in serious 
    financial trouble.  Politicians and the spin control experts are 
    desperate for deep pockets to plunder for funds in order to hide 
    the fact that Medicaid is near insolvency.  They will do 
    everything in their power to avoid letting the public think that 
    the reason Medicaid is in trouble has anything to do with the 
    inefficiencies and bureaucracies of government programs.  They 
    will fight to the last to keep the public from thinking that maybe 
    this nation can help those in need without a Federal Program.  
    They will stop at nothing to prevent people from considering that 
    maybe, just maybe, the government's control of the health care 
    industry is responsible for spiraling health care costs.  To stop 
    these unthinkable thoughts, the government is working overtime to 
    convince the nation that it's tobacco related health problems that 
    are responsible for the Medicaid crisis and that therefore it's 
    morally acceptable to force the tobacco industry to keep the 
    Medicaid program afloat.  
      
    Insurance companies make their very living by studying long term 
    trends and using statistics to predict what's going to happen to 
    people and how often.  Then they base their premiums on those 
    predictions such that they can cover their future claims and still 
    make a profit.  If insurance companies can do it, there's no 
    reason that the government can't also do it.  If the Medicaid 
    program isn't financially solvent, then it's either because its 
    administrators failed to predict the long term trends or they 
    simply offered more to previous claimants than they could afford.  
    Either way, to blame the nation's Medicaid crisis on tobacco and 
    tobacco related illnesses, is to blame the symptom, not the 
    ailments.  The number of smokers in the United States has slowly 
    gone down over the past few decades, so if anything, there should 
    be a surplus in Medicaid because the number of smoking related 
    illnesses should also be going down.  
                                             
    But Everyone Dies Of Something:
                                             
    Just think, if the government could stop people from dying, they 
    could take all that Medicaid money and spend it on something else.  
    Silly as it sounds, that seems to be the rationale driving the 
    antismoking lobby and the government.  But no matter what happens 
    at the end of our life, our bodies are going to weaken and 
    eventually fail.  And because we are human, we will always fight 
    it.  We will always strive to live longer.  We will always want to 
    spend money on our health whether through preventive measures or 
    by medical treatment.  None of this is going to change if tobacco 
    is eliminated tomorrow.  The Medicaid crisis is not going to be 
    fixed if tobacco is eradicated from the planet, the only thing it 
    would do would be to rob many people of one of their pleasant 
    vices.  
       
    Because while smoking is generally considered unhealthy, while 
    smoking is generally considered addictive, it is nonetheless a 
    pleasant habit to have for most smokers.  It is often said that 
    every cigarette a man smokes shortens his life by 7 minutes.  And 
    so?  If a man chooses to give up seven minutes of his life in 
    exchange for sitting on his back porch and enjoying a good cigar 
    among friends, has he made a bad choice?  Maybe.  Is he being 
    short sighted?  Perhaps.  But isn't it his choice to make?  Who 
    would be so arrogant that they would try to run the man's life, 
    change is habits, and force him to do what's "best" for him.  
      
    As an ardent liberal, in the truest and best sense of the word, I 
    for one would never claim to have the right to second guess a 
    smoker's choices.  Certainly if I were asked my opinion of the 
    matter, I would recommend strongly against smoking.  But everyone 
    has the right to choose their own path.  Everyone has to find 
    their own way in the world.  Everyone has the right to choose 
    their own vices.  
       
    And if Medicaid can't keep up, then it should be abandoned and 
    replaced by private insurance.  Insurance companies certainly seem 
    to be able fulfill claims against their policies and still stay 
    solvent.  And if no one will insure the smokers, then that's their 
    worry.  That's the cost of their choice.  It's morally wrong to 
    start trying to rob people of their self-control and their 
    independence just to keep a bankrupt federal program afloat.  
      
    And as I drove down the road watching those beautiful fields of 
    tobacco growing lush and green under the hot Carolina sun, I 
    recognized that tobacco fits into the picture because it 
    represents the choices we make.  The rich earthy aroma of cured 
    tobacco reminds us that life is an experience, not an elaborate 
    game of avoiding risk factors.  
      
    Life is not entirely a game of building a safe home town to live 
    in.  Nor is life solely an endless march in to the future.  These 
    are important parts of life, but an equally important part of life 
    is choosing our indulgences along the way.  
      
    ==================================== 
                              True Story                          
    Powers' Index                       
    
    Number of miles from my house 
    in Cary, NC to  downtown Atlanta Georgia:             328                                 
      
    Number of McDonalds restaurants on the route:          31 
    
    Average number of miles between McDonald's  
    restaurants on the route:                           10.58                               
    
    ==================================== 
                          Current Events                      
    Mars Doesn't Attack!                
                                             
    In fact it just sits there.  
    
    If NASA's Path Finder mission to Mars is so great, why is it so 
    boring?  It's an extraordinary achievement of science.  You have 
    to successfully launch the vehicle from Earth and put it into 
    orbit.  Then you have to break it out Earth's orbit at just the 
    right time for it to pick up enough momentum to reach Mars.  And 
    all this has to be timed precisely so that the Path Finder craft 
    will intercept Mars and be caught in Mars' gravity.  Then the 
    vehicle has to descend through the Martian atmosphere, slow down 
    enough to not burn up and not destroy itself when it lands.  And 
    it has to land upright so that the onboard instrumentation can do 
    it's stuff.  
      
    But wait, there's more.  The Path Finder then has to roll down a 
    special ramp and navigate over Mars' rocky terrain so that it can 
    analyze the surrounding rocks.  The machinery that does the 
    analysis of the rocks has made the entire trip from earth and must 
    be stowed in such a way as to ensure that it won't get damage 
    either on take off or touch down.  And then it has to correctly 
    activate and go do it's thing.  
       
    And finally, the craft must maintain contact with Earth to receive 
    instructions and of course send back all the information that it's 
    there to collect.  Nothing would be more disappointing than to 
    successfully have sent the Path Finder all the way to Mars and 
    then not be able to hear what it's trying to tell us.  
      
    All this happened with remarkably few mishaps along the way.  Of 
    course a space exploration mission requires constant attention and 
    baby sitting.  I'm not trying to suggest that there weren't more 
    than a few sleepless nights at the control center.  But in terms 
    of all the major project milestones.  The Path Finder mission has 
    been remarkably trouble free.  There are some folks at NASA, 
    probably a few thousand folks actually, that deserve both a round 
    of applause and a raise.  Not to mention an extended vacation.  
      
    And yet the landing on Mars somehow didn't have the big payoff, in 
    terms of excitement, that you might have expected such a 
    remarkable achievement to have had.  Even the fact that the first 
    pictures came back from the landing site on Mars on the Fourth of 
    July couldn't raise the excitement level of the event.  Even the 
    fact that the landing site was named Sagan station, after the pop 
    guru of space exploration couldn't add to the excitement.  As NASA 
    scientists and project leaders held press conferences in front of 
    the entire world, they looked happy and excited.  But mostly they 
    looked tired.  You can't blame them of course.  They's been up for 
    hours and hours managing all those last minute details.  But 
    still, it didn't make for very good TV.  
      
    When the Path Finder landed on Mars, several NASA astronauts 
    fanned out among the media to answer interviews and give the 
    viewers a perspective.  CNN was lucky enough to have astronaut 
    Fred Story on the air who kept reminding the public that the Path 
    Finder mission "reminds us that the call is there".  In other 
    words, keep the funding up.  I'm sure Mr.  Story's words were 
    sincere.  But is his perfectly crafted sound bite contains the 
    explanation as to why the Path Finder mission is a bit lacking.  
      
    When one says, "the call is there," there's an implied assumption 
    that whatever it is that's doing the "calling" is calling a human.  
    A living, breathing, feeling human.  And perhaps the reason that 
    the Path Finder mission is so anti-climatic is that it wasn't a 
    manned mission.  
      
    In a way it's like instrumental rock music.  You can admire 
    instrumentals for their demonstration of skill and musicianship.  
    You can be dazzled by them.  But you can't listen to them forever.  
    And they aren't inspirational either.  They don't get your heart 
    pumping fast.  Instrumentals rarely, if ever generate adrenaline 
    rushes.  
      
    And so with the Path Finder mission.  It's the instrumental rock 
    album of space exploration.  It's great.  It's a marvel.  Now, 
    when are we going to see someone do something we can cheer about?  
      
    In terms of human drama, in terms of hanging on the edge of your 
    seat wondering what's going to happen next.  The crew of the Mir 
    Space station are much more interesting to follow in the news.  
    Who's going to make the critical repairs?  When will they attempt 
    them?  Will it work?  
      
    Now don't get me wrong.  I don't blame NASA.  I'm not one of those 
    disaffected space freaks that writes letters to my congressman 
    about how it's absolutely necessary to put man on Mars.  I can 
    accept that it just wasn't feasible to put man on Mars this on 
    this mission, both because of technical feasibility and money.  
       
    My big complain about the Path Finder mission is not that humans 
    weren't along for the ride.  My big complaint about the Path 
    Finder mission is that there is no sign of humanity in it.  
      
    Couldn't we have plunked an American flag into the sandy Martian 
    soil?  Isn't it traditional for people, American's especially, to 
    plant a flag on newly conquered wilderness?  To my knowledge, 
    there aren't even any American flags painted on the equipment.  At 
    least not any that are easily visible in the pictures that are 
    being sent back.  No doubt any display of patriotism in this 
    outstanding achievement would be deemed far to politically 
    incorrect.  
      
    Would it have been too much to ask for something other than pure 
    numbers to flow back from the Path Finder?  Something like, 
    "Greetings from Mars!  Wish you were here.  It's a bit chilly but 
    there's lots of room for building sand castles!  -- Love, Path 
    Finder" 
      
    But no.  We couldn't do anything the least bit symbolic on this 
    mission.  We couldn't do anything the least bit fun.  It's all 
    business the whole way.  
      
    The one human element in the Path Finder landing on Mars was the 
    fact that scientists started naming certain rocks that could be 
    seen.  There's "Barnacle Bill", "the Sofa", "Yogi" and "Scooby 
    Doo".  But lest we think that someone at NASA is having any fun 
    with these names, the NASA press releases and web pages were quick 
    to point out to us that "The names are used by the Pathfinder team 
    to help identify and keep track of the many rocks at the landing 
    site." 
      
    It's space exploration by committee.  
        
    ==================================== 
                  About Stuck In Traffic                    
                  
    Stuck In Traffic is a monthly magazine dedicated to evaluating 
    current events, examining cultural phenomena, and sharing true 
    stories.  
                                              
                                             
    Why "Stuck In Traffic"?  
        
    Because getting stuck in traffic is good for you.  It's an 
    opportunity to think, ponder, and reflect on all things, from the 
    personal to the global.  As Robert Pirsig wrote in _Zen and the 
    Art of Motorcycle Maintenance_, "Let's consider a reevaluation of 
    the situation in which we assume that the stuckness now occurring, 
    the zero of consciousness, isn't the worst of all possible 
    situations, but the best possible situation you could be in.  
    After all, it's exactly this stuckness that Zen Buddhists go to so 
    much trouble to induce...." 
                                             
    Submissions:
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    something on your mind or a personal story you'd like to share, 
    please do.  You don't have to be a great writer to be published 
    here, just sincere.  
                                             
    Contact Information:
    All queries, submissions, subscription requests, comments, and 
    hate-mail about Stuck In Traffic should be sent to Calvin Stacy 
    Powers preferably via E-mail (powers@ibm.net) or by mail (2012 
    Talloway Drive, Cary, NC USA 27511).  
                                             
    Copyright Notice:
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    Permission is granted to redistribute and republish Stuck In 
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