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                        issue #7              5/96
                       
"psychedelic fungus infestation of eruopean grain, not divine inspiration,
is responsible for many of the "visions" so lovingly portrayed in the
christian paintings of antiquity.  how many people were pressed under stones
or drowned or burned for satanism while those of faith were quietly tripping
their brains out on bad bread?" - liner note for the song "ergot" on big 
black's "songs about fucking" cd

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- yet another bad ascii and tfile by: rapeman -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

hi, again.  i finally got software for my bbs.  now, i just need it to
recognize my modem.  ack.
well, as i'm trying to get people to read the zine, i'm posting asciis on
bbses.  on this one particular board, i was accosted for supposedly "ripping
off gripe".  do any of you know what gripe is?  is this some zine that i
should know about?  christ, people are bastards these days.
so HEY, you people start sending me stuff.  i want input, goddammit.  i 
feel like johnny-5.  send me fiction, non-fiction, whatever.  if i like it,
i'll publish it.  so far, i have only received ONE piece of mail concerning
the zine.  if you read this, TELL ME.

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                  THE CONSPIRACY MUSEUM & RELATED GARBAGE

Name: The Conspiracy Museum
Originator: R.B. Cutler
Where: 110 S. Market St., Dallas, TX  75202  (214) 741-3040
What's On The Pen: "Correct The Textbooks"

The Conspiracy Museum is probably one of the only museums on earth that
perpetually gets notes in their comments box of this nature: "Smoke more
crack, guys."  Although it isn't taken very seriously among its guests,
the founder, R.B Cutler, is a very serious man, indeed. Having come from a
a very wealthy English family and having been a prolific architect, he has
a sufficient supply of money to explore his hobby, assassinology.  His 
theories are numerous. Among them is the not-so-famous idea that JFK (John F.
Kennedy) was actually killed by a poison flechette fired from an umbrella 
into his throat.  Although his theories may be a bit farfetched, his ability 
to shamelessly blame the government is honorable and more than makes up for 
his somewhat improbable ideas.  He has written many books on the subject of
government coverups, including the topics of JFK, Martin Luther King, Jr.,
Robert Kennedy, Mary Jo Kopechne (of Ted Kennedy and Chappaquiddick fame),
the mysterious shooting down of the plane KA 007.

All the books that I know that he wrote:
- _Goodnight Mr. Callabash_
- _alias OSWALD_ written in conjunction with W.R. Morris
- _EXPLO 007: Evidence of Conspiracy_
- _the Umbrella man: Evidence of Conspiracy_

this list is probably not very complete, but it will suffice.  you can get
these books, and others relating to assassinology at the museum, through 
mail-order or in person.  

Other books that I own that correlate with the present topic:
- _The JFK Assassination Quiz Book_ : Walt Brown, Ph.D.
- _It's A Conspiracy!_ : The National Insecurity Cousil
- _The CIA's Greatist Hits_ : Mark Zepezauer

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I found the original manuscript to the letter that sent to the aliens, 
approximately 1 year ago.  As I have nothing else to do with it, I decided
to publish it. 

        AN INFORMATIVE LETTER TO ANY EXTRATERRESTRIAL VISITING 
        OR DWELLING INSIDE OR IMMEDIATELY OUTSIDE OF MY HOUSE:

        Dear gender-inspecific, if gender applies:
        I don't know how much you know about me, I'll introduce myself.  I'm
XXXXXX [my real name, dumbass. sorry: ed. note].  Ah, the capitalization is
for a reason, namely, EMPHASIS.  Being identified as a consious, self-aware
PERSON rather than an object of study greatly reduced brutality.  This holds
true for most humans, save the psychotic, and I'm hoping its level of truth
does not diminish when applied to extraterrestrials.
        You will have to forgive my abrubtness, but I have some concerns.
Please take into consideration my humble requests.
1.  Please do not mutilate my dog.  MISSY is [was.  sorry: ed. note] her 
    name.  She is very well adjusted, considering she is both blind and deaf.  
    Much to her distaste (and my own) would three disablilities be.
2.  Please do not abduct me or my relatives.  Vivisection, in any form, is
    not a pleasant prospect.
3.  If you feel the need to visit me in my room, please knock before 
    entering.

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as with everything that i put in here, feel free to ask me questions relating
to the issue.  

send me your text.  if i like them they will be published.  

contact me at the distro sites:  
                                vip------------------(214)494-1024
                                negativland----------(214)867-1914
                
although you can't contact me
through these bbses any longer
due to lack of funds, call them
nonetheless:                    hacker's haven-------(303)343-4053
                                one jillion degrees--(817)732-3457
                                the nine hells-------(817)346-3370

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YOU MAY OR MAY NOT KNOW IT, YOU PROBABLY DON'T EVEN LOVE IT OR HATE IT,
YOU'RE PROBABLY JUST INDIFFERENT LIKE THE REST OF THE FUCKERS -                        
                         
                         !THE OBLIGATORY BBS AD!

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                       (information overload unit)  
                              
                              (it's a bbs)
                              
           "more textfiles than drugs in Keith Richard's urine"

                              214/you/wait



grp_eot