💾 Archived View for clemat.is › saccophore › library › ebooks › bofh › bofh › bofhfaq.txt captured on 2021-12-03 at 14:04:38.
View Raw
More Information
-=-=-=-=-=-=-
TThhee BBaassttaarrdd OOppeerraattoorr FFrroomm HHeellll
TThhee PPrreeHHiissttoorryy ttoo BBOOFFHH // TThhee BBOOFFHH FFAAQQ
========================================================================
This page was included from The BOFH Executive Relief Penultimate WWW
Edition as it explains some background info on The BOFH. The BOFH FAQ is
a signature file used by Simon Travaglia when replying to emails that
are BOFH related.
========================================================================
- ******* TThhee PPrreehhiissttoorryy ooff BB..OO..FF..HH.. ********
- *** WWhheerree iitt ccaammee ffrroomm,, HHooww aanndd WWhhyy ****
I get people asking from time to time, so I may as well tell...
Where it came from:
So I was writing the Striped Irregular Bucket and I was in much the same
situation as the poor operator I was writing about. I was bored
shitless. So I thought I'd bash out a couple of lines about something,
and where better to start than a place I knew. So I chunked out Striped
Irregular Bucket, which was far less offensive than some of my previous
posts. Unlike most of my other posts, I knew the area I was talking
about. (Being bored in a Computer Room that is). Then I started getting
mail from people, which was unusual in itself, and it didn't say that my
library books were overdue and it wasn't from story-tellers who wanted
to tell you why they needed more disk, connect time etc. I ignored most
of this and went on with other writing, resurrecting BOFH (who was as
yet pretty much unnamed) in Striped Irregular Bucket #5. Then I got more
mail, so I thought I'd bash out a couple of BOFH articles. So I did,
then ran out of material briefly, so I stopped. Then got some material,
and started then stopped again. That was about BOFH #15, after a brief
splurge into BSMFH. Etc etc. Then I went to Britian for a year and
worked for Enterprise Oil PLC (good place, say Hi!) in London, bricking
out 2 articles in that time. Along the way, Waikato kept my old account
open, so I'd get maybe one mail message a week from someone who'd just
read it for the first time. I still do, strangely enough. Anyway, so I
got back home, took up a job as Analyst Programmer, kissed the Computer
Room goodbye, and thought that would make a fitting end to the BOFH.
To all the people who mailed me over 1993 or so and got no reply, sorry,
but had to login from a Sun Sparc SLC via a modem to a machine which
connected to a machine which let me login via a weird version of telnet
to home in New Zealand.
Anyway, that's the very end of it. I know I've said that a couple of
times, but there you go, you can't trust an Operator. But you can trust
an A/P - Trust me.
---------------------------------------------------------
21-Mar-1994.
Okay, so I lied.
18-Nov-94
Lied again..
May->Jun-1995
Still lying...
December 1995
NNoo mmoorree lliieess -- II gguueessss II''llll bbee wwrriittiinngg tthheemm ffoorr aa wwhhiillee.. IIff yyoouu wwaanntt uupp--
ttoo--ddaattee aarrttiicclleess,, yyoouu sshhoouulldd bbee rreeaaddiinngg DDaattaammaattiioonn MMaaggaazziinneess WWeebb SSiittee
aanndd//oorr SSuubbssccrriibbiinngg ttoo ""NNeettwwoorrkk WWeeeekk"" mmaaggaazziinnee iinn LLoonnddoonn.. SSoommee ooff tthhee
eeppiissooddeess mmaakkee iitt ttoo bbootthh ppllaacceess,, ssoommee nnooww.. NNeettwwoorrkk WWeeeekk ssoommeettiimmeess aallssoo
ppeennss tthheeiirr oowwnn eeppiissooddeess..
========================================================================
- ******* TThhee BBOOFFHH FFAAQQ ********
------------------------------------------------------------------------
------Congratulations on sending me mail, it getting here, and you
getting a reply!--------------------------------------------------------
----------------------This is the Bastard Operator From Hell (and other)
FAQ file v1.6 (Revised Beta)created in response to the sporadic queries
I get regarding things I write and postto Usenet News. You have
received it because either: A. You asked for it B. It
looks like you want some information from it C. I know you're
paying for every byte you receive (which means you'll get
the 2000 line version) D. You're a postmaster and the person I
sent it to passed a bad return address to me. E.
Extra Terrestrial Activity.---------------------------------------------
--------------------------------- Q0. Is there a book? Tell me
there's a book? A0. There's a book. Maybe. Q0b. Where?
A0b. Send email to _c_b_u_r_k_e_@_m_i_s_._n_e_t to hear more. Q1. Can you mail
me BOFH/Quantum Optics/Part 4 of xxx/Party Dude/etc? A1. No
Q2. Can you tell me where to get BOFH/etc? A2. Possibly. It
should be available on Anonymous FTP at the following site.
It may not be up to date at all tho: _c_a_t_h_o_u_s_e_._o_r_g
in _/_m_i_s_c_/_f_u_n_/_h_u_m_o_r_/_s_i_m_o_n_/ Also, my WWW archive is
fairly complete. (_S_e_e_ _B_e_l_o_w) Q3. How many BOFHs were there?
A3. Well, it's a little grey for me, but to my knowledge there was:
2 pre-BOFH texts (Striped Irregular Bucket Series)
~15 BOFH real 2 Bastard System Manager from
Hell 2 or 3 Bastard Operator from Britain
1 Last Bastard Operator from Hell 1 more Bastard
returns briefly 1 more Bastard goes to the Trade Show.
(There's probably a discrepancy as I didn't keep a hot copy
the whole time so I may have missed one somewhere. There
were two "full" reposts to my knowledge: _"_T_h_e
_E_x_e_c_u_t_i_v_e_ _R_e_l_i_e_f_ _R_e_p_o_s_t_" and (prior to BOFB)
_"_T_h_e_ _P_e_n_u_l_t_i_m_a_t_e_ _R_E_R_E_P_O_S_T_" The Penultimate REREPOST (or
REPOST) is the last compilation available, so if you have
that, you have a major part of it. 10-Jun-1995. 1 more
"The Bastard's still about" 22-Dec-1995. 1 more "The
Bastard does Xmas" Q4. Will there be any more BOFHs? A4.
I've given up denying it, I have no idea. I do some for
_"_N_e_t_w_o_r_k_ _W_e_e_k_" (U.K) and _D_a_t_a_m_a_t_i_o_n (U.S) Magazines from
time to time. Q5. Is any of it true? A5. None of it.
P.s. You have a lot of free disk now. Don't thank me,
it was my job. Q6. Why did you do it? A6. At first
because I was bored. Q7. Did you ever *really* do any of that
stuff? A7. Ah.... ... no. Q8. Can I use the BOFH in my
magazine/newspaper/book? A8. What the hell. The only things I
ask are: 0. You acknowlege copyright 1.
You acknowlege the author (me!) 2. You don't edit it in
any way (If it sucks, don't use it) 3. If your magazine/
newspaper/book is earning a truckload of cash I'd
like to see some of it!!! ;-} 4. If you're not getting
a truckload of dosh, I'd still just like to get a
copy of your magazine, book, paper whatever, just to
know how it's travelling. NOTE: The Electronic Rights of
BOFH are owned by _D_a_t_a_m_a_t_i_o_n _M_a_g_a_z_i_n_e or their
publishers. I would prefer that people who have
electronic versions record this cos they've been
pretty good to me over the years. Q8a. What's the copyright
situation? A8a. I retain all copyright on my stuff unless
otherwise stated Q9. You convinced me. Where can I send the
truckload of cash? A9. To me!: Simon Travaglia
P.O. Box 13018 Hamilton,
New Zealand Q10. What if I haven't got a truckload of cash?
A10. Join the club. I collect cameras... (Pentax K1000s by
preference) & United frequent flyer miles perhaps? (grovel) Q11.
When did the last BOFH come out? A11. December 1995 Q12.
When did the first one come out? A12. Dunno, I didn't pay
attention at the time, I didn't think it'd catch on. (I got
some angry mail from people who didn't like it and thought I
denigrated the good name of Computer Support) Q13. Have you
written anything else? A13. All sorts of stuff. It probably
requires a well 'tuned' sense of humour. cathouse.org (_a_s
_m_e_n_t_i_o_n_e_d_ _a_b_o_v_e) has a directory called 'simon' that has
some of my stuff in it. More of my stuff is on my web page
(_s_e_e_ _b_e_l_o_w). Some other stuff I neither have, nor in some
cases remember writing. So it goes. Q14. I'm a psych grad - what
was BOFH's motivation? A14. The undeniable realisation that
Computer Operators rule the world! Q15. Is that the lot then?
A15. Ah. Well, there's a WWW distribution at Waikato University
under: _h_t_t_p_:_/_/_m_r_j_o_l_l_y_l_i_v_e_s_n_e_x_t_d_o_o_r_._c_c_._w_a_i_k_a_t_o_._a_c_._n_z_/_s_i_m_o_n_._h_t_m_l
which contains the most complete collection I know of. Q15a. So
where's this network week site with all the new bofhs? A15a.
_h_t_t_p_:_/_/_w_w_w_._e_m_a_p_._c_o_._u_k follow the Network Week links. Say hello to
Maxwell Cooter while you're at it. Q15b. Ist das alles?
A15b. Ok, there's a webbed german language version on: _h_t_t_p_:_/
_/_w_w_w_._p_h_y_s_i_k_._u_n_i_-_o_s_n_a_b_r_u_e_c_k_._d_e_/_~_g_j_a_e_k_e_l_/_O_p_e_r_a_t_o_r_/_o_p_e_r_a_t_o_r_._h_t_m_l
A15b(ii) Ok, there's also a Russian version (apparenly, I can't read
it) at: _h_t_t_p_:_/_/_w_w_w_._s_a_m_s_o_n_._s_p_b_._s_u_/_~_t_e_a_/_t_m_p_/_h_u_m_o_r_/ Q16. Anything
Else? A16. I thought about getting "The Bound Bastard" or "The
Bound Bastard and Other Stories" printed or maybe a tee-
shirt with "Talk to me and I'll kill -9 you!" but I
didn't know how well it would go. But if anyone can
track down a publisher who had the wherewithall to do
it... Versions of Tee-Shirts were made by JFurr (lost his email addr)
way back, and _N_e_t_w_o_r_k_ _w_e_e_k in 1996. *Late Note* Both Network Week and
Chuck Burke (_c_b_u_r_k_e_@_m_i_s_._n_e_t) are looking at compiling books as at 28-1-
97 Q17. What, no "Sorry about all your files" or "What was your
username again?" A17. Oh, of course. What was your username and
password again? Q18. How many K1000's have you got? A18.
Two. Broken. And I paid for them too. I haven't *EVER*
received one. It would be nice. (Hint Hint)
========================================================================
Previous : _._._._T_h_e_ _B_a_s_t_a_r_d_ _C_e_l_e_b_r_a_t_e_s_ _C_h_r_i_s_t_m_a_s_ _9_5_._._.
Next : _T_h_e_ _B_._O_._F_._H_._ _i_s_ _b_a_c_k_ _._._.
Back to _T_h_e_ _B_a_s_t_a_r_d_ _M_e_n_u.