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title: '2007-03-27-10681'
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+++ date = "2007-03-27T22:03:00+00:00" draft = false tags = \["Ex-LJ"\]
title = "10681" +++ you get those days where you think you're doing
everything right and you start spending your confidence at times where
you normally wouldn't, and you seem to impress yourself and others. You
suddenly make the right answers and HAVE answers and become resourceful
and the existentialist inside yourself ticks all those boxes that make
the day good.\
the existentialist inside you is pretty impressed. he wants to see you
do it again - you're ready to push the boundaries because you're in an
area that you're comfortable with testing.\
\
take yourself out of your comfort zone and you can see how you react.
for me, i hang my confidence and i hang my self respect and i put myself
below other and i fish for help and compl(e/i?)ments. the guys trod over
me and everyone ends up having a bit of a shot at me i feel and i become
defensive...\
\
it was good. i feel better. i'm glad things turned out in mock trial
like they did because next time i'm going to fucking smash that cross
examination and make them squirm.\
\
yeah constructive critcism to you too\
\
um hammarskjold fuck i need to get like 10 pages of stuff off the net or
out of books by sunday\
\
i guess i can do that\
\
neh anyway it's better writing it here than telling someone, i feel
better now\
\
No reward in the day. I didn't want any anyway. I don't care. Do what
you want. I've never left any mark on you anyway.