💾 Archived View for datababybase.flounder.online › dreams.gmi captured on 2020-10-31 at 00:46:05. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
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A weird thing that happens: after I spend a night talking with my roommates, I often dream about the conversation continuing. I don't know why. We're already talking nothing. The epilogue is usually anxious, like I forgot to say one last thing, or I misrepresented a story.
My best explanation for this is that we're not close, but we still know each other from living and drinking together. Habits no one else can see. It's some checkerboard version of knowing, and I think my brain tries to resolve the lack of coherency in sleep. I don't have this dream after being with other people.
I read that it's more dangerous to eat soft foods with mold because it blooms faster there than in something dense. Like mold on bread has probably contaminated the whole loaf. My psyche is a featherlight dinner roll. Used to be hard cheese. Since nothing happens, or rather happening is continuous now, external objects enter and unfurl really easily (either from life or TV or books). Input and output getting closer. The mold analogy makes it sound pernicious but I don't mind. Vessels for now.
We were driving country roads. It could have been Colorado or Wisconsin. Karena was upset about something as we dropped her off in front of a school with dogwood trees. The flowers matched her shirt. I don't know how old we were. Later Maryann was in my kitchen in Oakland and I offered her a sip of my grapefruit juice. There wasn't enough for two but for some reason it was important that we each have some. We were getting ready to drive again.
My boss told me she has a recurring dream of forgetting to finish the last credit she needs to graduate. Funny how our adult anxieties are reported back to us in juvenile contexts, probably to make them easier to face.
Last night I dreamt about Bryan and a blue notebook. We were trying to leave somewhere, there was a lot of Tupperware. Church basement maybe. It wasn’t well-lit or warm. Then I was lost in the dorm. Natalie was there, and I was carrying my pillow by mistake, parading my mess through the carrels. I almost took it with me to breakfast. I just wanted a plate of fruit but I felt too embarrassed, and I wasn't actually hungry. I tried to take the elevator back up to the eighth floor to return the pillow. It took me to the 寶琳 MTR station instead.
I was confused, but thought I could walk through the mall, get my fruit and coffee, and return to the dorm to study before 8:30. Or maybe 9. It would be ok. The station was closed. I’d have to walk to 調景嶺 or take a bus or an Uber. I remember looking out at the wet streets. A jewelry store was open and a 7 Eleven. I didn't know if they had Ubers here and I didn’t have any cash. I asked someone in pigeon Cantonese how to add bus money to my Octopus card and she answered but tittered at me. I was losing hope. Then I heard Aunt Flora calling out my cousin’s name, they were shopping at the mall. I think they picked me up and took me with them. I don’t know if I ever made it back to the dorm though.