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File : SPH1.TXT
Author : Bat Bastard
BBS : The Banana Republic BBS
SPHEROIDS, PART 1
Once upon a time ther were 3 little sisters, called Lacey, Tilly & Benard. One fine day when mummy was hanging out the washing (on the Siegfried line),
Lacy said to tilly. "Lets Murder Mummy and Bernard, and have the family
fortune all to ourselves!" (there was no Daddy for mummy was a 18 yrold
slag-bag on the DPB). "I know, said Tilly, ","since Bernard is a mongoloid
with more toes than IQ points, and may be the product of an unnatural coupling
between mummy and an obscure breed of dog , we'll kill her first". Lacy
agreed, and thereby became guilkty of complacency in a homicide. Tilly waited
until mummy was stoned on DB ,in front of "Neighbours", and went to Bernards
room. Bernard gurgled in imbicilic recognition. This was Tilly. Tilly was her
friend. "hello Bernard" said Tilly. Bernard slobbered. "today we're going to
play a new game, called, 'ORIFICE", Bernard. Do you know orifice?" . Moronic
incomphrehension.
"It's very simple reall, " continued tilly,"I give you this er,...implement",
said Tilly searching for the right word, and pulling out mummies vibrator
from behind her grimmy hindquaters,"and you stick it up as many of
your bodily orifices as you can in a given time, say 30 seconds" said Tilly ,
glancing at the rolex which dangled penulusly about her young wrist, the rolex
she'd been given by that nice man in the park who sometimes gave her sweeties(
the man was ,in fact, the head of the child abuse division of soial welfare, a
man who believed in having things in common with his clients). Bernard
frothed. "here you dumb fuck" cried Tilly, thrusting the vibrator into her
sistrs grasping hands. Bernard grabbed the vibrator, sniffed it cautiously. By
one of those strange quirks of fate by which history is strung together, Mummy
had been indulging in a little S&M , with the man from the social welfare (
who was believed that therapy involved the whole family), and the
vibrator was covered in peanut butter! Yum Yum1 bernard liked peant butter!
Tilly too saw the peanut butter " this guys spreading himself a bit thin, "
she thought, in a flash of byronic humor that laid to rest all frueds theories
of social evolution. Bernard sucked the vibrator. Hee Hee, giggled Tilly.
Fizzle Pop, countered Bernard, for Tilly had removed the earth wire (you know,
the green one) from the vibrator, and replaced it with 3-PHASE 440 V(rms)
mains. More than usual, this toy was live........
......