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 *=--                                                                    --=*
 {       George Carlin: nonconformist, liberal, open-minded, and by far     }
        funnier than any other comedian-come-lately.   His latest effort
 {         has been transcribed for your carnal [dis]pleasure.  Enjoy!      }
 *=--                                                                    --=*

                     *=--                           --=*
                     {              the                }
                           -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=-

                                  present
                               _____________

                     AN INCOMPLETE LIST OF IMPOLITE WORDS:
                        2,443 FILTHY WORDS AND PHRASES

                                  Part II

                          Compiled By George Carlin
                               ______________

                            Text Entry by Havoc
                     {                                 }
                     *=--                           --=*



                                  Lecher
                                 --------

                alley cat                       amoroso
                animal                          basher
                bed-presser                     belly bumper
                bird's nester                   bluebeard
                bum fiddler                     casanova
                chimney sweep                   chippy chaser
                cock hound                      cocksman
                cocksmith                       don juan
                eager beaver                    feather-bed soldier
                fleece hunter                   flesh fly
                flesh monger                    flower fancier
                fox hunter                      fuckster
                gamestock                       gash hound
                goat                            grouser
                gully raker                     hair monger
                headhunter                      horseman
                king of clubs                   ladies' tailor
                lech                            libertine
                lothario                        lover
                make-out artist                 meat hound
                moll hunter                     mr. horner
                muttoner                        parish bull
                pelter                          pinch-bottom
                prigger                         quail hunter
                ranger                          rider
                rooster                         rounder
                rutter                          sexpert
                sexual athleat                  sharpshooter
                skin dog                        smell smock
                son of venus                    sportsman
                stallion                        stoat
                stud                            swinger
                swordsman                       tad
                tit kisser                      tomcat
                town bull                       town rake
                tug-mutton                      tummy tickler
                whisker splitter                whore hopper
                whore hound                     womanizer
                woodman


                                 Easy Woman
                                ------------

                adultera                        alley cat
                bangster                        bed bunny
                belly-lass                      biffer bimbo
                bunny                           calico queen
                charity's stuff                 chippy
                coming wench                    cum freak
                dead easy                       easy lay
                easy make                       easy meat
                floozy                          free-for-all
                free ride                       gay in the groin
                gobble-prick                    goober grabber
                grassback                       grind
                hairy bit                       high flyer
                hobby horse                     horns-to-sell
                hoy lay                         hot stuff
                hot number                      hot tamale
                hussy                           jazz baby
                letching piece                  light skirts
                loose woman                     miss horner
                nestlecock                      nympho
                open-ass                        pick-up
                piece of stray                  playgirl
                pleaser                         push-over
                puta                            roundheel
                scupper                         sexpot
                shagstress                      short-heeled wench
                slot-jab                        soft-jaw
                strollop                        tickle-tail
                town punch                      tramp
                wag-tail                        walk-up fuck
                wanton                          warm bit
                willing-tit                     yes-girl


                                 Prostitute
                                ------------

                ass peddler                     bachelor's wife
                bangster                        barrack hack
                bimmy                           bird
                biscuit                         blouser
                bob tail                        boong moll
                broad                           bunny
                burlap sister                   business girl
                butt-peddler                    call girl
                cannon woman                    canvasback
                chippy                          cock-eyed jenny
                coffee grinder                  come-catcher
                common sewer                    company girl
                crack salesman                  cruiser
                door keeper                     dress for sale
                early door                      erring sister
                fallen woman                    fast-fanny
                fast woman                      ferry
                flag-about                      flash-tail
                flatback                        flax-wench
                flesh pot                       floosie
                foreskin hunter                 frail sister
                garbage can                     girl at ease
                guinea hen                      harlot
                harpie                          hatrack
                hay-bag                         hooker
                hose-bag                        hunt-about
                hustler                         joy girl
                lady of the evening             lease piece
                livestock                       loose fish
                lowheel                         mattress
                merry-legs                      moonlighter
                moth                            need-woman
                night jobber                    nockstress
                notch-broad                     nymph of darkness
                old rip                         overnight bag
                painted woman                   pavement princess
                piece                           piece of trade
                pinch-prick                     pintle-twister
                poker climber                   pro
                prossy                          punchable fun
                put                             quial
                quiff                           raspberry tart
                reciever general                red-light sister
                sailor's bait                   saleslady
                scarlet sister                  she sails
                sister                          sister of mercy
                sloop of war                    slut
                speedy sister                   sporting girl
                stem siren                      streetwalker
                strumpet                        tail
                tart                            thrill dame
                toffer                          tricking broad
                tumble                          vent rider
                vice sister                     whore
                window tapper                   woman about town
                working girl                    zook


                                     Pimp
                                    ------

                apron squire                    ass peddler
                brother of the gusset           button broker
                crack salesman                  fishmonger
                flesh peddler                   gorilla
                honey man                       hustler
                iceberg slim                    mack man
                missionary                      panderer
                petticoat merchant              ponce
                procurer                        prosser
                runner                          skirt man
                stable boss                     toute
                whiskin


                                  Brothel
                                 ---------

                academy                         bagnio
                bag-shanty                      bandbox
                bat house                       beauty parlor
                beaver base                     bed house
                bird cage                       bordello
                button-hole factory             cab joint
                cake shop                       call house
                can house                       cat flat
                cat house                       chippy house
                coupling house                  disorderly house
                doss house                      fish market
                flash crib                      flesh market
                fuckery                         garden house
                girlery                         goathouse
                goosing slum                    heifer barn
                house of all nations            house of ill fame
                kip shop                        knocking shop
                ladies' college                 leaping house
                moll shop                       notchery
                notch joint                     nunnery
                pushing school                  red-light house
                rib-joint                       riding academy
                sporting house                  temple of venus
                touch-crib                      vaulting house
                warm shop                       whorehouse
                whoreshop


                             Masturbate (male)
                            -------------------

                backstroke roulette             bash the candle
                beat off                        beat the bishop
                beat the dummy                  beat the meat
                beat the stick                  bleed the weed
                blow your load                  bludgeon the beefsteak
                bop the baloney                 box the jesuit
                buff the banana                 burp the worm
                butter the corn                 choke the chicken
                choke the sherrif and wait for the posse to come
                clean your rifle                crank your shank
                crown the king                  cuff the carrot
                diddle                          drain the monster
                fist fuck                       fist your mister
                five against one                flog the dog
                flog the hog                    flog your dong
                flute solo                      fondle the fig
                gallop the antelope             give it a tug
                grease the pipe                 hack the hog
                hand job                        hand work
                have it off                     hitchhike under the bigtop
                hump your hose                  jackhammer
                jack off                        jazz yourself
                jerk off                        jerk the gherkin
                lope the mule                   make the bald man puke
                manipulate the mango            manual override
                milk the lizard                 mount the corporal and four
                nerk your throbber              oil the glove
                onan's olympics                 one-man show
                pack your palm                  paddle the pickle
                paint the pickle                paint the ceiling
                please your pisser              plunk your twanger
                pocket pinball                  pocket pool
                polish the rocket               polish the sword
                pound off                       pound your flounder
                pound your pud                  pull off
                pull the pole                   pull the pope
                pull the pudding                pull your prick
                pull your taffy                 pump the python
                ram the ham                     ride the great white knuckler
                rope the pony                   rub off
                shag                            shine your pole
                shootin' putty at the moon      slakin' the bacon
                slammin' the salmon             slam the hammer
                slam the spam                   slappin' pappy
                slapping the clown              sling the jelly
                snap the monkey                 snap the rubber
                snap the whip                   soldier's joy
                spank the frank                 spank the salami
                squeeze the lemon               stroking it
                stroke off                      stroke the dog
                stroke your poker               take yourself in hand
                tease the weenie                tenderize the meat
                the five-knuckle shuffle        thump the pump
                tickle your pickle              toss off
                tweak your twinkie              varnish your flagpole
                visiting rosie palm and her five daughters
                walk the dog                    wank
                wax the carrot                  wax the dolphin
                whack off                       whip off
                whip the dummy                  whip the wire
                whip your dripper               whizzin' jizzum
                wonk your conker                work off
                wrestle your eel                wring out your rope
                yang your wang                  yank off
                yank the crank                  yank the plank
                yank your yam                   yank your strap


                              Masturbate (female)
                             --------------------

                beat the beaver                 clap your clit
                cookin' cucumbers               finger
                finger fuck                     finger job
                gettin' it wet                  greasin' the gash
                hand trip                       hide the hot dog
                hit the slit                    hose your hole
                juice the sluice                let the beaver swim
                makin' some soup                pet the poodle
                she-bop                         slam the clam
                tickle the taco                 two-finger tango


                               Homosexuals (male)
                              --------------------

                alice                           ass bandit
                angel                           ass king
                auntie                          blow boy
                bun duster                      buttercup
                bandit                          belle
                bent                            betty
                boy                             broken-wrist
                brown-hatter                    cocksucker
                cake eater                      cream puff
                cock queen                      capon
                cannibal                        chicken
                chicken-hawk                    closet queen
                cowboy                          dicksucker
                dick smoker                     daffodil
                ducky                           dandy
                daisy                           dicky licker
                ethel                           fag
                faggot                          fruit
                fairy                           flirt
                flaming faggot                  gay
                gayboy                          girlie
                goat blower                     gobbler
                gonsel                          green and yellow fellow
                gentlemiss                      gussie
                homo                            he-she
                himmer                          hen-hussy
                joy-boy                         joey
                lad-lass                        lisper
                lavender boy                    light-foot
                lily                            limp-wrist
                lick-spigot                     malkin
                mary ann                        molly mop
                miss nancy                      meat hound
                midnight cowboy                 mince
                minty                           mother
                mattress muncher                nance
                nancy boy                       nelly
                nephew                          one of those
                pink pants                      pansy
                poof                            panty waist
                powder puff                     pretty boy
                pussy                           punk
                pillow-biter                    piccolo player
                quiff                           queer
                queen                           quince
                rear admiral                    rear gunner
                raving queen                    rimadonna
                receiver                        sissy
                screaming fairy                 sis
                soapy                           sister
                spurge                          sissy-britches
                skin diver                      skippy
                suckster                        sweetie
                swish                           third-sexer
                three-dollar bill               three-legged beaver
                twinkie                         twank
                twixter                         turd burgler
                uranist                         undercover man
                whoops boy                      willie boy
                wonk


                            Homosexuals (Female)
                           ----------------------

                amy-john                        boon dagger
                bull                            bull dyke
                bull dagger                     butch
                beaver eater                    carpet muncher
                dyke                            diesel dyke
                fairy lady                      fem
                femme                           fluff
                fluzz dyke                      gal boy
                gay                             jasper
                lady-lover                      les
                lesbyterian                     lezzie
                lezbo                           lezzo
                lover under the lap             margie
                mintle                          ruffle
                rug eater                       split tail lover
                sappho                          sister
                sergeant                        tribadist
                tootsie                         top sergeant
                wolf


                                    Sodomite
                                   ----------

                bird-taker                      brown hatter
                brownie                         brownie king
                bugger                          bum fucker
                burglar                         corn-holer
                eye doctor                      gentleman of the back room
                gut butcher                     gut fucker
                gut scraper                     gut stuffer
                inspector of manholes           jesuit
                jockey                          reamer
                ring-snatcher                   sheep-herder
                shit stirer                     stern chaser
                stuffer                         turd burglar
                turk                            uncle
                usher                           wolf


                               Anal Intercourse
                              ------------------

                ass-fuck                        backdoor
                bake potatoes                   bend some ham
                baloney colonic                 basco boulevard
                brown                           brown hole
                bugger                          bum fuck
                butt-bang                       butt-fuck
                chocolate speedway              cornhole
                dig a ditch                     dip in the fudgepot
                do a brown                      dot the "I"
                fish for brown trout            fluff the duff
                get some mud for the duck       goin' down the dirt road
                greeking                        hershey highway
                hit someone in the seat         keister stab
                kneeling at the altar           making poundcake
                mustard road                    over the bridge to plimpton
                packing fudge                   paint the bucket
                pop it in the toaster           powder someone's cheeks
                pushin' shit uphill             ram job
                ream                            rectify
                ride the deck                   saddle up
                shit-fuck                       split some buns
                stir fudge                      third way
                thread somebody                 tom-fuck


                                   Analingus
                                  -----------

                ass blow                        bite the brown
                blow some ass                   clean up the kitchen
                eat jam                         eat poundcake
                lickety-split                   play the piano
                rim job                         rimming
                shove the tongue                smear the tuna
                snarf                           suck asshole
                sugar bowl pie                  take a trip to the moon
                tell a french joke              tongue-fuck
                toss a salad                    whitewash the back 40


                                    Fellatio
                                   ----------

                B.J.                            blow
                blow job                        blow the whistle
                bone-lipper                     chew it
                cop a doodle                    cop a stem
                drop on it                      eat dick
                fluting                         french job
                french way                      get a facial
                give face                       give head
                give pearls                     gobble
                gobble the goop                 go down
                go down for a whomp             go down on
                gum a root                      gunch
                head job                        hum a tune
                hum job                         hummer
                inhale the oyster               knob job
                lay some lip                    mouth fuck
                munch                           open wide for chunky
                pipe job                        piston job
                play a tune                     polish the chrome
                polish the knob                 serve head
                slob the knob                   smoke a dick
                smoke the white owl             suck a bondini
                suck dick                       suck off
                suck the sugar-stick            sucky-fucky
                swallow a sword                 swing on it
                tongue job                      worship at the altar
                wring it dry


                                  Cunnilingus
                                 -------------

                barking at the ape              bird-washing
                blow-job                        box lunch
                bush dinner                     canyon yodeling
                cuntino fillet with white sauce cunt lapping
                dive a muff                     eating at the "Y"
                eating pussy                    eating out
                egg mcmuff                      face job
                french job                      french tricks
                furburger                       give face
                give head                       go down on
                go south                        go under the house
                hair pie                        head job
                larking                         lickety split
                moustache ride                  muff barking
                muff dive                       mumbling in the moss
                pearl diving                    playing in the sandbox
                sea food dinner                 shrimping
                sit on one's face               skull fuck
                smokin' in the fur              sneeze in the basket
                sneeze in the cabbage           talking to the boat people
                talking to the canoe driver     telephone the stomach
                tongue-fuck                     tuna taco
                whistle in the dark             whistling in the weeds
                yodeling in the gully


                                 Mutual Oral Sex
                                -----------------

                dinner beneath the bridge       double header
                flip-flop                       head over heels in love
                loop-de-loop                    play hoop snake
                P's and Q's                     sea food mutual
                sixty-nine


                                   Group Sex
                                  -----------

                bunch punch                     chain jerk
                choo-choo                       circle jerk
                club sandwich                   crew screw
                daisy chain                     everythingathon
                fuckathon                       gang bang
                gang shag                       group grope
                mazola party                    mob job
                mongolian cluster fuck          orgy
                pull a train                    pull party
                ring jerk                       round pound
                swing party                     team cream
                three way


                           The Posterior (all parts)
                          ---------------------------

                arse                            ass
                asshole                         back end
                back door                       back door trumpet
                backside                        behind
                bim                             blindeye
                blot                            bogey
                boody                           booty
                bosco boulevard                 bottom
                brown bucket                    brownie
                bucket                          bum
                bung hole                       buns
                butt                            caboose
                cans                            cheeks
                chocolate speedway              chuff
                clunes                          corybungus
                culo                            derriere
                dirt road                       dot
                double juggs                    duff
                dummock                         duster
                fanny                           farting clapper
                feak                            fud
                fudge tunnel                    gigi
                grommet                         hershey highway
                hearts                          heinie
                hind                            hole
                hunkers                         keister
                khyber pass                     last part over the fence
                latter end                      little brown eyeball
                luds                            moon
                nates                           northpole
                orbs                            poop chute
                porthole                        prats
                pucker hole                     rear
                rearend                         rester
                ring                            rip
                round-eye                       rump
                scut                            seat
                sewer                           shit chute
                slats                           tail
                tan track                       toby
                toches                          tush
                underside                       windmill
                windward passage


                                 Excrement
                                -----------

                alley apple                     baby ruth
                brown round                     ca-ca
                cack                            cow puppy
                crap                            dead soldier
                doo-doo                         dreck
                dung                            duty
                horse dumpling                  hockey
                jank                            meadow dressing
                night soil                      plot
                poop                            poo-poo
                shit                            turd
                yackum


                                   Defecate
                                  ----------

                bury a quaker                   chuck a turd
                clart                           dispatch one's cargo
                drop a load                     go potty
                grunt                           lay some cable
                make a deposit                  pinch a loaf
                poop                            post a letter
                scumber                         squat
                take a dump                     take a shit


                                    Related
                                   ---------

                chuffnuts                       clinkers
                dingleberries                   fartleberries
                klingons                        will-knots


                                   Flatulence
                                  ------------

                back-talk                       blast
                blow off                        blow the horn
                break wind                      breeze
                bucksnort                       burn bad powder
                burnt cheese                    cabbage fart
                cheezer                         chocolate thunder
                crepitate                       cut one
                drop a rose                     fart
                fluff                           gurk
                hinder blast                    honk
                lay a fart                      let go
                let one                         make a rude noise
                pass air                        pocket thunder
                poot                            rouser
                scotch warming-pan              shoot rabbits
                stinker                         tail shot
                talk german                     tee off
                wet one                         whiffer
                winder


                                   Urine
                                  -------

                chamber lye                     cousin sis
                golden shower                   long tea
                mickey bliss                    number one
                pee                             pee-pee
                piss                            sis
                tail juice                      tail water
                tea                             wee
                wee-wee                         yellow stream
                zigg


                                   Urinate
                                  ---------

                bleed the liver                 burn the grass
                do number one                   drain
                drain the lizard                drain the radiator
                drain the snake                 drain the suds
                kill a snake                    kill a tree
                lag                             lant
                leak                            let fly
                make                            make water
                nature stop                     pass water
                pee                             pee-pee
                pick a daisy                    piddle
                piss                            point percy at the porcelain
                pump ship                       rack off
                run off                         shake a sock
                shake hands with an old friend  shake the dew off the lily
                slack                           splash
                spring a leak                   squeeze the lemon
                squirt                          strain one's taters
                syphon the python               take a leak
                take a piss                     take your snake for a gallop
                tinkle                          toy-toy
                train terrance on the terra cotta
                visit miss murphy               void
                water the dragon                water the horses
                wee                             wee-wee
                wet                             whiz
                wring out a kidney              wring the dew off the branch
                wring your sock out


                                     Smegma
                                    --------

                cheese                          duck butter
                gnat bread


                                     Toilet
                                    --------

                altar room                      bath
                bathroom                        biffy
                bog                             chamber of commerce
                closet of decency               comfort station
                facilities                      gentlemen's room
                gent's room                     indoor plumbing
                jake                            john
                ladies' room                    lav
                leakery                         library
                little boys' room               little girls' room
                loo                             marble palace
                men's room                      mrs. jones place
                old soldiers' home              pisser
                plumbing                        pot
                powder room                     public convenience
                restroom                        sandbox
                shit house                      shitter
                shot tower                      tearoom
                twilight                        used beer department
                washroom                        water closet
                where the queen goes on foot    whiz stand
                whizzer

__________________________

    Special Thanks To:
__________________________

Pepsi Cola (Diet Pepsi)
Marlboro Cigarettes
Miller Lite

and of course.....
George Carlin
__________________________

-=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=-
      (c) MCMXCI
__________________________